


The Fittest.

by seiraswriting



Series: Sweet Release [4]
Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Angst, Angst and Tragedy, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Heavy Angst, Romantic Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-09
Updated: 2019-03-14
Packaged: 2019-11-14 14:28:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 30
Words: 110,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18054251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seiraswriting/pseuds/seiraswriting
Summary: "Individuals have morals, mobs have appetites." The three months of pure bliss after the Mountain get disturbed by the new arrival of some other survivors from the Ark. Soon, everyone will have to choose a side; something that will be testing loyalties, relationships and friendships that could be broken forever.[Trigedasleng will be translated inside box brackets like these ones, I hope that’ll make it easier for you guys!]Sweet Release Series (3) »» [The 100, S3.]*Warnings: most definitively swearing and some character deaths along the way.*Disclaimer*: I do not own anything in here but Sam's character and her story as well as the original characters.





	1. Wanheda.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While on a scout mission, our delinquents come in contact with the deathliest clan of Grounders and things will quickly get out of hand.

**LINCOLN'S POV**

After fight-training with Bellamy to teach the rest of the kids how to get rid of an opponent, he left to go on a scout mission next to Azgeda territory. Since I had a kill order on me, Bellamy asked me to stay arguing I'd be more trouble than worth and, even though that hurt, I knew he was right. I stepped outside of the ship to find Octavia; I caught a glimpse of her with Sam next to their respective horses.

\- "Girls."

\- "I think he won." –Sam told Octavia.

\- "Did you doubt it?"

\- "I like to think he's getting better."

\- "Are you talking about Bellamy and me sparring?" –I asked petting Helios face.

\- "Yeah, you don't seem too beaten up so I'm guessing Bellamy ended on the floor."

\- "He's too impulsive."

\- "That's what's kept me alive, so I hope he won't lose it." –Sam smiled before turning to Selene- "Where is he anyway?"

\- "He's going on a scout mission next to Azgeda territory."

Sam turned to face me again as her face lit up before glancing at Octavia.

\- "You disobeyed Heda's orders, they could be out for you too." –I tried to convince her- "Bellamy wants you to stay, that's why he didn't tell you."

\- "And you honestly think she's staying behind?" –Octavia chuckled getting on Helios after kissing me.

\- "If he sees you, he'll do something to make you stay."

\- "That's why he won't see me coming." –Sam looked at me before turning to Octavia- "Go, I'll catch up."

\- "What are you gonna do?" -I walked up to Selene.

\- "Watch and learn." –she smirked as we looked at Octavia go.

Octavia got next to the door from which the rover should be coming out which soon after opened, letting the car get out and following Octavia outside.

\- "See you later, big bro."

Sam got on Selene and soon they were both out of the gates, catching up with the rest.  _She's really something else._

**BELLAMY'S POV**

\- "Is that...?" –Raven wondered, looking at the left rearview mirror as a smile appeared on her face.

\- "Sam!" –Jasper excitedly exclaimed soon after.

\- "I thought this time she'd stay back." –I grunted, slightly annoyed.

\- "Since when does Sam do as you, or anyone for that matter, tells her?"

Raven laughed, slowing down the car as Sam rode Selene next to Jasper's window, who immediately rolled it down.

\- "You didn't honestly think I was gonna stay put, right?" –Sam chuckled through the window, looking at me with a smirk on her face.

\- "I was hoping you would."

\- "You have too much faith, love."

\- "Cheers to that, my friend." –Jasper raised his hand as if he had a glass on it and Sam nodded.

\- "And you, whoever threw you that water did you a favor, you stink to alcohol from a mile away, dude."

\- "Not you too."

\- "I mean, I was gonna ask you to come with me but Selene is not a fan of your smell so..."

\- "Whatever, Sam." –Jasper crossed his arms over his chest- "You can leave now."

\- "I just want you to be okay..." –Jasper was going to interrupt her but she cut him- "Shh, now, if you are gonna put music so loud that I can hear it, choose wisely."

\- "Will do, ma'am."

Sam smiled and run her hand through Jasper's head, and if he had had any hair she'd had messed it up. She took back Selene's reins with both hands and started moving after Octavia.

\- "She's too good for you." –Raven looked back at me, a smile on her face.

\- "She is." –I agreed resting my back on the seat again- "But she needs to be more careful, I don't want to lose her."

\- "You can't tame the wind." –Jasper answered- "Sam's a free soul, if you try taming her, you'll ruin her."

\- "That was deep." –Monty whispered before Jasper spoke again.

\- "It's enough she's even with you." –he ended, letting the Jasper from the past months resurface- "I like Sam, so you better keep her safe... Monty could melt her too if you aren't careful."

\- "Enough!" –I commanded, pushing Monty back on his seat before he could get to Jasper.

\- "Whatever."

**SAM'S POV**

\- "Wanna race?" –Octavia asked me as I got to her.

\- "You're about to eat all our dust, sis."

\- "We'll see about that, sis."

She smiled before turning to face forward and commanding Helios to move faster so I did the same with Selene.

\- "Let's go, girl, let's show those two who's boss."

I told Selene before lightly tapping her sides with my feet and leaning a bit forward, which she immediately understood and started galloping right after Helios. I felt so free, I loved going out with Selene. She and Helios were similarly fast so Octavia and I always ended up arguing about who had actually won and, most times, we didn't come to an agreement, but that didn't really matter anyway, for that feeling was all we craved. Once we got to a valley, the Rover reached us and Octavia went to its right while I stood on its left. Jasper appeared through the hatch singing and screaming, making me laugh as he pointed at Octavia and I while he sang. Suddenly, the Rover stopped moving and I looked at Octavia before making our way back, getting down from the horses and opening the back door.

\- "Don't tell me we missed the party."

\- "Sector 8." –Monty looked at Bellamy.

\- "That's Ice Nation." –Nathan pointed out.

\- "Yeah, what about it?" –I interrupted them.

\- "Protocol says to go home, let the chancellor decide what to do next." –Raven reminded us.

\- "Screw protocol, the Chancellor's not from Farm Station. Monty is and so is Miller's boyfriend."

\- "I'm sensing serious business, care to explain?" –I crossed my arms over my chest.

\- "We've got a signal from Farm Station's beacon." –Monty faced me before looking at Miller.

\- "Oh."

I turned around to get on Selene as Octavia looked at me.

\- "What? We're obviously going." –I whispered looking at her- "You can't seriously think Monty would leave his family behind and Miller won't try to find out what happened to his boyfriend."

\- "Try to keep up." –Bellamy's voice made me look up from Octavia, confirming my hunch- "And you..." –he looked at me- "...you stay close."

\- "Yes, sir."

I mocked him before Octavia closed the Rover's door and got on Helios.

\- "What do you think we'll find? It's been four months."

\- "I don't know, but for the sake of those two, nothing bad I hope."

Octavia nodded at my words and we started moving after the Rover and towards Azgeda's territory. Once we got to the border of territories, Octavia and I got down from our horses as the rest got down from the Rover.

\- "These woods must be the border." –Bellamy was the first to come out.

\- "So..." –Jasper followed him- "Where's all the ice."

\- "Much further north." –Octavia informed him- "Azgeda stretches for 1000 miles."

\- "Well, good thing we only have to go 200 meters." –Monty walked up to us following the sign of the beacon.

\- "Still, stay alert. Who knows what we'll find." –I walked next to him.

\- "Remember, rules of engagement are non-lethal force. Tight formation on my command." –Bellamy turned to Raven who was now getting out of the car- "Raven, you stay in the rover."

\- "Yeah, right." –she scoffed moving to us.

\- "We need every gun we've got."

\- "They're coming." –Monty interrupted them- "120 meters...110..." –he started walking again but Bellamy stopped him- "What are you doing, they are our people."

\- "We hope they are." –Bellamy took his rifle and looked at us- "On my command."

Octavia took out his sword and I took an arrow from my quiver, ready to shoot as the rest took out their guns. The voice became louder and suddenly we heard a horse.  _We don't have horses._

\- "White war paint." –Octavia pointed out before lowering her sword.

\- "Azgeda." –I whispered putting my arrow back on my quiver.

\- "Stay calm."

Octavia raised her hands as she walked up to the Grounders and I followed her.

\- "Chon yu bilaik?" –one asked us. [Who are you?]

\- "Skaikru. Ste lufa osir kru au." –Octavia explained we were looking for our people.

\- "Ste lufa Wanheda au." –the other Grounder spoke as the first one got down from his horse.

\- "They think we're looking for Wanheda." –Octavia translated for the rest.

\- "Wanheda" –I took one more step in their direction- "Chon Wanheda bilaik?" [Who's Wanheda?]

The Grounder looked at me up and down and seemed to have remembered something.

\- "Yu laik Samantha kom Skaikru." –he took a step towards me. [You are Samantha from Skaikru.]

\- "Sha. Chon Wanheda bilaik?" –I repeated.

\- "Jasper, stay back." –Bellamy's voice came from behind me.

\- "Calm down, I got this." –Jasper answered and was soon next to me.

\- "Tell them we observe the Commander's truce. Now."

Bellamy ordered and Octavia was soon to speak as the two Grounders who were still on their horses pointed their arrows at Jasper, who walked straight in front of me and to the Grounder. That's when I realized what he was doing: the Grounder had the beacon we were looking for.  _Dammit._  Jasper didn't hesitate and tore it from the Grounder's belt and turned to walk up to me when the Grounder took hold of him.

\- "Weron Wanheda kamp raun?" –he raised his voice putting a knife to Jasper's throat. [Where's Wanheda?]

\- "Taim yu laksen em, ai na frag yu op." –I said taking my arrow and pointing it at him. [If you hurt him, I'll have to kill you.]

\- "Ai na as nodotaim noumou... Weron. Kamp. Raun. Wanheda." [I'm only asking once more... Where is Wanheda.]

\- "Osir nou get in chon daunde bilaik! Beja." –Octavia was now beside me- "Oso na sis choda au, nami?" [We don't know who that is! Please. We can help each other!]

Octavia ended and I realized the panic she felt for Jasper. However, he seemed to be enjoying himself, with a knife to his throat as he smiled.  _This won't end well._  Jasper kept smiling and the Grounder started to cut his neck. I was going to shoot him when a gunshot was heard and the Grounder let go of Jasper as I moved to him to hold him still. More gunshots were heard and soon the other two Grounders were dead on the Ground.

\- "Sam, down."

Octavia spoke and I didn't hesitate even if I didn't know what was happening. I threw myself to the Grounder, covering Jasper and soon after I heard a thud next to me: the Grounder from before had fallen to the ground with Octavia's word on his chest and a knife on his hand. I got up from Jasper as Octavia took her sword and helped me get him on his feet when Kane's voice came through the radio.

\- "What the hell were you thinking?" –Monty yelled at Jasper as we reached the Rover.

\- "We got the beacon, didn't we?"

\- "Yeah, and you almost died." –I retorted- "I had it."

\- "He recognized you, Sam." –Octavia worriedly eyed me.

\- "Shh, they don't need to know that." –I whispered at her and she nodded.

\- "We need to get him to medical."

Miller appeared next to us with a med kit, trying to cover Jasper's wound with what could only be described as a patch-up.

\- "Take him home." –Bellamy yelled walking up to us.

\- "I'm fine, thank you for asking." –Jasper retorted.

\- "Miller, take one of their horses. Raven, since you can't ride you go on the back. Monty, you're with me."

\- "You both alone? Yeah, sure."

\- "Get home now, Samantha."

\- "That's what I'm doing." –I turned to look at Raven- "Selene will take you home, alright? Just tell her to go home and she'll know what to do."

Raven thanked me and Octavia nodded my way as she kept the pressure on Jasper's neck.

\- "Samantha..." –Bellamy looked at me, his voice was harsh but his eyes were soft.

\- "Oh, shut up and get in."

I walked up to the back of the Rover's door and got in as Monty got on the driver's seat and Bellamy surprised me by seating on the back with me.

**BELLAMY'S POV**

I had hoped Sam would go back with Octavia, I told her to go home and her answer had taken me by surprise. I was her home. I was going over it on my head during the ride to Sector 4 when Monty spoke.

\- "We all know Heda means Commander." –he started- "But Wan...?"

\- "Wan means Death." –Sam stated neutrally from in front of me- "So, that means they're looking for the Commander of Death."

\- "And who's that?"

\- "I don't know, but I wouldn't mind being called that." –she shrugged her shoulders- "Whoever it is, won't go down without a fight."

Monty seemed to be convinced by Sam's explanation and focused back on the road.

\- "Sam..."

\- "I wasn't gonna go back without knowing what's going on first."

\- "It's not that."

\- "So...?" –she questioned looking up at me as I changed seats next to her.

\- "I told you to go home and you came with me."

\- "Yeah...?" –she eyed me surprised and then she smiled- "Bellamy, catch up, please; it's been three months." –she laughed- "You're my home, so next time maybe just ask me to go back to Arkadia, although I'll probably won't listen anyway."

\- "Just three months?"

\- "I mean, of you and I being officially together? Yeah, somewhere around those numbers. Of you feeling like home? More than that."

\- "Since we landed maybe?" –I smirked at her.

\- "So cocky." –she pushed me lightly- "It took me a solid, I'd say... 15 days to get used to you so no."

\- "You and I both know that's a lie."

\- "Is it?" –she raised an eyebrow at me- "How'd you know when I started getting used to you? Were you counting the days or what?"

\- "Not really, but I know you and I know you'd have never agreed on sleeping with me if you didn't at least tolerate me."

\- "Well, that's true... I'd still say 15 days."

\- "The first time you slept with me was the night after finding Octavia."

\- "I know that, love."

\- "We hadn't been here for 15 days yet."

\- "How'd you know? I lost track of time the second we landed, honestly."

\- "Because when we talked with Jaha to go on the day trip, he told us we'd been down here for 15 days."

\- "I can't believe it took me so little to fall in your trap." –she smiled- "Props to you, man."

\- "It wasn't a trap, falling for you wasn't part of my plan when I sneaked into the dropship."

\- "I know, it's a metaphor." –she took my chin in her hand so that I'd face her- "I'm glad we fell for each other, I've never been happier." –she kissed me.

\- "I love you."

\- "I hate to burst your bubble guys, but we're here." –Monty said stopping the Rover.

\- "Awesome, let's check what the fuzz is all about. The sooner we do this, the sooner we can go back to Arkadia."

Sam was quick to rise from her seat and get out of the Rover. I shook my head getting out too as a smile plastered on my face.  _I'm so lucky to have her by my side_. I took my rifle and started to walk in silence in between Sam, who took out one of her arrows and placed it on her bow, and Monty, who took out his rifle too and who seemed to be deep in thought until he spoke.

\- "You were right about Jasper, okay?" –Monty looked at me before quickly glancing at Sam, who shook her head- "Is that what you wanted me to say?"

\- "Quiet." –I quickly replied- "Keep your eyes peeled." –I sighed- "I could've said no."

\- "He's getting worse, isn't he? I mean, getting drunk every night is one thing, but smiling with a knife to your throat that's next level damaged."

\- "Well, I hate to break it to you, but you should start calling me damaged too then."

\- "What?"

\- "After the battle with the Grounders and before Bellamy found me, the Grounder put a knife to my throat too, just like with Jasper today... I was so sure I was gonna die... I didn't care a single bit, honestly. I told him he couldn't kill someone that was already dead and he didn't take my comment too good." –Sam stated simply- "I know he's not okay and, yeah, he may be getting worse, but I won't turn my back on him. I'm not giving up."

And with that, she started walking in front of us. I didn't know about that and she said it so calmly... like it was nothing. Monty looked at me as if looking for answers, but I didn't have any. Sam suddenly stopped and raised her bow as we caught up with her. There was movement in the bushes in front of us and, after a moment, Kane appeared followed by someone.

\- "Who's he with?" –Monty asked us.

\- "Indra." –Sam stated lowering her bow before looking at me- "What's going on?"

\- "He must have told her we broke the truce." –I explained and moved towards them- "Sir, before you say anything, there was a good reason..."

\- "I'll deal with that later." –Kane cut me off- "This is about Clarke."

\- "What about her?"

\- "She's being hunted." –Indra explained.

\- "By who?" –Monty asked next to me.

\- "By everyone."

\- "Wanheda." –Sam whispered- "It's her, right?"

Indra nodded at Sam and she sighed. Kane had some coordinates on where she could be, so the five of us got back on the Rover: Monty was driving again and Kane got on the front with him as Sam, Indra and I got on the back. I could tell Sam was happy to see Indra again but I couldn't bring myself to trust her completely.  _They left us at Mount Weather to die... that day I almost lost everything._  The Rover went over a few bumps and Indra looked a little distressed.

\- "That's why I always go on Selene now, she just avoids the bumps for both of us." –Sam smiled at Indra who seemed to relax a bit.

\- "Sir, we're almost out of range." –Monty informed Kane and he nodded- "Are you sure you don't wanna tell the Chancellor?"

\- "I'm sure. I don't wanna worry Abby until we know something."

\- "Well, we know there's a kill order." –I spoke neutrally- "You people are big on those." –I looked at Indra and Sam rolled her eyes.

\- "It's not a kill order, it's a bounty. Clarke's a symbol: Wanheda, the Commander of Death."

\- "So why is everyone looking for her?" –Sam questioned, crossing her arms over her chest.

\- "My people believe that when you kill someone, you get their power. Kill Wanheda, and you command death."

\- "She's just one girl." –Kane argued looking back.

\- "So was the Commander. What Clarke did at Mount Weather weakened her." –Indra explained calmly- "The Ice Nation is emboldened; their Queen wants Clark's power. If her people believe she has it, she'll break the coalition and start a war... I can't let that happen."

\- "Well, I don't understand." –Sam said resting her elbows on her knees- "Clarke wasn't alone that day, so why is only her being hunted down?"

\- "Because she's your leader."

\- "That doesn't make me feel any better."

\- "Welcome to Sector 7." –Monty said as the radar started beeping- "Where to now?"

\- "If she's here, she'll need supplies." –Indra informed us- "We'll start at the trading posts."

We had covered at least half of the trading posts and was now nighttime. I was starting to wonder if we'd ever find her. Suddenly, Monty stepped on the brake so sharply that the three of us in the back had to grab whatever we could find to hold still. I placed my arm in front of Sam to prevent her from moving forward and crashing with the other side of the Rover.

\- "What the fuck was that?" –Sam asked, still holding onto me.

\- "There's a fallen tree, we have to move it." –Monty faced us and I nodded.

\- "Wait." –Indra stopped us- "It's been cut down."

\- "You don't know that." –I answered trying to get to the back door.

\- "Bellamy, stop." –Sam pulled me back.

\- "Fine, I'll check first."

I pointed at the hatch on the top of the rover and she let go of me handing me my rifle. I opened it and started looking around, only to realize Indra was right when another tree started to fall behind us, so I quickly got down and closed the hatch.

\- "We know now." –Indra looked at me, pleased to be right.

\- "You okay?" –Sam worriedly looked up at me as I sat down again next to her.

\- "Yeah." –I sighed.

\- "I love you, but sometimes you should listen."


	2. Their story.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our rescue party encounters some unexpected allies in the forest before learning their story.

**BELLAMY'S POV**

\- "It's been three hours, what are they waiting for?" –I was starting to get irritated.

\- "Even with the light, I don't see anything." –Kane said looking through his window.

\- "I say we make a run for it." –Monty turned to face us.

\- "No, that's what they want us to do."

\- "Then what do you suggest?" –Sam turned to Kane- "Staying here until they get bored?"

\- "They're right." –Indra spoke, taking her sword- "They can wait longer than we can."

\- "Alright." –Sam rose up- "Time to work, everyone. I'm not gonna stay trapped in here until they decide to show up. I'll go first."

\- "No!" –I pulled her back- "For all we know, they could be coming after you."

\- "Yeah, right. They are looking for Wanheda, and that's definitely not me."

\- "She's right." –Indra backed her up- "Everyone is looking for Clarke now, they won't even remember Samantha."

\- "See?" –Sam smiled at me before she realized something- "Wait, what is that supposed to mean?"

\- "There's a bounty on Clarke and one on Lincoln." –Indra started- "But there's also a group of Grounders that would pay to get their hands on you."

\- "You should have stayed back." –I reproached Sam, pulling her back to me- "I told you."

\- "I won't be confined to the camp." –she answered me before looking back at Indra- "Care to explain what that's supposed to mean?"

\- "You were being trained by the best of our warriors, Heda's personal guard, when you disobeyed her orders." –Indra explained and Sam scoffed, annoyed- "Some think you should be killed for treason but others think you'd make a good ally against the Commander."

\- "Wait, you're telling me that because I went inside the Mountain I'm considered a threat to Lexa?" –Indra nodded in response- "Now that I did not see coming. Why didn't I get a cool name then?"

\- "Are you serious?"

\- "Yeah." –Sam scoffed- "Now, let's get out of here. I'll cover you from up here while you get out of the rover."

\- "We'll cover you once we find cover." –Kane nodded, agreeing with her.

\- "I don't like this plan." –I mumbled looking at Sam.

\- "Do you ever like my plans?" –Sam smiled- "Now, get out of my way, love."

She rose in front of me to get to the hatch and opened it; I handed her my rifle and, for once, she took it without complaints and got her upper body outside of the car.

\- "Well, this was unexpected." –Sam mused surprised, lowering the gun- "We have company."

\- "Everybody out or the girl dies."

A male's voice said before Sam was ripped from the car and disappeared.

\- "Sam!" –I yelled as I lost sight of her.

\- "Okay, okay." –Kane spoke- "We're coming out!"

He started placing his weapons down and we all did the same. It should have been me.

\- "Don't hurt her." –I pleaded as I opened the rover's door.

Immediately, I was pulled out and pushed to the ground with the rest following me as one of the Grounders walked around us, looking for something. I looked around, looking for Sam; I found her lying next to Kane with her hands tied up as a Grounder kept her in place with a foot on her back and a knife to her neck. They had taken my rifle from her and both her quiver and bow and she was looking pissed.

\- "Found it!" –one of them said as they took the beacon from Monty.

\- "That's mine." –Monty argued, trying to get rid of the guy who had captured him- "Give it back!"

\- "Monty, let it go." –I yelled, pleading him.

\- "Monty?" –a woman's voice asked and he stopped moving.

\- "Mom?"

**SAM'S POV**

_Mom? What you mean 'mom'?_  The woman took off her mask, revealing her face as Monty was liberated.  _What the fuck did just happen?_  I turned my face to see the same bewildered expression on Bellamy's face. The woman hugged Monty and he returned the gesture quickly.

\- "Fam station, stand down."

\- "Pike?" –Kane asked.

\- "You have no idea how good it is to see you."

 _Not Pike. Out of everyone we could find in these damn woods, it had to be fucking Pike. Hey, maybe he forgot about me._  Pike repeated his orders as he spoke with Kane and finally the feet and knife were removed from my body and the ties cut.  _If they are from the Ark, why did they attack us? Do they think Grounders have vehicles now too?_  I quickly rose to my knees, massaging the side of my neck by which the guy had pulled me from the car as Bellamy came next to me, hugging me.

\- "Are you alright?"

\- "I'm fine, just slightly surprised, you?"

He nodded and kissed my forehead before he pulled me up from the ground.

\- "How many of you are there?" –Kane was now next to Pike.

\- "63. The rest are camped in the mountains north from here. Grounder killers, one and all, am I right?"

\- "Yeah!" –all his people yelled in unison.

\- "Excuse me, what?" –I spoke before I could think better of it.

\- "We kill as many Grounders as we can when they come our way." –one of the guys told me- "How many have you killed?"

\- "I don't kill Grounders, I kill assholes that get in my way. So you better know your place."

\- "Besnik?" –Pike's voice resonated in my ears as I turned to face him- "You survived." –he approached me seeming slightly disconcerted as I stepped back, finding Indra on my way- "You're still as sneering and cutting as I remember you."

\- "Don't sound so surprised." –I retorted- "I'm alive because I know who my real enemy is... I'm surprised you still are." –I whispered the last part.

\- "Well, I hate to cut this short..." –Kane interfered giving me a look, probably having heard me- "We gotta find Clarke."

\- "Clarke Griffin?" –Pike asked and Kane nodded- "If all my Earth Skills students were as good as her..." –he landed eyes on Bellamy- "Bellamy Blake?"

\- "It's good to see you, sir." –Bellamy offered his hand to shake.  _Wait, what?_

\- "You too." –Pike took his hand and shook it as he chuckled.

\- "Okay." –Kane started- "Move the tree."

\- "Help them." –Pike told his people.

I stayed back with Indra because, even though I knew she could defend herself, I didn't like how Pike and his people looked at her.

\- "Indra." –I said as I took my weapons back and approached her again- "I'm with you." –she nodded.

\- "63?" –Kane asked Pike as we watched them- "Farm Station left with three times that number."

\- "We landed with that number too." –Pike answered and looked at Indra.

\- "The Ice Nation can be ruthless." –Indra spoke- "Take pride in the number you saved."

\- "Indra, this is Charles Pike; he was a teacher on the Ark." –Kane introduced him- "This is Indra; she's the leader of Trikru and a trusted ally."

\- "I'll have to take your word for it." –Pike dubiously eyed Indra.

\- "And a friend." –I added threateningly looking at Pike- "Will you take my word for it too? Or am I still just an expendable annoying child to you?"

Kane shook his head at me as Pike carefully eyed me when Bellamy spoke.

\- "Kane, time to go."

\- "Monty." –Kane started giving orders- "Give them the coordinates to Arkadia." –he addressed Pike now- "We have a settlement 50 miles south of here. Your people will be safe there."

\- "You're my people."

\- "Good, because we have reports that put Clarke North of here; we could certainly use your expertise."

\- "If she's in the Ice Nation, you're gonna need more than that."

\- "We leave no one behind."

Kane walked up to Indra and me as Pike started giving orders to his people.

\- "Do you trust Pike?" –I asked as he pushed us to the Rover.

\- "Yeah, he's one of us... you don't?"

\- "Did you not hear what they just said? How he looked at Indra?"

\- "Samantha, they've had a rough time down here."

\- "And we, the 100, didn't?" –I retorted sarcastically.

\- "Samantha, it's alright." –Indra's calming voice followed me into the back seats of the Rover- "They landed in the worst place possible, I understand their motifs."

\- "You're my people Indra."

She nodded as Bellamy and Monty got on the front seats of the Rover and we continued our journey to the trading post. As we got there, we heard screams so I quickly got down from the rover, closely followed by Bellamy and Indra, who had described to us the owner of the place. As we got to the door, we saw a Grounder towering over the woman, threatening to cut her hand so I let go of my arrow as Bellamy pulled the trigger.

\- "Are you okay?" –Bellamy asked lowering his gun.

\- "Bounty hunter." –Indra explained as she looked at the dead Grounder- "Yu hon yu in osir sisplei."

\- "English!" –Pike shouted from behind me as he raised a knife and I took one of mine in hand as I faced him.

\- "Pike, go outside." –I Kane spoke- "Take Monty and Hanna and search the perimeter; make sure he was alone."

Pike looked at me up and down before doing the same to Indra and the woman; he lowered his knife and walked outside.

\- "Samantha, you need to control yourself."

\- "I haven't lost control yet, Kane; if I had, he'd be dead. Just because you trust him, doesn't mean I do."

\- "He's scared because he doesn't understand them." –Kane argued.

\- "Well, he can learn, can't he?" –I raised an eyebrow- "Or he could just trust your word since you're friends." –I put my knife back- "Anyhow..." –I looked at Indra- "Continue, please. I'll translate for these two."

\- "Osir ste lufa Wanheda au." –Indra asked.

\- "We're looking for Wanheda." –I translated, looking at the woman.

\- "So was he." –she answered in English, looking at Kane and Bellamy.

\- "She's in danger." –Bellamy answered- "Clarke's a friend of us."

\- "You're Skaikru?" –Bellamy nodded- "She was here last night."

\- "Did she say where she was going?" –Kane approached her.

\- "No. She was here when I fell asleep and gone when I woke up."

\- "She gave you any indication of where she might go?"

\- "No. But he did." –she looked at the Grounder on the floor- "He said that his partner came back for her. It was Ice Nation."

\- "Great." –I sighed.

\- "I hope you find her." –she told us.

\- "Thank you." –Bellamy said before moving back to the entrance.

\- "You'll be alright?" –I asked her.

\- "Yeah, don't worry about me."

\- "We'll find her." –I said looking at her, reading in-between the lines- "I promise you."

\- "Thank you, Samantha."

\- "How do you know my name?"

\- "Not many from the Sky can use the bow or speak our language." –she smiled- "Be safe."

I nodded and got out of the door, followed by Indra. As we got out, Monty was explaining the plan to Kane and Bellamy as his mom and Pike watched from a distance.

\- "You've been training tracking with Sheda, haven't you?" –Indra asked me and I nodded- "Make him proud."

I nodded and started walking as she followed closely behind me, leaving the rest a little behind. It wasn't too difficult to follow the tracks, probably because Clarke fought back the Grounder and obviously didn't want to go with him. After a while, we entered a field and Indra took out her sword and I knew we were getting close to finding Grounders around and soon we did come near a couple of dead ones, but only Indra and I seemed to notice since we were the only ones really paying attention; everyone else was talking behind us but I heard a weird noise and I stopped and looked at Indra who nodded at me, letting me know she heard it too.

\- "Quiet." –she commanded to the rest of the group- "Listen."

\- "War drums." –Kane spoke.

\- "Azgeda."

\- "You can tell it's Ice Nation from the sound?" –Monty asked surprised.

\- "No." –she answered.

\- "But by their clothes, you can." –I said pointing at the bodies next to us.

\- "We need to get those bodies off the field." -Pike panicked and then looked at me- "Unless you're good with them thinking we did this."

I was about to say something when Indra touched my arm and moved her head, indicating me to follow her and so, I did, until I saw movement in front of us, so I stopped.

\- "There's someone else here." –I whispered to her and pointed towards the noise.

\- "Got it." –Bellamy heard me and pointed his rifle in that direction when his expression changed- "Two people... It's Clarke!"

He lowered the gun and looked at me and I knew what he meant, he started running and so did I, but Indra pulled me back as Pike intercepted Bellamy.

\- "You can't act like that." –Indra reproached me.

\- "We have to help her!" –I protested as Pike pulled Bellamy next to us.

\- "You'd never make it on time." –he told us.

\- "He's right, guys." –Monty spoke to Bellamy and me- "Look." –he pointed in front of us to the army of Ice Nation warriors marching in our direction. How convenient- "No way we'd get across without being seen."

\- "We should lay low, let the army pass and then we find Clarke."

Pike was only addressing Bellamy but he looked at me for some time of confirmation.

\- "He's right." –Indra whispered next to me.

\- "I don't like when he's right." –I answered before nodding at Bellamy.

\- "Guys, there's a cave."

\- "We just got lucky." –Pike pushed Bellamy before him- "Come on."

Bellamy and Pike took one of the bodies with them.

\- "I can't go with you." –Indra spoke.

\- "Why?" –I asked confused- "You've come this far."

\- "Ice Nation has crossed the border. They're marching against my Commander; I have to warn her."

\- "I have to find Clarke."

\- "I know, go." –she told me before facing Kane- "You better find her soon. If the Ice Queen gets her first, she's dead and we'll be at war."

Kane nodded and helped me to get the other Grounder's body to the cave that Monty had discovered. Once we were there, the plan was to wait until the army left so that we could get out and track Clarke again.  _But the more we wait, the more terrain they'll put in between us. There has to be a way to avoid that stupid army._  Everyone was well inside the cave and I could hear Bellamy pleading with Kane, fruitlessly.

\- "Hey." –he came and sat next to me.

\- "Did Pike just call you 'son' or was that my wild imagination?"

\- "He did." –he confirmed and I scoffed- "You okay?"

\- "I don't trust Pike. I mean, did you not hear them say they kill Grounders like it's a sport?"

\- "The Grounders killed us like it was a sport once we landed."

\- "Yeah, I was there, and we solved it." –I reminded him- "Listen, I know you still don't trust them but you've met Lincoln and Indra and Ilion and Sheda; you can't seriously believe they'd harm us."

\- "I believe they won't as long as the truce holds."

\- "Alright, I'm not trying to get into a fight about this now, son." –I mocked Pike- "I need a plan to get to Clarke, any brilliant ideas?"

\- "We are not fighting."

\- "Yet, but if we keep talking about this I can sense we will and I don't want to fight you, I love you. So let's just drop it for now and save Clarke."

\- "We'll talk about this and about what happened with the Grounder back at the dropship once we're back in Arkadia." –he squeezed my shoulder before he turned to eye the two bodies in front of us- "I do have a plan."

We were about to put the plan into practice when I caught Monty's voice talking to his mom. I was glad he had some family back, but I wasn't sure anyone in Farm Station could be trusted. Bellamy heard him too and stopped what he was doing before looking at me; we both went back inside the cave and he sat on a rock before pulling me to sit on his legs as I eyed him, not thinking this was the time but he held me down still.

\- "We landed in the snow." –Monty's mom started- "your father said it absorbed some of the impact and that's why we survived. The now looked so beautiful..." –her voice broke and she started sobbing, making me realize this was not going to be a happy-ending story- "Charles?" –she pleaded.

\- "The children were playing in it." –Pike continued for her- "They were the first to die... 15 of them..." –Bellamy tensed beside me, so I reached to catch one of his hands on mine to squeeze it- "If not for your father, would have been more; he pulled four kids back into the ship, all of them alive today. They got him when he got out for the fifth one. Your father died a hero, Monty." –Monty nodded an started crying next to his mother as I took a deep breath and this time it was Bellamy squeezing my hand- "We've been fighting Grounders ever since." –Pike ended and looked at me.

\- "That was the Ice Nation." –Kane repeated for the thousand time today.

\- "Not all Grounders are the same, Pike. Some are allies, some are friends and then there's Azgeda." –I looked up at him.

\- "They are all the same to me."

I rose from Bellamy decided to put Pike on his place but I saw Monty's broken face and most of the rage I was feeling dissipated into thin air; so, instead, I clenched my jaw before moving back to the entrance.  _It's not like I don't see their side of the story, that was us when we landed. They're just a couple pages behind on our own story, but they need to catch up or things will get out of control._

\- "Thank you." –Bellamy's voice startled me.

\- "For?"

\- "I know you had full intention to say a couple things to Pike... but he has a point."

\- "Please, don't do this." –I turned to face him- "We've already done that, we fought the Grounders, we survived and we have a truce that they won't break. I know your ideas are more in line with Pike's than mine right now, but can you trust me?"

\- "I do trust you."

\- "Thanks." –I breathed, resting my head on his chest for a moment before looking up at him again- "Show me the plan."

In between the two of us, we quickly undressed the two Grounders and put on their clothes; I took my quiver, bow, and blades that completed my outfit as Bellamy hid his rifle inside of his and a dagger I handed him. We were already out of the cave and walking straight towards the Ice Nation army when he stopped me.

\- "Sam."

\- "We've got this, don't worry." –I whispered but he shook his head- "What?"

\- "I love you."

\- "I'd kiss you right now, but I don't think that'd help our act now, would it?"

\- "Be careful."

\- "I'm more worried about you than about me; after all, I can speak their language."

\- "You're very rarely worried about yourself, love."

\- "I know, but this is different... I... I can't protect you from a whole army, Bellamy... and the thought of losing you scares me."

\- "You're not losing me, Sam. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever."

\- "I have your back."

\- "And I'll always have yours."

I nodded, smiling behind my mask as we made it to the army.  _We're coming, Clarke._


	3. I chose you, would you choose me?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Bellamy manage to cross the clearing without getting notice and are decided to get Clarke back but, as it happens, things will take a turn.

**SAM'S POV**

As we were crossing through the army, a Grounder approached Bellamy and my heart skipped a beat; I got my dagger ready to kill him if he as so much tried to touch Bellamy, but he only fixed his position before moving on. I let out a breath of relief before continuing our way towards the other side of the clearing. As we walked through the forest, I noticed there was fresh blood in some of them and we followed the trace until we got to what looked like the entry of a basement.

\- "I'll go in first." –Bellamy was quick to say while taking off his mask.

\- "What do you expect me to do? Stay back here guarding the entrance?" –I raised an eyebrow taking mine off too- "Because that sucks."

\- "They could be in here."

\- "Exactly, and we don't know who the Grounder is and what they can do."

\- "Please, you already scared me today."

\- "And you didn't just a minute ago? Or back in the Rover? Your arguments are starting to suck, love."

\- "I'll go in first and I'll call you once I'm in, alright?"

\- "Your plan sucks too." –I smiled at him- "I'll give you two minutes before I go in, just... stay alive, please."

\- "You too."

\- "You're the one going down there."

He smiled lightly before taking out the blade I had given him earlier and going down the stairs. I watched him disappear and immediately felt uneasy.  _I mean, it's not like we had many other options; besides, what could go wrong? As long as he doesn't get distracted he'll be fine, he's a good fighter and if the Grounder is hurt, he won't stand a chance. I'm just worried because I love him, yeah, that's it._  I was trying to calm myself when I heard a scream.  _Clarke? Damn it._  I quickly got down the stairs and found myself in a room with two sets of three columns only to hear Clarke pleading for Bellamy's life; he was on the ground with the Grounder over him and a blade pointed at his heart. I took one of my short knives and threw it at the Grounder, hitting him in the arm.

\- "If you hurt him, I will kill you."

The Grounder looked at me as I approached him, now with Oreth's blade on my hands.

\- "I won't say it twice, let him go."

I was now next to a column where I saw Clarke tied up. She looked up at me with a mix of panic and confusion in her eyes as she whispered my name questioningly, like I was a vision, before the Grounder spoke.

\- "You're Samantha kom Skaikru."

\- "That wasn't too difficult to figure out since Clarke over here just said my name." –I retorted sarcastically.

\- "I wonder what I'd get if I brought you both with me."

\- "Don't get ahead of yourself; you'd have to catch me first."

\- "I believe he means something to you." –the Grounder moved the blade towards Bellamy's neck and I clenched my fists around my blade- "I'll make you a deal: you come with me and I let him live."

\- "You think you can handle carrying Clarke and me together? You already had trouble being only her..." –I smiled- "I'll make you a better one... you let him and Clarke leave unharmed and I won't kill you."

\- "What makes you think you could do that?" –he seemed to be entertained.

\- "I'm stubborn."

\- "Let's fight then."

He hit Bellamy on the head after stabbing him in the leg, successfully enraging me and knocking him out. I sprinted towards the Grounder, catching him as he was raising from the ground, knocking him down as I landed over him. He was so strong, something I hadn't anticipated since everyone down here was, but he was stronger than any of the Grounders I had encountered since we landed; he easily pushed me away from him, making me land on my ass against the opposite wall.  _Well, fuck._  He rose up with a smile on his face that I immediately felt the need to wipe off, so I rose up taking my blade again and raising it in front of me as he did the same with his.  _Worst case scenario, we all die here._

\- "Let's see what you can do."

I was with my back to the walls at the corner of the room, so I knew I had to get out of there or this fight would be over before it had even started; I took a step forward to separate myself from the wall as he took one back which took me by surprise since he seemed to be leaving me space to move.  _This is not how a fight to death works, what is he playing at?_  We kept this up until we were in the middle of the room and that's when he started to attack. If he moved his blade towards my face I would counter the attack as best as I could, making our swords collide, but something was still not right: he was clearly bigger and stronger than me and obviously extremely well trained, I felt as if he was holding back, but I couldn't quite point out why. We kept going like that for what seemed like hours to me but was most definitely not more than a couple of minutes when I saw he left his face undefended, so I rose my blade to hit him but, apparently, that was exactly what he wanted me to do, for he moved his sword to the side of my head –just like I had done with mine- only leaving me an option; I rose my left hand, taking his sword in my hand to avoid it touching my face as he did the same and pulled me closer.

\- "Not bad for Trikru."

\- "Why are you holding back?"

\- "Straight to the point."

\- "I'm not a fan of going around in circles, things work better straightforward."

He pushed me back as he let go of my sword, taking me by surprise again and cutting my hand as I didn't let go of his sword. I grunted in annoyance and eyed him carefully.

\- "End this."

\- "My pleasure."

He suddenly took another shorter blade and approached me with his sword raised on his right hand, so I raised mine to stop him but, only having one blade and it not being my forte, I knew I was at a major disadvantage right now and there was no way out. I hit his sword with all my strength which didn't seem like much as he simply pushed it away with all his force, making me drop mine; he then pinned me to the ground and placed the shorter blade on my neck.  _I should have trained more with the damn sword._

\- "Last words?"

\- "Fuck you."

He smiled before pushing the blade more into my neck but I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of closing my eyes, so I kept eye contact only finding amusement in his eyes. The lack of pressure of the knife on my neck brought me back from my thoughts, only to be replaced with a growing pressure at both sides of my neck; my hands immediately tried to move up to free my neck but they were trapped and there was nothing I could do before everything went black and silent.

**BELLAMY'S POV**

As I recovered consciousness, I moved my hand to my head as I felt the pain settling in and, for a moment, I couldn't quite tell what had happened or where I was until I saw Clarke being dragged out of the room we were in and everything came back immediately.  _Sam._  I quickly sat up, as my head started spinning, and I realized my leg was on fire but I ignored both as the panic settled too when I didn't see Sam; that was until I rose up with difficulty and stumbled through the room, seeing her on the floor with her eyes closed and her head to the side.  _No._

\- "Sam, what did he do to you."

I quickly approached her body and felt to my knees, placing my fingers on her neck, trying to find her pulse.  _Come on, Sam, please._  After a couple wrongly placed fingers, as my hand shook from the nervousness and panic I felt, I finally found her pulse; she was alive but had passed out for some reason. I held her head and placed it over my knees as I looked for any wounds, but she didn't have any except for a cut on her left hand.  _I should have listened to her._  She suddenly started coughing and tried to sit up but I stopped her.

\- "Hey, hey, it's me, you're safe, love."

\- "You're okay."

\- "I'm sorry, you were right, he should have come down together and maybe..."

\- "It's okay, we're okay." –she reached her hand to take mine- "Wait, are you okay?" –she sat up and moved her hands to my leg- "Bellamy! You're bleeding, this is deep, I need to get you to Abbie now."

\- "But Clarke..."

\- "Clarke is not my priority right now."

\- "But they'll kill her."

\- "And you're going to die if we don't get back, can't you see that?"

\- "She's important."

\- "I know she's important to you but I'm making the call now and I'm choosing you."

She rose from the ground and took her blades back into their place before approaching me again and helping me stand up. I desperately wanted to go after Clarke but right now Sam had more strength in her than me, so she pulled us both from that place and we moved back to the clearing.

\- "They're here!" –Monty's voice came from in front of us- "Oh, no! Bellamy's hurt."

\- "We told you to wait for the army to move." –Kane reproached us.

\- "What happened?" –Monty questioned grabbing me by my free side.

\- "I almost had her." –I mumbled.

\- "Samantha, can you find the trail."

\- "Do you even know me?" –Sam smiled at Kane, letting go of me and turning around.

\- "It's useless, he knows he's being followed now."

\- "If you're afraid, I'll go myself." –Sam quickly retorted and started walking and I had full intention to follow her when Kane stopped me.

\- "Hey, you can't even walk."

\- "So what? We give up? Let him kill her?"

\- "No." –Sam came to my side- "You're going back to get that leg fixed and don't even try to argue with me right now; besides, he's not going to kill her, he's taking her somewhere."

\- "How you know?" –Pike asked her.

\- "If he wanted to kill her, he'd have done that already, wouldn't you agree?"

\- "And why are you alive?"

\- "I don't know, but I have full intention of asking him that question so, now, if you'll excuse me, I have an asshole and a princess in distress to find."

\- "We are going back, and that's an order."

\- "No."

\- "If you can't follow simple orders, then we will have a problem."

\- "Listen Pike, just because you gave me like four classes on 'Earth Skills' doesn't mean you can boss me around. I don't take orders from anyone, so you can go back now and leave me alone."

And with that she turned her back on Pike and started walking when he started to follow her; he took out a shock baton and I yelled Sam to get away but Pike hit her with it before she could do anything and she fell to the ground.

\- "Why did you do that?" –I yelled at Pike, trying to get to Sam but being stopped by Monty.

\- "She needs to learn who's in charge." –Pike simply stated before turning around.

I looked at Kane in disbelief as he didn't say anything and simply moved to take Sam on his arms. Monty took my arm and placed it over his shoulders to help me walk back as I glanced back towards where Clarke and the Grounder had left.

\- "Would you risk Sam's life just to try to save Clarke's?"

Monty's question angered me.  _How could he think that?_  But the more I thought about it, I realized that was what I had been about to do, what I had done since Kane told us that Clarke was in trouble.  _I love Sam, but Clarke... we can't lose her._  The answer should have been an obvious 'no', just like Sam had made it clear if she had to choose between Clarke and me, she'd choose me.  _Then why did I not just answer that straight away? I'm just confused because of the shook and the blood loss, that's what it is, yeah._

\- "I'd rather not have to choose."


	4. An assassin.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After learning that Clarke is with the Commander in Polis, some of our delinquents are tasked to bring some supplies to Mount Weather; needless to say, what they’ll find there won’t make Sam happy.

**SAM'S POV**

\- "Ugh, I knew I should have taken my horse." –Octavia climbed down from the rover.

\- "I agree. I mean, if we're gonna fuck up everything by coming here, at least we should have made the trip comfortable." –I stepped out after her- "I had no intentions of coming back here, once was enough."

\- "Well, we'll be in and out." –she patted me on the shoulder.

I closed the Rover's door after taking the last couple bags when I saw Bellamy looking thoughtfully into the distance; I let the bags down and walked up to him.

\- "Don't stress about it." –I stopped beside him and he turned to face me.

\- "I should be there."

\- "Why exactly?" –I smiled- "Because you're so good at politics, right?"

\- "It's not that..."

\- "They'll be fine. Clarke's been with Lexa for a week; I'm pretty sure she's quite safe there." –I turned around- "But I understand if you'd want to be there instead of here with me; like how annoying is that, right?" –I smiled walking back to the bags as I heard Bellamy chuckle, coming after me.

\- "You make a good argument." –he stood in front of me.

\- "Of course, I do. When do I not?"

I smiled teasingly as Bellamy shook his head.

\- "Besides, you'll be out there in no time. That wound was deep and the last thing I need right now is you being reckless and dying so..."

\- "You and I both know my leg is fine." –he smirked as he cupped my face.

\- "Oh, do I?" –I moved my hands to the waistband of his pants, pulling him closer.

\- "Last night you said something around the lines 'now we have matching scars' right after taking off my pants and pushing me onto our bed."

\- "Huh, really?" –I raised an eyebrow at him- "Well, that's because they were interfering with my plans."

Bellamy smiled as he stroked my cheeks with his thumbs right before pulling me in to kiss me.

\- "Aren't you glad you stayed?" –I questioned as we broke apart.

\- "You know being with you is the best way I can think of to expend my time."

\- "Well, then you're welcome."

\- "But the only reason we both are here is because Kane and Pike are trying to teach us a lesson."

\- "Yeah, it's going to take a lot more than a shook baton and a 'punishment mission' for me to ever listen to Pike; I was technically following orders for once and he just got mad it weren't his."

\- "I know..." –he sighed- "Thank you."

\- "Not again, you and I had a deal, Blake." –I took one of the bags- "You stop apologizing and thanking me."

\- "We made that deal too long ago."

\- "Are you trying to tell me that when things get old you get bored of them?" –I asked faking being offended.

\- "Some do." –he pulled me back in- "But not this."

He pressed me fully against him before lowering his head to catch my lower lip in between his teeth before kissing me hungrily.

\- "Hey, royalty! Those bags are not going to carry themselves inside!" –Raven's voice startled me as Bellamy let go of my lips.

\- "Royalty." –I mocked taking a couple bags and starting to walk- "Hilarious. If I were the queen, we wouldn't be here, trust me."

\- "Oh, really? And where would we be?" –Octavia appeared from the side of the Rover.

\- "I'd like to go see the ocean for starters."

\- "For starters?" –Bellamy questioned as we entered the Mountain.

\- "I mean, we gotta start somewhere, don't we?"

\- "Is this a group adventure? Or just a romantic plan for you two?" –Octavia softly pocked my ribs with her elbow.

\- "You and Lincoln can come too, someone has to guide me there." –Raven cleared her throat- "You are always welcome around me you idiot."

Once we made it to the common room, Pike and his people had completely settled themselves down there and were having a feast. My stomach turned upside down for a second remembering the Mountain people and their decomposing bodies. When he saw us, Pike rose from his seat.

\- "Come, join us."

\- "Someone's made themselves at home." –Raven whispered behind me.

\- "Yeah." –Octavia agreed- "There must be 30 of them in here."

\- "36 but the more the merrier."

Pike answered quickly with a smile as Bellamy approached him to shake his hand.

\- "Wow, the Grounders are gonna think we moved in." –Octavia spoke my thoughts out loud, gaining a disapproving look from Bellamy.

\- "Well, there was no room at the inn." –Pike retorted easily.

\- "And this is your option?"

\- "O..." –Bellamy cut her.

\- "You could have built something, just like the rest of us have; but I guess the easier, the better." –I dropped my bags on the ground- "So much for 'Earth Skills' and keeping the truce that costed us so much." –I spat and turned around, finding O's eyes on me- "I need fresh air."

\- "Yeah, I'm outta here too."

Octavia dropped her bags too and we walked past Raven who gave us a knowing look before I hear Pike once more.

\- "Spirited."

I clenched my fists and was about to turn around to tell him a couple more things when Octavia stopped me.

\- "Not worth it, Sam."

\- "If he keeps going at this rate, we'll be at war again, and I'm not trying to lose anyone nor fight my friends."

**BELLAMY'S POV**

After leaving the supplies we had brought and making sure everything was going alright with Pike's people, I decided to go outside to find Sam and O and check on them. I knew we were doing what we had to do, but I also knew they both had a point. I stepped outside, not seeing anyone until I turned around to see Octavia sat over the entrance and a pair of legs hanging down from the edge belonging to Sam who was laying down next to her.

\- "You okay?" –I asked Octavia and she nodded, when Sam rose up.

\- "Oh, yeah, because coming back to the place where I almost lost everything I've ever really cared about and to see Pike making himself at home there is my actual definition of having a nice time." –she landed her eyes on me as Octavia looked at her before lightly pushing her, making Sam roll her eyes- "I'm fine too, yeah."

I shook my head and made my way up to where they were and sat next to O.

\- "I know you're worried, but we are not the Mountain Men." –I faced them- "Nyko and Lincoln will make them see that?"

\- "How?" –Octavia looked at me- "Lincoln has a kill order on him; he can't even leave camp without risking his life."

\- "The summit will take care of that, O. You'll see, have a little faith."

\- "I thought we could finally get out of here."

As O's words hit me, I eyed Sam before looking at my sister who seemed to just have realized what she had said.

\- "I'll let you both speak about this." –Sam rose, kissing O's head before jumping down to the ground.

\- "I'm sorry, Bell." –O started- "But I don't fit in here."

\- "If you need to leave, then I get that; but you'll always fit in with me."

\- "Thank you." –she smiled taking my hand on hers.

\- "And with Sam." –I smiled looking down at her who was now walking around the clearing- "I've never seen two people more alike."

\- "I told her about it a couple days ago."

\- "And?"

\- "She understands, she feels the same way." –she looked at her- "The only reason she won't leave is you, Bell; so don't lose her, because she may never come back."

Octavia looked serious and I was about to answer when Sam's voice interrupted us.

\- "Mmm, guys, we have company." –she glanced at us over her shoulder before focusing on the brushes in front of her again, taking out her blade.

\- "What now?" –Octavia looked at me as she raised.

We were walking to Sam's side when I realized I knew the Grounder the two guards were pushing with them.

\- "Echo?"

\- "You know her?" –Octavia asked me.

\- "Yeah, she's Ice Nation; she was in the cage next to mine."

By now we were next to Sam who was looking at Echo up and down, still holding her blade.

\- "Bellamy!" –Echo called me.

\- "Let her go." –I demanded to the guards.

\- "She threatened the summit."

\- "I was trying to help!"

\- "Shut up." –one of the guards kicked her to her knees.

\- "Leave her alone." –Octavia asked as Sam rose her blade to one of the guards.

\- "You let her go or I make you."

Sam's threat seemed to work as the two guards let go of Echo, allowing Octavia to cut the ropes tying her hands.

\- "She's a Grounder, what are you doing?" –one of the men asked eyeing the girls.

\- "If you have an issue with Grounders, you can solve it with my friend over here." –Sam pointed at her blade and the men gulped- "Yeah, that's what I thought."

Sam helped Echo up and she nodded, thanking her before turning to face me.

\- "What are you talking about?"

\- "The summit's a trap, the assassin is already there; at sundown, your people will die."

\- "We need to tell Pike."

\- "Oh yeah, let's tell the most sensitive person down here, great plan."

\- "Sam..."

\- "What? We could just take the Rover and go."

\- "We have to tell him."

\- "How do you think he's gonna react when he sees her covered in white paint, obviously belonging to Azgeda, the clan that killed his people."

\- "If he tries something with her, I won't stop you from..."

\- "Oh, love, I don't need your permission to do what's right." –she turned to Echo- "You stay next to me."

Echo nodded at her before we all started walking back to the Mountain. I went in first to let Pike know what was going on before he spoke with Echo; once he learned everything and looked calm enough, Sam and Octavia walked in with Echo, whom Pike asked to sit down and start to tell us everything from the beginning.

\- "I was with the queen's army heading toward Polis... the war chief talks too loud."

\- "You're one of them, so why are you telling us this?"

\- "We abandoned Skaikru in the battle at the mountain." –she eyed Sam before looking at me- "That was wrong." –I nodded.

\- "Won't they miss you?"

\- "Maybe... that's why we need to hurry."

\- "Pike, she saved my life." –I looked at him- "We can trust her."

\- "And you, Besnik." –he looked at Sam as she eyed him- "You trust her?"

\- "I trust Bellamy."

Her answer was simple but seemed to fully convince Pike as he nodded at me when Raven and Sinclair rushed to us.

\- "Alright, listen up. If we want to get to Polis before the attack, we have to move now."

\- "Attack?" –Sinclair asked confused- "Do we have confirmation of that?"

\- "We radioed but no answer."

\- "They may already be dead for all we know." –Pike murmured.

\- "Echo said the attack would be at sundown." –Sam cut him- "It's not sundown yet, Pike."

\- "But what if she's wrong and they are dead?" –he approached her and I felt the tension in the room grow- "We need to be ready to respond."

\- "Don't make this about the missiles." –Sinclair intervened.

\- "So that's what this is all about?" –Sam scoffed- "You came here for the damn missiles?!"

\- "This is about survival."

\- "Yeah, of the fittest, which is why I fail to comprehend why you're still here."

\- "And why are you? From what we've heard in Arkadia you're only alive because of Bellamy."

\- "I never said otherwise." –Sam answered calmly, surprising me- "But that doesn't mean I can't take you down. So now, tell me, why are you really down here Pike? And cut the bullshit of 'we didn't have space in Arkadia'."

\- "If a war strikes, we don't have the numbers... but the missiles in this mountain even the playing field..." –he turned to Sinclair- "...and you know I'm right."

\- "Even if I agreed with you, we still don't have the launch codes."

\- "No, but we have me."

Raven spoke from beside Sinclair and I saw Sam's expression drop.

\- "Is everyone in here forgetting the only clan that's threatened us is Azgeda?" –Sam snapped- "We were all okay living with the Grounders until Pike showed up. Why are you suddenly so afraid?"

\- "Sam..." –Raven started- "It's a precaution."

\- "The only way Pike is getting those missiles is over my own dead body." –she faced him- "Your personal vendetta with her people has nothing to do with the other 11 clans, especially not Trikru. If you hurt them, not even these walls will help you."

\- "Are you threatening me? Have you forgotten how the power rank works here? You're just a child, what would you know about war and pain?"

\- "I really should have killed you when I had the chance."

\- "That's enough." –Pike raised his voice at her- "You're staying here under my people's watch until we come back from Polis."

\- "What makes you think your people..." –she trailed off but seemed to think better of it- "You know what? Alright; but if that assassin makes it on time, I hope you're the first one to die."

And with that Sam turned around to leave as Pike pulled Echo with him and Octavia and I moved after Sam.

\- "You okay?" –O asked her.

\- "Yeah, you keep an eye on Pike and I'll keep an eye on the missiles. The only way we'll launch them is if you radio me and ask me to." –Sam hugged O, who nodded to her words before she moved away.

\- "Sam..."

\- "Stay alive."

\- "We need to talk."

\- "About how Pike plans to kill everyone who's not Skaikru just because he thinks he can?"

\- "I just want you to be alright."

\- "Oh, I'm perfectly fine." –she smiled lightly- "Did you not see me contain myself from cutting his throat back there? I'm growing as a person, see?"

\- "I know, it was surprising." –I pulled her to me and hugged her- "I love you, Sam."

\- "I love you too." –she kissed me lightly- "Now make sure he doesn't start another war, alright?"

\- "I will."

\- "But most importantly, just stay alive, please."

\- "You too."

\- "Oh, please, what's gonna happen down here. Pike literally has me on 24/7 watch now, I doubt I can even go to the bathroom alone." –she rolled her eyes and I laughed- "Now go save everyone on that tower, go save Clarke."

\- "I'll come back." –I kissed her forehead.

\- "And I'll be waiting somewhere down here."

She laughed as she walked the same way Sinclair and Raven had left a couple seconds ago.  _At least one of us will survive tonight._


	5. "You just started a war."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Bellamy leaves with Pike to warn their people at Polis about the assassin, Sam stays behind helping Sinclair and Raven with the missiles.

**SAM'S POV**

I had followed Raven and Sinclair and agreed on looking for the launch codes on the condition that we'd only use them as our last resource to which they both agreed immediately, making me think they were not that much on Pike's side after all; which I had to say, was a big relief. After looking for an hour through a bunch of computers and books, I was starting to think this was even more useless than anticipated.

\- "Damn it." –Raven sighed, throwing a bunch of papers next to her.

\- "What happened to that Raven Reyes confidence?" –Sinclair questioned as I laughed.

\- "It's a 12-digit code, there are a trillion combinations; it's gonna take me a minute."

\- "If anyone can find the goddamn code, that's you Rav." –I smiled pointing at her and she smiled.

\- "So, Samantha, what you got?"

\- "Apart from a backache and lot of information on Grounder blood?" –I said pointing at the screen in front of me- "No code."

\- "Come on, guys." –Sinclair sighed heavily- "It's gonna be dark soon. We're working analog and digital, what are we missing?"

\- "A beverage." –I smiled to myself- "I still don't get how Dante memorized the number, it had to mean something to him; there's no way he'd remember 12 random digits."

\- "Yeah." –Raven scoffed.

\- "He had to write it down, I mean, there are no more options."

\- "Oh, come on Sam. That's like setting the launch codes to all zeros."

\- "Can you imagine it were actually 12 zeros." –I rose from my seat, chuckling- "He was always talking about his paintings and art... he could have written it down on the back of one of his pictures in his office, or maybe he added the number to one of them."

\- "Really?" –Raven scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest before looking at Sinclair.

\- "We don't have anything to lose." –he handed me the keys- "You check the office and we'll keep working the tech here, maybe one of us will get lucky soon."

\- "I hope it's me just so I can laugh in your face." –I looked at Raven who playfully rolled her eyes before handing me a walkie.

\- "If you find them, let us know."

\- "Yeas, ma'am."

 _I just need to find a 12-digit code, I mean, how hard can that be? Dante had to have it written down. Could Cage have changed them? No, he didn't have time for that, he was too focused on killing us all for our marrow._  I made my way from the Command Center to the President's office lost in thought and started to check all the papers on the desk.  _Wao, he really knew his culture and art. I'll keep these and maybe one day when everyone decides to chill for a second, I'll be able to learn more about this._  I made a pile with all the interesting stuff I was finding until the only thing left to check were the paintings; needless to say, the codes weren't there.  _Ugh, come on. I'm never living this down._  I sighed taking the walkie.

\- "Hello, Sam to Raven, come in."

\- "Go for Raven."

\- "You're right, they aren't anywhere in here."

\- "Alright, finish looking there and come back; we'll keep searching here."

\- "Cool."

I left the walkie next to me when I heard a noise behind me; I was in the middle of turning around when a hand was placed over my mouth and I felt a knife on my abdomen; I fought back, elbowing whoever was that and making them stumble back as I hugged my torso. I turned around and a shiver ran down my spine.  _Azgeda, it was a trap._  He moved to me again but this time I was ready; I managed to punch him a couple times as I took my own dagger out, stabbing him in the stomach too, making him let go of his dagger.

\- "Chit yu gaf?" [What do you want?]

He didn't answer me, instead he took a vase from one of the shelves next to him and approached me; I managed to avoid him the first two times, cutting his arm but his fist soon collapsed with my stomach, right on the wound, making me double in pain and falling to the ground as the vase hit me on the head.

\- "Sam?" -Raven asked through the walkie.

 _She must have heard us._  I couldn't reach the walkie, for I was lying on the middle of the room bleeding and with very little force left. Raven kept talking on the walkie as the Grounder did something with Dante's desk; I couldn't quite see what it was, but I was sure nothing good would come out of this. A beeping noise started to come out of the table as the Grounder walked past me to leave, completely ignoring me; I took my chances and rose as fast as I could to the table.  _No, no, no._  I took the walkie.

\- "Raven, an Ice Nation Grounder came in and set off the self-destructive sequence. You have to get out of here, now."

\- "We can get him, maybe get the codes."

\- "I need you to get out of here in less than 45 seconds."

**RAVEN'S POV**

As Sam was explaining what had happened, I saw a shadow walk past our door and Sinclair immediately started running after them as I followed as fast as I could.

\- "We'll get him."

\- "Raven, there's no going back. 30 seconds. There's no option in the panel to turn it off." –I heard Sam whimper lowly- "I'm sorry. I love you."

I could see the exit in front of me now.

\- "We'll fix this, Sam."

As I stepped outside, I saw the Grounder fighting Sinclair; he had him pinned to the ground and was about to stab him when I remembered I had a gun on me; I shoot him and he fell to the ground next to Sinclair as I approached them.

\- "The numbers on his arm, now."

He turned him over to check his arms only to find he had cut over them and they were impossible to read. _No... this is not happening._

**BELLAMY'S POV**

Once we made it to the entrance of Polis, we all got down from the Rover as we saw out other cars parked there.

\- "Where are the guards?" –I asked more concerned than annoyed as I got down from the Rover- "Protocol would be to leave someone behind."

\- "They did."

Octavia spoke from the other side of the cars as I heard her take out her sword; I checked the first vehicle and I saw what she meant. Pike was walking after me and soon walked up to Echo.

\- "This was your people."

\- "Hey, she warned us." –Octavia defended her after Echo spoke something in Trigedasleng that didn't sound too friendly- "This proves she was telling the truth."

\- "We don't have time for this; the attack is at sundown."

\- "I'm not leaving my blade here." –Octavia turned to Echo after reading one of the signs.

\- "None of us are." –Echo was quick to answer- "We go in through the tunnels; the entrance is this way."

She started walking and we followed her. Knowing of the existence of this tunnels could be useful in the future. After walking for a couple minutes, we got to the elevator shaft that Echo had told us about.

\- "Two guards." –I pointed out.

\- "They raise the lift; the elevator shaft is out only way in: we have to climb."

Pike got to the corner to check the guards and started moving after them, claiming he got the one on the left; I was quick to follow to get rid of the one on the right.

\- "What's wrong with you?" –Octavia asked as she joined us- "You didn't have to kill them. They just worked the elevator."

\- "Yes, I did." –I answered her before looking at Pike who nodded in approval; I moved to open the elevator doors and look up- "How many floors?"

\- "All of them." –Echo answered next to Octavia.

I started climbing first, followed closely by Pike. Once we got to the last floor, I took the guard that was on the door by the neck as Octavia opened the doors and we entered the room where all the ambassadors from the clans were along with the Commander, Clarke, Abbie, and Kane.

\- "Bellamy?" –Clarke looked at me confused.

\- "What is the meaning of this?" –a Grounder asked.

\- "The summit's a trap." –I let go of the Grounder and turned to Clarke- "We need to get you out of here."

\- "What the hell is going on?" –Clarke angrily asked the Commander.

\- "I don't know."

\- "It's the Ice Nation." –I explained.

\- "These allegations are an outrage." –a Grounder stepped forward- "The Ice Nation never stormed this summit with weapons, breaking our laws; that was Skaikru."

\- "We're right about this." –I pointed my rifle at him.

\- "The two guards you left behind are already dead." –Pike spoke to Kane- "We need to go now."

\- "How did you come by this information?"

The Commander asked us and we turned around only to find that Echo was nowhere to be found.

\- "Where the hell is Echo?"

\- "What's going on? Where the hell is she?" –I looked at Pike and Octavia.

\- "Bell... maybe we were wrong about this."

\- "I don't understand."

\- "Stand down." –Kane approached me, taking my rifle.

\- "Bellamy... Bellamy, come in." –Raven's voice was shaking as it came through my walkie- "The Grounders attacked Mount Weather. It was Ice Nation."

\- "What are you talking about?"

\- "Sam told me the Grounder was Ice Nation before..."

\- "Before what?"

\- "It's gone... it's all gone... They are all gone... Sinclair and I are the only ones left. I'm so sorry."

I felt my heart shrunk in pain.  _This is not what I meant when I thought at least one of us would survive... it was supposed to be her, it's always been her._  Octavia walked up to me and took the walkie as I let go of it, hearing Raven cry at the other end.

\- "She can't be gone." –I whispered as Octavia hugged me- "Sam..."

The silence was made in the room as everyone realized what this meant.

\- "You should've never moved your people back into Mount Weather." –the Grounder from before started talking again- "The Ice Nation did what Lexa was too weak to do."

\- "I will kill you!"

I yelled at him, getting rid of Octavia but Kane pushed me back. Everyone on the room started chattering lightly as Lexa approached him when I stopped hearing Raven sobbing and a loud thud replaced her cries.

**RAVEN'S POV**

\- "Raven..." –I heard a voice behind us, barely a whisper.

\- "Oh my God, Sam!" –I dropped the walkie on the ground and walked as fast as I could up to her, her clothes were burning- "Sam, hold on!"

However, before I could get to her, she fell to the ground flat on her face as the tears pulled down my eyes; Sinclair came after me and in between the two of us we managed to extinguish the fire on her clothes before turning her around, only to find she was covered in ashes, had been stabbed on the abdomen and had multiple cuts on her body, probably from the explosion.

\- "Raven! Sinclair!" –Octavia's voice came in through the walkie- "What's going on now."

\- "It's... it's Samantha. She's barely alive... she..." –Sinclair answered as I was unable to speak.

\- "She what!" –Bellamy demanded almost screaming- "Sam!"

\- "She was still inside when the explosion happened, she's burnt and they've stabbed her in the abdomen, we need to take her back to Arkadia immediately, we need Abbie."

\- "Sam, stay with me." –I whispered in between sobs, caressing her cheeks.

She nodded lightly before moving her shaky hand towards Sinclair and pointing at the walkie; he left it on and moved it to her mouth as we both assumed she'd want to talk to Bellamy, and she spoke on the radio with a raspy, broken yet steady voice.

\- "Azgeda, yu jos stot wor au." [Ice Nation, you just started a war]


	6. Love is weakness.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellamy goes to find Clarke to get some help. Once they arrive back at the dropship, things get worse by the minute; they need to figure out a way out of this mess while also dealing with the Grounders threat. But what can they do?

**RAVEN'S POV**

After everything that happened at Mount Weather and once we went back to Arkadia, something always felt off. Bellamy was the first person that came through the door closely followed by Abbie and towards the Medical Center where Sinclair and I had left Sam on Jackson's hands. Bellamy came out soon after, probably kicked out by Abbie, with his shoulders dropped and looking down but was soon stopped by Pike who patted him in the back as he spoke to him and Bellamy soon recovered his composure; I wasn't sure how to feel about that but I let it go.

\- "Hey." –he approached me- "How are you?"

\- "I'm fine. Sam saved me again; if it weren't for her, if she hadn't told us... Sinclair and I would be dead too."

\- "What happened to him?"

\- "The Grounder put up a fight once we were out."

\- "I see..."

\- "Are you okay?"

\- "I wasn't there."

\- "You know what I mean..." –I glanced at him before looking back at the Medical Center's door.

\- "Abbie says she's lost a lot of blood and has a couple first-degree burns on her back... she says she's lucky to be alive..."

\- "Hey, she'll get through this." –I squeezed his shoulder- "She just needs a little time and rest, I'm sure Abbie and Jackson will take good care of her."

\- "Raven..." –he sighed looking at his hands- "It's my fault."

\- "What?"

\- "She stayed back at Mount Weather because of me."

\- "That's not true, she stayed back because she doesn't trust Pike."

\- "I didn't ask her to come with me, I know she'd have." –he sighed running a hand through his hair- "It's always been my fault... every time she's been about to die it's been because of me: the day we went to look for Octavia, the battle against the Grounders and both times she's been at the Mountain... It's my fault, Raven, I keep getting her hurt some way of another and I can't stand it."

I didn't know what to say; I didn't know Bellamy had been feeling like this all this time.

\- "Bellamy..." –I started but someone cut me off.

\- "Bellamy? We need you."

Jackson came out of the Medical Center and Bellamy was quick to leave after him, leaving me to my thoughts.  _Each of those times it was Sam who made the call and he knows it but, for some reason, he keeps blaming himself. He needs to figure this out before it gets worse and he breaks both of them... I need to talk with Sam._

**BELLAMY'S POV**

It's been about a week since the explosion at the Mountain. Sam's back on her feet and has left camp to meet Ilion and Sheda away from Pike to let them know she's fine.  _They are Grounders yet they care about her._  I knew they were having a meeting about what to do about the attack so I went and waited patiently at the door; I knew what I had to do. The door finally opened and Pike came out looking somewhere between defeated and irritated, leaving Kane and Abbie in side; once Abbie left I entered the room.

\- "Sir."

\- "Why aren't you at your post?" –Kane asked me, he looked tired.

I placed my guard jacket over the table, no need for words.

\- "Don't do this."

\- "Forty-nine of the people I swore to protect died yesterday and one got severely hurt because I left."

\- "That's not your fault, Bellamy." –Kane turned to face me- "Place the blame where it belongs; on the Ice Nation."

\- "The Ice Nation didn't leave Sam behind." –I sighed as I felt the rush of emotions hit me- "That was me."

\- "Samantha has recovered almost fully thanks to you."

\- "She wouldn't have needed me if she hadn't stayed."

\- "Given the information you had at the time, you made a reasonable choice." –Kane stood up and placed a hand on my shoulder- "You were trying to save lives."

\- "But I didn't."

I sighed looking at my jacket one last time and left before the tears started running down my face.  _It's my fault, it's always been my fault. I can't do this..._

**SAM'S POV**

I had left Arkadia to meet Ilion and Sheda away from Pike because I didn't trust him one bit. It had taken me a week to recover this time and Octavia had made sure they knew one of the times she left camp so that they wouldn't come here.

\- "Sam!" –Ion yelled as soon as Selene and I made it to the clear.

\- "Hey guys!"

\- "It's so good to see you."

I got down from Selene and left her grazing in peace with Sheda and Ion's horses as they walked up to me.

\- "We need to talk."

\- "About?"

\- "There's this new guy on our camp and he's... well... stirring shit around."

\- "Are you safe there?" –Ion was quick to ask and I smiled seeing how concerned he was about me.

\- "Yeah, but I don't want you guys coming there. He has it out for every Grounder he sees; I've tried to explain him a million times that not every Grounder is like Azgeda but he just won't listen."

\- "We will protect you, you're part of the coalition now."

\- "We are all Grounders now, I know, but Pike doesn't understand that... Azgeda killed his people and now he want's revenge; I'm afraid he'll do something insane."

\- "Where do your people stand on this?"

\- "I want to say we all want to live in peace but the people that came with him have started spreading rumors... I'm hoping they'll come around and if anything changes I will let you know. I don't want another war, even less if we..." –I pointed at the three of us- "...aren't on the same side."

\- "We're just glad you survived."

\- "Octavia told us what happened, we're sorry." –Sheda squeezed my arm- "Tell Bellamy it's not his fault."

\- "Bellamy and I aren't exactly on speaking terms right now."

\- "What happened?"

\- "I... I don't know." –I sighed- "It was all good until Pike showed up and after the Mountain he won't speak to me, he doesn't look at me... I've tried cornering him but he's been avoiding me at any cost."

\- "Maybe he needs time to process it all..."

\- "He wasn't even there when I woke up, Sheda. I mean, the first time he was but then it was either Octavia with Lincoln or Raven and Jasper and Monty sometimes too."

\- "I'm sorry, Sam, I know how you feel about him. I hope he isn't blaming himself for this."

\- "The only ones to blame for this are Azgeda and I hope the Commander asks for the Queen's head or I'll have to go take it myself."

After talking with Sheda and Ion for around an hour, I made my way back to Arkadia. As I was getting there, I saw a familiar Grounder in a group.

\- "Nyko? Is that you?"

\- "Samantha kom Skaikru!"

\- "What happened? Are you okay?"

I got down from Selene and walked up to him checking everyone on his group.

\- "I'm bringing these people to your Medical Centre; your chancellor told me you'd help."

\- "Sure." –I nodded- "Who's worse? We can put them on Selene so they don't have to walk."

\- "Thank you, Samantha. I'm glad to know you survived the attack at the Mountain."

\- "Me too."

With Nyko's help, we helped an old woman on Selene and I took the reins on one hand as I helped another guy walk. It took us a little longer than expected to get there and, once we did, we didn't exactly get a warm welcome. The guards opened the door but soon started to check every person and even pushing them.

\- "Hey!" –I let go of the guy who held onto Nyko as I approached one of the guards- "If you want to keep that hand, I'd be more careful of how I treat these people."

\- "Are you threatening a member of the guard?" –he approached me, trying to intimidate me with his stature.

\- "Are you afraid I did?" –I pushed him back- "Because it wouldn't be the first time."

\- "Sam! Nyko!" –Octavia came running next to us.

\- "Why are they here?" –the same guard asked us- "Why did you bring Grounders to our camp?"

\- "The Chancellor told Nyko that we'd help." –Octavia explained quickly.

\- "You're one of them, you take them in."

\- "Oh, but of course we're one of them. We know how to fight, we know how to survive and we most definitely know who our real enemy is, something you people wouldn't distinguish even if I painted a target on it."

\- "Sam..." –Octavia looked at me.

\- "And now, if you'd be as so kind as to move your useless from my way, I was getting my people to the Medical Centre."

I turned around not waiting for an answer and took Selene's reins and the guy from earlier and started moving to where Abbie was.  _Idiots._

That afternoon was set to be the memorial for the Mount Weather victims and, even if I didn't know anyone who died, I decided to show up to pay my respects just like everyone else. Everything was going just fine until a group of Pike's people entered the room and spoke to him just as Lincoln joined me on the back.

\- "What's wrong now?"

\- "Heda's army is here, the one she promised to send to protect this camp."

\- "I'm guessing Pike won't like this."

\- "Ion is there."

\- "Wait what?"

\- "Once he learnt what was going on, he asked Indra to take him in."

\- "I'm going to kick his ass as soon as I'm out of here."

\- "You gave a Grounder one of our radios?" –Pike's voice became louder.

_Oh no._

\- "Sir, are we under attack?" –Monty's mother rose form her seat and asked.

_I like Monty, but I seriously can't stand that woman._

\- "No, we're not under attack; the Commander sent a peacekeeping force to ensure that we can defend against any further attacks from the Ice Nation."

\- "Peacekeeping force?" –Pike started- "Even you can't be that naïve, Marcus."

\- "Watch your tone, you're talking to the next Chancellor." –Abbie intervened before addressing the crowd- "We're all grieving, this has been hard on all of us, but we can't let anger drive our policy."

\- "Anger is our policy." –Pike stated and his people agreed- "If they are here to defend us, as you say, then tell them to go home. We can defend ourselves!"

His people started cheering and I decided I had had enough.

**BELLAMY'S POV**

\- "So..." –Sam stood up and moved to the center of the hallway to face Pike; I hadn't even noticed she was here- "...you're telling me that we are now part of the coalition, we have an army ready to protect us from the real threat and you want them to go away? How's that for tactical intelligence."

\- "What are you doing here." –he looked puzzled to see she had come.

\- "Well, contrary to popular belief, I'm not heartless yet; I came to pay my respects like everyone else."

\- "You're one of them, you should leave."

\- "Why? Am I a threat too?" –she crossed her arms over her chest almost threateningly, Pike didn't answer- "I mean, it wasn't really a question, I could go ahead and kill you right now in front of everyone and no one could stop me but I won't, you wanna know why? Because I'm trying to give you a second change, but you are making it very, very difficult."

\- "We don't need them, we can defend ourselves."

\- "Yeah!" –people chanted again.

\- "Hold up, I'm seeing a hole in your magnificent plot." –she stepped closer raising a hand- "When we were at Mount Weather you said we couldn't defend ourselves and we needed the missiles and now you're telling them we can do it ourselves? Either you have terrible memory or are just plain stupid."

\- "I didn't say that." –Pike denied but his voice betrayed him.

I was there when he did.

\- "Just because the one person that was there with me to back me up won't because you've apparently managed to brainwash him too..." –she glanced at me and I quickly looked away- "...doesn't mean I'm lying. You made me stay in the Mountain with Sinclair and Raven to look for the launch codes; you wanted to shoot them to Polis, where not only there's no real army but it's a real city with real kids. I know this would have been much easier for you if I had burnt there, but I won't apologize for surviving."

\- "And why did you survive?" –I raised my head again to see Pike moving towards her, he wanted to intimidate her but he didn't know Sam- "Because you ran away and left my people to die."

\- "I didn't leave your people to die, they died the second that Azgeda asshole put the codes down and started the countdown with no way to reverse it. I tried like I always do but you wouldn't know shit because you're blinded by your fear." –she pointed at him- "And I survived because there's someone I need to kill before I die, but had you been down there, I'd made sure you wouldn't have come out."

\- "You." –a man stood up and pointed at Sam- "You speak like that because you're one of them. You don't belong here."

\- "And he doesn't either." –they pointed at Lincoln.

\- "If you touch Lincoln..." –Sam threatened- "...I will slit your throat, so watch your next move very carefully."

\- "You're wounded, we all know that."

\- "I can guarantee I'll take at least half of you down with me."

Someone threw a rock at Lincoln and Sam threw them a pocket knife to the leg in return as she run next to Lincoln while a couple guards tried to break the fight. I knew she could have killed them but she chose not to, but these people didn't know Sam. A whistle made everyone stop and look around to see Pike had stood up on a chair.

\- "We do not attack our own." –Pike started- "Fighting each other only makes us weak! The enemy is not in this camp, the enemy is out there."

As Pike kept talking I crossed gazes with Sam, I could only read disappointment in her eyes before she turned to Lincoln who was bleeding from the right side of his head. Abbie moved to them to check him but Lincoln quickly left through the door, leaving Sam and Abbie looking worried; Abbie lowered her gaze to Sam's hands and took them in hers, Sam shook her head trying to brush it off but Abbie seemed to insist and she gave in, following her out of there. _I have to make this right._

**LINCOLN'S POV**

I walked out of there feeling enraged. I was bleeding from the side of my head and the world was spinning around as I fell to my knees.  _I have to make this right because they won't._  I remembered Octavia's words and repeated them out loud.

\- "Ge smak daun, gyon op nodotaim." [Get knocked down, get back up.]

I grunted in pain as I rose from the ground and slowly made my way to the Medical Centre where I found Abbie taking care of Sam's hands; I hadn't noticed but she had gotten into a fight with one of the men attacking me and her knuckles had bleed.

\- "How are you feeling, big bro?" –she greeted me with a smile.

\- "Ge smak daun, gyon op nodotaim."

\- "Bilaik chit grounders dula op... chit Oso dula op." [That is what Grounders do... what we do.]

I nodded as Abbie came back with more supplies to take care of my wound when Kane and Pike entered the room.

\- "No, no charges."

\- "Lincoln..." –Kane addressed me- "...we need to set an example."

\- "Yeah, we do."

\- "The man just lost his son, Marcus."

\- "Lincoln didn't do that." –Abbie reproached Pike.

\- "It was Azgeda." –Sam reminded them, sat next to me.

\- "This is your fault." –Pike pointed at Sam who straightened next to me.

\- "How come everything is always my fault when you're around?"

\- "If you hadn't spoken like that to me, this wouldn't have happened."

\- "You're the one who fueled their hatred, we were just fine before you and your people came here. All you've done since you arrived is break everything we've worked so hard to build... And, if you don't realize that soon, a lot of people will die."

\- "It's that a threat?"

\- "No, it's a forewarning."

And with that, she squeezed my hand and jumped from the table we were sat on to the ground, leaving us there. I spent the whole afternoon helping Abbie on the Medical Centre, translating for her and the people Nyko had brought here sick. At night, I found Sam talking with Harper.

\- "Something's wrong, we should prepare."

\- "What is wrong?" –I looked in between the both of them.

\- "Harper..."

\- "I heard Pike talking with Bellamy about taking action; I'm not sure what they meant but it happens tonight."

\- "I think Pike is trying something against the army."

\- "We can't let that happen."

\- "Which is why we're all geared up and going to guard the door."

\- "I'm in."

\- "I know."

Sam smiled and we made our way to the camp's entrance as I hoped this wouldn't end up badly for any of us. Eventually, a group of shadows could be distinguished walking towards us; they were leaded by Bellamy who stood directly in front of me as Sam stood right next to me and Harper and Monroe right behind us at our sides. Bellamy's eyes wandered off to Sam for a second and I still couldn't understand what was going on between the two of them. He quickly composed himself and looked at me.

\- "You need to step aside right now."

\- "What are the guns for?" –Harper questioned him.

\- "There's an army out there, we need to hit them before they hit us."

\- "That army was sent to protect us." –I spoke as Sam scoffed next to me.

\- "Do we have a problem?" –Pike approached us now.

\- "No." –Bellamy answered without looking at him.

\- "Yes. Yes, we do." –Sam took a step forward, standing almost next to Bellamy but completely ignoring him- "You are the problem, Pike."

\- "Sam..." –I wanted to say something to stop her but I knew Sam was right.

\- "I have always done what's best for us." –Bellamy spoke to me before glancing at Sam, who had her eyes still on Pike- "I need you to trust that I'm doing that right now."

It was almost uncomfortable to watch them. Bellamy had put especial emphasis on the third word as he looked at Sam and I could tell she knew for she slowly turned her face to catch his eyes but, as soon as he saw her, he turned to look at me. It was as if she made him uncomfortable, he couldn't even look at Sam and she knew, but I wasn't sure even she knew the reason.

\- "Monroe, Harper."

Bellamy looked at them and they both left apologizing to me and Sam who turned to watch them go and walked next to me.

\- "You too Lincoln." –Pike spoke now- "You wanna prove you're one of us, let us pass."

\- "I'm not moving."

\- "Besnik."

\- "I'm not backing down either, so you're gonna have to start using that rifle on me." –Sam defiantly stated her ground when one of their people rose his rifle and pointed it at her; she didn't move.

\- "Get out of the way, Grounder."

\- "You're gonna have to shoot me."

The guy approached Sam ready to shoot her without anyone doing anything. I looked incredulously at Bellamy before I took the man down, a knife to his throat. Everyone raised their weapons except for Sam, Bellamy and Pike.

\- "Guns down!" –Pike rose his hands.

\- "Do what he says, now." –Bellamy turned to their people.

\- "So much for the good Grounder." –Monty's mom spoke.

\- "So much for the grownups, acting like they know what's going on but she's just a scared little mouse pointing a big gun at her son's friend." –Sam spoke cynically.

\- "Whose people are you defending here?" –Pike spoke to us.

\- "I'm defending my people and you're not one of them." –Sam steps closer to him, speaking before I can do it myself- "My people are the 100 kids you adults sent here to die for you, my people are all those who we saved from the Mountain, my people are those Grounders out there who are here to help us. You want to kill the real enemy here, Pike? Then I suggest shoot yourself and so do all these sheep following you."

\- "You don't mean that, Sam." –Bellamy addressed her directly for the first time in a long time.

\- "And how you know what I mean? You haven't spoken to me since you came back from Polis, hell, you can't even look at me!" –Sam laughed but it was empty as she moved in front of Bellamy- "I won't let you start another war."

\- "We're already at war."

\- "No, you're at war with yourself because you can't deal with not having been able to protect your people. You're at war with yourself because you don't know how to process your own feelings."

\- "You can't stop this."

\- "Watch me."

Bellamy rose his hand towards Sam but, before he could no anything, an alarm started blasting through the camp and a voice came through the PA calling every unstationed security personnel to the main gate. Soon, Octavia came next to us and, seeing the scene in front of her she questioned Bellamy in disbelief.

\- "What's wrong with you?"

Every guard now approached the gate with Kane and Abbie as Pike's people raised their weapons against them.

\- "Look at this, they're all just a bunch of scared little sheep."

Sam mustered getting away from Bellamy and moving next to Octavia as Pike told his people to stay calm and leave their guns on the ground; Kane came next to us and asked me to let go on the man and so I did.

\- "What the hell do you think you're doing?" –Abbie stood in front of Pike.

\- "What you didn't have the guts to do."

\- "The guts? Hold me before I slit his throat and hang his head on my wall."

\- "It'll be okay, Sam." –Octavia squeezed her arm.

\- "I'm not so sure."

The guards started to take every one of them to lock up per Abbie's request as the rest were asked to go back to their rooms, us included.

\- "It's over." –Abbie stated as Pike was taken back.

\- "Nothing is over." –Pike stood in front of her- "We are surrounded by warriors who want us dead."

\- "That's enough." –Kane approached him.

\- "No, not even close." –Pike yelled back at him- "Why don't you show us all what you let the Grounders do to you yesterday? Come on, Kane, I think that the people who are about to vote for you have a right to know."

\- "It's the mark of the Commander's coalition." –Kane raised his arm showing the symbol that every leader from each clan wore on their arm- "It means we are the 13th clan; it means we are in this fight together."

\- "No, it's what farmers used to do to their livestock."

\- "Right before the slaughterhouse." –Monty's mom yelled and Sam moved next to her.

\- "The only reason you're still alive is because I like Monty." –Sam threatened her.

\- "My son needs new friends."

\- "Then luckily you'll be dead soon."

\- "Sam..."

\- "What? Are we going to let that asshole destroy what we've built? What does he know about the Grounders? What does he know about their traditions and their ways? I'll tell you: nothing. He only knows the red of his blood and the fear in his heart. We've lived peacefully with the Grounders for three months before he showed up and no one was afraid, everyone was happy but now he shows up and tells you a few lies that he believes and you all defend him?"

\- "Samantha, stop."

\- "I won't stop until everyone comes back to their senses."

Everyone around us started murmuring: some agreed with Pike, wanted him to be the next chancellor and some agreed with Sam, knowing she was speaking the truth and there was nothing to fear. The guard resumed their duties and started to take them all back to the cells when something unexpected happened.

\- "Pike for Chancellor!"

Bellamy shouted and people started chanting with him; he didn't even look at us as he walked past us to lockup. Octavia held my hand as we both turned to Sam; you could see her brain was going everything that has just happened as she clenched her fitst.

\- "Sam, are you ok?"- I asked her.

\- "Lexa was right, love is weakness." –she takes in a deep breath- "I can't afford that right now."

\- "What do you mean?" –Octavia looks worriedly at her- "Are you talking about Bella..."

\- "Let's hope you don't have to find out, O." –Sam looked at Octavia- "Because if you do, that means your brother is dead."


	7. Gone.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pike becomes Chancellor in Arkadia and things will get worse by the second until they reach rock bottom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter while listening on repeat to _Gone_ by Ioanna Gika on Spotify.

**SAM'S POV**

I didn't sleep much that night after everything that had happened.  _They really added Pike's name to the election for Chancellor; I mean... did everyone go insane while I passed out?_  I let my thoughts wonder off as the first rays of sunlight appeared on the horizon.  _Bellamy... what happened?_  I felt tears on my eyes but I refused to let them run, quickly running my hands over my face and rising from the bed.  _I need to get out._  I didn't know where he had been spending the nights since I woke up and, at this point, I didn't care either.  _How can I convince him... show him how wrong Pike is if he won't even look at me. Maybe it was all a lie... what we had... maybe it was just me being in love with the idea of love..._  I shook my head trying to get rid of those intrusive thoughts as I made my way out of the Ark and towards Selene, mounting on her and moving towards the gate.

\- "Open."

\- "Where are you going?"

\- "I don't know."

\- "The vote's today, did you already submit your paper?"

\- "Yes."

\- "I'll sound a horn once it's done, in case you want to come back by then."

I nodded. I knew he was one of the few guards who didn't agree with Pike and that's the only reason I got out that morning. Selene and I moved around the forest for a while until we stumbled into the clearing where I trained with Ion and Sheda, finding the last one there.

\- "Sheda? What are you doing here?"

\- "What are you doing here?"

\- "I couldn't sleep, I needed to get out of there..." –I got down from Selene.

\- "Today's the vote for Chancellor, right?"

\- "Yeah and I'm afraid of what's going to happen."

\- "Wanna talk?"

\- "Last night... Pike took his people and Bellamy armed them; they wanted to get rid of the army somehow but we managed to stop them."

\- "Bellamy?"

\- "He's not the guy you met all those months ago. I don't know him... it's not only he won't talk to me or that he didn't even react when I got a rifle to the chest..."

\- "What!?"

\- "I'm fine. It's just, he's not thinking, he's just letting Pike use him and boss him around and I can't even begin to process it. The Bellamy I loved would have never let anyone tell him what to do."

\- "Loved?"

\- "I can't love someone who wants to get my friends killed... Indra and Ion are in that army."

\- "I'm so sorry, Sam."

\- "Me too, Sheda, me too."

We stood there, sat on the ground with our backs resting on a tree and looking to the horizon for what seemed like hours until I heard a horn blow in the distance.

\- "It's done."

\- "What is done?"

\- "The vote. The guard that let me out this morning offered to sound a horn for me to know it was done. I have to go."

\- "What if Pike won? Won't he lock you up."

\- "He can try." –I rose from the ground- "I promise I'll be fine. If anything happens, I'll get out and find you."

\- "What if something happens to you?"

\- "Then kill Pike and his people, Octavia will help you distinguish them."

Sheda nodded before hugging me tightly to his chest and I smiled.

\- "I'm so grateful for you, Sheda kom Trikru."

\- "Me too, Samantha kom Skaikru." –he smiled as I got on Selene.

\- "If Pike won, I'm not Skaikru anymore."

\- "We'll take you in Trikru."

\- "It'd be an honor."

Selene and I got to Arkadia as fast as we could as the doors opened, but not for me. I got down from Selene as the guard from before came next to me with a sorrowful look on his face.  _He won; these idiots really voted him Chancellor._

\- "Besnik." –Pike greeted me and I swear I felt my blood burning my skin- "Welcome back."

\- "I don't feel so welcome here anymore."

\- "Where were you?"

\- "Why do you care?"

\- "She was with the Grounders." –Bellamy spoke next to Pike and he looked at me unsure.

\- "Where you?"

\- "No, I didn't go to any meeting with any Grounder. If you care to know, I went for a ride with Selene, she needs the exercise and I couldn't sleep. You can check her legs and my boots, I didn't get down from her."

Pike looked at me unsure but seemed to buy it since Selene was covered in mud.  _Thank the Gods we went through the mire and Sheda was at the clearing._

\- "Well, since you just came in, it's my duty to inform you of the results." –Pike looked at me satisfied- "I am the new Chancellor." –I didn't move.

\- "Aren't you going to congratulate him?"

\- "You want me to kneel too?" –I cynically answered Monty's mother.

\- "That won't be necessary."

\- "I wasn't going to." –I eyed him and his people- "Where are you going all geared up and on foot?"

\- "To finish what we started yesterday."

Pike informed me and his people cheered as they started to move following him outside the camp. I moved fast enough to hold Bellamy back as he didn't quite resist.

\- "Bellamy, those are my friends out there." –he finally looked at me- "Ion is there, Indra is there. Are you gonna kill them?"

\- "They are Grounders."

\- "So just because they didn't fall from the sky like you, they are a threat now?"

\- "They've always been a threat. We need to get that taken care of like Pike says."

\- "Think about what you're going to do because their protection is not the only thing that's on the stakes. Listen to your gut, not your head because that's full of Pike's shit."

\- "What are you trying to say?" –he turned fully to face me.

\- "They are not our enemies. If someone needs to die, it's Pike."

\- "Sam, shut up before someone hears you."

\- "You are hearing me."

\- "They'll lock you up."

\- "Been there, done that."

\- "Bellamy, time to go." –Pike called him from outside.

\- "I have to go." –he mustered as he turned around.

\- "You don't have to. You're just willing to do as he says because you're lost and somewhere along the way, you stopped trusting me."

\- "How can you say that? I'm still in love with you, Sam."

\- "You're in love with me?" -I scoffed, mostly shocked those words fell from his mouth at this point, it felt fake- "You haven't looked at me since you came back from Polis, you weren't there when I got the clear from Abbie and this is the longest conversation we've had in weeks and, what's worse, you don't trust me. So, I'd say you have a funny way of 'being in love'." –I even air-quoted for him.

\- "Bellamy, let's go!"

\- "I have to go."

He moved away from me and that's when I realized no one else was doing anything.

**JASPER'S POV**

Sam had just come in and tried to get Bellamy back to his senses but nothing seemed to work. I had moved to pet Selene and move her out of there in case anything happened when Sam yelled at the crowd in front of the door.

\- "Is no one going to do anything?" –she looked around her. Kane, Abbie and even Monty where there but no one moved- "I'll do it myself."

\- "Samantha, no."

\- "You can't give me orders, Kane."

Kane nodded to the guard behind Sam and he pulled her inside as she struggled to get free, being successful right before another guard came to the first one's aid.

\- "I have to go, let me go!"

\- "Sam, he'll kill you." –Monty quickly moved closer to her.

\- "He'll kill them! I can't just stay back and watch as Pike and your mother kill my friends just because they landed in bully territory. We've been over this, we survived..."

\- "He's the Chancellor now." –Abbie cut her off, now back next to her.

\- "Then I have to kill the Chancellor."

Abbie nodded at the guards holding Sam back and I knew what was going to happen next. They held Sam still as she kept resisting so their held on her got tighter until she couldn't move; Abbie approached her with a cloth covering her mouth and nose and, soon after, Sam had passed out as a tear fell down her cheek.  _What happened to us?_  They took her to the Medical Centre until she woke up and I went to keep her company as soon as I took care of Selene. I liked the horse, she seemed to understand.

**SAM'S POV**

I woke up with a headache, unable to put my finger on what had happened.

\- "Ugh." –I sighed opening my eyes- "What the fuck happened now?"

\- "Oh, Sam!" –Jasper was sat next to me with a bottle of alcohol surprisingly un opened- "How are you feeling?"

\- "Not very well. What happened?"

\- "You may want to take a couple sips." –he handed me the bottle as I sat on the bed- "You remember coming in?"

\- "Yeah... I tried to convince those assholes to stay back but... and no one did anything." –I realized what had happened and took the bottle to my mouth, drinking a good chunk- "Abbie put me to sleep so I wouldn't do anything."

\- "She didn't want you to get hurt."

\- "I have to get out."

\- "They aren't back yet."

\- "That gives me time to prepare." –I handed him the bottle but he refused.

\- "You need that now more than I do." –he smiled softly- "I'm sorry about Bellamy."

\- "I'll be fine, I've learnt my lesson."

\- "You will be, you're the strongest person I know."

\- "Once this is all over, you and I are leaving this place. For good."

\- "I'd like that."

Jasper chuckled and helped me down from the bed, coming with me to my room to get my gear and my weapons –my Grounder weapons, that is. After that, we made our way to where Selene was and I hoped on her just as the guard at the entrance informed Pike and his people were back.

\- "Good luck, Sam."

\- "Be safe, J."

The door started to open at that moment and I knew I only had a chance to know what had happened out there. I saw O in the distance running up to Bellamy but he ignored her and kept walking; I sighed as I made Selene go and, as soon as Pike saw me he stood on the middle of the door.  _He's gonna have to try harder than that._

\- "Lock it up!" –he commanded to the guards- "Don't let her out."

He stood in the middle until the last second; seeing Selene and I had no intention of stopping, he jumped to the side and Selene and I made it easily outside for the door closed slowly. Before leaving, I turned around to see a shocked Pike raising from the ground next to Octavia and even Bellamy had come to the door now.

\- "Come inside, that's an order from your Chancellor."

\- "You want to stop me?" –I raised an eyebrow- "Then you're gonna have to shoot me, and make it a killer shot or I'll come back."

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

They had killed them, the 300 hundred warriors sent to help us and Bellamy didn't have any traces of remorse in him as I walked up to him and he told me he was fine. At that moment, Sam had managed to get out of the camp, leaving an angry Pike on the ground as I tried to fight the smile back.

\- "She's going to be a problem." –Pike rose with Bellamy's help.

\- "She won't, I'll take care of it."

\- "I have a better idea."

I turned to face Bellamy as his tone wasn't one I was used to hear when he spoke about Sam.  _He won't hurt her, he loves her; he may be acting insane but he'd do anything for her._  I tried to calm my mind as Pike got on a couple boxes and spoke to the crowd that had formed around us.

\- "Listen up." –he started- "Twenty-four hours ago, you elected me your Chancellor; every action I've taken since, and every action I will take, will be to achieve one sacred goal: the creation of a self-sustaining, prosperous and safe Arkadia." –everyone chanted in agreement and I was glad Sam had left- "This morning, on a muddy field, our people paid tribute to those who have been taken from us by sending a message to the Grounders. This land is ours now."

I turned to face Lincoln as Pike kept rambling. _Indra... I hope Sam'll make it and maybe...maybe she'll still be alive._

\- "Resist and you will be met by force; fight and you will be greeted by death."

Everyone chanted as Pike made eye contact with Lincoln and me.

\- "And the first thing we do, is set example." –he pointed at one of the guards that guarded the door- "Take her down."

\- "No!" –I yelled as Lincoln held me back.

\- "Sir, with all due respect, I don't think that's necessary." –Bellamy finally spoke and I felt hope for a second.

\- "Samantha Besnik will be an example for everyone in here and a warning for the Grounders out there; no one is above the rules."

\- "Target confirmed, sir."

\- "She's just a kid!"

\- "Pike, you can't do that, that's an execution."

I looked at Bellamy whose eyes were now set on the ground as Abbie and Kane tried to reason but Pike almost laughed on their faces.

\- "Fire."

I heard the shot and the tears started pooling down my face as Lincoln hugged me, a few people gasped but most stood silent. Fear settled on the camp as the realization of the things Pike would do hit everyone.

\- "She's down, sir." –the guard confirmed- "She won't be a problem for us anymore."

\- "I will kill you!" –I shouted at Pike- "Why did you do that!"

\- "The rules are the rules, you ignore them, you suffer the consequences." –he simple answered me- "Today is a new beginning..." –he addressed the crowd again- "...mark it down, remember it just like the Grounders will remember it."

And with that, Pike left followed by a couple guards and his people who were still cheering for him and even a couple were glad Sam was dead, saying now she was one less Grounder to deal with. Abbie and Kane came next to us.

\- "Octavia, I'm so sorry."

\- "I want to go for her body."

\- "Pike will kill you too if you go out there."

\- "And what am I supposed to do? Let my sister's body root out there to be devoured by the animals?"

\- "I'll radio Indra to let her know." –Kane whispered.

\- "That won't cut it."

\- "Is there a problem?" –the guard that had opened the door for Pike and had shot Sam came to us and I was about to punch his face when Bellamy spoke.

\- "It's fine. I got this."

I looked at him in disbelief and Lincoln's hold on me got tighter as if he knew what I was thinking.

\- "You." –I looked up at him, he had tears in his eyes- "You're dead to me."

\- "O..."

\- "My sister is dead!" –I pushed him back- "The person you called 'the love of your life' is dead because you wouldn't listen to her, to us..." –tears started falling from my eyes as I kept pushing him- "Sam is dead and I can't even bury her because the person you've decided to put your trust on could kill me too."

\- "She made her choice." –he tried to touch me but I moved away.

\- "And, as always, she was right and you are still wrong. I hope this weighs down on you for the rest of your life." –I harshly spoke, wanting to hurt him- "You're going to wish you were dead once what has just happened sinks in. I don't know you anymore, she didn't either... but you know the what the most tragic part about all this is? She has died still in love with you and thinking you'd come around..." –I wiped the tears from my face with my hands- "I think this is the first time Sam's ever been wrong and I wish this was all a nightmare but now she's gone and..."

\- "O, I didn't want this, I was trying to protect you both."

\- "And how did that turn out for my sister, huh? Why don't you go take a look? Maybe then you'll realize what you've done!"

\- "O..."

\- "You've done enough, Bellamy." –Kane moved in front of me protectively, I was tired of fighting.

\- "I need to lay down."

Lincoln was quick to take me on his arms and follow Abbie into the Medical Centre.  _She's gone; she really is gone this time. I will kill Pike. I will do you justice sister. May we meet again._

**BELLAMY’S POV**

After Octavia left with Lincoln in tears, I made my way towards Pike’s office.

\- “Sir.”

\- “Come in, Bellamy. We have to start planning our next move now.” –he turned his attention back to the map on the table.

\- “Sir, I’d like to go look for Sam’s body and pick it up, bring her back and bury her properly.”

\- “No.”

\- “But, sir…”

\- “Are you questioning my decisions?” –Pike eyed me as I didn’t answer- “I believe she meant something for the Grounders, some type of symbol but differently from Clarke.” –I nodded remembering Indra’s words the day we found him- “Let them find her, let her body be a message.”

\- “They’ll retaliate if they find the body with a shot in the back.”

\- “You think so? Grounders defending one of us?”

\- “Sam is… wasn’t one of us, sir.”

He nodded in agreement, although I was sure he didn’t understand what I meant; I didn’t mean she wasn’t Skaikru, I meant she wasn’t one of his people.

\- “I know how you felt about her, son, but we did what we had to do; you’ll forget about her and move on as soon as we start building our new lives here, completely independent from the Grounders.”

I knew he was right about the Grounders but he was so wrong about Sam. I excused myself and left him there to his thoughts as I walked around the ship; I ended face to face with the door of the room in which I had been sleeping with Sam.  _Our room._  I hadn’t been there since I came back from Polis; I had been sleeping somewhere else, unable to face Sam, knowing what happened at Mountain was my fault.  _I was so afraid I could have lost her that day, and now…_ I felt the tears finally form in my eyes as I opened the door and all the memories came back; it was too much. I locked the door behind me and rested my back against it as I let my eyes wander around the room: the bed was made and had a box opened in it. I walked up to the box and looked inside.  _She geared up before she left._  All her knives were gone as well as the vest Sheda had given her to carry them.  _She left ready to fight but… she didn’t stand a chance being shot from the back. Treason. That’s what a shot from the back represents. Or cowardice._  I sat on the bed and rested my head against the pillow, feeling a lump under it; I rose my head and moved the pillow finding a folded t-shirt under it.  _My t-shirt_. I took it and rested my head back on the pillow.  _She used to sleep in it, she said she liked having double of me._  I laughed at the memory before the tears started to fall from my eyes. I moved it towards my nose and smelled it; it smelled like her now. That was it, despair settled on my brain and guilt in my heart and as the first tear fell from my eyes, I was unable to stop them.

 _I’ve finally got her killed. I’ve finally lost her because I wasn’t brave enough to stand up for her, to save her. I was never good for her, I’ve always hurt her, some way or another and this is how it ends. What am I going to do without you, Sam? I love you, I still do even if I didn’t show it._  I turned around on the bed and through the tears I distinguished a half-empty bottle of alcohol that I knew didn’t belong there but I didn’t think it twice: I rose to sit on the bed, took off my boots and took the bottle with me; I started drinking in between sobs, emptying the bottle in no time, feeling more broken and alone as the time passed and I could only think of her.

_She was so strong, so brave and what am I? A monster, I only hurt the people I love… her blood is on my hands and I’ll never be able to wash it off. I’ll never be able to trust anyone like I trust her, to care for someone like I care for her, to love like I love her… I should have stayed away from her, maybe now she’d still be alive, she’d found someone better for her, someone deserving of her; but I’ve ruined it all. I’ve killed my better half… I’ve killed Sam._


	8. A lousy shot.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam’s alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: original character's death.

******SAM'S POV**

I was almost at the forest when I heard it: a single shot in the distance and, before I could do anything, the bullet hit me in the shoulder making me fall from Selene.  _They shoot me. He really wants me dead, doesn't he?_  There were no more shots as I lied there on the mud, Selene licking my hands until I told her to leave.  _They think me dead, now that's just kinda offensive._  I waited until the shadows covered me to move towards the forest, finding Selene drinking water from a puddle.  _It could have been worse, they could have hit her._  My arm felt numb from the fall so I struggled a bit to get on Selene, but soon enough after making a somewhat decent tourniquet on my shoulder and with her help, we started to make our way towards where the army was supposed to be. There was still some light when I got there and I quickly distinguished a familiar face on the ground.

\- "Indra!" –I yelled getting down from Selene- "Indra! I'm coming!"

\- "Samantha?" –she opened her eyes slowly to focus her gaze on me, she had been shot on the shoulder and was bleeding.

\- "I'm so sorry, Indra. I tried..." –I started making a tourniquet- "I really tried but they wouldn't listen and..."

\- "Your people did this." -her voice was cold and showed the hatred she felt inside.

\- "I know who did this, Indra; those were not my people, you are." –then something clicked...  _oh no_ \- "Ion." –I whispered- "Indra, where's Ion..."

\- "He was at the guard's post on the other side of our camp."

\- "We're going to find him." –I stated and whistled for Selene to come- "I'm going to take you out of here and to Polis."

\- "If they learn of this, they'll kill you."

\- "I'll take my chances. I know I fell from the sky, but I'm not Skaikru anymore."

Indra nodded as I offered her my hand to raise from the mud; Selene laid on the ground, making it easier for Indra to get on her before we started to make our way towards where Ion was supposed to be. I started screaming for him as we looked for more survivors but no one answered and I feared the worst. A hand suddenly was raised in the distance and I ran up to it followed by my companions.  _No._

\- "Ion!" –I screamed falling to my knees next to him- "Not you, please."

\- "Sam?"

\- "It's me." –a tear fell down my face as I held his head on my lap- "I got you, you're okay."

\- "Sam..."

\- "No, don't speak." –I scanned his body finding a bullet wound on his stomach- "I'm so sorry for this but... we'll fix it, you'll see." –I placed my hands over his wound to put some pressure- "We'll get you all fixed up and then we'll go back to training and maybe you can finally show me the ocean and some more moves to knock out Sheda, huh?" –I smiled as another tear started rolling down my face- "What do you say?"

\- "I'm not making it, Sam."

\- "Don't say that, please."

\- "I'm sorry I couldn't help you more."

\- "Ion, You've done so much for me..."

\- "I'm cold."

The realization of the wretched scene in front of me hit me as he spoke; he was right, he wasn't going to make it. I took off my jacket and covered his body with it, feeling incredibly incompetent.

\- "Any better?"

\- "Yeah." –he whispered taking my hand in his- "Thank you for coming."

\- "Whenever you need me, wherever you are, I promised you I'd be there."

\- "You're a good warrior Sam, but most importantly, you're a good person, a good friend... don't forget that."

\- "I'm sorry I couldn't save you. This is my fault."

\- "No, Sam, I chose to come here of my own will. I die happy we got to meet, only regretting not being able to spend more time with you, to show Skaikru we are the same."

Tears were now cascading down my cheeks like a river and falling over his bloody armor.

\- "May we meet again, Sam kom Trikru."

\- "I love you, Ion kom Trikru. I will make this right, I will avenge you and we will meet again."

\- "I'm tired." –Ion's breath became slower by the second- "Don't leave me."

\- "Don't worry, I got you, I'm not leaving you, ever."

He smiled softly and squeezed my hand one last time. I swore I heard him mutter an almost inaudible "Ai hod yu in" or something similar before his face fell to the side and his body went limp. I felt a hand on my shoulder: Indra.

\- "We should go."

\- "I can't leave him here... I have to bury him, burn his body... a proper warrior's ceremony... I..."

\- "We will, with the help of our people." –I gave her my best questioning look- "Ion and Oreth both thought you belonged to Trikru and so do I and the Commander." –she offered me her good arm- "We'll come back for them."

I nodded before kissing Ion's forehead and letting his head back on the ground, covering now his face and torso with my jacket. I took Indra's hand but rose on my own not to hurt her and wiped the tears from my face as we walked back to Selene. I had no idea how Indra got down from Selene and I didn't question it as we moved away from there: she on Selene as I took the reins on my hand and started walking away from the massacre.  _I'll make this right._

\- "Samantha, you're bleeding."

\- "Yeah, they shot me."

\- "Who?"

\- "Skaikru." –I faced her for a second- "I guess they think me dead now."

\- "I'm so..."

\- "Don't be, this only makes things easier."

We kept moving in silence when I heard horses and voices in the distance.  _Well, maybe Indra will get help sooner than expected._

\- "Heda." –Indra whispered surprised.

\- "Indra!" –I heard Lexa's voice before I saw her.

\- "Selene, down."

Selene did as I asked and lowered down so that I could help Indra down from her; Lexa got to us followed by a couple guards and Clarke.

\- "Samantha."

\- "Sam? What are you..."

\- "Help Indra, now."

I demanded as I helped Indra sit on the ground with her back to a tree; Clarke was soon kneeled next to her and started helping her with a little bit of resistance from Indra's part. I felt eyes on me and I turned around.

\- "Sheda!" –I almost cried out in happiness.

\- "Sam, what happened here?" –he hugged me and I grunted in pain- "You're bleeding." –he looked into my eyes- "Who did you this?"

\- "The same people that did this."

\- "Indra, what happened here?" –Lexa asked Indra.

\- "They attacked while we slept; our watch was to the north, looking for Azgeda. They killed our archers first, our infantry couldn't get close, then... they executed the wounded."

\- "The summit was two days ago." -Clarke spoke as she put pressure on Indra's wound- "How could Kane do this?"

\- "It wasn't Kane." –Indra answered and looked at me.

\- "It was Pike, Clarke. He won the stupid Chancellor election."

\- "How? He wasn't even on the valet."

\- "Bellamy..." –I took a deep breath to calm myself- "He made it happen, he's on Pike's side." –I felt Sheda's hand squeezing my shoulder- "Pike's first great idea was to end Indra's army because, according to him, they were going to kill us all."

\- "But..."

\- "Clarke, listen, I'm not done." –I sighed- "I tried to explain that Trikru is not Azgeda; hell! I tried to explain that not all the clans are Azgeda but no, why would mighty stupid Pike listen." –I felt the rage burning my throat.

\- "That doesn't explain why you're bleeding, Sam." –Sheda stated but I knew it was really a question.

\- "Once they came back, I took off out of there. I knew Indra and Ion were here and I thought... I thought I could find them and help them..." -I shut my eyes in an attempt to keep the tears from falling again- "As I was almost at the tree line, I heard a shot and then I felt the impact of the bullet, I laid there on the ground waiting for another shot but there wasn't; whoever shot me thought they did a good job with one bullet."

\- "Your people shot you?" –Lexa faced me, she looked like she didn't understand what I was saying.

\- "Those are not my people, Heda." –I looked at her- "My people are the Grounders, my people is Indra, my people is Sheda, my people is you. There's not many people I care about in that camp so I only ask before you retaliate, because I really hope you will, don't hurt any of the 100, the kids are on our side as well as Lincoln."

\- "And the rest? The ones who do follow Pike."

\- "You can kill them all as far as I'm concerned."

\- "And Bellamy?"

\- "If he hasn't changed his mind... he was here, he shot these people..."

\- "He saved me." –Indra cut me off and I looked at her in shock.

\- "He did what?"

\- "They were executing the wounded; he approached me..."

I felt the tears in my eyes once more, but not from pain, rather from rage.

\- "This wouldn't have happened if he hadn't chanted Pike's name before the vote." –I cut Indra almost yelling- "Ion is dead because he managed to get Pike in charge, this is his fault."

\- "Sam..."

\- "No Clarke, you haven't seen him. He's not the guy from the dropship or from Mount Weather; something's changed him..."

\- "Samantha, Bellamy was part of this but he tried to help, he wanted to spare the wounded but the rest didn't listen. He convinced Pike to let me live so I could deliver a message."

\- "What message?" –Clarke was quick to ask.

\- "Skaikru rejects the coalition; this is their land now. We can leave or we can die."

\- "Send riders." –Lexa turned to her guards as she rose from the ground, fury emanating from her words- "I call upon the armies of the Twelve Clans. In a day's time, we lay waste to Arkadia and everyone within its walls with the exception of Samantha's allies."

\- "Sha, Heda."

Lexa looked at me and I nodded pleased with how things were turning out.

\- "Wait, give me time to fix this."

\- "Hold em op!" –Lexa was quick to demand the remaining guards as she looked at Clarke. [Stop her!]

\- "What are you doing?" –Clarke turned to face her.

\- "I can't let you leave, Clarke."

\- "So I'm a prisoner now? Just like that?"

\- "Yes."

\- "Lexa, let me go to Arkadia."

\- "No."

\- "At least let me talk to Kane, we can bring him here."

\- "And for what Clarke?" –I faced her- "You can't stop Pike by talking, believe me, I've tried. The only way is to kill him."

\- "There must be something Kane can do."

\- "You think so? Then why did no one come out of Arkadia to find my body and bury me?" –she remained silent- "I'll tell you why, because it's Pike's law now, you question him..." –I pointed at my wound- "...you bleed."

\- "We can try, plan something in between all of us."

\- "I know you want to believe you can save them, but it's too late; they made their choice and if Heda's army doesn't kill them, I'll do it myself, one by one until I get to Pike."

\- "I have to try."

\- "I know... you always do."

Clarke turned to speak with Indra as I stood there with Lexa and the two guards as Sheda walked up to us.

\- "You need to get that bullet out, Sam." –Sheda looked worried and I felt like someone actually cared for me.

\- "Ion..." –I spoke but my voice broke- "He died in my arms... I tried to save him but he had lost a lot of blood and I don't know for how long he was like that, it's my fault... I should have killed Pike the first day I saw him."

\- "Sam..."

\- "Can we bury him?" –I looked at him before turning to Lexa- "Give him a proper funeral?"

\- "Everyone here will have a warrior's funeral, Samantha."

\- "I know but..." –I wondered off and Lexa seemed to catch on.

\- "Go, but first let Clarke heal your arm; you'll need it if you want to join us."

\- "Thank you, Heda."

I went inside the tent that had been quickly built for us to stay the night and sat down so that Clarke could take the bullet out from my body after she took care of Indra.

\- "This will hurt."

\- "Just make sure I can still move my arm and I'll be fine."

\- "Sam..."

\- "I'm fine, I'm numb at this point."

\- "Can I ask you something?" –she questioned before starting to dig on my arm for the bullet.

\- "Sure."

\- "Bellamy and you?"

\- "We did get together after Mount Weather but right now... Octavia and Lincoln are my only family. I don't know who that guy that looks exactly like Bellamy is but... that's not the guy I stupidly fell in love with."

\- "What do you mean?"

\- "I know something's wrong with him but I can't figure out what the fuck it is. I tried everything to help him but he wouldn't speak to me, he can't even look at me, Clarke... it's like I disgust him."

\- "That doesn't sound like Bellamy."

\- "Nothing of what's been happening sounds like him yet... there he is, Pike's right hand."

\- "I'm sorry Sam... I could see the way you looked at him and how he looked at you and..."

\- "Don't be, it's not your fault. As it always turns out, it was probably something I did but... right now? I'm too numb to even care. I saw Ion die on my arms today and you know what he told me?" –she shook her head no- "That he was sorry he couldn't spend more time with me. He didn't say anything about how Skaikru did this or how he wanted revenge, no... he was only melancholic for the life he wasn't going to be able to live, and that really got me; Pike took his life because he's a coward and I'm going to make sure he regrets the day he pulled me off that Rover through the hatch."

\- "What are you going to do?"

\- "I will get revenge. Ion deserved this life more than me and yet I'm the one still breathing. I'll kill everyone by Pike's side and then I'll kill him slowly so that he feels the pain of 300 lives and more; that's my plan."

\- "That's torture, Sam; you can't..." –Clarke tried to convince me out of it as she closed my wound and cleaned her hands.

\- "And yet, he won't feel half of what I've suffered."

**BELLAMY'S POV**

I woke up with a banging headache to a couple knocks on the door that seemed to intensify the longer it took me to open it. For a moment, I felt it was all a dream and Sam had woken up earlier than me and had left to train with Sheda and Ion but, as I opened the door, it hit me.

\- "Well, if it isn't my favorite 'loved one's murderer', I don't know who this is. You look horrible, dude."

Jasper was at the other side of the door looking terrible, red and puffy eyes and a half-empty bottle of alcohol in hand. He even air-quoted the words for me so that I remembered I had killed Maya and I had killed Sam.

\- "What do you want?"

\- "Your boss is looking for you and I offered to help."

\- "Why?"

\- "I wanted to make sure you remembered."

\- "Remembered what?"

\- "That Sam's dead."

And with that, he left me there, hanging to the door's frame for support as my headache only got worse and my head spun in circles, but I had to meet Pike. I went back inside and looked in the mirror; I wasn't looking any better than Jasper and I had to fix it; Pike couldn't see me like that. After a lot of work and a change of clothes I found in the room next to Sam's, almost causing me another breakdown, I went to Pike's office. He was having a meeting to talk about our next steps towards an independent and secure Arkadia.

\- "A 15-kilometer perimeter around Arkadia should be sufficient."

\- "15 kilometers?" –I questioned trying not to sound too hoarse- "Sir, there's a Grounder village."

\- "Which will no doubt be the staging area for a retaliatory attack. Clearing it will be our first order of business; what's the location of the village?"

\- "Clear the village?" –I looked at him, starting to think he was going too far.

He eyed me and asked the rest to leave us alone to speak as I kept going over his words in my head.  _Maybe..._

\- "Thought you might like this back." –Pike broke my train of thought as he held my guard jacket in front of me- "Do you have something to say to me?" –he left the jacket on the table as I didn't take it.

\- "We went too far."

\- "I know it seems harsh, but we don't leave survivors; we don't have the medical supplies to treat their people and we can't risk them coming back to kill us."

 _They wouldn't come after us if you hadn't killed them._  Sam's voice echoed through my own thoughts.

\- "And Sam?" –I don't know where I found the courage or the voice to ask the question that had been haunting me, but I did it anyway.

\- "She didn't understand what we are trying to do; you know I tried to show her but Besnik was gone even before you met her, son." –he argued and I understood he meant the days back in the Ark- "We've all learned pretty quickly that war causes us to do things that we'll spend the rest of our lives trying to forget." -he sighed- "The only advice I can give you is to think about the lives we've saved, not the ones that were lost. Can you do that?"

\- "Yes, sir."

He smiled, happy with my answer and taking back the jacket from the table; he put it in front of me again and, this time, I took it.  _Maybe I couldn't save Sam, but I'll save the rest of us._  I put on the jacket as I made my way out of the room, finding Kane and Lincoln waiting just outside the door.

\- "He's ready for you."

\- "What the hell happened out there?" –Kane looked devastated.

\- "We did what we had to do."

\- "Wake up!" –Kane pushed me back- "You attacked an army that was here to help us, you murdered innocent people... is that who you are now? You thought you couldn't live with yourself after Mount Weather? Well, you just started a war that will kill us all."

\- "You need to wake up." –I answered him- "Don't tell me there's a difference between Azgeda and Trikru; Trikru killed 37 of my friends before you even touched the ground. We didn't start anything, they did."

\- "They?" –Lincoln approached me.

\- "You know what I meant?"

\- "I used to." –he stood right in front of me- "You look good for someone that has lost a loved one less than 24 hours ago."

\- "I tried to save her but she was already gone."

\- "If that's what you have to tell yourself to sleep at night..." –he turned to enter Pike's office but looked at me one last time- "Trikru didn't execute Sam. You did."

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

I followed Kane's indications and got out of Arkadia without been seen to meet with Indra.  _At least someone I love is still alive._  My thoughts wandered to Sam.  _Maybe I could go look for her body once its dark enough for the guards to see, maybe Indra, Ion, and Sheda could help me._  Soon, I was at the clearing where the army had once stood tall but was now just composed of hundreds of bodies starting to rot; in the distance, I saw a tent where I assumed Indra would be.

\- "Octavia?" –Clarke asked surprised to see me- "Where's Kane?"

\- "He sent me." –I entered the tent and kneeled next to Indra- "Indra, thank God."

\- "Your people voted for this?" –Lexa asked me with hatred in her voice.

\- "No, I've told you I don't believe that, Lexa."

\- "How'd you know, Clarke? You haven't been here." –I felt all my pent-up emotions from the last days starting to surface.

\- "Listen to me, the Grounder army is going to be here in less than a day. I need to talk with Bellamy."

\- "Bellamy was a part of this; he's with Pike. Bellamy's with the guy that got Sam executed and he didn't even dare to stand up against him. What makes you think he'll help us?"

\- "Yeah, Clarke, for the thousand time and coming from someone different so that maybe you'll listen this time since you never listen to a word I say, answer my sister. Why would Pike's second help us?"

The tent's flap opened as the voice hit my ears and revealed the person I loved more than anyone right now and whom I'd been mourning for the past day. I was in such shock I couldn't even move as I looked at her, cleaning her bloody hands on a cloth and with a bandage around her left shoulder that could be seen under the big jacked she was wearing and that I knew was not hers.

\- "Sam!" –I finally reacted crying in happiness- "You... how..."

\- "I know, O. I'm glad to see you're still alive under that dictatorship." –Sam opened her arms for me as I run up to her and hugged her, spilling my happy tears on her t-shirt- "I love you."

\- "Everyone on camp thinks you're dead."

\- "That could be an advantage."

\- "We've been mourning you, I..." –I broke the hug to look at her.

\- "It wouldn't be the first time now, would it?" –she smiled but it wasn't a happy smile.

\- "Now I truly I'm going to believe you can't die, wait until Jasper sees you!"

\- "Oh, no." –she laughed- "I can die, I'm just very stubborn and I have to do a couple things before I leave this planet."

\- "How...?"

\- "The guard is a lousy shot, he should have pointed a little lower if he wanted to hit my heart." –she pointed at her wounded shoulder- "I'll have to show him how it's done." –she smiled cruelly.

\- "Don't ever do that to me again, Sam."

\- "It wasn't me but alright, I promise." –she held her hand up- "I would have told you but there was no way I could get in there without actually getting killed this time."

\- "There's a secret passage, it's how I got out."

\- "I could use it to kill Pike."

\- "Impossible, he's always got company, Bellamy most of the time."

\- "Then he's gonna have to choose for good. I love your brother but he is really getting on my nerves... if he hadn't chanted for Pike, Ion would still be alive..."

"Sam, I'm sorry..."

\- "If what you're saying is true..." –Clarke interrupted our conversation- "... that means Pike trusts him. If I can get to him, he can get to Pike."

\- "Oh, please, go ahead. He hasn't listened to me or Octavia since Pike arrived but sure, why not try?" –Sam spoke cynically but I knew there was something else there- "I wouldn't be surprised if he actually came to his senses once he sees you."

\- "What's that supposed to mean?" –Clarke asked her confused.

\- "Nothing." –Sam brushed it off as she placed her arms inside the jacket she had been carrying on her shoulders- "I don't intend on letting what's happen here go. You try to convince Bellamy; if that fails, I'll go for Pike and if that fails too..." –she turned to Lexa- "You wipe that camp out."


	9. A manipulation game.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke goes back to Arkadia to try to convince Bellamy to help her while Sam stays back and opens up to Sheda.

**BELLAMY'S POV**

As I was guarding lockup while the prisoners were taken inside, Octavia appeared out of nowhere calling for Lincoln.

\- "I'm okay, don't fight this."

\- "He's right." –I pushed her back.

\- "Lincoln, what the hell is going on?"

\- "We're interning the Grounders." –I answered her and she turned to face me- "Lincoln's here because of a disturbance in the Medical Centre."

\- "What's happening to you?"

\- "Octavia..."

\- "I saw what you and Pike did to Lexa's army. Bellamy, you killed everyone!" –she started yelling at me, catching the attention of the other guards.

\- "Keep your voice down."

\- "What's wrong? You're not proud of massacring an army that was here to help us? You're not proud of taking orders from the man that got my sister killed?" –she had lowered her tone and her voice broke when talking about Sam.

\- "We're not doing this here."

\- "Good, then let's go because I'm not even close to done."

She looked at me with rage in her eyes, waiting for my move, so I pulled her with me through one of the hallways but she got rid of me to look at Lincoln one more time before we started walking together.

\- "You need to be careful, O. If you keep this up I won't be able to protect you."

\- "Thanks for the warning." -she mocked me.

\- "I'm serious."

\- "Me too." –she stopped walking for a second, looking at me up and down- "We all know how good you protected Sam."

\- "She should have stopped playing Grounder and you should too."

\- "Are you hearing yourself? Do you even love her?"

\- "You know I did, O." –she raised an eyebrow at me.

\- "Did."

\- "Yes, she's dead and we have to move on. You have to accept that, she's not coming back this time as much as I want to believe she'll walk through those doors and I'll be able to kiss her and hold her again..." –I trailed off before I realized what I was saying.

\- "She was shot because you put Pike on charge."

\- "The people voted for him."

\- "They voted for him because when Clarke's not here they trust you to make the right thing... joke's on them though, they should have listened to Sam for once."

\- "Stop talking about her!"

\- "Why? You can't handle being reminded of her? Do you feel guilty she died after everything we... you both went through?" –I looked at the floor as she opened the door- "We don't know you anymore and it seems you've never known us...you should've known we aren't playing Grounders. This is who we are now."

 _She's still talking about her as if she were here..._  I sighed and followed her inside the room that wasn't empty; I stood at the door looking at Clarke in disbelief before Octavia spoke again.

\- "Now I'm done."

And with that, she left closing the door after her.  _She set me up._

**CLARKE'S POV**

\- "Go easy on Octavia." –I smiled, happy to see him- "I had to beg her to get me into camp."

\- "What are you doing here, Clarke?" –he quickly cut me off, his tone harsh.

\- "We need to talk."

\- "You've decided that?" –he almost chuckled- "The might Wanheda, who chose the Grounders over her own people, who turned her back on us when we came to rescue you; now you want to talk?"

\- "I came here to tell you that the Ice Nation has paid a price, justice has been served for the attack on Mount Weather. I came here to tell you it's over."

\- "There it is again." –his tone was mocking and I wasn't sure what was going on with him- "Why do you get to decide it's over?"

\- "We did our part."

\- "We?"

\- "Lexa and I... The Ice Queen is dead. The problem was solved and then you let Pike ruin everything."

\- "Why are you here, Clarke?"

\- "Arkadia needs to make things right or Lexa and the Twelve Clans will wipe us out."

\- "Let her try."

\- "Please, tell me that going to war is not what you want."

I eyed him as I spoke, thinking of what Sam and Octavia had told me and starting to see this new side of Bellamy when I realized war as in fact what he wanted.

\- "We've been at war since we landed. At least Pike understands that."

\- "Pike is the problem."

\- "Now you sound like Sam."

\- "And she is..." –I cut myself remembering Sam was supposed to be dead- "...was right, Bellamy; this isn't who you are."

\- "You're wrong, she was wrong. This is who I've always been, I let you and Octavia and Sam and Kane convince me that we could trust these people and look where that got us! Sam's dead because she chose the Grounders over me, over us... And I won't let anyone else die for that mistake."

\- "The Grounders didn't kill Sam." –I reminded him, I could see in his eyes he was at war with himself, just like Sam said- "Bellamy, I need you and we don't have much time."

\- "You need me?"

\- "Yes, I do. I need the guy who wouldn't let me pull that lever at Mount Weather alone."

\- "You left me, you left everyone."

\- "I left you with Sam."

\- "Sam was a lot of things, Clarke, but she wasn't a leader."

\- "Bellamy..."

I tried to reason with him, this was bad, he had never spoken of Sam like this. He had always maintained Sam had it in her to be a leader, she just wasn't because she chose not to, because we were there.

\- "Enough, Clarke! You're not in charge here and that's a good thing because people die when you're in charge."

\- "Sam was shoot while you were in charge." –I spoke before I could stop the words from coming out, knowing that'd hurt him.

\- "It's not the same." –he shook his head- "You were willing to let a bomb drop on my family, then you made a deal with Lexa who left us in Mount Weather to die and forced us to kill everyone who helped us; people who trusted me!" –he ended with tears in his eyes.

\- "I just..." –I wandered off, not knowing what to say as the tears formed on my eyes too. I sat as he turned to face the door- "I'm sorry." –my voice broke and he finally turned to look at me- "I'm sorry for leaving, but I knew I could because they had you and Sam."

Everything I was saying was true, the day I left I did so because I knew Bellamy and Sam were a good team and in between the both of them, they'd make of Arkadia a safe and happy place to live for our people. But seeing how broken Bellamy was, I couldn't help but wonder what he felt that day; maybe he wanted me to stay. I remembered Sam's words "I wouldn't be surprised if he actually came to his senses once he sees you".  _Could she mean..._  Bellamy kneeled in front of me as I had let my head fall down trying to blink away the tears. He took my hand in his and, for a moment, I thought everything was going to be alright, Sam and Octavia were wrong, he was still the same guy...

\- "I know we can fix this."

\- "I'm sorry too."

With that, he handcuffed me to the table's leg as he rose up; I tried to get rid of the handcuffs but I couldn't.

\- "Hey. No, don't, no, Bellamy." –I begged him to stop- "Don't."

But he didn't even look back; he walked out the door and closed it leaving me there alone to my thoughts as I started crying.  _Sam was right._

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

After leaving Clarke and Bellamy to talk it out I decided to go back to Sam's room to find her some clothes since hers were covered in blood. Once I got them and hid them inside my own, I started walking through the ship when I heard Bellamy talking to another guard about taking Clarke to Pike.  _That idiot._

\- "Believe it or not, I'm doing this for your own good." –Bellamy was telling Clarke when they reached me.

\- "Believe it or not..." –I started as I knocked out the guard that was coming with him- "...I'm doing this for yours."

\- "You can't just hit a guard."

\- "I just did." –I glanced at Clarke- "Let her go."

\- "I can't do that."

\- "Sam would be ashamed of you." –I spat, I only wanted to hurt him now and it seemed to work.

\- "You need to stop using Sam against me, that's a low blow."

\- "They're coming." –Clarke whispered as footsteps started to be heard on the hallway.

\- "You should go."

Bellamy looked at me and for a moment I saw my brother back, but I knew it wasn't real; Clarke was quick to grab the guard's shook baton and hit Bellamy with it; he fell to the ground and Clarke started to look for the keys to her handcuffs as I hurried her.

\- "Let's go." –she started to move at the same time she got rid of the cuffs.

\- "Follow me."

We ran through the corridors until we got to the one where the secret passage was, finding there Kane and Abbie waiting for us. Clarke ran up to her mom and hugged her.

\- "We know what happened, we know what Pike did to the army." –Abbie spoke as she broke the hug- "Is there anything we can do to prevent retaliation?"

\- "Abbie, hurry." –Kane faced them as he opened the door to the passage.

\- "We came here for Pike."

\- "He's the duty elected Chancellor." –Kane turned to face me now- "Our people knew what they were voting for."

\- "Sam's death was also voted for?" –Clarke asked him.

\- "No." –Kane looked at the floor- "We tried to stop him but... he has the guns and the guards... we can't get close to him."

\- "And that's not the way we do things." –Abbie was quick to interfere.

\- "Maybe it's time we change the way we do things."

I looked at them and then at Clarke, remembering Sam's plan as I was sure Clarke was doing too. An alarm started sounding through the ship announcing a lockdown due to a security breach.  _That's us, we need to go._

\- "You two need to go, now." –Kane pointed at us.

\- "What about Lincoln?"

\- "You want to help him? Do it from the outside with this." –he handed me an earpiece- "The range isn't great so stay close and wait for me to contact you." –I nodded- "Now go."

**SAM'S POV**

I had agreed to stay behind this time, letting Clarke try to speak with Bellamy; although I was almost certain he wouldn't listen, a part of me kept wondering if it could be possible that he'd listen to her.  _I mean, it's not like he hasn't done it before. Am I jealous of Clarke?_  I shook my head.  _I'm being ridiculous, there hasn't been a time in which Bellamy chose her over me. But that could've been because she hasn't been there._  The two voices in my head kept going back and forth and I didn't know what to think anymore.  _You were just a rebound; Clarke left and you were second best. Oh, shut up. He was willing to let you go after Roan to try to save Clarke, even if he knew you'd die. He was only with you because he feels pity for you._  I rose from the rock I was sat at abruptly, angered at my own self for thinking that way.  _What I need is a distraction._

\- "You alright, Sam?" –Sheda's voice came from behind, making me jump in my place.

\- "You scared me."

\- "I'm sorry if I startled you, you rose so unexpectedly... I thought something happened."

\- "Yeah, my own toxic thoughts happened." –he looked at me questioningly- "Don't ask."

\- "You shouldn't be alone out here like this, you'll get sick."

\- "I'm fine." –I quickly answered suddenly able to feel the wind- "You're the one without a jacket."

\- "You need it more than me, I'm used to this weather."

\- "What makes you think I'm not?"

\- "You haven't been exactly living here all your life..." –he chuckled as I rolled my eyes- "Can I ask you something?"

\- "Sure."

\- "Did Ion die well?" –he looked at me- "Did he have a good death?"

\- "I don't believe you can have a 'good death', Sheda." –I sighed- "He bleed out, by the time I got there he was barely conscious." –then I remembered something- "He told me something in Trigedasleng that I didn't get."

\- "What was it?"

\- "Something like 'Ai hod yu in' I think."

\- "That means 'I love you'."

\- "Beautiful last words to say to the person that got him killed." –I looked to the horizon in front of me as a tear fell down my cheek, making me sigh.

\- "You didn't kill Ion."

\- "I know I didn't pull the trigger, Sheda, but his death will be with me until I die; and that's just life."

\- "He was so proud of you, he loved you so much, you were like his little sister."

\- "I wish we had had more time."

\- "Me too."

He put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me closer as I started to cry, everything I had been trying to avoid rushed to the surface and it was too much. Sheda only held me closer and rested his chin on my head.

\- "Em ste kei, yu na na kei." [It's okay, you'll be okay.]

We stood like that until it started to get dark and I had run out of salty water in my eyes, at least for the time being.

\- "Mochof, Sheda." –I thanked him as I broke apart from his embrace- "Gon ste der gon ai." [Thank you, Sheda, for being there for me.]

\- "Yu gon ai lukot, Sam. Dei ste chit a lukot dula op." [You are my friend, Sam. That's what friends do]

I smiled at him, a real genuine smile after all this time as I nodded; he rose from where we were sat and offered me his hand to stand up before we made our way back to the Commander's tent.

\- "Sam!"

\- "O?" –I turned towards the voice- "You're back! God, I'm so glad you're okay."

\- "Yeah, but that's it for the good news." –Clarke approached us behind Octavia.

\- "What happened?" –Sheda was quick to question.

\- "Bellamy... you were right, Sam. He tried to get me to Pike to lock me up, he wouldn't listen, he wants war."

\- "If he wants war, he'll find it."

\- "That's not the worst thing..." –Octavia spoke and I looked at her- "They have locked up every Grounder that was inside Arkadia, Lincoln included."

\- "We have to do something, Pike will kill them all as soon as he gets a chance." –I started walking faster towards the Commander's tent.

\- "You think he would?" –Sheda caught up with me.

\- "Are you asking me if I think Pike, the Grounder hater who got me killed because I disobeyed him even if I'm from the Sky like him, would kill a Grounder? Hell yes, he would, and everyone in there who opposes him for that matter."

\- "Bellamy wouldn't let him." –Clarke appeared next to Octavia.

\- "Bellamy let him kill me, Clarke." –I clenched my fists- "I don't know how it happened but if Bellamy were to do something I like to think he'd have done it the second Pike asked for the head of his lover and he clearly didn't. Wake up, Clarke, that Bellamy is not your co-leader... that's someone else."

\- "He tried to stop Pike." –Octavia whispered, looking at me.

\- "Not good enough, O; I got shot anyway." –I wanted to stay mad at Bellamy so that everything would be easier but Octavia had other plans.

\- "I have to talk with Lexa, now." -Clarke looked at me and nodded- "We can solve this."

\- "We need to talk, Sam." –O faced me.

\- "Fine. Clarke, go talk with Lexa; Sheda, go with her, I'll meet you later."

They both nodded in agreement and left Octavia and me alone in the middle of the clearing.

\- "I'd like to stay mad at Bellamy until we've solved this, O."

\- "Why?"

\- "Because everything would be easier that way."

\- "I agree, and I'm not telling you this to change your mind, I just think you should know."

\- "I'm listening."

\- "Bellamy really wanted to save you, Sam, and I was so angry I couldn't see how hurt my brother actually was. He asked Pike not to kill you but... well, you know Pike, he doesn't listen... he wanted to make an example of you and... I'm not sure about this, but I think he also wanted to get rid of you because he knows what you mean to Bell; if you were gone and Pike made Bellamy believe your death was on the Grounders, nothing could stop him... and I think that's where Bellamy's at right now."

\- "Should this make me feel any better? Because I'm only hearing Pike used me against Bellamy and that's only making me angrier."

\- "I spoke with Jasper the morning after you were shot."

\- "How's he? I need to let him know I'm alright but I don't want to put him in danger... knowledge is a powerful tool these days."

\- "He's devastated, he's been drinking more than usual and he's been blaming Bellamy for it all."

\- "I need to see him soon, I can't hurt him anymore. Jasper's suffered too much."

\- "The thing is... that morning he went to look for Bellamy and he found him in your room." –I furrowed my eyebrows- "He had slept there, Sam, in your room. Jasper told me he was looking even worse than him and, let me tell you, he wasn't looking good himself: red and puffy eyes, bags and under eye circles, his clothes all wrinkled. Jasper told me Bellamy stank like alcohol and looked like he had cried himself to sleep if he had slept at all." –I felt a tear ran down my face just by thinking of him in that state- "If you've ever had any doubts of his love for you, that should be your answer, he loves you so much, Sam; but he's lost."

\- "I'm just sorry I'm the cause of all his problems... I'm sorry I wasn't good enough for him... to help him get through whatever he was going through..."

\- "Don't do that."

\- "Do what?"

\- "Blame yourself for what Pike's done."

\- "I'm blaming myself for not being able to see how much of a wreck Bellamy was and going full-on threat mode on him, but he seemed so happy each time we were together..." –I sighed- "You're right, Pike's messing with Bellamy, he's taking advantage of his vulnerable state and his inability to deal with guilt..." –I clenched my fists- "Pike's going to regret the day he stepped foot in Arkadia and chose Bellamy to do his dirty job."

\- "So, you still love Bellamy?"

\- "You don't just switch a button and love disappears, O. It's not that simple. I think I'll always love your brother... even if we aren't together..." -Octavia gave me a sad look- "He's always been so good to me, he's always been there for me since we met and I can't help but think I just haven't been good enough... maybe, if I had seen how broken he really was, if I had realized sooner, Pike wouldn't be manipulating him like this. It breaks my heart that he can't see himself the way we... the way I do." -I smiled- "I know he's on the wrong side of this but I still love him; all I want is to save him from Pike and help him through whatever he's going through. Maybe I'm not the one for him, but I said it once and I'll say it again, your brother is the one for me, O, just like Lincoln is the one for you."

\- "Then let's go save them." -Octavia rose from the ground and offered me her hand.

\- "You got it, sister."


	10. Jusheda.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam visits Polis with Sheda for the first time and enjoys her time there until reality hits them back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Prob one of my faves I’ve written bc Sheda tbh)

**SAM'S POV**

After talking with Octavia, we both made it back to Lexa's tent, only to be met with a new decision: blood would not have blood. I knew what they were trying to do but just because the Twelve Clan's army wouldn't retaliate against Arkadia, it wouldn't mean the end of the war; that war could only end with Pike's dead. Since I was supposed to be dead myself, Sheda asked me to go back with him to Polis so that I could finally see how their life really was; Octavia agreed with him and promised to radio me if anything happened or if she needed me.

\- "You'll be safer in Polis, Sam."

\- "I don't wanna be safe, I want to take Pike down."

\- "We'll be in contact, I'll keep talking with Kane and, if anything changes, you'll be the first to know."

\- "But..."

\- "Sam, if anything happened and they saw you, Pike wouldn't let you get away this time and I'm not risking it, okay?"

\- "Fine." –I sighed- "But promise me you'll be safe."

\- "You too."

\- "You are legit sending me out with a nanny..." –I pointed at Sheda who was standing next to me- "...what you mean 'you too'?"

I laughed as Octavia pushed me back lightly before she started laughing with me. After saying goodbye to her, Sheda and I made our way to Lexa's tent to let her know I was coming with them and she agreed as Clarke was coming too. Sheda and I got on our horses and started to move back to Polis followed by the rest of the Grounders.

\- "I have something for you." –Sheda looked at me.

\- "I hope it's something nice or Selene and I are turning back." –I chuckled.

\- "Here."

He made his horse move closer to Selene as he extended his arm on my direction with his fist closed, I let go of Selene's reins and placed both my hands under his fist; once he opened it, a braided strand of hair dropped into my hands and I recognized it immediately.

\- "Ion."

\- "Before we tucked his body, I cut a piece for each of us... I thought you'd like to have it."

\- "Thank you, Sheda, really."

\- "I can add it to your own hair once we are in Polis."

\- "I'd love that."

I smiled, a solitary tear fell down my cheek as I put away the braid inside my vest to keep it safe.

\- "You're gonna love it there, Sam." –Sheda spoke again after a moment of silence- "There's so many different people and everyone has something to offer."

\- "Some good food would be nice to begin with if I'm honest."

\- "That's the first thing we'll do." -he smiled- "And, since you're staying with us, we'll have more time to train."

\- "You sure want to get your ass kicked."

\- "It'll eventually happen... I'm training you to be better than me."

\- "If that ever happens..." –I smiled- "...with whom will I train then, huh?"

\- "Don't get ahead of yourself, Sam." –Sheda chuckled- "I still have a few tricks up my sleeve."

\- "Oh, I'm sure you do."

Once we arrived at the city, it was settled that I was to stay with Sheda at his house instead of at the Tower with Clarke and Lexa. It wasn't really settled, I decided that myself after Sheda offered; I chose to stay with him because I felt more comfortable with him that surrounded by a bunch of guards at the Tower that only reminded me of my last days in Arkadia. Sheda's house was in one of the secondary streets of the city and it had a stable for his horse in which Selene was to stay. After we cooled and bathed our horses and made sure they both had enough water and food, Sheda chose to show me the city: the streets were packed with little stalls where the people were chatting, selling food, clothes, utensils... basically, anything you could ever need.  _This is so different from Arkadia..._

\- "Sheda! Yu laik bakon!" –a little girl came running towards us and jumped onto Sheda's arms. [Sheda! You're back!]

\- "Sha, Lila."

\- "Ai mema yu we, bro." [I miss you, brother.]

\- "Ai seintaim." – [Yo también] Sheda laughed as he put the girl back on the floor and squatted in front of her- "Disha ste ai lukot Sam." –he looked up at me and I smiled at her [This is my friend Sam].

\- "Kom Skaikru?" –she took a step back as if she feared me.

\- "Em slip daun kom skai, ba em laik Trikru nau." [She fell from the sky, but she is Trikru now].

\- "I've heard things about you." –she spoke to me now and I squatted to be eye-level with her- "Are you here to hurt us?"

\- "I only hurt bad people." –I smiled at her- "And there's no one bad here, but if you ever meet someone who is, come to me." –she nodded, satisfied with my answer- "Or if you are ever on trouble, alright?"

I winked at her and she chuckled; she nodded once more and then she moved next to Sheda and whispered something in his ear making him chuckle before she waved goodbye at us. I rose from the ground eyeing Sheda.

\- "What?"

\- "You were laughing, did she say something funny about me?"

\- "She said she likes you."

\- "Really?" –Sheda nodded at me- "Well, at least someone here does, look at me making friends now."

\- "Not everyone here hates you."

\- "I've seen the way they move from my way, I'm not blind."

\- "Some fear you, some respect you... and some move out because you're coming with me." –he smiled cockily.

\- "So you're pretty important here, huh?" –I raised an eyebrow at him.

\- "We both are."

\- "If you say so..." –my stomach started rumbling- "Where's the nice food you promised me?"

\- "Follow me."

The next ten days went by so fast, I could barely believe I had been at Polis for so long. I spoke every day with Octavia and, even if things were not getting better, at least Pike seemed to be done with the killing. I still thought of everyone back in Arkadia every day, but I knew there was nothing I could do, yet. Sheda and I spent practically all the time together unless Lexa asked for any of us, but that only happened twice: once to ask him how I was settling here, and the other to ask me what I thought of the city. We had each meal together, starting with breakfast at his house; then we'd get our horses out for some exercise and we'd train out of the city with all the weapons Sheda could think of, making me roll my eyes each time he chose a different one but that was just me trying to annoy him since I knew he only wanted me to be the best at everything so I followed along; after our morning training, we'd go back to Polis and take care of our horses before lunch; each day he took me to a different stall so I could try food from each clan and we'd decide then what to do with our afternoons; most times it was another training session and some others Lila -whom I learned was Sheda's younger sister and only family left- would come up to us and ask us to go for a walk with her or help her with some of her chores.

One day Lila even asked me for advice to fight someone bigger than her that was being mean; Sheda didn't like my antics but the next day Lila came to thank me because everything had worked out perfectly.

\- "I told you she'd be okay." –I rubbed my success on Sheda's face once Lila left.

\- "I didn't say she wouldn't be, I said my way was much more... politically correct."

\- "Yeah, sometimes words don't do much." –I smiled- "She'll be fine."

\- "How'd you know?"

\- "Cause she reminds me of myself... and I turned out just fine."

Sheda shook his head pretending to be annoyed but I could see the corners of his mouth turning up into a smile. At that moment, Clarke's face appeared in the crowd as she looked around her until her eyes landed on me.

\- "Sam, we need to talk."

\- "Please, tell me nothing bad happened at Arkadia." –I immediately rose from the table I was sat at with Sheda.

\- "Sheda, can you give us a moment?" –Sheda looked at me and agreed as I nodded at him- "Come with me."

I followed Clarke silently through the streets of Polis until we got to the tower and I couldn't hold it any longer.

\- "Can you tell me what's going on?"

\- "You have to see it."

\- "See what, Clarke?" –I asked her as we walked towards the elevator.

\- "Roan sent me a gift."

\- "What?" –I stopped dead on my tracks- "I am so confused right now."

\- "I need your opinion." –she entered the elevator.

\- "My opinion on a gift from the Ice King? Now, this is unexpected." –I followed her inside and laid my back on the wall opposite to the door- "So... is this a gift to start an alliance with them? Or just because he likes you? Maybe it's for Wanheda. Hold up, tell me it's not a wedding gift."

\- "A wedding gift?"

\- "Yeah, isn't that a thing? When you get married don't you make a gift to your fiancé?"

\- "Sam, I'm not getting married."

\- "Good, cause that'd just be a mess."

\- "Roan asked for you to see this too."

\- "Does Roan even know who I am?"

\- "Trust me, he does."

Once we got to the last level, Clarke got out first and made her way towards the throne room and, as she opened the door, I saw him: Emerson. I stood there, in front of the doors as everything started to make sense.

\- "Samantha, what a pleasure to see you're still alive."

\- "Yeah, it wouldn't be for lack of trying, trust me." –I stepped a little bit closer- "You're the reason Pike's doing all this right now, if you hadn't helped the Ice Queen, my people wouldn't be in danger."

\- "In my plan you weren't supposed to survive, that was a surprise for all of us."

\- "The Queen should've sent someone more skilled then." –I put the gag back in his mouth before I turned to Clarke- "Why is he here and why is he still alive?"

\- "Clarke has to decide his fate." –Titus entered the room- "He either dies or gets banished."

\- "And why isn't he dead yet." –I eyed Clarke- "This is a pretty simple choice, Clarke."

\- "It isn't."

\- "Yes, it is. So either you kill him or I will." –I took out one of my knives.

\- "Jusheda, no." –Titus approached me, stopping my hand and taking my knife away.

\- "Jusheda? Is that supposed to be me?" –I turned to face him with a funny look.

\- "Yes, it would be translated as 'The Commander of Blood', meaning you want blood, following our principle 'Jus drein, jus daun."

\- "Threatening enough, I'll take it." -I smiled, pleased- "Why did you stop me?"

\- "Although I agree with you, the choice is not yours to make." –he handed me back my knife- "He was delivered to Wanheda and she must be the one to choose his fate."

\- "Why did you really bring me here, Clarke?" –I turned to her- "This is not my choice and, even if it pains me, I know you've already chosen or he'd be dead by now."

\- "Roan wanted you to see him."

\- "Why?"

\- "I don't know but I wanted to know what you thought."

\- "Jus drein jus daun." –I turned to leave- "But they'll do whatever you say, Clarke, everyone always does."

And with that, I left the throne room. I wished she hadn't asked me to come.  _I mean, what was the point? She tried to hide it but I'm sure she's already made up her mind... then what was the point? Making sure I saw him... for what? Although, if she banishes him and I just happen to find him while I'm going on a walk... No, this is ridiculous, dealing with Pike right now is enough. Whatever happens to Emerson, he had it coming._

The next day, the ambassadors of the Twelve Clans got together in the throne room alongside with Lexa, Titus, and Clarke; Lexa invited me too since it was some type of celebration of her Ascension's Day anniversary so I accepted, staying at the very back of the room. That was the first time I saw the suitors to take Lexa's place when she passed out; it was no surprise they were all kids, but I still felt I could never follow them.  _Not that I have ever been good at taking orders but, taking them from a kid? Don't count me in._ As Lexa was speaking, the doors to the room opened, revealing a group of Grounders that claimed Titus had promised she'd listen to them today. As they entered the room I saw Octavia, they were pulling her with them as a prisoner.  _Someone is going to regret the day they put a foot in this tower._ As the leader, Semet, spoke to Lexa, I slowly moved to be directly behind them in case they tried something.

\- "Wigod ai op hashta min klin ona disha presh sintaim, Heda. Ai laik Semet kom Trikru en ai kom op hashta raitnes." –Semet spoke before bowing in front of Lexa. [Forgive me for intruding on this holy day, Heda. I am Semet kom Trikru and I come seeking justice.]

\- "Gouva yu klin." –Lexa addressed him, glancing at Octavia- "Chomouda yu don sis op Okteivia kom Skaikru gon honon?" [Explain yourself. Why do you hold Octavia kom Skaikru prisoner?]

\- "Em laik honon kom wor, Heda, don ge lid hir na sin in kripon-de kom omon kru." [She is a prisoner of war, Heda, brought here to bear witness to the crimes of her people.]

_Oh, great. What did Pike do now?_

\- "What crimes?" –Clarke moved from her place next to Lexa and towards Semet before addressing Titus- "What happened?"

\- "Skaikru attacked their village... because their warriors were lost when your people massacred the army we had sent to protect you, their village was defenseless."

\- "Beja, Heda. Ai beja yu daun. Goch osir klin." [Please, Heda. I beg you. Avenge us.]

After Semet spoke, the Grounders he had come with started chanting for blood, for the death of Skaikru, although I wasn't sure if they wanted every Skaikru dead or just the majority.

\- "Yu na spek daun ona disha wogeda!" –Titus rose his voice, ending the cheering among the Grounders. [You will show respect in this chamber!]

After that, Lexa left with Titus for a moment, probably to scold him for letting this happen and because she needed to make a choice. I stood still in my spot seeing as Clarke was keeping an eye on Octavia and I was certain they wouldn't touch her. Soon after, Lexa and Titus came back with a decision.

\- "I call on the army of the Twelve Clans to march on Arkadia." –Lexa spoke and everyone on the room chanted- "Not to attack, but to contain; we will blockade the 13th clan and keep them from the lands they wish to possess."

\- "You heard the Commander. Send riders, tell your armies to set up a buffer zone around Arkadia; 5 miles should be enough to keep them away from our villages." –Titus turned to Lexa- "What are their orders, Heda?"

\- "Any Skaikru caught across the line will be subject to a kill order."

_Well, now we do have a problem._

\- "Heda..." –Semet approached her- "I do not understand, how is this vengeance?"

\- "It is not vengeance, my brother, it is justice."

\- "Skaikru killed my sons and my brother and my wife!" –Semet was on the edge of losing it so I got ready for whatever he tried to do- "If the spirit of the Commander will not protect us then, what will?"

\- "You mind yourself, Semet."

Titus warned him but Semet didn't seem to care, he turned around yelling for the death of Lexa before turning to her with a sword that he never got to use as my own blade pierced his heart. He fell to the floor as everyone turned to face me, now aware of my presence.

\- "Samantha kom Skaikru just killed one of us!"

\- "I'm not Skaikru so mind your tongue before I cut it." –I faced her as I cleaned by blade on my sleeve before putting it away and walking up to Lexa- "I'm now part of Heda's army and I will protect her life with mine; Semet is dead because he threatened her and anyone else who tries will end up just like him."

\- "Sam... what are you doing here?" –Clarke moved closer to me.

\- "I've been listening and I have a proposition for the Twelve Clans that I think will satisfy us all."

\- "What is your plan, Samantha kom Trikru?"

Lexa looked at me as she spoke before looking at everyone on the room, to make sure they knew I was Trikru now and therefore the kill order didn't apply to me. Or at least that's what I chose to think.

\- "I say we bring you the hand behind the trigger, the mind behind the manipulation, the cause of all this blood spill and pain..." –I looked at each of the Clan Representatives to make sure they knew I was being serious- "We bring you Pike... and maybe a couple of his followers. You get rid of them as you please, of course. My personal choice would be to start with fire if you know where I'm going..." –I made a pause before I thought of how to end this- "Jus drein jus daun."

The Grounders were looking at me and soon enough they started talking among them when Clarke grabbed my arm, pulling me back so that I'd face her.

\- "What are you doing?" –she whispered-shouted.

\- "I'm getting rid of the problem."

\- "A couple of his followers?"

\- "I'll give them everyone that represent a problem."

\- "Are you going to give them Bellamy?"

\- "You know I'd never put Bellamy in danger."

\- "But he is now."

\- "Because of his choices, not because of mine."

Clarke looked at me as if she were disappointed, which I didn't comprehend since I knew I was right. Lexa rose her hand to stop the low conversations that were going on in the room as each of the delegates nodded in my direction.

\- "The Blockade will keep Skaikru contained." –Lexa spoke again before turning to face me- "Bring Pike to us, Jusheda, and we will welcome Skaikru back as one of us."

\- "O ai na wan op trana, Heda." [Or I'll die trying, Commander.]

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

After Sam had made a deal with Lexa, everyone on the room started to leave and we both followed Clarke into her room.

\- "Wao, and I thought the room I got back in Arkadia was big." –Sam stood in the middle of the room as she looked around.

\- "No wonder you didn't want to leave." –I added to her words.

\- "Stop." –Clarke sat on the bed- "You both know why I'm here."

I sighed as I moved to one on the corners of the room to sit on a table as Sam laid down on the floor.

\- "You okay?" –Clarke asked me.

\- "I'm fine. I saw Indra in the crowd... why wasn't she with Lexa?"

\- "Indra's not doing so well, Octavia."

\- "It's her shoulder." –Sam added as she played with one of her knives.

\- "Yeah, but we can't deal with that right now."

\- "Okay, so what do we do?" –I moved in front of her and next to Sam who remained on the floor.

\- "I have to talk with Lexa."

\- "You just did that and look what happened."

\- "If Sam..."

\- "Hey!" –Sam sat back up- "That stupid blockade was not my idea, Clarke."

\- "But you brought back the idea of revenge again."

\- "Pike will pay for his crimes one way or another." –Sam rose up next to me- "Giving him to the Grounders is me being merciful and, if you don't like that, then stay here in Polis with Lexa where you are safe and nothing ever happens. I'm tired of it only being okay to get revenge when you say so."

\- "You can't get rid of everyone who doesn't agree with you, Sam!"

\- "I can and I will if it comes to that."

\- "The Twelve Clans want a war."

\- "And I just stopped it by giving them the option to get revenge on the root of the problem." –Sam sighed- "Please, explain to me why in hell is that a bad idea."

\- "I'm not surprised Clarke is defending Lexa but you, Sam?"

\- "I'm not defending Lexa because I agree with everything she does, O; I defended her because if she dies, we'll really be at war and this time nothing will save us."

\- "I'll see what I can do about the Blockade." –Clarke rushed out of the room- "Stay here."

I glanced at Sam who crossed her arms over her chest and waited to speak until Clarke left.

\- "You have to go, take Selene."

\- "What about you?"

\- "The kill order doesn't affect me. I'm not Skaikru anymore and, if Pike is the representation of it, I'm quite glad I'm not."

\- "What about me? What about our friends?"

\- "You are my sister and that doesn't depend on where we are or to which clan we're chained to, that's on us, O; the clans mean nothing, it's just a way to divide people... You're my sister and that is never going to change."

I moved to her and hugged her as hard as I could.

\- "I'll radio you if anything happens."

\- "I'll move to Arkadia with the Blockade, don't even think you're getting rid of me." –she smiled at me.

\- "Be careful."

\- "You too." –I turned to leave when she spoke again- "And remember, I'm dead."


	11. You know where to find me.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam lets Sheda know about her plan as Kane puts his own into practice.

**SAM'S POV**

As soon as I got out of there, I walked around the city, trying to find Sheda as fast as I could. I went to his house first, only to find his horse was gone.  _He probably went outside the city to train alone, how dare him?_  I smiled to myself and got my things ready before walking around trying to find a horse since Octavia had taken Selene to get back before sundown. I found one of Sheda's friends who lend me his horse with the condition that I'd wash him once I was back; I accepted and started to make our way towards the place where Sheda and I had been training all this time. As expected, I found him there training, to my surprise, with a bow.  _Huh, now this is unexpected_. I didn't bother hiding my presence, getting down from my horse and leaving him next to Sheda's, walking up to him as he shot a target, arrow hitting the exact center.  _Wao, he's really been practicing this without me._  As I got closer, he seemed to sense my presence and turned to face me, pointing his bow at me.

\- "Hey!" –I covered my face with my arms- "Careful where you point that thing at, you could get someone killed." –I eyed him from in between my arms- "You wouldn't want to have the death of your best Trikru friend on you, right?"

\- "I know you have more in common with us, but you're still Skaikru, Sam." –Sheda smiled lowering the bow.

\- "For your information my dear Sheda, I'm an honorary member of Trikru and Titus referred to me as Jusheda, so now you have a couple more names to choose." –I laughed.

\- "Really?" –he walked up to me and I nodded- "But that's great!" –he hugged me as he rose me from the ground.

\- "I knew I could make it." –I laughed as I placed my hands on his shoulders for support.

\- "We all knew you could." –he lowered me- "And Jusheda?" –he raised an eyebrow- "What did you do?"

\- "Why do you think I've done something?" –I crossed my arms over my chest- "I don't know, but it's a cool title and it sounds threatening so I took it." –I shrugged my shoulders- "Titus told me it had to do with my thirst for blood... Jus drein jus daun."

\- "It does sound threatening, yeah... especially if you don't know what it means."

\- "That's the whole point of fighting Skaikru with a new name."

\- "Fighting Skaikru?"

\- "Oh yeah, that's what I was looking you for. So, Heda has called for the army of the Twelve Clans to blockade Arkadia."

\- "That's not a fight."

\- "I'm not done." –I mocked him- "Then... I might have made a side deal with her..."

\- "Oh, no."

\- "Oh, yes." –I smiled- "I need to get Pike out of there and bring him to Polis for the Clans to have their blood; after that, Arkadia will be part of the coalition again."

\- "I'm not letting you out of my sight again."

\- "You have so much faith, it's almost annoying."

\- "Well, someone has to keep an eye on you, won't you agree?"

\- "Contrary to popular belief, I don't need a nanny. I can handle myself, thank you very much."

\- "I know, but that doesn't mean I won't worry."

\- "You don't see me spying 24/7 on you just because I care about you." –I raised an eyebrow at him and he smiled.

\- "You care about me?"

\- "I've already lost Oreth and Ion, I won't lose you too." –I paused before smirking- "Besides, whose ass would I kick every day if you disappear, huh?"

\- "Then let's take it easy." –he took his things and started to walk back to his horse- "First, we join the army and then we can think of a way to get Pike out of there, together."

\- "Sure..." –I rolled my eyes playfully as I got on mine.

**BELLAMY'S POV**

That morning, Hannah had summoned Pike and me to the guard post next to the door.

\- "Hannah?" –Pike asked as soon as he was on the platform.

\- "Sir, we lost contact with one of our Recon teams."

\- "There were four men."

\- "Three teams departed Arkadia at 0800 hours on routine patrol, each of them reported Grounder contact less than a mile outside of camp." –she pointed to the map in front of her- "As per your orders, two teams retreated and made it safely inside the walls."

\- "Third?"

\- "Was forced to engage. I believe they were attempting to secure a defensive position when they ceased transmissions."

\- "Grounders are close."

\- "Gathering from the north and west. It appears they're establishing a blockade, there's no way through it."

\- "Something's changed."

\- "Sir?" –the guard keeping an eye on the exterior walls called Pike- "You need to see this."

Two Grounders on horse appeared from the forest and started to make their way towards our doors.

\- "What do they want?"

\- "They brought a message. I've seen this before."

I started to make my way down the stairs and towards the main door as I remembered that day; the day Sam tried to convince Lexa to take her instead of Finn and she made her the offer to join them.  _Maybe... if that offer hadn't been an option, Sam'd still be alive._

\- "Open the gate."

\- "Do what he says." –Pike walked next to me and commanded the guards.

As they opened the door, I made my way out of the wall, standing directly in front of both Grounders.  _Could one be Sheda?_

\- "Talk."

\- "We seek the one you call Pike." –the one on my right spoke.

_Not Sheda._

\- "Why?"

\- "An army had fallen, blood soaking the earth where he took their lives one by one."

\- "Welcome to the war against Skaikru."

\- "Life was taken. We demand life in return."

\- "My life?" –Pike moved next to me- "What are your terms, sir?"

\- "Come with us, we walk away."

\- "Walk away from what?"

\- "By order of the Commander you've been surrounded by an army of the Twelve Clans." –the second Grounder spoke, he wasn't Sheda either and I felt a bit of relief- "In every direction, warriors wait to kill anyone who attempts to cross the blockade. To greet them as we greeted those we caught outside your walls today." –he threw a bag at our feet, full of our people's clothes- "We left their bodies for the animals, just like you did with the one of you who is one of us now."

_Sam, they found her body. Maybe Sheda took care of her like I couldn't._

\- "That's enough." –I clenched my fists, angry at the memory of Sam and at the vision of the bloody clothes in front of me.

\- "Let's go." –Pike told me.

\- "They won't leave." –I faced him- "I have seen this before."

\- "The men who wore those uniforms took a long time to die." –the second grounder continued.

\- "Bellamy, fall back. That's an order."

\- "If you do not give up your leader, we will have to withdraw from our deal with Jusheda and you will all take a long time to die."

\- "Bellamy."

\- "Choose the side that's best for your people."

\- "I do that every day..." –I took my gun out and shoot them both, killing them- "So far, nothing has changed my mind."

I made my way back inside as they closed the door. Pike followed me and eventually stopped me once we were alone.

\- "What was that?"

\- "They wouldn't leave, I've been through this before sir. The Commander once sent two riders for Sam and Finn and they didn't leave until they went with them."

\- "Who is that Jusheda?"

\- "I don't know."

\- "They said they have a deal with them to only get me. It could be your sister."

\- "No, but whoever that is, is going to be a problem that we need to solve."

**HARPER'S POV**

Miller, Kane and I had met up right after the Grounders came with the message. We needed to know what Pike's next move was going to be: they were going to spy on us. We came to an agreement to change our meet up place and our habits, never doing the same thing twice back to back.

\- "Kane, come in." –Octavia's voice echoed in the room through the walkie as we were about to exit the room.

\- "I told her to never radio me." –Kane sighed taking the walkie.

\- "Maybe it's an emergency." –I wandered off, looking at Miller.

\- "I told you to wait for my orders." -Kane spoke harshly on the walkie.

\- "Too bad I can't follow them after all this time, huh?"

A new voice came through, but it couldn't be, she was dead.

\- "Samantha?"

\- "You didn't really think that terrible shooter could get me, right?" –she chuckled- "Have a little faith, people!"

\- "How... what...?"

\- "I don't have the time and I'm sure you don't either. I need you to help me in. Just me."

\- "When?" –I quickly asked as Kane looked at me.

\- "For what?" –he asked, somewhat worried.

\- "As soon as you can. I'm ending this."

\- "You want to kill Pike?"

\- "I'd love that, but I made a deal with Heda and she wants him alive." –she paused for a second- "I'm sure you are aware of it by now, the two grounders I sent didn't come back and I heard two shots; I'm guessing I'll find their horses eventually."

\- "That's what I've been saying." –I looked defiantly at Kane.

\- "Harper, that would be murder. And that's not who we are."

\- "Maybe it's who we need to be." –Miller rose from his seat, agreeing with me.

\- "I'll do it." –Sam spoke again.

\- "You'd be committing treason, Samantha, I can't let you do that."

\- "Good thing I'm Trikru now, ask any Grounder, I even got a new name that you probably should use so that no one except you three knows I'm alive."

\- "You're Jusheda." -Kane's face lit up as the thought hit him.

\- "That's me. Now, are you letting me in or do I have to kill every guard on the door? Kane, choose now."

\- "I can't let you do that, if you get back in, Pike's guard won't give you a chance, you need to stay outside with Octavia. We'll manage."

\- "Whatever... if your plan doesn't work, you know where to find me. Just outside the walls with the blockade."

\- "Sam, wait!" –I took the radio from Kane.

\- "Yeah?"

\- "Don't you think Bellamy would turn against Pike if he knew you're alive?"

\- "I wish that were true, I'll try talking to him if I see him but Pike's my priority right now." –she paused but I didn't know what to answer- "Pike's using me against Bellamy. Whatever you do, don't tell anyone else I'm alive, okay?"

\- "Okay." –Miller and I answered together and looked at Kane.

\- "As far as everyone is concerned in Arkadia, you died with the army."

\- "Good. Stay alive. Over."

**BELLAMY'S POV**

After the first met up of the day, I left to patrol the walls, trying to figure out who Jusheda was. _It can't be Clarke, they would still refer to her as Wanheda. The Commander of Blood? Could that be right? No one else from Arkadia had enough contact with the Grounders to be accepted like that; it was Clarke, Octavia, and Sam. Clarke's discarded and Sam's dead. Could it be O? She hates Pike but would she come to such agreement? Maybe she's more like Sam than I thought._

\- "Bellamy!"

\- "Monty, hey." –his voice brought me back from my train thought- "What do you need?"

\- "It's Pike, he's calling for another meeting."

I nodded and followed Monty inside the ship and towards Pike's office but, before we could say anything, he pointed at a thing on the table: a microphone, that's how our plans had been getting out so fast. I nodded, knowing what Pike was about to do: he started talking about a figurative plan that we'd be carrying out, speaking to the microphone to make sure whoever was behind the espionage would have to make a move soon. After Pike explained the whole plan to us, we walked out of there as if that was what we were going to do but, in reality, we were following Kane's every move.

\- "Bellamy, you were right." –Monty spoke to me through his walkie- "I've got eyes on Kane."

\- "Anything suspicious?"

\- "Yeah, he's got something going on and I think Sinclair's part of it."

\- "Copy that, we'll stay on Sinclair."

And that's what we did, we kept our eyes on Sinclair, waiting for him to make a move. After a couple hours, he did; I entered the mechanical room and there he was, lying below the Rover, doing something to it.

\- "Sinclair, what are you up to?"

\- "Raven said the solenoid's acting up so..." –he rose from the floor- "I thought I'd swap it out."

I looked around until I found Kane, who was pretending to be reading a book and I smiled to myself, knowing I had caught him in the act.

\- "You got a work order for that?"

\- "Sure... I think it's on my desk."

He looked at me as I took out my walkie and he started running away from me.

\- "Go."

And with my order, a couple guards appeared from each door of the room, cornered him and tied him up.

\- "There is no work order and there is nothing wrong with the rover." –I stated as I walked up to him- "Though if you had another 10 minutes, I'm sure there would be. You're under arrest, charge is treason."

I motioned the guards that had him tied up to take him away and I turned around to look for Kane, who had disappeared, as I expected.

\- "That's one down."

I walked over to the interrogation room, finding Sinclair in there with two guards. He didn't say anything, he just looked at me up and down before looking straight again.

\- "Anything?" –Pike asked as he came in.

\- "Not a word, sir."

**KANE'S POV**

Everything was going exactly according to plan: Sinclair had gotten himself locked up so that he could send a message to Lincoln and the rest of the people locked up while I tried to look as guilty as possible to Bellamy.  _If we pull this off, we'll save hundreds of lives and Samantha and Octavia won't have to risk theirs again._  After they had taken Sinclair away, I went back to the mechanical room and started to eye the place when Bellamy appeared from behind me.

\- "It wasn't much of a plan, sabotaging the rover." –he started- "Keeping an eye on Sinclair was an easy call."

\- "Was it?" –I faced him- "Spying on your friend, that was easy."

\- "People in camp are losing focus. There's a threat outside these walls..."

\- "The threat's inside the walls." –I cut him off- "Can't you see that? Pike's turning us against each other."

\- "He's the Chancellor, have you forgotten that?"

\- "No... no, I haven't."

\- "Then do the right thing."

\- "That's the problem, no matter how I look at it... I am."

\- "Really? Because the way I see it Monroe died because of you."

\- "And now Pike's locked up Sinclair. You don't think he'll be the next to die?"

\- "Of course not." –he seemed to be taken aback by my insinuation.

\- "Pike killed Samantha in cold blood even if he knew what she meant to you and you still think he won't kill us all?"

\- "Stop using Sam against me, she's dead and there's nothing I could've done to save her." –he looked away- "I think about her every damn day, I still wake up and I reach for her but she's gone... I can't believe I've lost the best thing that ever happened to me..." –he was opening up so I stood silent- "I keep wondering what else I could've done to save her, to keep her safe with me... I really tried but she wouldn't listen, she chose the Grounders over me."

\- "She didn't choose, Bellamy, you left her."

I knew this was still a touchy subject for him but I also thought Samantha was the only one who ever got to truly know him and, maybe, he'd come around because of her. I had promised her I wouldn't tell anyone she was alive so I thought what else I could say.

\- "Think about where this ends..." –I spoked again, seeing Bellamy wasn't going to say anything as he had clenched her jaw and had shut his eyes- "...half the camp behind bars while the other half starves. People won't stand for it..." –he looked again at me- "...they'll turn against Pike but, by then it'll be too late."

\- "Pike has a plan." –he shifted uncomfortably in his place.

\- "Pike's always got a plan and it's always the same one: take the fight to the Grounders; that's what got Monroe killed, that's what got Sam executed."

\- "You're crossing a line, Kane." –he threatened me.

\- "No, I crossed it." –I looked around me for a second- "I asked you here because I hoped you'd join me, it's still not too late to choose the right side."

\- "That's exactly what I came here to tell you." –and with that, he left.

**BELLAMY'S POV**

I moved back to the control room where Monty had everything set up to control everyone inside the ship. We waited for Bryan to do his part and report back to us.

\- "So, the bug's in place?" –I asked him as he made it inside.

\- "It's in his jacket." –Bryan answered as he paced the room before setting down beside me- "I don't think he knows."

\- "Good man."

\- "Am I?" –he was doubting himself and I had to reassure him somehow before he did something stupid- "Is this... any of this worth lying to someone I love?"

\- "It is if you're protecting him."

\- "Unless the person he needs protection from is me."

I could hear the pain and resentment in his voice, I knew how he was feeling, I had been there with Sam; that's why I knew it was worth it... because I'd have done it if it meant Sam would have stayed alive.


	12. I've come for you.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam makes it back to Arkadia knowing fully well no one can stop her. Or that at least that’s how it was supposed to go.

**HARPER'S POV**

Kane's plan hadn't worked, Bellamy had managed to stop him and now he was on lockup too, leaving only Miller and me left and we had run out of ideas. We were having lunch when Bryan came and sat next to him with his food and started talking with him as I zoned out, and that's when I got it.  _Sam._

\- "Miller, I need your help."

\- "What you need."

Miller looked confused at me as Bryan eyed me suspiciously.  _I need an excuse, fast._

\- "Remember that shelf I was building earlier for the food supplies? I need your help to hang it."

I said the first thing that came to mind, I knew it sounded stupid but I hoped Miller would catch on.

\- "Sure."

\- "Can't that wait?" –Bryan quickly stopped Miller from raising.

\- "I'd like to get it done before tonight. I wouldn't like Pike getting angry about our food supplies not being properly organized now that we have to go into rationing mode."

\- "I'll come meet you once it's done, how long can that take?"

Miller chuckled, helping me sell the lie to Bryan who simply nodded. We made our way inside the ship, making sure no one followed us and entered the room where Kane had hidden the radio he used to contact Octavia.

\- "What was that about?"

\- "They've caught Kane and we're running out of options. If we keep going at this rate a war could strike and we'd most likely die, the Grounders are thousands and we don't stand a chance."

\- "What do you suggest?"

\- "Jusheda."

Miller paced the room thinking as I started to worry he had changed sides.

\- "Call them." –he stopped in front of me and I nodded- "It's our last chance."

\- "Anyone read me?" –I spoke on the radio- "We don't have much time."

\- "I'm here."

\- "We'll help you in."

\- "Good, I'll knock once I'm inside."

\- "We'll be there. Just Miller and I, they got everyone else... Kane is being questioned right now."

\- "Got it."

\- "Be fast."

\- "Will be. Over."

****━━━━━━** **

**SAM'S POV**

After talking with Harper, I gave the radio back to Octavia as Sheda eyed me.

\- "I'm going with you."

\- "No." –I stopped her- "If something goes wrong, I need you out here to think of something else."

\- "But..."

\- "No buts, you've already gone in and out too many times, it's a risk I won't take. I'm sure Pike has it for you now, this is why me being dead is a good thing, he won't see it coming." –she nodded- "You stay with Indra and Sheda."

\- "What's your plan?" –Sheda moved in front of me.

\- "I go in, I get Pike, I get out." –I shrugged my shoulders- "Easy."

\- "What if someone sees you?"

\- "I'll make sure that doesn't happen."

\- "I'll go in with you."

\- "No offense Sheda, but I'll move faster alone; besides, you'd draw too much attention." –I chuckled eyeing him up and down.

\- "I want to help."

\- "I need my war paint..." –I smiled at him- "...fast."

\- "That's the least I can do, Jusheda."

He moved away from us and towards his horse where he had the paint he used on both of us every time he fancied trying something new for my war paint.

\- "What do you think of Sheda?" –Octavia crossed her arms over her chest as she faced me.

\- "What do you mean?" –I eyed her- "Be direct with me, you know I hate the chasing game."

\- "I think he likes you."

\- "Things would have been much more difficult if he didn't."

\- "Sam..."

\- "Oh... I see...I'd never cheat on Bellamy."

\- "I know." –she smiled softly- "But, if you weren't with him..."

\- "I don't have the time or the energy to think about love right now, O. I'm trying to stop a war and to keep us both alive."

\- "I'm just saying..."

\- "I know what you're saying but shut up." -I smiled- "Worry me about that once Pike's dead."

\- "Oh, you can count on that." –she chuckled as she pushed me back lightly.

\- "I got it!" –Sheda sprinted towards us- "Sit down and close your eyes."

I did as he asked and, soon enough, I had my war paint on again; I liked it, it made me feel powerful. I rose from the ground and took all my weapons before saying my goodbyes and hugging them both, having to break both hugs as they weren't willing to do it themselves. I entered the tunnels that got to the loose panel of the ship as Octavia had instructed me. As I was almost at the end of the passage, I took a deep breath to relax my body.  _We got this, in and out. No one is there has anything on me on a fight, I've been training hard with Sheda for this. I got this._  I knocked on the wall as I had said I would and, soon enough, a panel moved to the side revealing Harper and Miller.

\- "Sam!" –Harper hugged me as soon as I was out.

\- "Thank God you survived!"

\- "Yeah, tell me that once this is over." –I hugged him too- "Where's Pike."

\- "They just started questioning Kane, it may take a while."

\- "Anyone with him?"

\- "Bellamy and Hannah."

\- "That woman really gets on my nerves."

\- "Also... there's someone we couldn't keep this a secret from..."

\- "Who are you...?"

\- "Sam?"

I turned around only to be met by a pair of arms around my body, keeping me from moving before I received a couple hits on my upper arms.

\- "It's almost over, J." –I caught his fists- "I'm sorry I didn't contact you, I couldn't put you in danger... I'm sorry for the pain I have caused you."

\- "I know... I know..." –he hugged me again- "But I've missed you so much and I was so mad... Everything is going insane around here without you."

\- "I know..."

\- "No, it's not only Pike..." –he eyed me- "Jaha is back."

\- "Please, a problem at a time. I'll deal with Pike and then you tell me what Jaha is up to now." –then, something hit me- "Is Murphy back too?"

\- "Jaha came in alone..." –Harper looked at me- "Sorry."

\- "It's fine, I'm sure he's okay... I'll question Jaha about it later." –I sighed- "You got a plan or should I just do my thing?"

\- "Miller will go around the ship towards the interrogation room and will let me know once Pike's out and where he's going; I'll get to him and set him up somewhere for you to catch him and..."

\- "No. That's too dangerous for you Harper. If anything happens and I fail, Pike'd know you helped me. Just tell me where he's going and who's he with and I'll do the rest, okay?" -Miller and Harper nodded- "As for you, my very first friend in this trash hole of a planet, go back to whatever duties you have and don't speak about this to anyone until we're done, I won't risk your life either."

\- "Don't die again, Sam. I couldn't go through that again."

\- "I'll try my very best, I can promise you that."

Jasper hugged me once more before leaving with Miller; Harper stayed with me so that I could hear from Miller through her walkie.

\- "Guys, Pike and Hannah just got out. Hannah is going to the armory and Pike is walking towards lockup. It's now or never, Sam."

\- "Got it. Get away from there. No one can know you're with me." –I spoke on Harper's walkie- "Over."

\- "Good luck, Sam."

\- "Stay safe."

\- "Here." –she handed me one of her guns- "Just in case."

\- "Let's hope I won't need it."

Harper nodded and hugged me before leaving the opposite way I was. Lockup wasn't far away from where we were and, luckily, I still remembered every corner of the damn ship. On one of my turns, I saw a guard.  _My shooter, what a lucky coincidence... I have to get rid of him, he's on my way... If I shoot him, they'll hear me..._  I took one of my blades.  _I can always hurt him badly and then come back to show him how it's done._  As he approached me, I stuck to the corner wall so that he wouldn't see me and, once he walked past me, I stabbed him on the abdomen.

\- "You're not a very good shooter." –I let him fall to the floor- "I told you it had to be a killer shot."

\- "Impossible." –he breathed out, holding his stomach.

\- "Best believe it." –I lowered down and tied his legs and arms so that he wouldn't escape- "Make a single sound, and I'll end you, understood?"

He nodded, although I knew he'd make a sound as soon as I was out of his sight.  _There's no one where I came from and this way we get to lockup. Maybe I'll get lucky and he'll call for Pike. Or..._

\- "You've got a walkie, right?" –he nodded- "Be a good pawn and ask Pike to come here, alone."

\- "What should I say?" –he was so scared for his life, he was willing to cooperate.

\- "I don't know, just make sure he comes here alone."

\- "Alright. If I do it, you'll let me live?"

\- "I want Pike here. Alone." –I emphasized- "Get that done and we'll talk."

\- "Alright, alright." –I put the walkie to his mouth- "This is Brown, I'm in corridor 4B, I need Pike, there's something he needs to see."

\- "This is Pike. What is it, Brown?" –he looked at me and I nodded.

\- "You should come and see it for yourself, sir. We may have a cue on those traitors."

\- "Alright Brown, keep your eyes open, I'm almost there. Over."

I turned off the walkie and turned to Brown.

\- "Good, now I'm going to need you to stay real quiet."

\- "I will."

\- "Oh, I know."

I took out the gun Harper had given me and hit him on the head as hard as I could with its butt and he fell to the floor.  _Good._  I had to move fast now; I dragged him to the end of the hallway to make sure Pike had to come all the way through and I hid in a lateral dead-end corridor that parted from that main one and I waited. Pike didn't lie, he walked past me and started running as he saw Brown on the floor; I came out of my hideout and pointed the gun at him as he took out his walkie.

\- "Drop it."

He froze in his place at my command and slowly turned around as his eyes widened.

\- "You... Besnik. You were dead."

\- "Your man there couldn't hit a target even if his life depended on it." –I smiled- "Funnily enough, his life did depend on it."

\- "You killed him?"

\- "Not yet. I'll wait till he wakes up to show him how it's done."

\- "You wouldn't."

\- "You don't know me very well."

\- "Why are you here?"

\- "I came for you, it's over Pike, you heard the riders I sent this morning."

\- "It will never be over unless we show them who we are."

\- "We?" –I scoffed- "You said I wasn't Skaikru. You got me shot because I was a Grounder."

\- "You could still join us."

\- "I'm not Skaikru anymore. I'm Jusheda and you've executed my people, it's time to face the consequences."

\- "What makes you think I'll go with you."

\- "I'll start with him if you don't."

\- "You're not a murderer."

\- "Don't you remember why I was sent down here with the 100?" –I moved the gun slightly and shot the guard, before putting it away, knowing I couldn't carry Pike all the way back on my own- "Next thing, you get a knife on your thigh."

\- "Don't you think they've heard the shot?"

\- "I'm not afraid of your sheep, Pike."

He quickly moved his hand to his gun and tried to point it at me but I was fast enough to throw him one of my blades, pinning his hand to the wall.

\- "Don't fight this."

He moved to get rid of my knife but I ran up to him and punched his jaw as he got rid of the knife; he cut my upper arm making me take one step back. He spat blood and rose the knife in front of him.

\- "It's over, Besnik."

\- "This will be over once you're dead, Charles."

He moved to me with the knife and I rose my hands up, faking surrender for the best way to deal with a knife, is getting rid of it. As he eyed my hands and I kept eye contact, once he entered my reach space, I moved fast to kick his hand, making him drop the knife that hit the floor and ended next to the wall for he wasn't expecting me to use my legs. Now that he was out of weapons he moved threateningly and tall towards me, raising his fists in front of him. It was almost too easy. He tried his best to hit me, but he didn't seem to be much of an expert on hand-to-hand fighting.  _That's why he's so afraid, he's only brave enough when he has a gun on him._  I hit him on the jaw once and twice on the stomach, making him drop to his knees, an opportunity I took to put my arm around his neck, immobilizing him.

\- "And this one is for what you did to Murphy that day in one of the few classes I got to attend." –I felt him tense at my words- "I didn't recognize Murphy the first day we landed but, when I saw you again, it all came back to me. If you hurt my family, you pay the consequences."

And with that, I increased the pressure of my arm around his neck, until I felt he'd gone limp, letting him drop unconscious on the floor.  _I mean, it's not ideal, but this will have to do._  I was about to start pulling him towards the place I had come from when a voice behind me made me stop.

****━━━━━━━━**   
**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

\- "Sam?"

I whispered her name, thinking my mind was playing tricks the same way Clarke's played her with Finn.

\- "Bellamy." –she breathed out, probably not expecting to see me.

\- "I... you... I thought you were dead."

\- "You out of everyone down here should know I don't die easily." –she smiled- "You should have come out to check my body... why didn't you?" –she genuinely asked me completely facing me and forgetting about Pike who was lying unconscious on the floor next to a dead guard.

\- "I couldn't."

I looked at the floor and soon I felt her hand on my chin, making me raise my eyes to meet hers. She was wearing Grounder clothes and had her war paint on again, her eyes were clear looking at me and I felt my knees weaken at the sight.

\- "I... you're real, you're here..." -I whispered as I caressed her face, running my fingers over her skin, making sure I was not seeing things- "You're alive."

\- "I've come for you, to take you home." –she took my hands in hers.

\- "What?" –I blinked a few times, confused.

\- "We are gonna get rid of Pike and then we are going to work through whatever you're dealing with. Together. I promised you I'd always choose you and that's for the good and the bad, alright?"

She smiled, a sight I'd been dreaming about, a sight that had been haunting my nightmares and that I thought I'd never get to witness again. I felt my eyes become watery as I moved my hands to her waist and I hugged her, pulling her as close to me as I could.

\- "I love you."

I moved my hands to the back of her neck and I kissed her, I couldn't stop myself; I knew I shouldn't but I did it anyway. She kissed me back instantly, resting her hands on my belt; her lips were as soft as I remembered them and she tasted salty and smelled like the woods, taking me back to our days in the dropship. As we broke apart to breathe and I rested my forehead against hers, everything clicked; I knew what I had to do.

\- "You're Jusheda."

\- "I told you I'd get a cool name." –she smiled softly.

\- "I've missed you. I thought I had lost you forever. I love you."

\- "Why didn't you trust me, my love?"

\- "Because you're wrong about this."

I pulled out my shook baton and I hit her on the back with it as I let go of her not to electrocute myself too; I felt the tears clouding my vision but not enough not to see the betrayal in her eyes.  _I love you, I really do._

\- "Bellamy, no!"

Monty's voice traveled through the hallway and got to me all too late; Sam had gone limp against my body as I threw the baton behind her, seeing Pike opening his eyes and placing his hand on his head. I picked Sam up in my arms like so many times before intending to get her to our room, to keep her safe forever with me.

\- "Get her to lockup." –Pike spoke as soon as he rose from the floor.

\- "But sir..."

\- "She belongs with her type, son. I know you think she loves you but Grounders can't love, they only know pain, war and blood... and Besnik is no exception."

\- "That's not true."

\- "Are you questioning my decisions? I thought you said you'd do the best for your people."

I glanced at Pike before I saw Monty moving in front of me, his eyes locked on Sam before he raised them to look at me as if he were saying 'what have you done'.

\- "I will, sir."

\- "Then get her to lockup... take her weapons away first."

Pike walked past me, covering his bloody hand and moving to Medical to get the cuts on his face treated.  _She hit him good._  I smiled before sighing and moving towards lockup followed by Monty.

\- "I was listening to the records from Miller's bug when I recognized Sam's voice... I was coming to let you know and..." –he sighed looking at her- "I thought she was dead..."

\- "Me too." –I looked down at her- "I'm so glad she's not."

\- "You still think we're doing the right thing?"

\- "What do you mean?"

\- "You just knocked Sam out." –he looked up at me- "You've... betrayed her."

\- "I'm trying to protect her like I should have done the first time. I just got her back, I'm not loosing her again; I couldn't go through that process again..."

\- "Are you sure about that? You... well..."

\- "I what?"

\- "You didn't seem too bothered by her death."

\- "That's what you think?"

\- "That's what everyone thinks, Bellamy. None of us would've thought you'd let anyone hurt her and look where we are now..."

\- "I'm doing what's right. I'll get her out of lockup once she realizes she's wrong."

I ended as we stood in front of the door and the guards opened it for me to place Sam inside after we got rid of her many blades and a gun.  _She was prepared for everything... except for me. But this gun...?_  Lincoln turned around from the window he was looking through as soon as he heard the door opening up and his face dropped as he recognized her.

\- "Is that...?" –he moved towards me- "What have you done!"

\- "She's alive." –was all I could say before he took her from me- "She tried to kill Pike."

\- "And what stopped her?" –Sinclair asked approaching us.

\- "I did."


	13. Betrayal and desperation.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam wakes up in lockup and everything seems to just go downhill from then on. What else could go wrong now?

**SAM'S POV**

I woke up to what already seemed to be the rule down here: a pained body and a dizzy mind. The events started to come back to me and I wished it was all a bad dream as I slowly rose from whatever I was lying on.

\- "No, definitely not a dream." –I whispered reaching to hold my lower back- "You don't feel pain like this in a dream."

\- "Sam!" –Lincoln's voice resonated in the room, prompting me to open my eyes and turn my face to see where he was- "Thank the Commander you're okay."

\- "If by okay you mean still alive then yeah, sure... I'm doing great." –I blinked a couple times, trying to get used to the light.

\- "We mourned you..." –he had been standing in front of me, probably pacing the room until I woke up- "Octavia and I tried to go out to find you but Pike wouldn't allow us..." –he squatted in front of me.

\- "Let me guess, my rooting body should be a message for our people?"

Lincoln nodded before he hugged me lightly but, at this point, physical pain was the last thing I was worried about, so I hug him back as strongly as I could.

\- "I'm glad to see you, brother."

\- "What happened?"

\- "I... Ion's dead, Lincoln. The day I managed to get out of here, I found him bleeding out in the clearing... he died in my arms..." –I sniffled looking away- "They killed them all and executed the wounded. After that, Indra and I found Lexa and Octavia came to meet us."

\- "She knew you were alive?"

\- "Yeah, I asked her not to say anything. I thought that'd be an advantage but, clearly, I was wrong..."

\- "How'd you end up here?" –Sinclair made his way next to us.

\- "I... I've been betrayed." –I spoke as calmly as I could but it proved hard- "I had Pike, I had knocked him out and was about to start moving away towards the passage I had come through to get him to the army outside but then..."

\- "Sam." –Bellamy's voice echoed through my ears and I felt a mix of rage and longing in my heart as I clenched my fists.

****━━━━━━━━**   
**

**LINCOLN'S POV**

\- "How could you!" –the rage in Sam's voice was enough to make everyone in the cell feel in danger.

\- "I had to, he'd have killed you." –Bellamy's voice was shaky.

\- "He already tried once, what makes you think he won't now that you've put me in a fucking cage?! I had Pike knocked out without anyone's help, I had him and you ruined it!" –Sam raised from her seat and walked up to him, the wall of the cell standing between them both and, for a moment, I thought Bellamy should be glad there was something keeping them apart, or else Sam might have killed him- "How could you let this happen! Ion's dead, Bellamy, he died in my arms. He was my friend, he was your friend." –Sam started yelling as she pointed at Bellamy through the mesh that kept them apart- "I don't know who you are."

\- "They were going to hurt us. I was trying to protect us... to protect you."

\- "No, no. Stop saying that. Stop lying, Bellamy! I don't fucking care what Pike has told you and what lies he's got in your brain. You were not trying to protect us, if you were, you'd have never voted Pike Chancellor, you'd have never gone with him to kill my friends, our friends and allies, but most importantly... you'd have never let anyone hurt me, you wouldn't have hurt me, you'd have never hit me with that baton. You... you've betrayed me." –Sam was crying now- "I don't want to see you ever again. When I get out of here I will kill Pike and whoever stands in my way. That includes you."

\- "Sam, I thought you were dead..."

I had never seen Bellamy so heartbroken and terrified since I'd met him.

\- "Then let's keep it that way." -Sam's voice was cruel, poisonous; she had wiped the tears from her face, smudging her war paint with them.

\- "You don't understand, I've been mourning you since you left, I... I thought I had lost you for good this time... I broke down and I cried myself to sleep, I even got drunk sleeping on our bed..."

\- "The only thing I've ever wanted was for you to trust me." –she cut him off- "Everything else? That's on you, Sky Boy."

\- "I'm doing the right thing."

\- "You haven't done the right thing for a while now, I just hope you'll see that one day soon." –Sam turned around, her back to Bellamy.

\- "Wait, Sam!"

\- "No, Bellamy. Leave, you've done enough."

\- "But..."

\- "I told you I could deal with physical pain. I don't blame you for what happened to me, I know you had no saying in me being shot, you couldn't have stopped Pike even if you wanted to; but this? Betrayal." –Sam faced him and scoffed- "You've really gone there."

\- "Sam..."

\- "I thought you loved me, but I guess you just loved the idea of being loved, of being wanted, needed..." –she laughed almost maniacally- "I'm such a fucking fool, I should have known. You've used me."

\- "That is not true, Sam, and you know it. I did love you, I still do and intend on doing so for the rest of our lives." -Bellamy maintained eye contact with Sam, his voice was gentle and I knew he was being honest and I was certain Sam did too.

\- "You don't betray the people you love." –she turned around once again- "Get out from my sight before I do something we'll both regret."

\- "Sam..."

Sam turned to the guards, who were looking at their exchange of words with fear in their eyes as everyone inside the cell was; she addressed them threateningly.

\- "Get him out of here before I kill the three of you... and trust me, I will."

The guards, probably aware of who Sam was and her abilities, moved towards Bellamy and started to push him away as he tried to resist calling for Sam, but she wasn't listening anymore; she was standing with her back to the cell's wall and hugging her torso as I saw the tears fall to the ground once more. I got up from the bench and moved up to her to hold her in my arms.

\- "I'm so sorry, Lincoln." –she collapsed against my chest- "I don't know what to do now, he's gone. I don't know who that is, but... I've lost him."

\- "Come, sit." –I moved us both towards the bench I had placed her when Bellamy brought her inside.

\- "Ion's death is on me, I don't even know why I'm so mad at Bellamy..." –she sat down- "Ion asked to join Indra so that we could see each other more often, because he believed we could be united. It's my fault. Same way it's my fault I ended in here; I should have knocked him out but instead... he talked to me and I really thought he was on my side... on our side..."

\- "Sam, that's not true... You need time to process it all, to mourn..."

\- "No, no, no..." –she shook her head- "A warrior doesn't mourn their dead until the war's done. I will kill Pike, even if that's the last thing I do." –she raised her head to look at me- "We need to get out of here."

\- "You're hurt."

\- "We both know I've been worse. There are Grounders out there waiting for me to get Pike to them."

\- "And what about those who helped him?"

\- "I told Lexa I'd try to bring her Pike and a couple of his followers so that the ritual they started with Finn could end with them." –she looked at the guards who had just come back to their positions- "So... either they change sides or they die."

\- "And Bellamy?"

\- "I hope he'll see the light because I know I wouldn't be able to kill him, even if I just told him I would..." –she sighed- "And I think he knows that too."

As Sam was explaining to everyone in the cell what was going on outside, a couple guards made their way to the door, pushing a handcuffed Kane in front of them. Once he was inside, he rubbed his wrists before looking around until he laid eyes on Sam.

\- "Samantha. What...?"

\- "I had Pike." –Sam approached him- "I was informed your plan failed so I put mine into action, everything was going just fine..."

\- "How did you end up here?"

\- "Bellamy."

\- "You should have stayed outside."

\- "I should have done a lot of things, Kane." –Sam crossed her arms over her chest- "Did Pike go back to you once he woke up?"

\- "That was you?"

\- "I told you I had him."

\- "He did come back to keep questioning me, I asked him to hand himself in and not only he isn't doing that but he also sentenced me to death."

\- "What!" –Sam's voice drew the attention of the guards outside- "That's not happening."

\- "We're alone now, there's nothing we can do."

\- "Why are you always so ready to give up. We'll think of something."

We tried to come up with ideas for some time but, seeing none of them were good enough, each of us went their own way. I moved to my people to make sure everyone was okay and to try and reassure them that they would get out of here soon.

\- "Chancellor on deck." –one of the guards outside the cell spoke as the doors to lockup opened.

\- "I don't need you telling me that Kane's here. I can see him pretty well, thank you." –Sam scoffed from the middle of the room where she was lying face up.

\- "Samantha..."

\- "What? I'm already in lockup, Kane. What is that excuse of a person going to do to me now? Please, he's already taken almost everything from me. What else could he do? Kill me?" –she chuckled sitting up- "Maybe this time they won't miss."

\- "Quiet." –Kane reproached her as he rose to face Pike.

\- "Look, he even comes with his little minions, what a pleasing sight; do they need a toy to play with because they run out of innocent lives to slaughter?"

She laid back down and closed her eyes, completely ignoring's Bellamy's eyes on her. Kane shook his head before he spoke to Pike.

\- "I had more time."

\- "I'm not here for you." –he looked around the cell- "Each of you is guilty of the same crimes as Kane and, as such, you will share the same fate..." –I noticed Sam slowly raising up with her fists clenched and I knew this wouldn't end well- "You're all sentenced to death."

\- "Chit don dula he biyo?" [What did he say] –Skyla rose from her seat and tried to walk towards Pike but Sam stopped her, catching her ankle.

\- "Nou trip raun yu." – [Don't worry] I rose from my seat and tried to reassure her before moving next to Kane to speak to Pike- "My people are innocent, they know nothing; don't let them suffer for my crimes, please."

\- "Sir, Lincoln's right." -Bellamy interceded- "All the others did was run through an open door, same thing we'd do if we were in there."

\- "I believe that's true."

\- "Yu laik klir." –I glanced at Sam that was talking with the rest of my people, calming them down [You're safe.]- "Yu na na au kom hir." [You are getting out of here.]

\- "Kane, Lincoln, Sinclair and Besnik..." –Pike continued as Sam stopped speaking and she walked up next to me- "...as the leaders of this coup, you will pay for your crimes with your lives."

\- "You want the leader of this? That's me." –Sam spoke calmly and Pike moved to be directly in front of her- "You really think these idiots could manage to get so close to you without help? Lincoln knows nothing of how we do things here, he is no leader; Sinclair, well, we all know he doesn't have it in him to boss people around, therefore there's no way he could have planned this out; Kane still thinks talking is the best politics, do you honestly think he'd give you out to the Grounders to kill you? Please." –she ended up scoffing.

I knew Sam was saying what Pike wanted to hear and didn't mean any of it but, still, it amazed me the ease with which she referred to each of us as if we meant nothing to her.

\- "I've been monitoring your every move since the day I left; I am the one that's been telling them what do to, how to do it and when to do it; I am the leader of this shit. If you're so eager to execute someone, why don't you shoot me right now? It's not like I can hide anywhere nor defend myself, just how you like to do things."

\- "You expect me to believe that? You've just come back in; which reminds me..." –he signaled to the guards- "Get her out."

Sam didn't move from where she stood as the guards entered the cell, making sure everyone else moved away from the door. A couple of my people tried to reach Sam but she shook her head and reassured them she knew what she was doing.

\- "What are you going to do with her?"

\- "I'm getting information."

\- "Uh, yeah, information." –Sam mocked him as the guards pushed her outside- "You can cut my tongue as far as I'm concerned, you don't have anything on me, you ain't getting shit."

\- "Sam!" –I moved to the wall of the cells as soon as they closed the door- "Not again."

\- "I got this, biga bro. Ai na tran gon kep klin yu. Kep in emo klir. Leidon." [I'll try to save you. Keep them safe. Goodbye.]

\- "What are you saying?" –Pike took her by the chin and forced her to look at him.

\- "Huh, wouldn't you like to know. –she smiled- "Learn."

\- "That smile is not going to last much longer."

\- "I wouldn't bet."

And with that, Pike and the two guards taking Sam disappeared through the door. Bellamy had stayed back and was now looking pensive.

\- "You have to help her." –Kane rushed to him- "Pike might have sentenced us all to death but he's really looking forward to getting rid of Sam. You can save her."

\- "No one can save her now." –Sinclair sat down and placed his head in between his hands- "We're all dead."

\- "She knows what she's doing." –Bellamy looked at me before exiting the room as I wondered what he meant with that.

****━━━━━━**   
**

**SAM'S POV**

After Pike pulled me out of my cell, the guards brought me to a room which I assumed was the interrogation room where Kane had been a couple hours ago.  _Well, worst case scenario, this gives Kane, Lincoln, and Sinclair time to think of something._  The two guards strapped me down to the chair before moving away.  _They really are scared of me, I could have had so much fun around here..._

\- "How'd you get in?" -Pike sat in front of me.

\- "Walking." –I tried to contain a laugh but I couldn't- "If you think you're getting anything from me, you're in for a big disappointment."

\- "Who helped you inside? Kane was in here and Sinclair and Lincoln were on lockup, who else is working against me."

\- "Every Grounder on Earth."

\- "Who's working with you from Skaikru."

\- "If you are the embodiment of Skaikru then I'm gonna say no one because no decent Skaikru would be on your side."

\- "Who's working with you from inside Arkadia?"

\- "No one."

\- "That's a lie."

\- "Is it?"

\- "I want answers." –he smashed his fist on the table before abruptly bringing his hand back to his body and rubbing it with the other.

\- "Yeah, you may want to let that heal before you do that." –I smiled, seeing the blood appear through the bandage- "Nasty cut."

\- "If Bellamy hadn't caught you, you might have gone through with your plan."

\- "Can't trust anyone these days, right?"

He nodded at the guard that was on the door, who left for a moment and came soon after followed by a tied-up Bellamy with a gag in his mouth.  _What in fucking hell?_  I felt my blood freeze and boil inside my body at the same time both in fear and rage but I knew I couldn't show it.

\- "I know hurting you won't get me anywhere..." –Pike motioned for the guard to push Bellamy next to him- "But would you let me hurt your boyfriend?"

\- "If you're trying to hurt my boyfriend, you are at least a month late. This Grounder here is single; I don't know who that is, but that's not the leader I fell in love with." –I made myself comfortable on my chair, placing my feet on the table as I avoided looking at Bellamy, I knew I had to sell it or we were all dead.

\- "Is that right?" –Pike took out a gun and placed it to Bellamy's head- "Then you won't mind if I get rid of him."

I tried to remain as emotionless as I could.  _Would Pike kill Bellamy just to get me to answer a couple questions? Is he that desperate? No._  I knew it was a bluff, Pike would never kill his right hand; if he did, he'd lose half the camp or more.  _Bellamy's still on his side, that's the only reason we're here and not at Polis... Pike knows if he kills him, there's no real chance I'd speak. Why would I?_

\- "Please, go ahead." I pointed at Bellamy with my head- "But make sure you get him better than your shooter got me or else this place will be filled with blood."

Bellamy gasped at my words, making me turn my attention to him for a moment: wide-eyes were glued to me, his shoulders dropped slightly as my eyes landed on him, he looked terrified, as if he really thought I meant what I just said or that Pike would go through with this.  _He really has lost all sense of perception while I've been gone. Why didn't you trust me, love? We could have figured this out together._  Pike shoved the gun to Bellamy's temple and he closed his eyes a second before Pike pulled the trigger. As I expected, nothing happened and I breathed relieved in my own head.

\- "You really have changed, Besnik. You really are a Grounder incapable of love."

\- "You may want to stop looking in the mirror, Pike; I might be a Grounder but the one incapable of love is you."

\- "You can go now, son." -Pike put the gun down and untied Bellamy.

\- "Sir..." –Bellamy started as he rose from his knees but Pike cut him off.

\- "We'll talk later. Wait outside."

Bellamy looked startled at me and I nodded.

\- "Don't look at me, I don't give the orders around here, son."

I could still read him like an open book, he was scared and surprised, I'd say there was a glint of guilt in his eyes but I wasn't sure for what. He nodded and left with the two guards, leaving Pike, another guard, and me alone.

\- "I've threatened you with everything I have." –Pike rose from his seat and paced the room- "It really is an inconvenience the other Blake isn't here, I'm sure you'd answered if that had been her."

\- "If you touch Octavia, you'll have the whole army on you."

\- "Empty threats don't scare me."

\- "Good thing this isn't an empty one." -I put my feet on the floor again- "Try leaving camp and you'll see what we do to people like you."

He nodded slightly and I felt something collapsing with my jaw before I fell to the floor with the chair as the blood filled my mouth.

\- "Get her back to lockup." –Pike stood in front of me, talking with the guard that had punched me- "Execution is set for dawn." –he looked at me- "You'll be the last, you'll see everyone else die before you."

The guard pulled me up and untied me from the chair as Pike opened the door for us to leave.

\- "One last thing." –I spoke as we walked past Pike- "Fuck you." –I spat on his face.

\- "You'll regret that." –Pike cleaned his face.

\- "Oh, really? What are you going to do? Kill me?"

I laughed as the guard took me back to lockup and pushed me inside, still tied up with a rope as I feel on my knees.

\- "Sam!" –Lincoln helped me raise from the floor- "What did he do to you?" –he started to untie me as Skyla, a Grounder who helped Nyko heal people, came to me and started checking my jaw.

\- "Oh, this?" –I smiled but it hurt- "Pike got me punched because I didn't tell him shit, right before informing me that we are all being executed at dawn."

\- "What?" –a voice behind me made me turn around.

\- "What are you doing here?"

\- "I had to see you."

\- "You're a funny human being, SkyBoy."

\- "Are you okay?"

\- "Am I okay?" –I raised my voice slightly as I approached the wall, standing directly in front of him- "I came back for you, to help you and look where I've ended up. This is what I get for letting you in." –I rose my hands, annoyed- "Sheda was right."

\- "You've been with Sheda all this time?"

\- "Is that the thing that worries you the most about this whole situation?" -I crossed my hands over my chest- "Really, Blake?"

\- "Do you love him?" –he stood closer to me- "Is that why you let Pike shoot me?"

\- "I knew Pike would never kill his best sheep." –I rolled my eyes- "You should've known that too. You're loosing your edge."

\- "Do you love him?"

\- "Do you really think I want to spend my last hours talking about my feelings and the lives we could have lived if I had killed Pike when I had the chance?"

\- "You do." -he breathed out, assuming what he wanted to assume.

\- "I could never love Sheda the way I love you and if you had payed any attention to me you'd known that..." –I sighed- "But maybe I should, maybe none of this would have happened if I had left you alone to live your life, maybe you'd be okay if I hadn't been in your life... I told you I break people around me and I broke the person I loved most." –I felt a tear run down my cheek and I was quick to wipe it off.

\- "You loved me?" –his voice was shaky, eyebrows raised as his sad eyes looked at me- "In the past?"

\- "Don't twist my words, Bellamy. Its good enough you've twisted a knife in my heart."

\- "Sam..."

\- "Please, go." –I looked directly into his eyes- "If Pike sees us like this, he'll realize I've lied and this time he won't hesitate, he'll hurt you and I can't live with that..."

\- "I love you."

\- "You should go."

\- "Tell me you love me if you still mean it." -he placed his hand on the mesh in front of my face and he tried to reach me with his fingers but he couldn't.

\- "Tragically for both of us, you know I always will, but I need you to leave." -I touched his fingers with mine and he immediately squeezed them as best as he could- "Octavia can't lose us both to this. Please, Bell, go. Survive."

He looked around the cell before focusing his eyes back on me. Something had changed right then, I could see it in his eyes and the way he carried himself as he moved to the door and glanced at me one last time before leaving.  _He better not get himself killed, he better not have tricked me again..._


	14. Long live.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before the execution happens, everyone is thinking of a way to stop it; even Bellamy, who manages to set up a meeting with Octavia in hopes to save Sam. But, just because everyone puts their brain to it, it doesn’t mean it’ll happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: main character's death.

******HARPER'S POV**

I was in my room with Miller as we both had just found out that Sam had been caught and sent to lockup when someone knocked on the door. I looked at Miller as we both rose from the bed, thinking whether we had been caught or not. He approached the door and opened it slowly, revealing Bellamy.

\- "What do you want?" –Miller frivolously asked him.

Bellamy made a sign with his hand for Miller to remain quiet as he also moved his head for him to let him in; Miller moved away from the door and Bellamy came inside followed by Monty who closed the door after him.

\- "What do you...?"

Miller started again but Bellamy placed a finger to his mouth, commanding him to stay quiet; he took a knife from his pocket and moved it towards Miller as we both reached for our guns. I wasn't sure I trusted them anymore and I was even more confused about what they were doing here; after all, Bellamy had been the one to lock Sam up. Bellamy approached Miller and cut a part of his jacket revealing a bug. I scoffed, realizing how everyone on our side had been caught.  _They really have been spying on us._

\- "The bag blocks the signal." –Monty explained as he put the bug away and I scoffed annoyed once more- "Now we can talk."

\- "Who put it in there?" –Miller asked.

\- "That's not important right now." –Bellamy was quick to brush his question away- "Pike just sentenced Lincoln, Sinclair and Sam to death alongside Kane."

\- "Are you trying to scare us?" –Miller asked him- "Why do you care now?"

\- "Now you care about Sam?" –I scoffed- "You're the one who put her there."

\- "I know, alright? I know I should have stood up for her when Pike made that guard shoot her, I know I should have gone out to find her, I know I should have never stopped her when you guys let her in, I'm trying to make this right now."

\- "We're here to help." –Monty looked at me- "I'm sure you have a plan to break them out. What can we do?"

\- "What are you talking about?"

\- "Harper, come on."

\- "Look, we can help from the inside to pull this off." –Bellamy glanced between Miller and I- "We need people to hand them off to on the outside. I know Sam wasn't alone."

\- "We seriously don't know what you're talking about."

\- "You think we want them to die?" –Monty looked at Miller as he spoke and then at me.

\- "You know what? Forget it. If my sister wants to save Lincoln and Sam's lives, you tell her to meet me at the dropship in an hour."

Bellamy ended, took back his knife and left the room, closing the door and leaving Monty alone with us; he looked so lost, like a deer in headlights.

\- "After everything we've been through..." –he faced me- "...you don't trust me?"

\- "Does your mom know you're here, Monty?" –I crossed my arms over my chest well aware of the negative answer.

****━━━━━━━━**   
**

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

\- "It's taking her way too long." –I was pacing from one side to another in the clearing where Sam had left me with Sheda- "Something's wrong, I can feel it."

\- "I'm worried too but, without intel, there's nothing we can do."

\- "Anyone read me?"

\- "Harper!" –I took the walkie so fast I almost dropped it- "What happened, where's Sam?"

\- "Bellamy locked her up."

\- "He did what?!" –I tried not to yell as Sheda rose from the ground and moved next to me- "What happened?"

\- "We don't have time. Bellamy came by a couple minutes ago and said that if you want to save Sam and Lincoln, you have to meet him at the dropship in an hour."

\- "Can we trust him?"

\- "I don't know, he said he wanted to help. There's something else, Octavia."

\- "What?"

\- "Pike plans on executing Kane, Sinclair, Lincoln and Sam at dawn."

\- "No, no, no, this is not happening." –I let go off the walkie and, before it fell to the ground, Sheda took it.

\- "Mmm hello? I'm Sheda, Sam's friend." –he hesitated for a second- "What can we do to save her? Them?"

\- "Bellamy says he wants to meet with Octavia, he seems to have a plan."

\- "We will."

\- "Good luck. If anything else happens, we'll let you know. Over."

I moved back next to Sheda and put the walkie away, turning to look over Arkadia.

\- "I'll go meet him."

\- "I'm going with you."

\- "No." –I faced him- "If he sees you, he could try something."

\- "He won't see me." –he reassured me- "I can't stay back, not knowing what's going to happen to Sam after your brother tricked her."

\- "Okay, but stay hidden." –I turned to walk towards Selene since Helios was still inside Arkadia- "I have to tell Indra."

\- "Let's go then."

As I made it to the dropship I made sure that Sheda stayed behind so that Bellamy wouldn't see him. And also because I didn't want them to get into a fight before we got Sam and Lincoln out of there. We had to be fast or else I knew Sam would think of something on her own that'd get her killed for sure this time. I got down from Selene as I eyed my surroundings when Bellamy came into the moonlight from the shadows as it started to rain.

\- "I'm alone, O." –I eyed him- "I'm here to help."

And I knew what I had to do; I smiled at him as I opened my arms as if I were to hug him and he went to reciprocate the move; when I was close enough, I pulled out a syringe and sank it on the side of his neck.

\- "Sleep well, big brother." –I let go of it as Bellamy fell limp over me- "Sheda, a little help!"

****━** ** ****━━━━━━━━** **

**BELLAMY'S POV**

I woke up in a cave, hands and feet tied up to make sure I couldn't move. As my eyes got used to the light in there, I discerned three figures.

\- "It was a mistake to bring him here." –Indra was the first to speak.

\- "He was out the whole way." –O was next as she paced the cave- "And I've searched him for bugs."

\- "You think I'd let them hurt you?"

\- "You let them hurt Sam." –Sheda spat- "Twice. I don't understand what she sees in you; she trusted you again and..."

\- "Sheda, we've talked about this." –O placed her hand over his shoulder and he moved back mumbling something in Trig I didn't get.

\- "We're wasting time with him." –Indra spoke now- "You should be in their camp by now."

\- "No, it's suicide." –I cut them off- "Pike will be expecting you, you won't get close. I can."

\- "Sam got close enough before you knocked her out." –O squatted in front of me- "How's that helping us, big brother?"

\- "It was a mistake, I know that now." –I pleaded- "We can save them but we have to work together."

\- "You're the reason they need saving." –Octavia's voice was full of anger, rage and poison as it hit my ears.

\- "Maybe." –I whispered as I felt the tears in my eyes- "But that doesn't change the fact that you need me."

\- "For the first time in my life, that's not true." –she rose from in front of me- "I don't need you. We don't need you."

She eyed me up and down, making sure I understood the real meaning of those words before she turned to Sheda and signaled the exit with her head; Sheda nodded and walked with her outside of the cave as I screamed for her, but it was in vain; she was gone.

****━━━━━━**   
**

**SAM'S POV**

Pike had been as so kind as to let us get visits before he put a bullet to our heads. Once it was my turn, I didn't expect anyone to come but, to my surprised, two guards tied me up and then Pike took me to an isolated room.

\- "Jasper!" –I smiled as I saw him- "Thank you for coming."

He rushed towards me and hugged me as he started crying; I got angry at the guards for not taking away the ties from my hands so that I could hug him too once last time.

\- "We have to do something."

\- "Don't." –I begged him as he pulled away- "I don't want you to get hurt or worse for trying to help me. I got myself into this mess."

\- "How?"

\- "It seems I haven't learned my lesson and decided to listen to Bellamy. He knocked me out and... well, here we are."

\- "You don't deserve this, Sam."

\- "No one does, J. Listen, if you ever need help from outside, try to contact Sheda, alright?" –I moved my tied hands to his face to make sure he understood- "He's my friend, he'll help you out if you ever need it, alright?"

\- "I need you to stay alive."

\- "I'm not dead yet, J." –I smiled- "Who knows, maybe I'll get some dumb idea to save us all."

\- "I hope so." –he smiled slightly- "I... well..."

\- "You can tell me anything, J."

\- "I told Jaha about you."

\- "Oh, fuck, it's true. What was that about?"

\- "He'll tell you himself, he wanted to speak with you."

\- "Wait what?"

\- "Time's over for you." –a guard came in and pulled Jasper away from me.

\- "See you later, Sam."

\- "We'll meet again, J. I promise... stay alive."

I wasn't sure if I was ever going to see him again for things weren't looking particularly bright for any of us right now, but I needed to believe it. As Jasper disappeared through the door, Jaha walked through it.

\- "Samantha. I'm glad I could get a hold of you."

\- "Well, it's not like I can go anywhere." –I rose my hands, showing him my ties- "What do you want? Why did you come back? Where's Murphy?"

\- "Too many questions for so little time." –he sat down in front of me on the table- "I came back to save my people."

\- "Well, no offense but you're a month late for that. I'm sure shit wouldn't have gone this bad if you'd been Chancellor and that is saying a lot." –I tried to cross my arms over my chest but I couldn't so I sighed annoyed.

\- "We free the mind to save our people from pain."

\- "And how exactly do we do that now? Because I'll buy it right now."

\- "With this." –he handed me a small pill- "You take it, you enter to the City of Light."

\- "What is the City of Light?" –I asked curiously as I inspected the pill.

\- "Salvation and relief."

\- "How's a pill going to do that?" –I scoffed- "What type of bullshit are you selling me now? I'm getting executed in a couple hours and you want me to shallow that? For what?"

\- "Your pain, it's not physical but mental. The loss of loved ones, living with their deaths knowing you don't deserve this life and they did, the betrayal, the..."

\- "Stop!" –I yelled- "What do you know about pain, Jaha?"

\- "I know you've suffered far too much for how young you are."

\- "Well, half of that's on you so..." –I eyed him, his face only showing one emotion: calmness- "What happened to you? You were so demanding all the time, so eager to be in charge of everything, how come you haven't kicked Pike out?"

\- "I don't feel rage or need to be over anyone. I took the key and now I'm free."

\- "If it changed you that much, it sure does something."

\- "Raven took it."

\- "Does she know I'm here?"

\- "No."

\- "That's probably for the best, I don't want to cause her any more pain."

\- "There's no pain in the City of Light, Samantha."

\- "Time's up." –the guard from before entered the room.

\- "Think about it. All the pain you feel, gone forever." –he approached me, taking the pill from my hands and placing it in one of my pockets so that I wouldn't lose it and no one could take it away from me- "We'll be there once you take it."

\- "We?"

\- "You'll see."

And with that, he exited the room, leaving me more confused than I was the first second I saw him.  _City of Light, is this some type of metaphorical biblical shit or like an actual place you can go to? Take away my pain? But what am I without it at this point?_  I was deep in thought as the guard guided me to lockup again and untied me before I went inside.  _I'm going to die, why would I take all I am away from me now?_

\- "Who came to see you?" –Sinclair was quick to ask, interrupting my train of thought.

\- "Jasper and Jaha."

\- "Jaha?"

\- "Don't look at me, I was as shocked as you when he walked in the room."

\- "What did he want?"

\- "He was talking about something called 'the City of Light'...?"

\- "Did you take the pill?" –Kane rose immediately from the floor and placed his hands on my upper arms as if he were to shake me.

\- "No, calm down." -I pushed him away- "I'm not even sure what he was talking about. Besides, it's a little late to let go of the pain, don't you think?" –I sat down on the middle of the room- "But can you imagine? Not feeling any pain? You get shot? No problem, you don't feel that. A broken heart? Not an issue whatsoever." –I closed my eyes as I laid down- "That'd have been useful a month ago."

\- "Sam..." –Lincoln started but I stopped him.

\- "No, I don't want to talk about it. Yes, I'm fine. No, I don't want to spend my last hours crying over anyone."

I heard Lincoln chuckle softly and someone sitting down, I assumed it was Kane going back to where he had been when I entered the room.

\- "Could have worked." –I heard Lincoln speak a couple hours later.

I opened my eyes to see Pike tracing the mark of the coalition on his arm.

\- "Death can be an act of unity too." –Kane answered- "We don't break." –he turned to look at Sinclair- "We don't show fear." –he landed his eyes on me as I sat down again- "We stand up for what's right." –he looked at the mark again- "The people will remember."

I was about to scold him for giving up so fast when the doors to lock up opened.

\- "Chancellor on deck." –a guard spoke as I rolled my eyes.

\- "It's time."

Every Grounder around us got up, scared and moving back to the walls as Lincoln rose from his seat and tried to calm them down. Skyla looked at me and I nodded.

\- "Emo laik hir gon osir. Yu na kik thru." [They are here for us. You will survive.]

\- "Hashta yu? [What about you.]

\- "Nou krei lottau disha gou." [Not so lucky this time.] –I smiled- "Nou gon daun emo, beja. Sheda na kom op gon yu." [Don't fight them, please. Sheda will come for you.]

She nodded, still unsure as the doors to the cell opened and a bunch of guards with guns entered, making sure the Grounders stood to the walls as Pike walked towards us followed by another four guards.

\- "Go, go."

He instructed them and each of them moved to one of us and tied us from hands and feet.  _We could have fought this, we'd have made it out._  They started pulling us outside, first Sinclair, then Lincoln, Kane and me. As we were walking down the hallways, Harper walked past us and crossed eyes with me.  _Oh, no._

\- "Make way!" –Pike looked at her.

\- "Yes, sir, Mr. Chancellor."

I had to control my laugh but I couldn't.  _Who gave a fuck at this point, honestly?_  Pike looked at me.

\- "What? You don't expect me to lose my sense of humor just because of these, right?" –I rose my hands, referring to the handcuffs- "Where's Bellamy? Did you kill him after all, or is he on another mission to kill more innocent people?"

\- "Samantha..." –Kane turned his face to look at me and shook his face.

\- "Whatever, Chancellor Kane." –I mocked as we kept walking.

As we kept walking, Pike's walkie went off with Hannah's voice on it.

\- "Sir, you were right. Octavia Blake is here and she's not alone."

\- "On their knees." –Pike commanded as Hannah stopped speaking and the three men obeyed.

\- "If you touch my sister." –I stood still- "I will kill you."

\- "Get her on her knees."

A guard kicked me on the legs, making me lose balance as I landed on my knees and hands while Pike asked for Octavia's location.  _If she doesn't want you to find her, you won't, that's for sure._

\- "Sir, we can assume her friends have already told her where we're taking them." –Bryan spoke- "We shouldn't go any further till we know the route's secure."

\- "Please, tell me again what Miller sees on you, because I still don't get it." –I rolled my eyes- "As for you Pike, there are not many places for a public execution so no one needs intel for that."

Pike eyed me before looking at everyone else and around us.

\- "Put them in there." –he signaled to one of the rooms around us- "Come on, let's go."

\- "Uh, now I get to take a nap? Sweet." –I smiled as the guard pushed me inside a dorm- "Take all the time you need, Pike." –I chuckled, lying on one of the beds as they closed the door, locking us inside.

\- "You need to stop that." –Kane scolded me.

\- "Or what? He'll kill us? Flash news, Kane, it's execution day for all of us. I might as well make fun of him until the bullet gets stuck in my brain."

\- "They could hurt Octavia."

\- "It's been months and, still to this day Lincoln, you haven't realized if Octavia doesn't want to be found, she won't."

\- "You're too calm considering our options, why?"

\- "I saw Harper, I know they have a plan. Relax."

At that exact moment, a couple thuds were heard behind the door before it opened, revealing my sister.

\- "See? I told you. Have a little faith." –I smiled as Octavia came inside and closed the door behind her slightly.

\- "No time for reunions." –she moved towards the middle of the room and moved one of the panels on the ground- "Everyone inside. Now."

The four of us did as told, quickly being followed by Octavia who handed us the guards weapons before entering herself and closing the panel again. We waited and waited for what seemed like hours in that small uncomfortable place, until we heard noise over us. Pike was back and they were looking through the door before a banging noise hit our ears.

\- "Damn!" –Pike yelled- "We did what they wanted us to do." –his voice started to get lower and distant as footsteps accompanied it outside the room- "That won't happen again."

After a couple more minutes to make sure everyone over us had left, Octavia opened the panel again and we all got out as fast as we could.

\- "It's a little tight in there." –Kane commented as he got out.

\- "Try doing that for 16 years." –Octavia answered him as she cut his ties and moving to Lincoln as I helped Sinclair put the panel back.

She then cut Sinclair's ties as Abbie and Miller came to our aid and I realized Bryan was in on this one.  _Now that was unexpected._

\- "I need to cut those, sister." –Octavia placed her hand on my shoulder.

\- "About damn time, sister." –I chuckled.

\- "Sheda is so worried about you, he's waiting at our exit. He's ready to come in and fight if we need him."

\- "That does sound a lot like Sheda." –I smiled.

I nodded as Miller approached me with Bryan and the handed me my many weapons and Harper's gun.

\- "Thank you." –I said to both before focusing on Bryan- "I'm glad you're back on the right side."

\- "Me too."

\- "What about everyone else?" –I asked and they shrugged their shoulders.

\- "Bellamy's on a cave with Indra." -Octavia looked at me as I raised a questioning eyebrow- "I knocked him out when he came to meet me in case he was trying something."

\- "Okay, S, come in." –Harper's voice came through the walkie.

\- "This wasn't in the plan. We used their frequencies so they could hear us." –she placed the walkie next to her mouth as I furrowed my eyebrows.

\- "Stay where you are." –Octavia looked worriedly at me as Harper spoke- "Repeat, stay where you are. The exit is not clear."

\- "How many guards?"

\- "Too many. I say stay put."

The radio went silent.

\- "If we have to fight them, I'll go out first."

\- "I can't let you do that." –Octavia stopped me.

\- "You get them out of here, O." –I placed my hand on her shoulder- "Pike wants me, I can distract him."

\- "Calling all guards, the prisoners are headed for the main gate. Over."

\- "Monty is part of this too?"

\- "No." –Octavia shook her head to my question.

\- "Guess he's with us after all." –Miller spoke next to the door.

\- "I could find out." –Kane offered.

\- "We don't know that." –Abbie stopped him- "What we do know is we have to move."

Abbie and Octavia where the first ones to get out of the room as we all followed towards the exit that Octavia and I had been using to get inside without getting noticed. Harper was there and, as she opened the door, Sheda's worried face lit up once he landed eyes on me as he got out.

\- "Sam!" –he hugged so tight I thought I'd stop breathing- "I was so worried I'd lost you."

\- "Relax." –I punched him lightly on the chest as he let go of me- "I had everything under control."

\- "Next time, I'm coming with you." –he kissed my forehead.

\- "Wouldn't you like that?"

\- "Yes."

A woman's voice announced an emergency lockdown as we started to move out of there.

\- "I have a message for the traitors in this camp." –Pike's voice startled us as it came through Octavia's walkie- "There will be an execution today. Either turn yourselves in or the other Grounder prisoners will die in your place."

\- "We have to go, now." –Sheda pushed me back as Octavia did the same with Lincoln.

\- "I can't do that. I promised Skyla they were safe, I'm not leaving and making them take my place." –I pushed away from Sheda, moving towards the hallway, ready to fight Pike.

\- "Sam, I can't let you do that."

\- "Good thing I don't take..." –I felt a prick on the side of my neck and I drove off to sleep as I collapsed back in Sheda's arms.

****━━━━━━━**   
**

**SHEDA'S POV**

I had to do it. I couldn't let her go back to die. Lincoln did the same with Octavia and asked Kane to get her out of there.

\- "Take care of them, of each other."

I nodded at Lincoln before making my way out of there with Sam in my arms through the tunnels. The girls didn't wake up until we were away from Arkadia, Sam being the first to open her eyes.

\- "What...?" –she started as she opened her eyes, looking up at me- "What did you do!" –she yelled getting rid of me and falling to the ground.

\- "Sam... please."

\- "Lincoln..." –Octavia fell from the horse as she whispered his name.

The both of them made eye contact and that was enough for all of us to understand not to get in their way. They crawled through the ground until they managed to get on their knees, helping each other and getting towards a high point from where we could see the outside of Arkadia. Pike was out there with a couple guards and Lincoln all tied up.

\- "No!"

Sam rose to her feet and tried to make a run for it, but the drug was still on her system and she fell to the floor. Octavia stood still next to her and Kane moved behind her and I helped Sam up again.

\- "No..." –Octavia's voice was no more than a whisper, shaky as Lincoln got on his knees.

\- "Give me a rifle, something! We can save him... We can kill Pike from here! Please, Sheda!"

Sam fought me but she was weak. I held her as I looked at the sisters; they were so similar yet so different at the same time: they were both in pain but Octavia was being much more composed about it and dealing with it internally; she was like a river: calm on the surface but digging out the ground it flows through. Sam, however, was like a fire: burning everything around her and consuming herself as she did.

\- "Let me go! I have to go, I can't..."

Sam's voice got stuck in her throat as we heard it: a single shot. I looked up again in time to see Lincoln's body hitting the ground. Octavia stood still, clenching her jaw and straightening herself whereas Sam collapsed on my arms as her legs gave up.

\- "This is my fault..." -Sam muttered- "This is my fault, this is my fault, I've killed Lincoln. That should've been me." –she pushed me away and fell to the ground again- "Why did you stop me, why..."

Sam broke down in tears as Octavia lowered beside her and hugged her, making Sam instantly calm down.

\- "Disha won ste nou ona yu, biga sis." –Octavia whispered loud enough for me to catch it- "Oso dula op disha ogeda nau." [This one's not on you, big sister. We do this together now."

\- "Ogeda." -Sam nodded slightly after a moment- "Oso na frag op Pike." [Together. We will kill Pike.]

Octavia kissed Sam's forehead before moving back with Kane, I lowered next to Sam as she kept her gaze on her hands.

\- "Sam, we have to go."

\- "I can't keep going like this, Sheda." –she looked up at me, her eyes clear and glassy- "Promise me you'll stay with me."

\- "I'm not going anywhere."

\- "Promise me."

\- "I promise you, Sam."

She hugged me, resting her chin on my shoulder and wrapping her arms around my neck, an opportunity I took to raise from the ground with her in my arms as we started to make our way back to the cave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long live the one who truly deserved better.


	15. "Wich nou in".

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group makes it back to the cave where they learn of Lexa’s death and the risen of a new Commander. Bellamy learns of Lincolns dead and Monty seems to be in trouble. What else could go wrong at this point?

**BELLAMY'S POV**

Indra had left hours ago when she heard the horn announcing a new Commander had risen, leaving me alone in the cave still handcuffed. As the morning went by, I heard footsteps at the entrance of the cave, so I rose up. The first to come in were Harper, Miller, and Bryan with tired looks on their faces; when Harper landed her eyes on me I knew something was wrong.  _Octavia. Sam, not again._  Sinclair was next, looking at the ground as he walked past me, followed by a defeated Kane and Octavia with her sword on her hands, eyes glued to it. Sheda was the last to come inside carrying Sam in his arms and I felt both relieved and jealous at the sight; then, I realized.

\- "Where's Lincoln?"

Sheda walked past me, narrowing his eyes as we made eye contact; Sam was holding onto his neck and had her head buried in his chest and her eyes remained closed, if she was awake, she completely ignored my presence and that hurt. I wanted to move towards them, to check if Sam was alright but Octavia's voice stopped me.

\- "Pike put a bullet in his brain." –she let go of the sword and took off her jacket as she started sobbing.

\- "O... O, I am so sorry."

Before I knew it, Octavia's fist collapsed with my jaw with all her strength; I could feel her pain.  _This is not how I wanted things to go._  I looked at her once more and soon enough she started punching me again, harder each time as I started to bleed.

\- "Octavia, that's enough."

\- "Kane, stay out of this."

I warned him and he looked down right before I received another hit; she wasn't containing herself and soon enough the hits got lower until she hit my stomach and I fell to the ground, but she wasn't done; she pulled me up by my hair and held me up with both hands on the collar of my jacket as she started using her knees to cause some more damage on my abdomen and lower body. I feel to the ground once more and this time, Miller tried to move Octavia away from me but she pushed him away.

\- "Miller, back off."

I spat some blood as I prompted him before he got hurt too; I glanced at O once more, she was covered in my blood now and tears were running down her face as she sobbed loudly. She screamed before hitting my jaw once, twice, thrice...

\- "You're dead to me!" –Octavia ended with tears in her eyes as I laid on the ground looking up at her, my face covered in my blood as well as her hands- "All yours." –she looked at Sam that had made her way next to us, completely unintimidated by O unlike everyone else in the cave- "You can kill him if that's what you need, it's not like I care nor would I blame you..." –she looked at me as she ended- "After all, if Sheda hadn't stopped you, that'd have been you too."

I looked at Octavia leave with my blood on her hands and tears in her eyes when I felt Sam lower next to me; I moved my face to see her and I let my eyes study every millimeter of her face: her war paint was long gone now, faded with the time and the tears I knew she had spilled for her eyes were red and puffy; a bruise was starting to form on the left side of her jaw and she had a small one on the same side of her neck.

\- "Pike ordered a guard to hit me for not giving him answers and then Sheda put me to sleep so that I wouldn't follow Lincoln back into the ship." –she explained as if she could read my mind while she sat next to me, helping me sit up straight.

\- "Aren't you going to end me?"

\- "No." –she spoke softly- "O has gotten you for both of us today... she's lost her soulmate; had that been you, I'd have killed everyone in there." –she sighed as my eyes widened- "If she really wanted you dead, we wouldn't be having this conversation."

\- "What happened?" –I turned to face her.

\- "We were almost out when Pike announced he'd kill every Grounder in Arkadia if we didn't turn ourselves in. Sinclair was already out and Kane was leaving but I turned around to go back inside with Lincoln; Sheda asked me not to and when I was about to tell him I don't take orders from anyone, he put me to sleep." –she touched the side of her neck before looking down- "When I woke up, I was on his arms and far from Arkadia, but not far enough not to see Lincoln tied up and on his knees; Pike shot him while O and I watched powerlessly as he pulled the trigger and my brother fell to the ground, dead. I've felt powerless a lot of times in my life but today... that bullet was meant for me. Lincoln deserved so much better than this." -she clenched her fists- "Sheda should have put him to sleep and let me handle things... everything would have been better."

\- "Don't say that..."

\- "I just did and I mean it." –she turned her face to watch O pacing around the cave- "I'm sure it had been easier if that had been me."

\- "How can you think like that, Sam?"

\- "Because you've mourned me once and no one got hurt after it."

\- "O would have killed me if you'd died today."

\- "And she'd been right, I was in lockup because you put me there."

\- "You were trying to kill Pike."

\- "First of all, if I had wanted to kill him, he'd had been dead; I was getting him outside because I had a deal with my people. Second of all, I was doing what is right. I can't believe after everything that's happened today you're still on his fucking side!" –she rose abruptly from beside me- "What's wrong with you?"

\- "The Grounders want us dead." -I looked up at her- "We had to get rid of them before they attacked us."

\- "Then next time you're out there with a rifle killing Grounders for sport, make sure you put a bullet through my heart; I'm sure you're not as much of a pathetic shooter as that guard was."

\- "That's not what I meant..."

\- "I'm Jusheda, I am a Grounder. Deal with it, SkyBoy." –she threw a wet cloth in front of me- "I came here to help you because, even if you've hurt me, I hate seeing you like this, covered in your own blood, but that's better than seeing you covered in the blood of my friends, of my family... I can't stand by you anymore, Bellamy; I've really tried to help you, to see your point and make you understand mine but I don't know what's gotten into you; you and I are not on the same side anymore and I..."

\- "Don't do this, I love you..."

I quickly cut her off, I didn't want her to end that sentence.  _Yeah, we don't see eye to eye right now, but that doesn't mean I want her out of my life. She's my family, my home; I..._

\- "The last time you said those three damn words to me, you almost got me executed." -her voice interrupted my thoughts- "I haven't done anything, you pushed me away when you stopped trusting me."

\- "Don't end what we have."

\- "I'm ending what you destroyed."

And with that, she left me there. As I looked around, I realized everyone had heard our conversation and my stomach turned upside down. If Sam didn't trust me, no one there would.  _Fuck._

**\---------------**

**SAM'S POV**

_I really thought Bellamy was back on the right side when Octavia explained to me he had contacted her to help us; I had wondered why she didn't trust him at the time and now I could see why... He didn't try to help us because he knew Pike was wrong, he tried because he didn't want anyone to hold our deaths over his head. And I fell for it like a fucking idiot. When will I learn?_  I sat down next to Sheda who held me close as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders, allowing me to rest my head on his shoulder.

\- "You okay?" –he whispered rubbing his thumb over my jacket.

\- "No." –I answered honestly- "But I'll be. I just need to end this and leave."

\- "You should move in with us." –I could feel the smile on his face- "Lila would love that, she's taken a liking to you."

\- "She hasn't just 'taken a liking to me'..." –I chuckled- "...she adores me."

\- "Really? How's that?"

\- "Because I let her explore her playful and artistic side as well as teaching her to fight and defend herself."

\- "That explains a lot of things." –he laughed- "I'm serious, Sam, you could live with us."

\- "I honestly wouldn't mind that but let's end this war first, okay?"

\- "We will." –he squeezed my shoulder- "Now rest; it's been a long day."

I easily drifted off to sleep. I don't know how long had it been since I had had a decent night of sleep but it couldn't have been that long for I woke up with the sun still outside, hearing Bryan speaking.

\- "I say we run two-man patrols round the clock starting now."

\- "We'll do that." –Kane answered- "But we should be safe here. The Grounder blockade is too close for Pike to risk looking for us."

\- "Yeah, but are we safe from the blockade?"

\- "As long as we stay on this side on the line we should be."

\- "They are Grounders, you really think they're going to play by the rules?" –Bryan asked unsure as I felt Sheda tense beside me.

\- "No offense Bryan but we've been playing by the rules all the time..." -I rose my head from Sheda's shoulder- "You people are the ones who didn't and that's how we all got into this big mess."

\- "Sam's right." –Miller nodded at me and looked at Bryan- "Pike would want you dead now too. We take him out, we can go home."

\- "We take him out, then the Grounders lift the blockade."

\- "That's right." –Kane agreed with Harper- "And we become the 13th clan again. Those were the terms."

\- "Lexa's terms." –Sinclair reminded us as he looked around the cave- "If what Bellamy says is true and she's dead, how do we know the next Commander will honor them?"

\- "Because if they don't, I'll kill them."

\- "You're not trained for that, Sam."

\- "Well, I don't see you having a better idea, Sheda." –I faced him- "What makes you think that new Commander won't kill us all? Won't kill me?"

\- "You're Jusheda, honorary member of Trikru..."

\- "Yeah, but for how long? Clarke's Wanheda and that didn't stop the clans from trying to kill her, did it?" –I shook my head and rose from where I was sat with the full intention of leaving the cave for a walk.

\- "One problem at a time." –Kane pleaded.

\- "And what about Clarke?" –Miller questioned- "With Lexa gone, she's not safe at Polis."

\- "Clarke made her choice." –Octavia sank her knife on the ground with all her force just as I walked past her- "The only thing that matters now is killing Pike."

\- "And we'll have to do it ourselves." –I stood beside her and she glanced up at me- "He killed our own, his blood will run for it." –I squeezed her shoulder and she rose a hand to squeeze mine- "My deal with the Twelve Clans is done for."

\- "Once we resume our place in the Commander's coalition Clarke will be safe." –Kane kept talking ignoring us both- "So, how do we do it?"

I was about to speak my mind once again when Bellamy's walkie turned on.

\- "Bellamy, come in. It's Monty, I'm in trouble. Please, say you still have your radio."

My head shot almost involuntarily towards where the walkie had been sitting all this time. Sinclair took it and handed it to Kane before warning him.

\- "If we respond and Pike's listening..."

\- "Go to Channel 7." –Bellamy advised from behind us as we looked at him- "That's seven words after the word 'trouble'."

\- "And why exactly should we trust you?"

I faced him completely. Any other time I'd have moved without asking but now even asking him I felt unsure; I hated feeling like that, I had trusted him with my whole being and now...

\- "It's code, go to seven. Sam, trust me, please."

He nodded at me slightly and I couldn't say no as I turned to look at Kane who still looked very unsure.  _If Monty's in trouble I have to help him, he's in the middle of this because he's trying to be a good son...I can't let Pike hurt him too for doing what's right after all this time._

\- "I'll speak, give me the radio."

\- "Sam..."

\- "If Pike's listening and has something in mind for us, I have a higher chance of getting rid of him on a fight than any of you and we all know it. I already did once." –I extended my arm towards Sinclair- "I like Monty, I'll handle this."

\- "Bellamy, are you there?" –Monty spoke again as Sinclair handed me the radio.

\- "Monty, it's Sam. What happened now?"

\- "Pike knows that I helped you get out."

_Fuck._

\- "Can you get to the dropship? I'll meet you there and I'll take you somewhere safe away from that asshole. "

\- "I... I think so."

\- "I'll see you there. Over."

I threw the radio at Sinclair who easily caught it as I took my weapons rushing to leave the cave.

\- "Wait, what if it's a trap and Pike's waiting?" –Harper grabbed my arm and pulled me down.

\- "It'll be my most enormous pleasure to torture him to death." –I reassured her.

\- "I'm going with you." –Octavia looked up at me as she put her knife away.

\- "Counted on it, stristis." – [Little sister] I offered her my hand to rise from the ground- "The last stroke is yours."

\- "I'm not leaving you alone." –Sheda rose and walked next to us.

\- "I'm coming too." –Miller rose too, taking his things- "Monty saved our lives."

\- "You can't all come." –Kane stopped us all- "If it's a trap we can't all march right into it."

\- "What makes you think you're in charge?" –I crossed my arms over my chest- "I spoke with Monty, I'm going."

\- "To stop me..." –Octavia glanced at me as she put on her jacket- "...you're gonna have to kill me."

\- "They hope it's a trap." -Bellamy almost breathed out behind us.

\- "And if you're part of it..." –I glanced at him as I turned to move away.

\- "He's coming too." –Octavia spoke and I turned to see her hardened expression.

\- "For what exactly? Baggage is the last thing we need right now, O."

\- "We'll need a hostage to trade for Monty."

\- "I know you're mad but would you trade your brother for Monty?"

\- "Wouldn't you?"

\- "I'd never trade with your life."

\- "I didn't mean a brother or sister's life, I mean his life."

\- "I wish I could say yes and be honest but I can't."

\- "He's the reason you got shot, the reason Lincoln's dead and the one who put Pike in charge."

\- "It's a good plan." –Kane agreed with O as he eyed me- "He stays chained."

\- "Sir, with all due respect..." –Miller started but Kane cut him off.

\- "He's the enemy." –he looked at me- "Gag him."

**\---------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

Kane ordered Sam to gag me as he agreed with Octavia to bring me hostage. I knew Sam was debating in her mind whether this was a good idea or not as she kept her jaw clenched; she turned to look at me sideways before sighing and addressing Kane.

\- "I don't take orders from anyone. You want him gagged? Do it yourself. But clean the blood before Pike sees him, we don't want him going more rogue than usual on us because we hurt his best sheep."

\- "Are you on his side?" –Octavia moved to Sam threateningly- "He didn't give a fuck when Pike tried to kill you, he killed Lincoln... he's waiting to betray us again! And this time you could actually die, Sam; Sheda and I could die!"

\- "I know hating him would make my life a hundred times easier right now and I wish I could just feel that way but I can't. He didn't pull the trigger, O." –Sam gulped- "Pike shot me because he knows I'm a threat and he's afraid of me, you know he's been using me against him and I'm honestly tired. And Lincoln... he died the day I decided to give Pike a chance. I knew he'd give me a headache as soon as I saw him the day we went to look for Clarke; I wanted to kill him as soon as I saw him but I didn't... Lincoln is dead because instead of listening to my gut I paid attention to my feelings and they've betrayed me. If I had taken Pike outside yesterday, Lincoln would still be alive. I can't bring my brother back but I'll make sure his executioner pays for it, and..." –she glanced at me- "...if he plays us again, I'll be the one to put a blade through his heart, even if that means I have to slit my throat after because I can't live with his blood on my hands."

And with that, Sam left the cave, leaving a speechless Octavia behind her and a group of startled Skaikru as I watched her leave with her threat and confession both in mind.  _After everything I've put her through, how can she not hate me? I hate myself for it._ Sheda was quick to go after her; I don't think I've ever felt my blood burning under my skin as badly as it did at that moment when I watched Sheda running after Sam with that look on his face and I realized he was more than a friend to Sam; or at least he was trying to be.

**\--------------**

**SAM'S POV**

\- "Monty?" –Kane asked as we got to the dropship but no one answered- "We got here first."

\- "Or it's an actual trap." –I rested my hands on my sword- "And here I am, without my bow."

\- "There's someone there." –Octavia pushed Bellamy in front of her as Kane took out his rifle- "Get outside, now!"

The cloth covering the entrance moved, revealing a tied-up Monty followed by a gun held by Pike.

\- "They followed me, I'm sorry."

\- "Let him go, Pike." –Kane asked as he eyed him through the snipper of his rifle.

\- "Can't do that."

He moved his walkie to his mouth and a couple seconds later, a shot landed at our feet, making all of us jump in our place.

\- "It's over, put down your weapons."

\- "Shoot him." –Octavia told Kane.

\- "Monty's in the shot."

\- "Give me the rifle, I'll do it." –another shot to our feet- "Kane!"

\- "Come on, Marcus. I promised Monty's mother I'd bring him home alive."

\- "Has anyone bothered asking Monty what he wants?" –I took a step in front of Octavia seeing as Kane was not going to give me the stupid rifle- "Let me go ahead and assume obviously none of you has. How's that for good parenting, huh?"

\- "Put down your weapons, Besnik. It's over."

\- "It'll be over once I get your blood on my hands."

Pike said something on his walkie again that I didn't quite get but then I heard the shoot and felt the blood in my arm, making me drop my blade.  _Damn these assholes and their fucking rifles._  I touched my upper arm, the wound was superficial. _They really need to train, it's a good thing the army was asleep or else they'd have lasted two seconds with this great aim they got going on._

\- "Give up, Besnik."

\- "Surrender's not in Jusheda's nature." –I took out another blade- "Who you got shooting this time, huh? They're even worse than the last."

\- "Kane, no." –I heard Octavia behind me and I turned around to see Kane leaving his rifle on the ground.

\- "And you came with us for this?" –I looked at him as I felt my blood burning- "To give up as soon as shit doesn't run smooth? Good, God Kane." –I shook my head- "I'll die before giving up."

\- "Now you two."

Octavia moved to Bellamy's other side and rose her sword to Bellamy's neck as Pike moved his walkie to his mouth, speaking loud enough this time for all of us to hear.

\- "One in Octavia's leg."

Before I could react, Bellamy got rid of Octavia's blade on his neck, knocking her to the ground and, as she rose her face, she looked at me and then glued her eyes to Bellamy. My blood froze and my heart stopped.

\- "I told you not to get on my bad side."

I moved my blade, determined to cut Bellamy's arm to free Octavia when I felt a rifle being shoved into my head. I was so focused on O and Bellamy I hadn't noticed we had been surrounded by Pike's people.

\- "Drop the knife."

The way I saw it there were two options and in both I most probably ended up dead: I either cut Bellamy, freeing Octavia and getting a bullet in my brain leaving her completely alone or I dropped the blade and allowed Pike's sheep to take me and wait for whatever he chose to do with us, still being with Octavia. Another shove of the rifle on my temple as I glanced at my sister made me realize I couldn't leave her alone; I dropped the knife and soon found myself handcuffed, yet again.  _Wich nou in. [Trust no one]_ Pike approached us, taking Octavia's sword and both my blades before eyeing Bellamy.

\- "You don't look so good."

\- "I'm fine."

Bellamy was still tied up as he spoke with Pike, his voice denoting no emotions, cold as it had ever been.

\- "You have five seconds to make me believe you're still with me."

\- "All the others are in a cave not far away from here."

Octavia started screaming, getting rid of the guard that was holding her still and moving towards Bellamy when I saw a guard take out a shock baton. I got rid of the guard holding me still and jumped over the one following Octavia, kicking him on the legs and making him fall to the ground with me before he hit me with the baton instead and everything went black.

**\-------------------**

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

A guard punched me back before I could get to Bellamy and I fell to the floor. Sam was lying there with her eyes closed as a guard got up from next to her, baton in his hand as he massaged his legs and I realized what happened; she had tried to protect me and had gotten herself hurt for it.

\- "Sam." –I whispered- "Wake up, I need you."

I glanced around me, seeing a couple guards had surrounded both of us and were pointing their weapons at us.  _So brave._  I wanted to touch Sam's face but my ties wouldn't allow it and I was afraid if she didn't wake up soon, Pike would leave her there or execute her in the spot.

\- "Sam, come on."

\- "It won't be long." -the arrogant tone of the guard with the baton sounded beside me and I really felt the urge to shut his mouth- "I didn't hit her with full force, she'd be dead if I had."

\- "If that's what you need to tell yourself, cool; you wouldn't be the first to assume I die easily." –Sam rolled to her side as she opened her eyes and focused on me- "I'm going to fucking kill someone once we get out of this one."

I smiled, forgetting for a second the situation we were in.

\- "Let's go!" –Pike ordered- "Gag them."

\- "Don't you like my snarky remarks?" –Sam scoffed as the guard pulled her up and before he managed to gag her.

\- "You won't have much to say once every traitor is dead before your eyes." –Pike moved next to us and eyed her.

Sam rolled her eyes since she couldn't speak now before Bellamy walked past us, his eyes moving from Sam to me as he did. I was so angry at Bellamy I almost overlooked how Sam must have been feeling. She didn't even look at him. I knew she was about to break and I truly hoped that wouldn't happen because, if it did, I was afraid I'd lose the most important person in my life right now. In that moment, I decided that, if we got out of this one, I'd try my best to be there for Sam as she had always been for me; I had lost Lincoln to a bullet but Sam had lost Bellamy to his own demons and I didn't know which was worse at this point.


	16. My scars are mine to bear.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellamy guides the group back to the cave so that Pike can arrest the rest of the traitors.

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

\- "Sure about the route?" –Pike moved to walk beside Bellamy- "We're getting close to the blockade line."

\- "That's why Kane set up out here, he didn't think we'd risk it."

\- "Well, he was wrong."

Sam's breathing became heavier as she heard them interact and I pushed her lightly to gain her attention as I shook my head; I knew she was thinking of something but I couldn't risk losing her too; she clenched her jaw and rolled her eyes at me before nodding slightly.

\- "What's gonna happen to my family?"

Bellamy asked out of nowhere and I swear Sam almost choked on her gag before she scoffed.  _Family? After what we've been through, we're family now again? Shocking._

\- "I know they have to answer for their crimes but..."

\- "I'll tell you what." –Pike cut him off- "For Octavia, I'll make you the same promise I made to Monty's mother: immunity from all past actions but if she screws up again..."

\- "Oh, she won't." –Bellamy cut him off this time- "I'll make sure of it."

Sam pushed me lightly and raised her eyebrows a couple of times while pointing at Bellamy with her head; I knew well what she meant:  _"you've got yourself a nanny, O."_  I could hear her voice in my head as she smiled as much as her gag allowed her; I rolled my eyes at her.  _Great. What a need is my brother, not a stupid babysitter._

\- "And Sam?"

\- "She's not your family son, she's the enemy. We'll proceed with her execution as it was planned before they managed to escape."

This time, Sam was the one who stopped me from running up to Pike and pushing him down to the ground; she shook her head at me as if saying  _"it's not worth it, O."_  but it was...

\- "Sir, she is my family; I'm in love..."

\- "I can always execute both of them if you prefer."

Sam whispered-screamed something unintelligible due to her gag, gaining Pike and Bellamy's attention. If looks could kill, they'd have dropped dead to the ground. Sam looked at Pike first, her eyes daggers before she turned to Bellamy; they looked at each other for a moment, Sam's eyes narrowed as if she were daring Bellamy to do something stupid so that she could make a move too.

\- "My sister, my responsibility."

Bellamy finally spoke with a mixture of sadness and determination that seemed to please Sam, who nodded in agreement as she visibly relaxed; not that I could share her relief because Pike was decided to get rid of her and, apparently, not even Bellamy could stop that.  _There has to be a way, something we can do to get out of this one alive._

**\--------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

After Pike pardoned my sister but refused to do the same with Sam, I knew what I had to do.

\- "Hold on." –Pike commanded everyone as we got almost to the blockade line.

\- "The cave's just on the other side."

I explained as he eyed me carefully, suspicious, but he chose to trust me anyway; I kept moving forward down the slope until I got to flat terrain again followed by the rest of the group. I wasn't armed but they were, so I kept looking at the trees, trying to see if there was anyone else there and, suddenly, they showed up. A horn sounded and everyone in our group panicked; well, not everyone, of course.

\- "The blockade!" –Pike yelled- "Anybody got eyes?"

\- "Nothing."

\- "Back to higher ground!"

Pike was fast to command and, as he turned around, I took the gun he kept on his belt and pointed it at him.

\- "Drop your weapon."

\- "What the hell are you doing?"

\- "Drop your weapon!"

I repeated myself, still pointing the gun at him when each guard moved to point their rifles at me; Octavia and Sam were fast to get rid of them, knocking them to the ground as I spoke again.

\- "We bring you Chancellor Pike of the Sky People." –I looked at Sam and O- "Translate."

Octavia eyed me before turning to Sam, who simply nodded as she got rid of her gag.

\- "Osir lid yo in Chansla Paik kom Skaikru!" –Octavia shouted.

\- "You've killed us all!" –Pike faced me.

\- "No." –Sam moved closer to the blockade line, walking past it with her head held high- "He's doing what's right for the first time in months, you just happen to be on the receiving end this time."

\- "Take him and lift the blockade."

I continued, not moving my eyes from Pike as Octavia kept translating my words; once she was done, Sam spoke.

\- "Ai laik Jusheda. Ai get in der ste a brana Heda, osir don dula osir dula." [I am Jusheda. I know there's a new Commander, but we've done our job."

Once she finished, every guard fell to the floor dead with an arrow to their chest and we were soon surrounded by Grounders. O was quick to take one of the guard's knives and approached Pike with the intention of killing him but Kane stopped her just in time.

\- "Hey, no." –I heard him speak- "The Grounders need him alive."

Octavia was quick to look around until she landed eyes on Sam.

\- "I want to kill him as much as you do, and that was the plan until we ended up at the blockade. I know you want to be the one to kill him, but I promise you he will suffer. My deal with Lexa was to end him as they planned on doing with Finn; maybe they'll let you end him since Lexa is dead now..."

\- "We can't kill him ourselves." –Kane looked at Sam shaking his head before facing Octavia again- "We won't get away with that again."

\- "Well, in that case..."

Pike looked at Sam before turning to me; he made a move, trying to get to Sam intending to hurt her knowing we couldn't hurt him, but an arrow on his arm stopped him; he fell to the ground and, as he tried to raise, another Grounder hit him in the head.

\- "Jusheda?" –the Grounder faced Sam.

\- "Sha." [Yes] –Sam stepped forward rising her still tied up hands- "Na yu hon daun gifa in kom disha? Den em ste yun." [Can you take care of this? Then he's yours] –she pointed at Pike.

\- "I'll do it."

\- "Sheda?" –Sam questioned as we all turned around- "I told you to stay back."

Sheda ran up to Sam carrying a bow and a quiver with arrows.  _He saved her._

\- "I followed you." –he cut her ties and held her to his chest- "Are you okay?"

\- "Yeah." –she nodded as she moved back to look at him- "Now care to explain how did you end up on the other side of the blockade?"

\- "I knew where the dropship was, so I let you go and gave you time to get there so that you wouldn't notice me but I was late; when I got there, they had you knocked down along with the rest tied up. I heard Bellamy say he'd take Pike to the cave so I followed you until I realized he was not going to the cave but towards the blockade; I crossed the line to inform of your imminent arrival and here we are."

\- "And I'm the one that never listens, huh?" –Sam rose her eyebrows at him as she spoke with a good-natured voice.

\- "You're welcome, kika." [Survivor]

\- "Whatever, amin." [Master, instructor...]

Sam rolled her eyes at Sheda but a smile remained on her face, which meant whatever they had just called each other was probably a nickname in Trig and I wanted to know.  _I've hurt her and she has every right to move on, I broke her trust and she ended our relationship. I'd give anything to get her back. I fucked up big-time._

\- "Jusheda." –the Grounder from before approached her and she turned around to face him- "Yu ste gon kom op kom yumi." [You're to come with us]

\- "Chomouda?" [Why]

\- "Yu souda kom op kom yumi gon Polis." [You must come with us to Polis.]

\- "Ai souda dula op bida diyo fos." [I have to do something first.] –she looked at Octavia who nodded in understanding as I was still left in the dark- "Oso don ban au bida won bakon." [We left someone behind.]

The Grounder didn't seem too convinced as he looked Sam up and down but she didn't move; if he was trying to scare her, he was doing a poor job. Sheda was quick to move in front of her and I saw the annoyance on her face as Sheda faced the Grounder.

\- "Ai na lid in em." [I'll bring her.]

\- "I don't need a babysitter, Sheda." –Sam scoffed pushing him away and looking at the Grounder- "I'll be there once I'm done here; I wouldn't miss meeting the new Heda. Maybe I'll even be there on time for his last breath."

Sam pointed at Pike with her head and the Grounder nodded; he made a sign for the others around us to take Pike and start moving when Kane stopped them.

\- "Where are you taking him?"

\- "To the new Commander."

\- "May I join you?" –he rose his sleeve- "We're the 13th clan."

\- "Don't slow us down." –the Grounder ended and started moving.

\- "Are you sure?" –Monty was quick to ask- "We know nothing about the new Commander."

\- "I'm sure." –Kane told us before looking at Sam- "Go home and tell our people what happened here."

\- "May I ask what do you expect me to do when Pike's assholes rebel against us? You don't honestly expect those brain-washed idiots to agree straight away, do you?"

\- "Samantha..."

\- "What?" –she crossed her arms over her chest- "I'm not saying anything you aren't thinking."

\- "Just... don't kill anyone else."

\- "I can't promise I won't defend myself." –Sam argued and Kane nodded- "Go to Polis and do whatever you have to do but now Arkadia is your problem, Kane."

\- "Tell Abbie I'll look out for Clarke."

Sam nodded and moved back to where O was followed by Sheda; I looked at them before facing Kane.

\- "Did you do this for your them...?" –he eyed me carefully as she pointed with his head at Sam and O- "...or because it was the right thing to do?"

\- "You're welcome." –I answered dryly and moved away.

\- "It matters." –Kane grabbed my arm, stopping me from going anywhere- "Until you see that you'll still be lost."

He ended and moved after the Grounders; I turned around to see Sheda looking at me warily while Sam and O took all the weapons the guards had been carrying with them.

\- "My mom turned me in." -Monty looked at me with a mix of emotions on his face and voice.

\- "You're family." –I patted him in the back and he nodded unconvinced- "We'll work it out."

I turned around when I heard one of the guards gasping for air; Sam was squatted next to him, checking the bullets left in his gun as he rose his face from the ground. She looked at him completely unbothered as Octavia rose her head from what she was doing and eyed Sam, almost asking for permission; when Sam acknowledged her and nodded, Octavia rose from the ground and stabbed the guard in the chest, killing him.

\- "Jus drein, jus daun." –Octavia recited as she looked at me.

\- "It's quite unfortunate it's just a sheep's one though." –Sam rose from the floor and looked around her, eyes surprised as she realized I had heard her- "Don't look at me like that." –she took a step towards me.

\- "Sam..." –Sheda moved after her- "He..."

\- "I don't need a babysitter, Sheda."

\- "But..."

\- "If he tries to kill me, you and I both know I can take care of myself."

\- "Yeah, and look where that got you last time." –he reproached her and grabbed her by the arm, making her face him; I tensed, clenching my fists at my sides- "Every time you've been about to die, it's been his fault."

\- "What...?" –Sam got rid of him- "What are you talking about now?"

\- "The day you burnt 300 warriors, the day you went into the Mountain alone, the day Pike shot you and yesterday when you almost got executed..." –Sheda enumerated each time as I had been doing myself since the explosion at Mount Weather- "You keep going back to him and you keep getting hurt! Why can't you see that?"

\- "Because each of those times, the decision was mine." –Sam pushed him back- "I chose to get out of the dropship, I chose to follow Emerson, I chose to get out of Arkadia and I chose to go back." -she emphasized each 'I' as if, if she didn't, Sheda wouldn't get it- "If I've ever gotten hurt it's because of my actions not because of anyone else's, so don't blame Bellamy; you wouldn't even know me if it weren't for him so apologize right now. I owe him my life." –Sam glanced at me and her eyes softened- "He's saved me more times than I care to admit and, if I were to go back in time, I'd do it all the same way. Well..." -she sighed- "I obviously would have killed Pike earlier and Lincoln would still be here." –she looked at the ground for a second before looking back at him- "I know what you're doing and I don't like it one bit, Sheda. I don't give a flying fuck about any stupid rivalry you both have going on since you met but leave me out of it; I'm not a price to be won by bringing the other down. Grow up."

I didn't understand exactly what was happening and even less why she was defending me; after all, Sheda was right.

\- "Accept my apologies." –Sheda looked at me- "I don't like who you've become but I know Sam's right. You've saved her again today, thank you for that." –I nodded at his words- "We should go back to the cave to let the rest know what happened here."

\- "Get going, we'll catch up." –Sam looked up at him and he nodded- "Thank you."

\- "Don't slow me down."

\- "When exactly has that ever happened?"

Sam chuckled as she watched Sheda leave and pick Octavia along the way before turning to me. I walked towards her.

\- "You okay?"

\- "I should be the one asking that."

\- "Because I was tied up and gagged?" –she smiled and I felt my own smile too- "You and I both know I've been worse." –her face turned serious- "You turned in Pike. Why?" –I looked away but she was quick to catch my chin in her hand, making me face her- "I need to know."

\- "He was going to execute you." –I looked into her eyes- "I couldn't let that happen." –she dropped her hand and closed her eyes- "Not again."

\- "Had you done that because you finally saw the light, you and I would have been the perfect team. Like we used to..."

\- "Sheda's right, you know?"

\- "No." –she looked into my eyes, piercing my soul- "I'm not having this conversation again with you for the billionth time; my choices are mine to bear, Blake, and so are all my scars."

\- "That's not true." –I lowered my gaze to her right hand.

\- "Well, this one is on both of us." –she smiled as she rose it, looking at her ring finger- "But you have one too so we're even."

**\----------------**

**_FLASHBACK_ **

I woke up that morning as the sun started to slip through our window. I slowly opened my eyes and stretched a bit before turning my face to look for Sam; she was still asleep with her back to me and her hair all over her face. I moved slowly not to disturb her until I was lying directly behind her, sliding an arm under her to pull her closer as I moved the hair away from her face with my other hand. I rose the sleeve of the t-shirt she was wearing until it revealed her shoulder; I caressed her arm, the warmth in my chest starting to grow as the seconds went by and I finally left an innocent kiss on her shoulder.

\- "I'm so lucky."

I knew Sam had had a hard training session with Sheda the day before so I wanted to let her sleep for as long as she wanted to. I carefully laid my head back on the pillow, holding her close to me and closing my eyes once more, letting my thoughts wander.  _I doubt we'd had been this happy if we had met in the Ark. Things back there would have been different, both of us probably expending all our day away from each other in our respective jobs...I can't imagine Sam being anything conventional, she probably would have had to choose some random job to get rations; that'd have consumed her... I wanted to be a guard, maybe I would have become one if... But how would have we managed to keep O a secret for all our lives? Of course, I'd have let Sam know and, knowing her, she'd have managed to get herself floated to save O. Maybe my mom... she'd have loved Sam..._

\- "Wanna share those thoughts with me, love?"

Sam's sleepy voice disrupted my train of thought, not that I could ever mind.

\- "How'd you know I was awake?"

\- "Well, you're running your fingers over my arms and your feet is rubbing against my leg." –she chuckled- "I don't think you'd do that asleep."

\- "Who knows." –I smiled- "Turn around, I want to kiss you."

\- "Uh, so demanding so early in our day."

She laughed and I shook my head faking being bothered by her words as she turned around to face me with a soft smile on her lips.

\- "I fall for you a bit more every day if that's even possible." –I pulled her to me only letting space for her to raise her head to look at me.

\- "Thank you for expressing my feelings out loud."

She wrapped her arm around my bare back and I lowered my face to hers so that I could finally kiss her; it was messy and short because she was still sleepy but I loved those types of kisses, they were so personal and lazy and yet they meant so much.

\- "My mom would have loved you."

\- "That's what you were thinking about?" –I nodded- "Oh, yeah." –she smiled- "I'm sure your mom would have been delighted to hear how you've fallen for a criminal, a murderer out of all the types you could have chosen from." –she chuckled.

\- "You're so much more than that, Sam. You're selfless, compassionate and gentle." –I kissed her nose as she closed her eyes- "You're honest, loyal and resourceful."

\- "Mmm." -she snuggled against my chest- "Please, tell me more. I quite enjoy being showered in compliments first thing in the morning."

\- "I know you do." –I chuckled- "You're also extremely stubborn, competitive and sarcastic."

\- "All good-traits, if you ask me." –she opened her eyes and looked into mine- "Didn't you get lucky?"

\- "I did." –I gave her a peck on the lips- "You're also pretty damn hot."

\- "Says you." –she kissed me- "I still don't think any parent would've approved of me."

She moved her hand to my hair and I hummed in contempt, closing my eyes and remaining silent for a moment as I enjoyed the feeling.

\- "You're a survivor, Sam." –I spoke again as I opened my eyes- "Just for that, I'm sure my mom would have loved you." –I stroke her cheek.

\- "It'd have been my honor to meet the person responsible for the best thing that ever happened to me."

\- "I adore you." –I moved my hands to her hips- "I'm so in love with you."

I pulled her with me as I rolled on the bed so that she'd be on top of me.

\- "If someone had told me a year ago that a guy... that you out of everyone would have me this wrapped around their finger, I'd have laughed in their face." –she kissed my forehead- "But I'm so glad this is how my life is now." –she kissed my nose- "Because I've never felt so at home." –she kissed my lips- "I've never felt so alive and safe." –she placed her hands on my chest as she sat back up, straddling my hips- "I'm so in love with you, Bellamy, I feel like I'm going to explode in bubbles of happiness."

She laughed at her own choice of words and I laughed with her. I knew I was one of the few privileged people to see this side of her: the carefree, relaxed and playful Sam that I loved so much; not that I didn't love her fighter and survivor side, but I loved seeing her like this because I knew she'd only show this side of her if she felt completely safe, and I took pride in being that for her: a safe place, a home... because she was that for me too. I rose to a sitting position and I stood like that, just looking at her completely mesmerized.

\- "Care to share what's going on inside that pretty head of yours now?" –she smiled, wrapping her arms around my neck.

\- "I wanna do something."

\- "You know I'm always open to new things." –she raised an eyebrow playfully at me- "So, what is it?"

\- "We can try something sex-related later." –I smiled at her and she raised a questioning eyebrow- "Do you trust me?"

\- "With my life."

I made her move from my lap so that I could rise from the bed as she eyed my every move, crossing her legs and lying back slightly to rest her upper body on her hands; I opened the drawer in which she kept her knives and took one.

\- "You know I'd include knife play in the sexual category, right?"

\- "I wasn't thinking of that." –I sat cross-legged on the bed in front of her- "But we can try that too." –I smirked at her and she rolled her eyes playfully at me as her cheeks turned pink.

\- "So, what's with all this mystery?"

\- "You know I love you." –she smiled- "And I want what we have to last forever."

\- "Same page."

\- "So... I was thinking..." –I started playing with the knife.

\- "Yeah...?"

\- "There isn't really a place down where I can buy you or get a ring for you so I thought matching scars would do the trick."

\- "And here I was thinking after last night you couldn't surprise me more."

She smiled as she moved to sit on my lap again, placing her hands on my jaw and moving my head up so that she could kiss me, deep and slow.

\- "I'm not asking you to marry me, I don't need a paper signed by the Chancellor to tell me how I feel or what we are and I know you don't either... it's not like getting married would guarantee us happiness or keep us together; both our parents are examples of that." –she nodded in agreement- "What I want this to mean is a promise to ourselves, of my love for you and my commitment to us, to you; because I love you and I wish I could give you the life you deserve but I can't..."

\- "Babe..." –she stopped me as I started rambling and I appreciated it- "I don't care about how or where we live; as long as you're with me, that's the life I want." –she placed her hand on my chin to keep my eyes on hers- "All I want is you." –she gave me a quick peck on the lips and then moved her right hand over mine as she smiled- "Make it cute or I'll make yours horrendous."

I took her hand in mine and moved my face closer to hers, biting her lip to pull her down slightly before kissing her once more.  _I'll never get tired of this, she's the best part of me_.

\- "I love you, my little stubborn fighter."

\- "And I love you, my savior."

\- "Why savior?"

\- "Well, apart from the obvious fact that you've saved my physical ass in numerous occasions, you've also helped me save me from myself."

\- "You saved yourself, love."

\- "With a little help from a stowaway." –she entangled her fingers in my hair- "From passenger 101."

\- "Still to this day, the best decision I ever made."

\- "Couldn't agree more."

**_END OF FLASHBACK_   
**

**\--------------------------**

I rose my right hand and caressed over my own scar, smiling at the memory.  _Why couldn't things just have stayed like that? We were so happy and everything was going so smooth._

\- "I still feel and mean everything I said that day, Sam; you're the one for me, you know it."

\- "Me too, but things are different now." –she sighed, dropping her hand to the side- "Listen, Bell... as much as I appreciate you saving my life again, I'd much rather you'd see why that was the right thing to do; not for me, not for O, but because it's what had to be done; because Pike was, is and will always be wrong. We're all Grounders now, you said it yourself once..." –she smiled a bit- "...different types, sure, but Grounders after all. Until you realize that and find yourself again..." –she took a deep breath and looked into my eyes- "... you're still not on my side."

\- "I'm sorry."

\- "I really thought you were going to hand everyone over." –she started walking back towards the cave and I followed her- "If they hadn't put that rifle to my head and the possibility of leaving O alone hadn't crossed my mind, I'd have hurt you."

\- "Could you ever forgive me?"

\- "For what?"

\- "For not being good enough for you. You should move on with your life; Sheda..."

\- "Bellamy, no, you don't get to decide that." –she turned her face to look at me- "You don't get to say what's best for me let alone who I should be with. I know when I've been the happiest and I know who's responsible for that..." –she removed her eyes from mine and focused on the walk ahead of us- "Sure, you've fucked up big time but I can't turn off my feelings like I turn off the light, I wouldn't do it even if I could because I still think you're... I still love you, Bellamy, I just think you're lost and it's because of my feelings for you that I'm willing to give you another chance; anyone else would be dead by now, I hope you know that." –she glanced at me for a second and I nodded- "I can't keep excusing your actions just because I love you; I need you to find yourself again and, as much as I'd like to help you..." –she rose her hand to touch my cheek- "...only you can do that now, my love."


	17. This is not a game.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our survivors make it back to the cave where they receive a disturbing message from Jasper.

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

We had made it back to the cave to let the rest know what exactly had happened. Once we got there, as we were discussing what to do now, Jasper reached us through the radio, talking about a chip that was making everyone go insane back in Arkadia. I was sat with Sam who had been the last to make it back to the cave with Bellamy.

\- "What happened back there?" –I finally asked once I managed to calm down slightly as I had felt furious when I saw them come in together- "You made up with him? You forgave him?"

\- "No." –she opened her eyes since she had been lying against the rock with them closed- "I asked him why he did what he did, hoping he'd said it was the right thing to do but, mmm, well... he did it to save us. Which I appreciate, you know? I didn't really want to die and leave you alone but I'd rather him understanding why that had to be done. I just hope he'll see it at some point."

I carefully studied Sam's face; she was good at hiding her emotions but I knew she was tired and she wasn't even bothering to put on a façade anymore: she looked tired and sad, almost heartbroken, and that only made me feel worse.

\- "I'm sorry."

\- "For? You haven't done anything wrong, O."

\- "I'm sorry for lashing out on you. Bellamy might still be alive but he's not who he used to be."

\- "Don't worry about it."

\- "Sam..."

\- "I'll be fine. This can only go one of two ways, either we make up or we don't; we both know it. Personally, I'd like to make up because...well..." –she didn't have to finish, I knew well what she meant even as she drifted off.

\- "You love him."

\- "Yeah, but right now I don't see much of who he was when we landed or when we lived in Arkadia before and after Mount Weather..."

\- "What are you going to do?"

\- "About...?"

\- "Bellamy, Sheda... after we end this..."

\- "I think I'm gonna need time to be alone."

\- "Oh."

\- "No, I mean, alone as in single." –she gave me a soft smile- "I also don't think I could go back to Arkadia and see your brother every day, see him probably moving on with someone who does think like him, someone more similar and better for him..."

\- "Sam, Bellamy didn't turn this way because of you."

\- "I'm not so sure, O. He was fine until we got together."

\- "And you were good for three months." -I reminded her, trying to make her see the truth.

\- "I know but, with everything that's happened lately, I... I've been having doubts to put it some way."

\- "About your feelings for him?"

\- "About him only having feelings for me."

\- "What? Why? What happened?"

\- "Maybe this is just me trying to find a reason to move on from him..."

\- "You think you were a rebound?"

\- "I don't know, O." -she sighed and I knew I had to be careful with what I said, feelings had always been a touchy topic for Sam- "These days I don't know anything."

\- "Does this have to do anything with Clarke?"

\- "Yeah. Listen, I don't blame them, I wouldn't choose me either. I'm just mad I'm seeing this now, maybe if I had before, things would have been different; maybe Bellamy would be okay."

\- "Is this because of what happened with Roan?" –she looked at me confused- "Monty told me Bellamy was willing to let you go after them to save Clarke, even if Roan could kill you."

\- "I mean, Clarke's always been there with him, they're co-leaders." –Sam shrugged her shoulders- "I know she doesn't feel anything for Bellamy, she was with Finn and then with Lexa and Bell keeps saying I'm the one for him but, I don't know... I mean, he only went rogue when she wasn't there; it's like she kept him sure of what he was doing. He might be in love with me but I think he's always trust Clarke's judgement better than mine which is why I'm sure he'd manage to live without me and move on and why my 'death' didn't affect him as much as everything that happened with Clarke."

\- "And he started dating you when she left..." –I added pensive and I understood Sam's skeptical undertone when we met Clarke after the massacre and before we went inside to convince Bellamy- "I've always known he had and has a thing for you, like he's so in love with you Sam... the day you got together I thought I'd need to move out grossed out by your nauseating love and PDA."-I smiled to myself.

\- "Hey!" –Sam punched me lightly and smiled too- "To be fair I never expected your brother to be into PDA so..."

I looked at her as she smiled.  _This is the Sam I wanted to see._

\- "Don't do that to yourself. You're always taking care of Bell and telling him people's actions are not on him; his actions and what he did... none are on you; you tried to help him, you still try because that's what you do, and I love you for that, but you have to get out of that situation before he actually hurts you too. Directly this time."

\- "I..." –she looked away as she finally broke- "I love him, O. I know he's lost and fucked up but I can't stop my feelings. He's been my first everything..."

\- "We'll get through this, ogeda." [Together]

I moved closer to her and wiped away the tears forming in her eyes carefully; I hugged her and she hugged me back, sobbing lightly against me.

\- "I must confess..." –Sam spoke quietly after she calmed down- "I love your brother, but you're my sister, and you need me more than he does now." -she looked at me- "Look at us, you're comforting me over what? Your brother being alive?" –Sam scoffed- "You've just lost the love of your life to a bullet, O, I should be the one comforting you."

\- "I'm fine." –I was quick to brush it off.

\- "You are not, don't act tough around me, strisis. I can't say I know how you're feeling but I have an idea. You need more time and space than I do."

\- "Meaning?"

\- "We should leave."

\- "We?"

\- "You're my family, O, and no one can change that. You really are stuck with me, you've been since we landed but I'm reminding you in case you forgot."

I smiled at her words, she made me feel better, at least for a moment; I was still broken but knowing Sam was there with me made things just that less hard. We remained in peaceful silence for a moment, until Monty started to talk about the chip Jaha was giving to everyone at camp. I had to go back, I couldn't stay put in there any longer; I rose from my place next to Sam as she eyed me and started to pack my things.

\- "O, wait." –Bellamy walked towards me as soon as he landed eyes on me and realized what I was doing- "You can't just leave."

\- "Watch me."

\- "You heard what Jasper said on the radio, Arkadia is not safe."

\- "What Jasper said sounds insane." –I glanced at him for a second- "Pike's gone. I can handle myself."

I heard Sam rise from behind me as she let out a small chuckle and I knew she was coming with me.

\- "Grounders burn their dead."

\- "I know that." –Bellamy was quick to answer me- "And then what? Where are you gonna go?"

\- "You don't get to ask me that."

\- "What more do I have to do to prove that I'm on your side?"

\- "Bring Lincoln back." –I walked past him as the anger filled my voice- "Turning Pike in doesn't make you one of the good guys, Bellamy. You did that to save me, to save Sam; not because you thought what Pike was doing to the Grounders was wrong." –I spat, I knew Sam had had this conversation with him but I wanted to make sure he knew.

\- "The Grounders were starving us out."

Sam had her things with her now too and was standing next to me; she scoffed at Bellamy's words and rolled her eyes. I knew I had to end the conversation before they could get into a fight and Sam did something she'd later regret. Sheda had been quick to move after her but she asked him to let us deal with this on our own promising to let him know when we were done and he understood, going back to sit next to Harper with whom he had started a conversation.

\- "Because you massacred an army that was sent to protect us." –I reproached Bellamy.

\- "That army could have attacked us at any time and you know it."

\- "But they didn't attack, you did that. You were hurting and you lashed out because that's what you do. There are consequences, Bell; people get hurt, people die... your people. Monroe's dead, Ion's dead, Lincoln's dead."

I ended and I left the cave with Sam before the tears fell from my eyes.

\- "Where do you wanna do it?" –Sam asked me as we got out.

\- "I don't know, let's find his body first and then..."

\- "They're here." –Miller spoke, cutting me as we heard the engine of the Rover.

Sam and I turned around to see what was happening; Bellamy had followed us and was looking now at the Rover too when a door opened and closed revealing Clarke, who stopped dead in the tracks as she landed her eyes on Bellamy.  _Huh._

\- "Need your help!" –Jasper screamed, he was carrying Raven and Sam immediately run up to him so I followed- "We have to get her inside before she wakes up!"

\- "Where you followed?" –Bellamy quickly asked and moved to them to get Raven.

\- "I don't know? Maybe?"

As Miller started giving orders to everyone, Sam looked at me.

\- "Your call, O."

\- "Octavia!" –Clarke called me before I could answer Sam- "We need you!" –I glanced at Sam and she rolled her eyes.

\- "I could always go first with Sheda to check what's going on there..."

\- "Sam!" –Clarke called- "You too."

\- "I guess we are staying." –I sighed and Sam nodded.

\- "Clear some space!" –Clarke was quick to demand as she went inside.

\- "It's a cave, there's nothing but space in there."

Sam whispered and I smiled; I was glad she was somewhat back to her usual self after what had been going on lately.

\- "What the hell happened to her?" –Sinclair was quick to move towards Raven.

\- "I've told you, Raven is not Raven anymore." –Jasper was answering as Sam and I made it next to him, Bellamy's eyes landing on us or more so on me as Sam was avoiding him again- "Jaha's been chipping everyone."

\- "Jasper's right, I've seen it with my own eyes."

\- "I don't need your help, alright?" –Jasper was quick to cut Clarke.

\- "Hey, J." –Sam moved beside him and he relaxed as he heard her, turning to face her- "Can you explain to me what exactly is happening?" –Sam's voice was soft and calm.

\- "Jaha's using the chips to control everyone, you swallow it and it changes you. You forget who you are and then you see this thing, A.L.I.E; only she's not really there."

\- "So, like a ghost or a vision?" –Sam asked him and Jasper nodded.

\- "She made Raven slit her own wrists."

\- "What!" –Sam spat turning to look at Raven and this time it was Jasper trying to calm her down as he grabbed her arm carefully so that she'd face him- "She was trying to get her out of her head." –Jasper eyed Sam carefully- "That's not how Jaha put it, right?"

\- "No, now it sounds even less appealing that the first time."

\- "I was trying to help her but..." –Jasper mumbled as he looked at Raven.

\- "Let's help her now." –Sinclair rose from next to Raven and walked up to them- "Did she say how?"

\- "She was working on building something, she needed one of the old wristbands but Jaha destroyed all of them."

\- "Wait a second." –Clarke spoke, taking a small box out of her coat and a small chip from it- "Does it look like this?"

\- "Not exactly." –Jasper answered as Sam shook her head.

Out of nowhere, Raven was up on her feet and running out of the cave as we all followed her. She started to speak as she looked around, as if she were talking to someone else, but it wasn't any of us.

\- "If Raven finds out where we are, so will A.L.I.E; she'll come for her." –Jasper explained as Bellamy, Sam and I tried to control Raven without hurting her- "Reaper stick." –Jasper injected Raven's neck- "Last dose."

\- "We have to go." –Clarke spoke from next to us.

\- "Why? A.L.I.E doesn't know where we are." –Bellamy was quick to speak.

\- "Because I know where we can get a wristband."

Once we all agreed and got to the Rover, we drove to the place where Clarke said we could find a wristband, followed by Sam and Sheda on Selene. As we got there, a woman came out of the house.

\- "Niylah has a wristband?" –Sam questioned next to Bellamy's window- "Now this is unexpected."

\- "How do you know her?" –Clarke looked at her through the window.

\- "We came here looking for you and she was the one to point us in the right direction." –Sam shrugged her shoulders- "I still have a few questions for Roan now that I think about it."

\- "I'll talk to her." –Clarke got out of the Rover.

\- "I'll go with you." –Bellamy was quick to offer.

Sam and Sheda got down from Selene and I got out of the Rover through the back door and soon I realized Niylah had a sword on her hand.

\- "I thought you said she was friendly." –I looked at Clarke.

\- "Well, last time we were here with this Rover..." –Sam looked at me before facing Niylah again- "...Pike wasn't very nice to her." –I nodded in understanding.

\- "Stay here, we'll handle it."

\- "Try that again." –Sam spoke- "Last time I let you both handle things, I lost or almost someone I cared about, so not a chance, princess."

\- "This is not a game, Sam." –Clarke pulled her back.

\- "Did my words give you the impression it was?" –Sam scoffed getting rid of her- "I know their language, do you?" –Clarke remained silent- "Yeah, that's what I thought. Besides, she knows me."

\- "I'm going with you."

And with that, Sam started walking towards Niylah followed by Sheda as Clarke stayed back.

\- "She's going to kill us all." –Clarke whispered under her breath.

\- "It's my fault." –Bellamy sighed.

\- "Sam knows what she's doing, don't give yourself too much credit." –Jasper stuck his head out of the Rover- "So far, her hands are cleaner than yours. Let her be."

****━━━━━━** **

**SAM'S POV**

_Of course, Niylah would have a wristband, I mean, a trading post is where you'd expect things like this to end._  I knew she didn't like Skaikru much but I was hoping she'd remember me from last time, she had been nice to me.

\- "Niylah." –Sheda spoke first- "Ai laik Sheda kom Trikru." [I am Sheda from Trikru]

\- "En ai Sam, dula op yu mema ai in? [And I am Sam, do you remember me?]

\- "Sha." –she nodded- "Ste hef kom las gou der?"- she pointed at the Rover. [Is the man from last time there?]

\- "Nou, em na wan op gon em kripon gon Polis." -[No, he's going to pay for his crimes in Polis]- "Yu na sis yumi au?" [Can you help us?]

\- "Ai na sis yu au, Jusheda." [I will help you, Jusheda] –she looked beside us- "Ba skaikru ste nou monin hir." [But Skaikru is not welcome here.]

\- "Yeah, tell that to Clarke."

I turned around and moved my hand for Clarke to come next to us, Bellamy following her.

\- "Ha dula op yu get in hashta 'Jusheda'?" –Sheda asked as they made their way next to us [How do you know about 'Jusheda'?] - "Ai jos get in kos em chich ai op." [I only know because she told me about it]

\- "Diyo kom dison soujon snap." [Things like this travel fast.]

She looked at me and nodded when someone cleared their throat behind us.

\- "Oso beda chich Inglis op." -[We should speak English] I smiled at Niylah before turning to Clarke and Bellamy- "Check this out, we're all still alive. You're welcome." –I gave them a side smile before Niylah spoke.

\- "Skaikru is not welcome here, Wanheda."

\- "Niylah, what's wrong?"

\- "She's waking up, hurry!" –Sinclair yelled from the Rover.

\- "Is your father here?" –Clarke's voice was higher this time as she began to panic.

\- "My father is dead, he was part of an army killed by your people while trying to protect you."

\- "Niylah, please."

\- "I said no. Leave now."

\- "We don't have time for this." –Bellamy rose his rifle and pointed it at Niylah- "Move!"

 _I'm so fucking done with this new Bellamy._  I was quick to take my blade out and place it to his neck and he moved slightly back, surprised.

\- "You've done enough, Blake." –he moved his face to look at me- "Your actions have consequences, this..." –I pointed at Niylah with my head- "... is just one of them. Now put the rifle down before I do something we'll both regret." –I looked at Niylah- "You don't owe me anything but I need your help to save my innocent friend, I'd be in debt with you. A favor from Jusheda has to count for something, whatever you need."

\- "Sam..." –Clarke started.

\- "I'd even take a life if you ask me." –I removed my blade from Bellamy's neck- "You have my word, Niylah."

She looked at Clarke before facing me again and nodding, moving to the side so that we could move inside.

\- "Get her inside."

\- "Sheda, take Raven inside; fast."

He nodded at me and quickly took Raven from Sinclair's arms and ran inside the house so that Raven couldn't know where we were. I followed him with everyone else behind me.

\- "My mom was here." –Monty spoke and I couldn't help but roll my eyes at the memory of that woman- "If she was chipped, A.L.I.E would know."

\- "That's why we're putting her in the back." –Clarke quickly explained, knowing the house- "Through there."

Sheda followed her indications as we soon found ourselves inside of a room with a bed, in which Sheda let go of Raven as she grunted, letting us all know she was awake.

\- "Quick." –Clarke threw me a rope- "Tie her to the bed."

I started tying up her left arm to the bed's headboard while Sheda tied her left leg, Octavia her right one and Jasper her right hand. She started fighting us all back, landing a fist to Jasper's stomach, making him fall to the ground. It took us several minutes, but we finally managed to get her immobilized on the bed. She was out of herself, I didn't recognize her and I had to get out of there; and so I did after I made sure she couldn't escape. I got out of the room only to find Bellamy pointing his rifle at Niylah yet again.

\- "We're already in her house, why the fuck are you still pointing that thing at her."

\- "I don't trust her."

\- "I know, you only trust Pike, blablabla." –I walked next to Niylah- "Leave her alone or deal with me."

\- "Guys." –Clarke appeared from behind me- "Niylah, could you give us a second?"

Niylah looked at me and I nodded as she moved to the other side of the room.

\- "Well, now that you're back together, I'll leave you both to discuss how to solve this new mess, Mr. and Mrs. Leader."

\- "Why did you do that?" –Clarke faced me- "I had it under control."

\- "Oh, so you want to talk to me? Cool."

\- "Don't avoid the question."

\- "Do what? Protect an innocent?"

\- "The favor. I had it."

\- "Your definition of 'having things under control' is quite funny, Clarke. Bellamy has already aided Pike in killing her father, do you think he wouldn't have shot if she had resisted?" –I scoffed as Bellamy tensed next to her- "Do you not remember what's been going on in Arkadia?"

\- "I don't think he'd have shot her."

\- "Well, I'm terribly glad we don't have to find out."

\- "It's Bellamy we are talking about here, Sam." –she pointed at him- "Your boyfriend."

\- "You and I are talking about different versions of Bellamy. My boyfriend got lost in the last update; the new version of Bellamy, let me remind you, is still on Pike's side." –I thought the parallel with a computer was appropriate since people were getting chipped by one now, apparently.

\- "And what if she calls in that favor and asks you to kill someone?" –Bellamy asked, trying to move the focus of the conversation away from him.

\- "Then let's hope it's not someone you know and you have to go through that process." –I eyed him up and down- "Because I gave her my word, and I do keep my promises." –I took a deep breath- "You know what? I need fresh air, try not to kill anyone else while I'm out."

\- "Sam..." –Bellamy tried to grab my arm to stop me.

\- "Clarke's here now." –I pointed at her with my head- "I'm sure she'll appreciate your company. Have fun."


	18. Loyalty.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the team works out a way to help Raven without hurting her, Bellamy tries to talk to Sam, trying to figure out what he did wrong; but the conversation won’t go quite as he hoped it would.

**BELLAMY'S POV**

I had no idea what had gotten into her; I knew Sam was mad at me but so far, she'd made an impressive job remaining calm around me because I knew she could have lashed out on me if she really wanted to.  _What do I have to do, Sam?_  I turned around to see Clarke talking with Niylah again when Octavia came out of the room in which they had left Raven.

-    "Where's Sam?" –she was quick to ask once she realized she wasn't in the house.

-    "She went outside to get some air." –I answered and she walked past me- "She wants to be alone."

-    "No, Bellamy." –she faced me- "She wants to be away from you."

-    "What?"

-    "You've hurt me, but you've broken her. And I thought that was impossible."

-    "What is that supposed to mean?"

-    "You know how Sam feels about you and how much she cares, how she blames herself for everything, especially for what you've been doing since Pike got here. You've known her for a long time now better than anyone else, maybe even better than me..., and still you can't see..."

-    "O..."

-    "I shouldn't do this, but I need to know." –she moved closer to me and glued her eyes to mine- "Are you in love with Sam?" –I nodded- "But do you love someone else?"

-    "What?"

-    "Do you love Clarke?"

-    "O, where is this coming from?"

-    "You were willing to let Sam go after Roan, you let Pike and his people hurt Sam, you've hurt her..."

-    "I know and I'm trying to fix it. But what does any of this have to do with Clarke?"

-    "You'd never let anything hurt her. You went out of your way to try to get her back. You didn't do that for Sam."

-    "The Grounders see Clarke as our leader, we need her."

-    "And Sam was your girl." –she reproached me, raising her voice; that past tense really got to me- "I don't get why Clarke would be more important to you than Sam." –she walked away.

-    "This is ridiculous." –I walked after her- "I love Sam."

-    "Or you love how important she made you feel?" –she turned to face me, her face burning with rage- "Sam's given you everything no one else would; I'm starting to think you've used my sister until Clarke came back and then, you dismissed her."

-    "You know that's not true."

-    "And why then did you only focus on Sam when Clarke wasn't around? You got together when Clarke left and destroyed what you had as soon as you heard Clarke was in danger. You told Monty you didn't want to choose between them..."

-    "O..."

-    "Think about it from my point of view or Sam's, let me know how that looks." –she glanced at me one last time- "If you don't love Sam, let her go; she deserves much better than being anyone's second choice, especially from the person she loves most."

And with that, Octavia left the house, leaving me to my thoughts.  _Have I been giving that impression to Sam? Is she doubting my feelings for her? Is that what this is all about? Or is this adding to everything else? I have to talk to her._

**\--------------**

**SAM'S POV**

I had been outside for less than ten minutes when I heard the house's door open and a couple footsteps that I had grown to recognize over the past months.

-    "I'm fine, it was just a bit crowded in there for me, O."

-    "Yeah, Bellamy is a lot to take in these days."

-    "O..." –I faced her, only to be met with a guilty expression on her face- "What happened now?"

-    "I talked to him."

-    "Did you get in a fight?"

-    "No, no. I spoke about you."

-    "O..."

-    "It's what sisters do." –she flashed me a smile and I had to smile too- "And I had to know."

-    "What exactly did you need to know?"

-    "If what we've been talking about was true."

-    "And?"

-    "Octavia, Sam..." –Sheda's voice interrupted us- "You should come inside. It's cold out here and they are trying to figure out how to bring your friend Raven back."

-    "Alright."

Octavia nodded and moved inside as I followed her, being stopped at the door by Sheda's arm.

-    "You okay?"

-    "Yeah, terrific."

-    "Sam..."

-    "Please, not you too. I promise I'm fine, I just need to get this over with so that we can bury Lincoln and move on."

-    "I'm with you."

-    "I know." –I hugged him- "And I'm forever grateful."

We got inside and I moved straight towards the fireplace to warm my hands a little as I listened to Monty and Sinclair talk about how to bring Raven back before entering the other room.

-    "A targeted electromagnetic pulse could destroy the chip's circuitry. We could use this to send an EMP along Raven's nervous system; just need to reverse the polarity, wire for external input and attach a battery."

-    "Will that hurt her?" –I asked entering the room followed by Octavia and Sheda as Sinclair looked at me.

-    "EMP's don't affect our bodies but I don't know the mechanics of how this chip integrates with her brain."

-    "This was Raven's plan." –Bellamy spoke- "She wouldn't do it if it was gonna destroy her brain."

-    "Depends how bad she wanted it out." –Octavia eyed him.

-    "If you had a trial subject... would you be able to check how that works? Decide whether we'd be hurting Raven or saving her?"

-    "You are not taking that chip." –Octavia faced me, knowing me but unaware I did have one of those things with me- "I don't care how much you want to save Raven or how much you think this is a brilliant idea, it isn't."

-    "But..."

-    "Besides, we don't have any other chip to do so." –Sinclair spoke, also unaware I was carrying one- "And still, without an electromagnet, all this is just talk."

-    "Where can we get that?" –I was quick to ask.

-    "The Ark." –Sinclair answered solemnly- "Every station had a pulsed inductive thruster for maneuvering."

-    "I got this." –I turned around to leave.

-    "No." –Bellamy stopped me- "Arkadia is out of the question. It's too dangerous, Sam."

-    "We use the dropship." –Monty spoke before I could answer Bellamy- "It had PI thrusters just like the Ark."

-    "Yeah." -Sinclair nodded- "That's good."

-    "Alright, then let's go."

-    "I'll go with you." –Sinclair moved next to me but Monty stopped him.

-    "No, you should stay with Raven and figure out how this thing works." –he then looked at me- "We can take the Rover."

-    "I drive."

-    "Fine." -Monty agreed with me- "We'll be back by the time you finish the device."

-    "Hey." –Octavia squeezed my shoulders- "You stay, I'll go."

-    "O..."

-    "Raven's gonna need someone strong-minded to hold her back, that's you." –she smiled at me- "And Jasper needs you too, he trusts you the most out of everyone left in here."

-    "I'll go with her." –Sheda offered- "I'll keep an eye on her."

-    "Fine, I'll stay this time." –I rolled my eyes- "But I'll accompany you to the door. Can I at least do that or are you both banning me too from fresh air, huh?"

Sheda shook her head and pushed me to walk in front of him passing by Clarke and Bellamy, feeling both their eyes on us but choosing to ignore them for the time being.

-    "Oh, and I'm driving now." –Monty walked past me looking at Sheda.

-    "I don't know how that thing works."

-    "Just sit in the back and stay alive."

-    "I'm ready." –Octavia moved next to me and hugged me- "We'll be back in no time."

-    "Be careful and come back in one piece. You see anyone out there that's a threat to you, you kill them; I don't care who it is. Stay alive, okay? I'm tired of mourning."

Octavia nodded and left followed by Sheda after he hugged me. I watched the Rover disappear in the darkness when I felt someone beside me.

-    "Jusheda."

-    "Niylah." –I faced her with a smile- "You can call me Sam, remember?"

-    "What's happening exactly?"

-    "I'm not a hundred percent sure myself but apparently there's this robotic-ghost-like woman A.L.I.E who's managed to chip a bunch of people. Raven is one of them, she tried to get away from her but A.L.I.E. made her slit her wrists and got her back; apparently, you can't feel pain once you take the chip."

-    "But that's a good thing, right?"

-    "I guess it could be." –I shrugged my shoulders- "But if Raven tried to get her out of her head, there must be something wrong and that's what we need to find out."

-    "Help!" –I heard Jasper's voice- "Guys, help me!"

-    "Fuck! Stay back Niylah."

I entered the house again, leaving Niylah in the first room and entering the room where Raven was finding everyone in there: Bellamy was pulling Raven back onto the bed as Jasper held her left arm still and Clarke her right one.

-    "What the fuck is going on?!"

-    "She's reopening her wounds and trying to get away!" –Clarke looked at me- "I need bandages, help me."

I did as she told me, finding bandages and giving them to Clarke before moving to Jasper's side and pushing Raven down to stay still.

-    "A.L.I.E.!" –Jasper yelled looking at Raven, who moved her face to look at him- "Look at me, I know you can hear this. Why are you doing this to her? Let her go!"

-    "I'll let her go when you give me what I want." –Raven spoke but she was unrecognizable, hadn't I seen her mouth move I wouldn't have known who it was.

-    "What do you want?" –I asked and she faced me.

-    "The technology that Clarke carries belongs to me."

-    "What is she talking about?" –I looked at Clarke whose face went pale.

-    "Clarke, just give it to her."

-    "No way." –Clarke looked at Jasper and then at me- "I can't."

-    "Alright." –I moved back and looked at Raven- "How do we know you won't kill Raven if you get it?"

-    "You have my word."

-    "No offense, A.L.I.E., but words don't mean much to me right now."

-    "If you let Raven die..." –Clarke spoke- "You'll never get it."

Suddenly, Raven stopped fighting and sank down on the bed; the four of us looked at each other, still unsure of what really was going on.

-    "Okay." –Clarke whispered before addressing us- "Untie her wrists and held her steady, I need to put her shoulder back in place."

Jasper and I held Raven steady on one side as Bellamy and Clarke did so on her other while Clarke pushed Raven's shoulder back into place.

-    "How the fuck is she not even spilling a tear."

-    "There's no pain in the City of Light, Sam." –Raven looked at me.

-    "Yeah? And where exactly where you when Pike showed up?" –I couldn't stop the words from falling from my mouth- "It's too late, A.L.I.E.."

-    "Sam..." –Jasper squeezed my shoulder.

-    "I know. I'll shut up. No one cares."

Knowing now that A.L.I.E. wouldn't harm Raven again, I left the room only to almost bump into Niylah who was pacing the other one.

-    "What happened?" –she asked as soon as she saw me.

-    "She tried to escape by dislocating her shoulder. Clarke put it back and they are taking care of her wounds now."

-    "You don't give the orders, Clarke!" –Jasper yelled and I knew I had to get in there again.

I made a sign to Niylah to give me a second and I went back inside.

**\------------------**

**JASPER'S POV**

-    "Guess he doesn't forget you for killing her girlfriend."

-    "Jasper, come with me." –Sam was back in the room and motioned me to exit the room- "And you, A.L.I.E... you and I are going to have a good talk if you hurt Jasper."

-    "You know where to find me."

I heard Raven answer Sam as I exited the room and sat down, Sam following me.

-    "You okay, J?"

-    "I was so glad when I heard you got away from Pike." –I rose my face to look at her- "I'm sorry about Lincoln."

-    "Me too, J, me too." –she sighed- "That bullet was meant for me... I can't bring him back, but we will get Raven back, alright?" –I nodded as she squeezed my shoulder- "I promise."

-    "Making promises as a synonym of believing something will happen is not how that works, Sam." –Bellamy's voice came from behind us as soon he was in front of us.

-    "I know how promises work, that's why I don't break them." –Sam glanced up at him- "I'll be right back, J; I'll bring us both something to drink."

-    "Thanks, Sam."

I wasn't completely aware of what had been going on between them, but I had noticed the coldness with which Sam was treating Bellamy.  _She's finally had it, now she just has to stay away from him. And Clarke. She's better than this... than them._  Bellamy looked at her go, he looked broken but I didn't care.

-    "So, you're okay with Clarke coming back after everything? Taking over?"

-    "She's trying to save Raven."

-    "Guess she thinks Raven's worth saving then. Lucky for her or she'd end up suffocating to death or being shot in the back."

-    "Just get yourself together Jasper; you can't let anger get in the way of what we have to do."

-    "That's funny coming from you... when you're angry, people die; ask that girl next to Sam."

-    "Jasper..."

-    "So, I can't let anger take control like you let your own take over back in Arkadia, almost getting Sam killed twice? Cool, got it."

-    "It's not the same. I didn't want anything to happen to Sam."

-    "Good thing my life is not on your hands then." –Sam appeared from behind him with a glass of water- "Here, J. The last thing I need is you getting dehydrated."

-    "Thanks." –I took it, smiling at her- "I'm so lucky to still have you."

-    "And you always will, I'm not going anywhere."

I rose from my seat and hugged her, to which she immediately reciprocated. I needed that, the comfort of having someone I cared about and who cared about me; I just wished it was Maya.

-    "I need some air." –I whispered into her ear.

-    "Alright." –she let go of me and nodded in understanding, taking the glass from my hand- "If you need me..."

-    "I know."

**\---------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

I had to talk with Sam; it was killing me seeing her so close and not being able to even hold a conversation like we used to, let alone be anywhere near her or touch her, not to even mention kissing her. We watched Jasper go and, as soon as he closed the door after him, Sam flopped on the couch and I immediately kneeled down next to her.

-    "Sam, are you okay?"

-    "I'm fine." –she brushed me off, not even looking at me.

-    "Talk to me."

-    "The only person I'd like to talk to right now is the idiot you were when we first met."

 _What have I done?_  Octavia had been right; we both knew Sam was strong both mentally and physically but she was starting to give in and that scared me because I knew it was my fault, just like everything else.

-    "I'm still here." –I slowly moved my hand to cup her face so that she'd look at me but she slapped my hand to get me away from her.

-    "No. Please, stop." –she sniffled- "I'm trying to give you space to heal and deal with your demons while I try to get rid of mine without hurting you."

-    "Sam." –I sat beside her and this time she stood still- "What's going on? I want to help you but I can't if you don't talk to me." –I begged- "Please."

-    "I've told you." –she took a deep breath- "I can't stand knowing your thoughts align more with Pike's than with mine, I can't stand knowing you don't trust me, I can't stand not knowing what I did wrong, and I most definitively can't stand not being good enough."

-    "I do trust you; you did nothing wrong, Sam." –I reassured her- "And if someone is not good enough... that's me, love."

 _Love._  It was a slip of the tongue; I was so used to using it... She had been avoiding referring to me by anything that wasn't my name and that hurt, the sudden feeling of defamiliarization was not something I wanted to experience with Sam after everything we had gone through. I knew she had noticed it too, for she tensed slightly as the word hit her ears and remained silent, as if weighing her options.

-    "And how come we're still on opposite sides of a war that was never there, huh?" –she spoke after a moment of silence, finally facing me.

-    "We are not."

-    "I'm not following, last time I checked you were on Pike's side."

-    "That's because I don't trust the Grounders."

-    "Tell me something I don't know." –she scoffed- "And why do you trust Pike? Why, out of all the people you could have chosen, you decided Pike was the best person out there to endorse? Why...?" –she searched my face with her eyes- "What happened for you to become this way?"

-    "I... I wasn't okay..." –I lowered my face, focusing my gaze on my hands- "It was a cumulous of things..."

-    "Bell, please, talk to me." –her hand moved to mine and I immediately felt the warmth I had been missing slowly coming back through the part of my hand she was touching- "I need you back."

-    "I miss you." –I confessed- "I know we've been together but I..."

-    "Talk to me."

-    "You were right, we shouldn't have massacred that army; they were there to protect us from the real threat: Azgeda."

-    "Do you really think and feel like this or are you just telling me what I want to hear." –she was looking so intensively at me, I almost had trouble breathing.

-    "I mean it, Sam. I'm sorry about Ion."

-    "Was it you?"

-    "No, I didn't even know he was there until you told me he died in your arms." –she rose her hand to her hair, taking a strand of braided hair that wasn't hers and I realized it had been Ion's- "I'm sorry I didn't fight for you, I'm sorry I hurt you, I'm sorry I didn't protect you..."

-    "Bellamy, I don't blame you for anything that happened to me while Pike was on charge; I'd have done it all the same even if you had been by my side."

-    "But you're my family..." –I held her hand in mine and this time she didn't push me away- "I left you at Mount Weather and when Raven called... every time something bad happens to you it's because of a decision I've made. I love you, it daunts me to think I could lose you because I did something wrong; I've actually lost you because I pushed you away, thinking you'd be better if I stayed away from you... I thought you'd be safe."

-    "Can you listen to me right now and trust me for a second? Each time I've been about to die it's been because of a decision I made, how many times do I have to tell you? I told Sheda the other day and he understood perfectly; I know you were listening, so why can't you understand that?"

-    "Because I know it's not true. He wasn't there, I was."

-    "Bellamy, I need you to stop carrying the weight of my decisions on you." -she took a deep breath and looked into my eyes- "I can't believe the demon that's been haunting you all this time, it's me; I'm breaking you." -the tears filled her eyes- "I'm not good for you... I..."

\- "Sam..."

"If you can take anything from this, please, let it be this: I chose to go out of the camp to look for O when Lincoln poisoned me, I chose to confront Murphy, I chose to get out of the dropship to keep fighting, I chose to go with Finn to find Clarke, I chose to follow Emerson inside the Mountain, I chose to get myself drilled to save Abbie, I chose to stay back with Raven and Sinclair in the Mountain, I chose to get on Selene and leave Arkadia, I chose to go back in and I chose to go help Monty." -she emphasized each 'I' as if her life depended on it- "I know you think each of those times the call was yours but the truth is it never was; it's always been mine: I could have chosen to stay safe and ignore the people that needed help but I didn't and I never will." -she wiped the tears from her eyes- "My life and my blood are on my hands, not on yours. Ever. I'm too selfish and stubborn to let anyone make those choices or bear them for me. Especially not you, Bellamy. I'm sorry if I ever made you feel otherwise, it won't happen again."

I stared at her in awe as she enumerated each time that had been torturing me since it happened like she knew I needed to be cleared from all of them.  _We've had this conversation just yesterday, but right now, with the mention of each specific time and the reasoning... From her point of view, I really had no saying at all. Then, why do I felt so guilty about all of it?_

-    "Maybe the choice was yours, Sam, but I didn't help you at all and I'm so sorry for that."

I rose my hand to cup her face, craving to touch her and I felt her lean slightly into my touch; her cheek was warm and slightly wet from the tears as she smiled softly at me. Too soon, she rose her own hand to take mine and move it away from her.

-    "I should have been the one to protect you from my darkness." -she placed my hand over my leg and let go- "Look what it did to you... it broke you."

\- "Sam, no... Don't do that, what I've done it's not your fault."

\- "I told you I was broken, that I hurt the people around me... I wish I had been wrong."

And then, it all clicked in my mind.

\- "Sam, no; this is about me not being able to protect the one I love most."

\- "I don't need protection, Bellamy, I need loyalty." -she rose from the couch.

\- "But, Sam..."

\- "If anything, you should protect everyone else from me... I thought loosing you to death would have been painful, but realizing I've lost you to my own demons...." -I felt my heart break as she sniffled and ended her sentence- "...that's been worse. I'm sorry I couldn't stop myself from falling for you and I'm sorry for almost destroying you in the process."


	19. A dangerous game.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taking turns to keep an eye on Raven seems like the best idea, but is it really?

**BELLAMY'S POV**

I couldn't let Sam think her darkness had broken me, I couldn't let her think she was to blame for what I had become; it had never been her fault, I just was never good at dealing with emotions; I had only been able to open up to her and, once I decided she was better off without me, everything got bottled up and I eventually lashed out. And I still had to ask her about what Octavia had insinuated earlier that day: I didn't feel anything for Clarke and I needed to make sure Sam knew; but I never got the chance.

\- "Shut up! Shut up!" –Clarke started screaming from the room where she was with Raven, taking the first watch.

Sam rubbed her face once more, getting rid of any tears left on it and immediately moved from her spot towards the room; I followed her, entering the room and seeing Clarke bleeding from her arm and blood on Raven's face.

\- "You're done ALIE! You hear me? We're gonna fry you." –Clarke started screaming.

\- "Get her out of here." –Sam commanded me.

I pulled Clarke away, stumbling across the room and almost bumping into Jasper who had come inside to check what was going on. Once I got Clarke to calm down, I realized Sam had stayed with Raven.

**\---------------**

**SAM'S POV**

Raven looked at Bellamy pull Clarke away, her eyes so big and a look of pure madness in her face. She then, suddenly, snapped her head to look in front of her and so did I, but I couldn't see anything.  _ALIE must be there._

\- "Would you let me clean that blood or will but bite me too?"

\- "Samantha." –Raven's head snapped on my direction and her voice became somewhat softer as she focused on me- "I won't hurt you, Sam."

\- "Will you hurt yourself again while I go to look for some water?"

\- "I gave you my word."

\- "Actions are what I need these days." –I eyed Raven before glancing quickly to where she had been looking at- "What does ALIE look like?"

\- "Take the chip, find out."

I shook my head and left the room. I wonder what she did to break Clarke like that.

\- "Niylah." –I called when I was sure Raven wouldn't hear me- "Do you have any clean cloths I could borrow?"

\- "Yeah." –she went to one of the walls and started looking inside the drawers of one of the pieces of furniture there- "Here. You need anything else?"

\- "Clean water, yes, please."

Niylah nodded at me and left to another room to get the water for me.

\- "What are you doing?" –Clarke appeared beside me holding her arm, followed by Bellamy carrying some clean bandages.

\- "I'm taking care of Raven's body, what does it look like?" –I faced her, raising an eyebrow and looking at her arm- "Sit down, I'll take care of you first."

\- "Sam..."

\- "It's okay." –I motioned for her to sit down- "I don't need more blood spilled all over the floor right now."

\- "What's the plan now?" –Clarke asked as I sat down next to her, cleaning her wound.

\- "Survive." –I looked up at her for a moment- "Like we always have."

\- "And what about Raven?" –Bellamy sat behind me, handing me one of the bandages.

\- "I'm sorry." –Clarke looked at him- "I let her get to me."

\- "You don't say."

Niylah came back and motioned me to let me know she was leaving what I needed in the table. We have asked her to stay away from the room where Raven was because Pike's people had been here and, if they had been chipped, they'd know where we were. I nodded at her and she left again into another room.

**\----------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

\- "Well, you're all done, Clarke." –Sam finished tying up the bandage on Clarke's arm, leaving the rest on the floor in front of her- "I'll go in now."

\- "No." –I pushed her down on the sofa again- "I'll go."

\- "You don't get to give me orders, Blake."

\- "If she got to Clarke, she'll get to you."

\- "And she won't get to you?" –she scoffed, raising an eyebrow at me as she pushed my hand away- "I'm going in to take care of Raven's body, I told her I would and ALIE was fine with it."

\- "And then what?"

\- "Then I keep an eye on her." –she rose up- "It's my turn."

\- "She'll try to break you, Sam."

\- "I know, Clarke, but there's nothing ALIE can say to me that I haven't said to myself before."

\- "Sam..." –I rose from the sofa and followed her to the other table.

\- "You both think of something." –she took a bowl with water and a couple cloths with her and started to walk towards the room where Raven was- "My mind is stronger than the credit you both are giving me. It's quite sad really." –she glanced at me with a small smile on her face, letting me know she was joking- "I may even have to consider feeling offended."

And with that, she entered the room where Raven was.

\- "What was that supposed to mean?" –Clarke looked at me over her shoulder.

\- "Which part?" –I asked, still looking towards the curtain behind which Sam had disappeared.

\- "When she said there's nothing ALIE can say to break her."

\- "I don't know."

But I did, only Clarke didn't need to know. Since we first met, I had learned to understand the way in which Sam's mind worked; I thought after Mount Weather and during the three months of peace we had, she had let go of her self-destructive habits and thoughts, but I had been wrong, and those words had only been a confirmation of that while she also made a reference only I was supposed to understand: whatever ALIE knew or had on Sam could never be as dark as the darkness she thought she had inside her. Sam was well aware that her own self-destructive behavior would harm her, but she also knew it was the best shot to keep Raven contained; I knew she wouldn't break as much as ALIE tried.

\- "Maybe we should take turns to keep an eye on Raven in pairs." –Clarke mumbled, making me focus back on what we were doing.

\- "I'll go in with Sam."

**\---------------**

**SAM'S POV**

I knew for a fact I was mentally stronger than Bellamy right now and the last thing I needed now was him getting his buttons pushed and doing something he would regret; just like the last time.

\- "Alright, ALIE." –I entered the room- "I'm back to take care of my friend's body."

\- "It's me Sam."

\- "I highly doubt it." –I sat down on the bed and left the bowl with water in front of me- "I need you to keep your face straight and mouth closed, alright?"

\- "I want to speak with you."

\- "We can do that once I'm finished, alright, ALIE?" –Raven eyed me slowly- "I promise. You got Raven's memories, you know I don't lie."

Raven looked in front of her again for a moment and then looked at me and nodded. She stood completely still as I wet the cloth and cleaned her face from the dirt and Clarke's blood.

\- "You thirsty?" –I spoke again, leaving the cloth inside the now filled with red water bowl- "I can bring you something to drink if you want."

\- "There's no need for that in The City of Light."

\- "Cool, but here, in the real world, if you don't take care of your body, it shuts down."

The curtain behind me opened, revealing Bellamy.

**\---------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

\- "What are you doing in here?" –Sam abruptly raised from the bed as she saw me.

\- "We've decided it's best to work in pairs."

\- "I hope you're not trying to babysit me..." –she took the bowl in her hands and smiled at me- "...because if that's what you're trying, I'll break your legs."

She walked past me, trying to leave the room but I stopped her and lowered my voice.

\- "We have to talk."

\- "We already have." –she looked up at me- "Did you forget I'm pushing you away from my darkness?"

\- "You're not doing that." –I firmly stated- "I don't want you to push me away."

\- "Too bad I've already made up my mind."

\- "About what."

\- "About breaking my heart to save yours."

\- "Sam..."

\- "Shh." –she walked towards the curtain- "I'll be back."

She left the room to get rid of the bloody water as I felt my heart sank, yet again.  _This is not what I wanted._  Then, I realized.  _She's doing exactly as I did after the explosion: she's pushing me away thinking she'll save me that way. If this is how she felt when I acted that way, I don't understand how she copped with it; I already want to pin her to a wall and make her listen to me and possibly kiss her like it's my last fucking day on Earth._

\- "Trouble in paradise?" –Raven's voice brought me back.

\- "Shut up, ALIE."

I moved towards the chair on the other side of the room and I braced myself for whatever was to come.

\- "Well, aren't we going to have fun."

Raven was looking at me with hunger in her eyes making me feel the need to move away when the curtain opened, but it wasn't Sam the one who came in; it was Jasper.

\- "Well, well, well." –Raven looked at him- "What happened with Sam?"

Jasper ignored her and sat on the chair next to me and looked at me.

\- "I saw her coming out and I thought I'd come in and do something useful."

I nodded, not totally sold on the idea but letting it go as Jasper sat back and relaxed on his chair. _It's not like I can talk to Sam while we have to take care of Raven._

\- "Look at your united front." –Raven spoke after a couple minutes of peaceful silence- "Tell me, why do you give Bellamy a pass for murdering your girlfriend?" –Raven addressed Jasper as I rose my head from my hands, realizing this was a bad idea- "What was her name?"

\- "Don't talk about Maya."

\- "You don't have to listen to this." –I looked at Jasper- "You..."

\- "Let's protect Jasper." –Raven cut me off- "Jasper's so sensitive, Jasper's lost someone... everyone, cater to his feelings! Well, we've all lost someone, you don't see us falling apart, you don't see us getting wasted, being useless..."

\- "No." –Jasper spoke- "You took a pill to take your pain away. You gave up your memories, all of them."

\- "But then, why should we expect anything more?" –Raven kept talking, completely ignoring Jasper's words- "You used to get high off people's medicine; being a selfish loser was your only move."

\- "Stop."

\- "That's all we see when we look at you." –Raven was pushing him- "Even Sam, she only feels pity for you; that's the only reason she even spares a glance at you." –Raven smiled as Jasper clenched his fists- "And you're sat there, next to the man that's caused you, and her, so much pain, the man that took away from you the chance of saving... what's her name?"

\- "You know her name!" –Jasper jumped from his sit as ALIE finally got to him- "Leave Maya out of this!"

\- "Jasper!" –I was quick to push him back, making him face me- "Think. It's not Raven talking."

\- "I told you not to hurt Jasper." –Sam's hard voice made us both turn around- "So much for promises ALIE." –she approached us- "Hey, J. Nothing of what ALIE's said is true, okay? Trust me, she's just playing with your mind; don't let her." –she squeezed his shoulders- "Come with me."

And with that, she took Jasper out of there, leaving me alone again with Raven, which seemed to please her.

\- "So, finally just you and me, huh?" –Raven faced me- "Oh, come on, Bellamy. We've had our fun together, haven't we?" –I tried to remain as impassive as possible- "It's okay, we don't have to talk about the first time you betrayed Sam. Not much to talk about anyway..." –she looked at me up and down- "I hope you're doing better with Sam." –she smiled- "But I do have one question... does it bother you that you don't get any credit for the genocide at Mount Weather?" –I shook my head, not wanting to hear any of it- "Clarke gets to be the Commander of Death but you murdered all those people too and you're just forgotten. Then again, you didn't get any credit for the culling on the Ark either; how many people suffocated when you threw away my radio?"

\- "300." –Sam entered the room- "I didn't get any credit for that one either and you don't see me whining about it, ALIE."

\- "At least Clarke was saving her own people but you, you were just saving your own ass." –she looked at Sam- "And you probably just helped him to get him to touch you, didn't you?" –Raven chuckled- "Little-virgin-touch-starved Sam, wanting to be touched by the King of the camp, and it all went according to plan, huh?"

\- "Wao." –Sam laughed, looking amusedly at Raven- "And here I was, thinking you were going to try to break me by mentioning how I suck at literally everything..." –she laid back on her chair- "And the best you can do is talk about me having sex with Bellamy? I'm quite disappointed ALIE, I know you can do better than that or else Raven would have never taken the chip. Wanna break me? Try harder."

I was impressed with how well Sam was taking everything ALIE was throwing at her; I also knew she was trying to shift the focus towards her, because that's what she was best at: protecting everyone by becoming the target.

\- "Yeah, that's nothing really..." –Raven looked at me- "Compared to killing your own mom."

 _She went there._  I had to take a deep breath to calm down and I glanced at Sam for a second; she was good at not letting her feelings show, but I knew her and I did notice the slight change in her expression; my best guest was she was trying to contain herself not to hurt Raven.

\- "You just had to take your little sister to her first dance; you might as well just have shoved Aurora out the airlock yourself. Do you think she'd be proud of you now? Of the kind of leader you've become? Or would she see the truth like the rest of us do?"

\- "What truth exactly is that?" –Sam straightened herself, reclaiming ALIE's attention- "That he is a brave and confident man that would do just about anything to protect those he loves most? That he's caring and compassionate behind that emotionless façade he likes to put up? Because if that's not what you're seeing, then you're wrong."

\- "Sam..."

\- "Oh, but you're wrong." –Raven cut me off and focused on Sam- "You, out of everyone should know that he's not a leader... He's a follower: he's just Clarke's lapdog."

 _This is the last topic I needed to come up._  Raven smiled as she noticed the change in the atmosphere of the room, probably because I shifted uncomfortably on my seat; as she realized what she had done, she focused back on me.

\- "But deep down, Sam knows." -she continued- "Clarke's been back for one day and you're already taking orders from her: the good little knight by his queen's side. Too bad you've never been that devoted to Sam... It took Clarke getting in real danger for Sam to find out that you'd risk her life to save Clarke's..." –she looked at Sam- "Maybe he doesn't love you as much as he made you believe... Too bad you fell for it, he's been playing you all this time, 'the one' is nothing more than a player and you his favorite toy."

\- "Raven, enough."

This time it was me the one jumping from the chair. Raven smiled, pleased with herself at my reaction; I realized all too late those words weren't meant to trigger Sam, but me.

\- "Hey." –I felt Sam's hand on my shoulder- "I told you, I got this. Leave."

\- "I'm not leaving you alone."

\- "It wouldn't exactly be the first time, would it?" -Raven spoke behind us.

\- "Then I need you not to listen to her. Can you do that?"

I nodded and sat back down, avoiding Raven's gaze that I knew was following my every move. She only had to break Sam now and I was not looking forward to it.

\- "Always so ready to defend him, Sam." –Raven spoke, following Sam with her eyes as she sat back down next to me- "Why?"

\- "Why what?" –Sam rested her face on her hand, almost looking entertained.

\- "Why are you always so ready to jump in between him and danger."

\- "So, tell me, as a robot, can you feel emotions, ALIE?"

Sam knew what she was doing, she wouldn't let ALIE get to her and I hoped I had been able to see through ALIE's tricks too.

\- "Why are you avoiding the question?"

\- "Why are you asking me a question you already know the answer for? You have Raven's memories, the answer is there."

\- "Love is such a complex feeling."

\- "Well." –Sam chuckled and I eyed her surprised- "Tell me about it."

\- "Aren't you mad he treated you like that? Like you were always going to be there no matter what he did?" –Raven looked at me- "And you were right; after all you've done, she's still trying to protect you; after realizing she's not your first choice."

\- "I'm not mad, I know I'm expendable." –Sam's voice was calm and collected- "That's the whole reason I ended up down here ALIE, you have Jaha's memories too, I'm sure you know all about my story by now."

\- "I know you've always risked your life for others not expecting anything in return." –Raven spoke again- "But, even if that's who you are... You would expect at least the one for you would put you before everyone else."

Sam's rolled her eyes before focusing them back on Raven as she sighed.

\- "You know what? Raven, I love you." –she leaned back on the chair- "And all you're saying it's true, ALIE, but I've always known I was and will never be good enough and I've made my peace with not being the first choice, maybe not even the second one, so you aren't telling me anything new. The truth is we could be here for months and you wouldn't be able to get to my head, I am my own worst enemy."

\- "I could have helped with the pain."

\- "Yeah, maybe you're right."

\- "I still can help you."

\- "Help me know? You're too late."

\- "Your pain is still there. I can take it away."

\- "You're not trying to help me with my pain, you only want my memories. I'm not stupid, ALIE; you want access to my brain, to my knowledge of everyone still un-chipped; you want to know the secrets I know about them, their fears, their demons... so that you'll get information and learn the best ways to torture them into joining you. I won't."

\- "After all you've done for them and how they've repaid you, you wanna feel all that? I already got to Bellamy once, what makes you think I won't again?"

\- "If you take the pain and the anger away from me, I'm nothing." –Sam smiled- "You won't get to him anymore because I'm the one keeping an eye on you, wanna get to him? You gotta get through me."

\- "Sam..." –I started, unable to listen to Sam speak of herself like that any longer.

\- "Bellamy, no." –she was quick to brush me off- "Stay out of this."

\- "Consider your options Sam. The City of Light is beautiful, everything you've always wanted: acceptance and validation."

\- "All I ever wanted was to die, ALIE... I honestly thought I'd be dead by now but it's not as easy as it seems." –Sam straightened on her seat- "Besides, there's people I care about that need me now, it's too late to die."

\- "I know." –Raven smiled- "I promise you, if you take the key and join me in The City of Light, you have my word no one will hurt Octavia."

\- "I don't care who it is, chipped or not, if anyone touches my sister, I'll kill them."

\- "Even if it were me?"

Raven's voice had gone back to normal, her body even looked smaller and more fragile; it was as if Raven was really back. It was a good trick but Sam knew better than that; she chuckled darkly.

\- "You're not Raven."

\- "And what if it were Bellamy?" –Raven pointed her head at me bu Sam didn't move- "I mean, you said you'd avenge Ion's dead but Bellamy's still alive. He took a gun and slaughtered the entire army that was sent to protect us..."

\- "You!" –Niylah came running into the room, Sam and I both rose from our chairs immediately as Niylah face me and slapped my face- "You killed my father!" –she looked at Sam now- "And you knew about it? Kill him." –Sam tensed beside me- "I'm calling in that favor, kill him like he killed my father!"

\- "Niylah!" –Clarke came inside- "You can't be in here!" –she pulled her back.

\- "It's too late." –Jasper rested against the wall- "Raven's already seen her; Alie knows where we are."

Sam followed Jasper out of the room as I took a second to go through what had just happened.  _It's my fault, again. I took my jacket and I sprinted outside of the house._

\- "Fuck!"

I yelled as I kicked down an empty barrel and punched some type of wooden and metallic structure, cutting my hand. The tears filled my eyes; rage and regret all I could feel now.

\- "Feeling better?" –Niylah spoke behind me, sword in hand.

\- "All I wanted was to protect my people."

\- "By destroying mine."

\- "I'm sorry."

\- "People like you always are."

She secured her grip on the sword and I was pretty sure her intention was to use it on me.

\- "Wait!" –Sam came running out of the house, not even wearing her jacket and positioning herself in between Niylah and me- "I'm sorry, Niylah, I can't do it." –Sam took a step towards Niylah, placing her hands on the blade of her sword and moving the tip to her stomach- "I can't kill Bellamy and I can't let you kill him, but I'll take the blade. Kill me, ease your anger."

\- "Sam, no. You can't take the blame for every single thing I've done." –I walked up to her, trying to push her back and away from the blade.

\- "He's right." –Niylah spoke looking at Sam- "You, Jusheda, had nothing to do with the massacre, you lost people there too." –she looked at me- "You'll have to live with your actions and the remorse, that's worse than dying." –she glanced at Sam again- "I'll call that favor some other time."

\- "Thank you." -Sam breathed out.

Niylah nodded and got back in the house as Sam sighed in relief, resting her hands on her knees and letting her head fall forward slightly.

\- "You need to stop doing that, Sam." -I spoke moving in front of her.

\- "Out of all the things I've been doing that you don't approve of..." -she rose her head to look at me- "...which one are you referring to this time?"

\- "Offering your life in exchange for mine."

\- "You're not dying on my watch." –she smiled as she shivered.

\- "Here." – I took off my jacket and gave it to her- "Put it on."

\- "Or we could just go inside." –she raised her eyebrow but put it on nonetheless.

\- "Can you stand being alone with me for a moment?"

\- "I'd very much like to lie and say 'no'." -I couldn't help but smile at her words- "You're gonna get cold."

\- "We have to talk."

\- "We already have. I can't... I won't watch you break because of me, I'm not that selfish."

\- "Sam, don't do that. You're doing exactly as I did after the explosion."

\- "What are you talking about?"

\- "I pushed you away because I thought I was the cause of all your problems, only for you to make me realize each final call was yours, right?"

\- "Yeah." –she nodded- "What does that have to do with any of this?"

\- "You're the one pushing me away now because you think your actions are the reason I lashed out, but the truth is I lashed out because I pushed you away, leaving me no one to talk to."

\- "So, you're telling me you lashed out because I wasn't there." –I nodded all too soon, failing to realize what she was thinking- "Then it's still my fault."

\- "No." –I placed my hands on her shoulders- "This is not your fault and I need you to see that."

\- "I'm not so sure, love." –she spoke and I could see in her eyes the nickname had slipped off her tongue- "I still think if we hadn't gotten together, you'd have found someone better for you."

\- "Are you talking about Clarke?"

\- "Not necessarily."

\- "Sam, O told me."

\- "I don't blame you, I'd chose Clarke too." –she sighed, hugging herself- "It's exactly the same with ALIE, she doesn't want me, she wants both of you. It's never been about me."

\- "Sam, don't do that."

\- "I'm just a pawn in her big chest game. You're the King and Clarke's the Queen; it's been like that since we landed."

\- "Sam, you're the only Queen I'd ever bow down to." –I took her face in my hands- "You're the only one I'd swear loyalty to."

\- "Maybe it'd have been easier if I had taken a spot as one of the 100's leaders, but I'm no Queen." –she chuckled placing her cold hands on my face- "Don't ever bow down to anyone, Bell, our freedom is the best thing that we got from landing here."

\- "You're wrong." –I pulled her closer- "The best thing I got from this planet is you. I know you broke up with me and you had every right to do so and move on because I've only hurt you, and I can only hope you'll be able to forgive me sometime..."

\- "I don't have to forgive you for anything, Bellamy. You have to forgive yourself to be able to move on and heal."

\- "And..." –I continued what I had been saying before she cut me off- "...pushing me away won't stop me from loving you and waiting for you."

\- "Bellamy, no..." –she tried to look down but I wasn't finished.

\- "You know I told Monty I didn't want to choose between you and Clarke."

\- "And I'd much rather not know why or see you in that position because I honestly wouldn't choose me..." –seeing I wasn't letting go, she simply let her weight fall totally on me so that I had to let go of her face and hold her in my arms, which I didn't mind at all, my body missed hers- "...and you shouldn't either."

\- "You don't get to choose for me." –I smiled rubbing her back- "Look at me, I have a confession to make."

\- "Can we not do this now?" –she sighed against my chest.

\- "Please, Sam. I'm not asking you to take me back, I just need to clear this."

I knew Sam all too well; she was trying to put back up the wall she had around her since her grandma died and that, for some reason, she had let down for me to know her. And I knew she had it so wrapped around her head that she was bad for me that she was trying to grab onto whatever she could to push me away, even if that meant breaking her heart and poisoning her mind with insecurity and jealously... without realizing she was breaking my own heart in that process too.  _So fucking stubborn, my love._

\- "I'd much rather see you being yourself with someone else than break you just to call you mine." -she looked up at me- "So, just... let me break my heart this time." –she whispered pushing me away- "Let me save you for once."


	20. Seinheda.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Octavia, Sheda and Monty come back from the dropship and our group works to get Raven back and save her from A.L.I.E.

**SAM'S POV**

I was really trying to push Bellamy away but he wasn't making it as easy as I hoped it'd be.  _If he breaks every time I'm around him why the fuck would he want me to stay, it makes no sense._

\- "Sam, you're hurting us both by doing this."

\- "No, I'm trying to save you so just... just let me be the bigger person for once." –I started to take off his jacket- "Here, let's go back inside."

\- "Keep it."

His voice was soft as he pulled the jacket back over my shoulders; I sighed knowing fully well I wasn't going to win this one, so I gave up. His fingers brushed over my left arm and, before I could stop him, he moved the strap of my top to the side, revealing the bullet wound.

\- "Did it hurt?" -his jaw was clenched and his voice was hard, but I knew that had more to do with his regret than with being pissed at me.

\- "Trust me, landing with my face on the ground hurt much more." -I chuckled as I tried to lighten up the situation- "It was more the surprise than anything else."

\- "I'm sorry."

\- "Stop apologizing." –I moved his hand away from my body- "You haven't pulled any trigger against me just yet."

\- "And I never would." -he moved his hand up to my cheek but I moved back, I knew fully well if I allowed myself to be close to him, I'd go back and break him again; I couldn't do that to him- "You have to trust me, Sam."

\- "Yeah, let's just not make any more promises, alright?"

\- "But I..."

The engine of the Rover sounded in the distance seconds before its lights illuminated the house's entrance.  _Saved by the bell, ironic._

\- "Finally."

I breathed out relieved, moving away from Bellamy and towards the Rover.  _That was close, too damn close. I can't allow myself to feel, it's too hard... it's too painful. This is the fucking reason we had promised to ourselves to never let anyone else in, but no... let's fall for Bellamy... it'd be a good idea... love is a good thing, you deserve love..._ I shook my head annoyed at myself.  _I don't need any of this right now; we have a job to do. Focus._  Monty was the first to get out closely followed by Octavia and Sheda; however, he didn't say a thing as he walked past me.

\- "What happened?" –Bellamy asked, placing himself beside me.

\- "Who was it?"

I looked at Octavia and Sheda; both had blood on their faces and clothes but it clearly wasn't theirs.

\- "We had chipped company." –Octavia faced me.

\- "Hannah?" –I asked and she nodded- "Did he..."

I didn't even finish the sentence as Octavia nodded again.  _Well, fuck. I never liked the woman but this... I understand what Monty must be going through, that's gonna take a toll on him._

\- "We should get inside to help your friend." –Sheda looked at me and I nodded.

\- "I'm just glad the three of you came back in one piece."

**\---------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

_All I ask is for a moment alone with Sam but, once we're finally together, something always happens._  As we got back in the house, everyone got inside the room in which Raven was tied up to the bed as Sinclair explained what we had to do.

\- "All we have to do is connect her and activate the electromagnet."

\- "Alright, seems doable."

Sam moved to one side of the bed as Monty started to untie her left arm when Raven started fighting back.

\- "Raven, stop! You're bleeding again."

\- "Hold her still!"

It was chaos. Raven kept fighting back and we all had to work together to hold her still but, once we managed that, she started to bump her head with the metallic headboard.

\- "She's trying to kill herself."

I realized what she was trying to do, so I moved where Monty was and tried to help him hold her still.

\- "O, hold her."

Sam yelled to O, who immediately took Raven's right arm and pulled her still as Sam moved back slightly, taking a pillow that was on the floor.  _Clever girl._  She then placed it in between Raven's head and the headboard before pulling her back by the forehead, immobilizing Raven's head.

\- "I'm not having this shit A.L.I.E."

\- "If you kill Raven, you'll never have this." –Clarke took out the chip she had been carrying and Raven stopped fighting us all for a second that I used to put the wristband on her left wrist, before she started fighting back again with even more strength.

\- "You lied!" –Raven yelled- "You lied!"

\- "I know this is most probably not the time..." –Sam argued pulling Raven back- "...but you are the last one that should be talking about lies... ugh stop, fighting, fuck! You promised me you wouldn't hurt Raven and I want my friend back..."

\- "Wait, you can't do this." –Raven's voice was back to normal- "The EMP will give me brain damage." –Raven cried out and I saw Sam hesitate as her grip on Raven's head loosened- "Please, don't do this."

\- "Sam." –Octavia called her- "Don't listen to her. A.L.I.E. will try anything to keep Raven."

\- "We only got one shot at this." –Sinclair reminded us as Raven kept yelling at each of us to stop- "The EMP will fry the wristband too."

\- "Do it." –I commanded him.

\- "Got it!"

Monty nodded and pushed the button; we all stood still, waiting for something to happen.

\- "What's happening?" –Jasper, who was pushing Raven's legs down, asked next to Octavia.

\- "Nothing." –Sinclair checked the device he had built- "We need more power. The battery's not strong enough."

\- "Well, then get one that is!" –Clarke yelled from the bottom of the bed.

\- "The rover!" –Monty realized as Sinclair looked at him and nodded.

\- "Sheda, help him!"

Sam yelled and Sheda immediately run out of the door, following Monty as Sinclair prepared to connect the device to the new power source. As we were trying to keep Raven down, we heard something metallic crushing and Sam's head immediately snapped towards the door, which soon revealed Monty carrying the battery and Sheda with a bow in hand.

\- "What was that?"

\- "Drone."

\- "She's here." –Monty elaborated.

\- "We have to make this quick." –I rushed him.

Soon enough, Sinclair and Monty had the device connected to the Rover's battery and, as they turned it on, Raven started screaming before going limp.

\- "No, no, no!" –Sam panicked as she moved her hands to Raven's neck- "I..."

I saw her hands shaking and realized she wouldn't find her pulse even if it were there, so I took her hand in mine, moving it away and checking Raven's pulse with my other.

\- "She's breathing."

Octavia and Sam, one at each side of the bed, started calling for Raven to wake up, but she wasn't responding.

\- "Clarke, what's happening?" –Sam turned to face her.

\- "I... I don't know."

\- "Raven, I need you to wake up." –Sam caressed her cheek but nothing happened- "Please."

\- "She warned us." –Jasper spoke as he paced the room.

Sam straightened herself, letting go of my hand which she probably hadn't even realized was still holding, and looked at Jasper; for a second, I thought she might hurt him but then she turned to Sheda.

\- "Were there more drones?"

\- "Not that we saw, why?"

\- "I need to shoot something before I break anyone's face."

\- "You need to learn to control your rage, Sam, we've talked about this..."

\- "My way of controlling it is by breaking things." –Sam walked past him towards the door- "But I don't want to trash Niylah's house." -she turned around- "Or you could fight me."

\- "Sam, if there are more drones outside..."

I started but then Clarke and Jasper started yelling at each other and we all turned our attention to them.

\- "What are you doing?" –Clarke yelled as we turned around to see Jasper carrying a metal tool in one hand while he placed Clarke's chip on the table, ready to smash it to pieces.

\- "Don't move." –Jasper threatened her.

\- "No, you can't. Give it back."

\- "A.L.I.E. did that to Raven! She's never gonna get this."

\- "Don't! Stop!" –Clarke's voice was high and panicked- "That's Lexa!" –Jasper looked at her- "Part of her is still in there. I saw Titus get it out of her head, I'm not..."

And then, she stopped talking; not because she didn't know what to say but because she had just realized something.

\- "Clarke...?" –Sam questioned.

\- "What is it?" –I ended.

\- "Both AI's were made by the same person." –she faced us- "Both tap into human consciousness... they must work similarly..." –she looked at Sinclair and Monty- "...right?"

\- "Well..." –Sinclair started- "There's probably only one pathway to consciousness, so it's possible, yeah."

\- "What does this have to do with anything?" –Octavia asked, still by Raven's side.

\- "I've seen an AI get removed before."

\- "Meaning, what exactly?" –Sam moved next to Octavia again.

\- "I know what to do." –Clarke looked at Sam- "Help me get her on her side."

Between all of us, we moved Raven down on the bed and onto her side, her back to Clarke as she asked Monty to get her med-kit; she then took a scalpel out of it and moved Raven's hair out of the way.

\- "Hey." –Sinclair stopped her- "What are you doing?"

\- "It's okay." –she moved and started to make a small incision on the back of Raven's neck.

\- "I'm so glad right now that she's not awake for this."

Sam whispered as Clarke nodded at her once she finished the cut, which started bleeding. Clarke placed a cloth under it and waited.

\- "This has to work."

Octavia moved her hand to Sam's and squeezed it. Suddenly, something solid started to come out of Raven's wound; it was like extremely small pieces of a chip.

\- "What is that?" –I asked looking at it.

\- "It must be whatever's left of the chip."

Sinclair ended and, as if it had been completely coordinated, Raven started coughing as she came back to consciousness.

\- "Oh my God, Raven!" –Sam kneeled beside her and looked up at Clarke for a moment- "You did it, Clarke!"

In between the two, they helped Raven on her back; she immediately moved her hand to the back of her neck in pain before we slowly sat her back up.

\- "I never thought I'd be so happy to see someone in pain." –Octavia chuckled.

\- "Yeah, welcome back, Reyes!" -Sam smiled- "I was really starting to worry we were going to lose the badass of the team."

Sam laughed as Raven turned her face to look at them while Sinclair took care of the wound; but happiness was short-lived in the room as Monty spoke.

\- "I could have saved my mom."

\- "Hey..." –Jasper moved to comfort him.

\- "Get the hell away from me!"

Monty pushed him away and stormed out of the room.  _Everything is so fucked up right now, but we don't have much time._

\- "A.L.I.E. knows we're here." –I spoke trying to move on from what just happened- "We have to go."

**\---------------------**

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

As Raven came back to her senses and we realized we had to get out of there, Sam and I went to talk with Niylah while Clarke collected her things, Sinclair and Jasper helped Raven, and Bellamy, Sheda and Monty moved outside to put the Rover's battery back on its place and keep an eye for more drones.

\- "Niylah." –Sam spoke first- "Thank you, for everything."

\- "We're leaving now." –I glanced around and saw a pile of clothes- "Do you mind..."

Niylah motioned me to go ahead and I pulled Sam with me.

\- "You need new clothes too." –I glanced up at her from the pile- "That jacket..."

\- "It's Bellamy's." –I raised an eyebrow at her, not because I didn't know it was his, but because I didn't know how she ended up wearing it- "It's a long story... but basically I run out of the house in my top and he lend it to me."

\- "Anything else I need to know about?"

\- "I've made my choice." –Sam spoke as she took of the jacket- "We spoke while you were gone and I realized what broke him were my own demons so I'm staying away from him."

\- "Sam..."

\- "No. This is my choice to bear."

\- "What choice is even this?"

\- "I'll break my heart to save him." –she solemnly spoke as she started changing clothes- "And if I see my darkness hurting you, I'll push you away too. I'm not worth the pain."

I wasn't sure what she meant by all that but I didn't need to either.  _Maybe Bellamy isn't willing to keep up with Sam, but I am and I intended on doing so until the end. Sam's been with me since we landed, if there's anyone left down here worth my time and love, that's Sam. And I'll make sure she knows she's my first choice._

\- "You are worth everything, Sam; you're my sister." –I smiled at her as we finished- "I'll make sure my own demons won't catch you."

She shook her head smiling as she put on another jacket and picked up Bellamy's. I didn't know if they had talked about everything nor if she letting go had anything to do with Bellamy's feelings, with her own or with the war, but I knew, whatever it was, leaving Bellamy behind had been a tough decision for her; she didn't have to tell me, her feelings were crystal clear to me in her eyes.

\- "We may as well make a pact right now." –I spoke, catching her attention again, trying to ease her mind.

\- "A pact?" –she faced me, eyebrows furrowed- "About what exactly? And how?"

\- "A blood pact if you wish, Jusheda."

\- "Just because I'm the Commander of Blood doesn't mean I want yours." -she laughed- "What do you really want, O?" –she rose her eyebrows, slightly entertained.

\- "We're family..." –I looked at her blades- "We're bound together."

\- "Oh, I see." -she smirked at me- "You're really trying to tie the knot with me, aren't you?"

She laughed as I smiled; then, she took off the new jacket, revealing one of her arms and took one of her blades and made a small cut over her forearm.

\- "I won't say no to such offer."

She handed me the blade and I mimicked her movements, taking the blood with my other hand and offering it for Sam to shake.

\- "Ogeda kom taim eno." –she took my hand in hers. [Together until the end]

\- "Ai sistris, ai seingeda." [My sister, my family]

And with that, it was settled; it wouldn't matter where we ended for, at the end of the day, Sam was my family and I was hers, and I was content with that. We quickly cleaned our wounds and I let her cleaning her blade and putting on the vest that Sheda had given her long ago to keep her blades as I went to the Rover to find something to give Niylah in exchange for everything we had taken and for taking over her life. I also took Bellamy's jacket with me.

\- "Here." –I handed it to him- "We got new clothes." –I explained as he looked at me confused- "Listen, I know we're not in good terms right now but..."

\- "What happened to your arm?" –he inspected it and I mentally cursed myself for not putting on my jacket first.

\- "Nothing."

\- "O..."

\- "Fine." –I got rid of him, putting on my jacket now- "Not that is any of your business but Sam and I made a blood pact."

\- "A what!?"

\- "The Commander of Blood ought to make pacts with blood, don't you think?"

\- "Sam made you do this?!" -he almost yelled.

\- "Yeah, because we are Grounders and all she wants now is war and pain; we are basically savages now... Look at us." -I rolled my eyes at him- "Fix yourself, Bellamy; did you ever know us?" -I crossed my arms over my chest.

\- "She's gone insane..." -he completely ignored my point- "This is my fault."

\- "First of all, don't give yourself too much credit for what Sam does; and, second of all, if you need to know, it was my idea." –he raised an unimpressed eyebrow- "We pacted to stay together, whatever happens. I'm not letting her go."

\- "She told you..."

\- "Not really and I don't need to know either; that's between you two." -I paused for a second- "But mmm, Bellamy... she's told me she's pushing you away from her demons; I'm not even sure what she means but if you love her you should fight for her... if you don't, just let her go." –I eyed him- "Whatever you do, make sure you know what you truly want first."

\- "I want her." -Bellamy's voice was almost desperate- "She's just doing what I did after the Mountain."

\- "Have you told her that?"

\- "Yeah, but somehow that made it worse... it's like she gave up on me."

\- "No, Sam would never give up on you that's why she's pushing you away, because she thinks she's pulling you down with her..." –and then, as I finally put my thoughts into words, I understood- "She is letting you go because she thinks you'll be better off without her! She's not giving up on you Bellamy..." –I faced him- "She's giving up on herself."

 


	21. She's not mine.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our team decides to move back to Arkadia. During the trip, Bellamy and Sheda have a talk about Sam.

**SAM'S POV**

Once I finished putting my stuff away, I entered the main room to say goodbye to Niylah and leave the place.

-    "What do I owe you?"

-    "Your friend gave me that." –Niylah pointed at a massive lamp- "You don't owe me anything."

-    "That's not true."

-    "You owe me a favor." –she smiled slightly and I nodded.

-    "It won't be safe here for a while, do you have anywhere to go?"

-    "I'll figure something out."

-    "You sure? I can stay back and..."

-    "You have to go help Skaikru." –she made a pause- "And you have to mourn your loses."

-    "Well, considering I gave up the executioner and I can't personally get revenge, mourning will have to do...yeah." –I sighed- "But blood will have blood, I'm sure the new Heda will keep Lexa's word and kill Pike following the innocent-killing-ritual."

-    "Thank you."

-    "There's nothing to thank."

-    "You defended me from your people, I know now what Heda... what Lexa saw on you."

I nodded at Niylah as Clarke entered the room, probably wanting to have a one-on-one conversation with Niylah so I said goodbye and left.

-    "You changed clothes." –Sheda practically bumped into me as I closed the house's door behind me.

-    "Don't worry, I still got the vest." –I smiled at him as we walked up to the Rover- "How else do you expect me to carry these many blades, huh?"

Sheda laughed at my comment and soon we were in front of the Rover's back door, where Sinclair and Octavia were talking with Raven.

-    "How's my best girl feeling?"

-    "My neck hurts." –Raven looked at me- "I'm sorry about everything I said about you and Bellamy..."

-    "Hey, it's okay." –I squeezed her upper arm- "Water under the bridge. You don't have to apologize for anything, that wasn't you."

-    "Thank you."

-    "Where's everyone else?" –Octavia questioned me.

-    "What do you mean? The only one left inside is Clarke."

-    "Oh."

I turned around in time to see Clarke getting out of the house towards Bellamy whom I hadn't seen when I got out myself, so I assumed he had been hiding from me. Clarke took his hand in hers and started inspecting it and I had to tear my eyes from them before I started feeling something.

-    "You okay?" –Octavia squeezed my arm as she stood now beside me.

-    "I'll survive. This is for the greater good."

-    "Are you sure?"

-    "Honestly? No, but it'll have to do."

-    "Hey." –Clarke's voice interrupted us- "Everyone okay?"

-    "Yeah." –Octavia and Sheda answered as I simply nodded.

-    "There's one thing I don't understand, Raven. Why did A.L.I.E. want you to kill yourself?"

-    "Because I know why she wants the second AI."

-    "Why?"

Bellamy and I questioned in unison and I had to stop myself from looking at him, even if I could feel his eyes on me; luckily, Raven kept talking.

-    "Because it's the only thing that can stop her."

-    "Great, then what are we waiting for?"

-    "Yeah, let's stop her." –Octavia squeezed my hand in agreement- "We survive together."

-    "We fight together." –Sheda added.

**\-----------------**

**SHEDA'S POV**

Slowly, every Skaikru agreed with the sisters and me either by nodding or by speaking up. We were going to Arkadia to look for Lincoln's journal.

-    "All right, everyone, get inside." –Bellamy ordered as he moved to the front of the Rover.

Sinclair and Monty helped Raven get inside carefully, followed by Jasper and Clarke as the three of us stayed back.

-    "I'll take Selene." –Sam turned to go towards the horse.

-    "You go in the Rover." –I pulled her back- "I'll take Selene."

-    "That is not happening."

And with that, she left towards where we had left Selene to feed and drink while we were at the trading post.

-    "She needs time alone to think."

-    "Is that why you didn't say anything?"

-    "Yeah." –Octavia moved to enter the Rover- "You gotta go in the front seat now."

-    "Why?"

-    "To get the full Rover experience."

-    "Yeah, sure."

I knew that none of the sisters were exactly in good terms with Bellamy and, considering he had chosen to drive, that was probably why Octavia send me to take that place.  _It's going to be a long ride._  I walked up to the side door and entered, quickly closing it behind me as Bellamy turned his face to look at me; he then looked on the little mirror in between us, and I knew he was looking for Sam.

-    "Where's Sam?" –he asked as he realized she wasn't there.

-    "Don't slow me down, Skaikru."

Sam was now on Selene beside my open window, tying a cloth around her mouth and nose as she urged her horse to go forward with her legs, not letting any of us time to say anything.

-    "She's going to get herself killed one of these days." –Sinclair sighed as Sam disappeared in the almost complete darkness- "You'd think she'd learned by now."

-    "My people won't hurt Sam..." –I spoke, trying to figure out how to move the window up- "The Commander of Blood is safer in these woods than anyone else."

-    "She's not safe from A.L.I.E."

-    "Is anyone?" –I asked, pleased with myself as I closed the window.

-    "Was I the only one that heard her say 'dying is all I ever wanted' when A.L.I.E was in my head? Are we all just going to ignore that?"

-    "That's what she wanted when we landed." –Octavia pointed out- "Now she wants blood, to end A.L.I.E. and space, probably in that order."

-    "You better not stand in her way." –Jasper ended for Octavia- "I'll limit myself to stand by her side; that's the best place to be."

Bellamy sighed beside me, fists and jaw clenched before he took a deep breath and started the Rover to follow Sam.

**\---------------**

**SAM'S POV**

It felt so good moving through the forest alone with Selene, I missed the feeling of freedom and peace. I knew we were going straight into the wolf's mouth but, honestly, I couldn't have cared any less; what worried me the most was how we'd find Lincoln's body and how O would react. I just hoped I'd be able to find it before her; I had seen enough bodies to know Lincoln's would be looking much worse by now.

**\---------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

I followed Sam with the Rover; I knew I could go faster than that but I wasn't about to let Sam alone at night in the middle of the woods, as much as Sheda kept insisting she was safe. At some point during the ride, Sam allowed Selene to slow down; I was sure it had nothing to do with them being tired and I hoped she wasn't trying to stay back. As we got next to her, she turned her face to look at me, realizing she had slowed down. Half of her face was covered but I could still see the familiar smirk on her face before she turned to Selene and, out of nowhere, they started to move faster.

-    "You're going to lose her." –Sheda spoke looking at Sam.

-    "In which sense, exactly?" –I quickly glanced at him.

The rest were too engrossed having a conversation on the back about A.L.I.E. and her creator Becca to notice the change of speed or pay any attention to Sheda and me.

-    "I meant you should make this thing go faster."

-    "What are your intentions with Sam?"

I had to ask, I had to know.

-    "She's my friend."

-    "I'm not stupid Sheda, I've seen the way you look at her."

-    "She loves you."

-    "She broke up with me."

-    "Because of what you did, not because her feelings for you have faltered."

I didn't know how old Sheda was but the way he spoke made me feel like a child, and I didn't like that.

-    "Thank you."

-    "You are thanking me?" –he sounded almost entertained.

I knew he was looking at me, but I couldn't face him completely because I didn't want to bump into a tree or get the rover into a whole or worse... hurt Sam.

-    "For what?"

-    "For taking care of Sam." –I quickly glanced at him and saw him nod- "Sam's always been strong but I know sometimes she needs someone to look out for her or else she'd just..."

-    "Run straight into the most dangerous situation she can find? Oh, I know." –Sheda chuckled- "When we were back in Polis, she got into a fight with one of the warriors from the Ice Nation because he was being rude to a woman from one of the food stands."

-    "Wait, what?" –I had to remind myself that I was driving because we had to get to Arkadia soon and not just having a day trip for fun and I couldn't just stop to process the information.

-    "He was yelling at the woman because whatever he ate was undercook or something, you never know with those guys... the thing is, he was approaching her menacingly; and you know Sam, she went straight to him and pushed him back and away from her as she told him "Why don't you either cook your own food or pick on somebody your own size." –he tried to imitate Sam's voice but failed, almost making me laugh- "The guy looked Sam up and down and almost laughed at her; I had forgotten there were people who still didn't know your girl."

He laughed once more, entertained by his own story but I was too focused on the fact that he had called Sam 'my girl' after I had just told him we weren't together anymore to laugh with him.

-    "She's not my girl."

_And that feels so wrong._

-    "Alright then... I had forgotten there were some people who still didn't know who Sam was, is that better?" –I didn't answer him- "So, Sam was clearly unimpressed. I've seen few people get willingly into a fight with someone kom Azgeda, let alone not show fear for their lives in front of them, but not Sam, of course not; if anything, being underestimated made her even more willing to kick his ass. I tried to get her away from there to avoid the fight but the guy took it the wrong way and you know Sam's doesn't back down from anything, even if she ends up bleeding out."

-    "Meaning?"

**_**FLASHBACK** (SHEDA'S POV)_ **

-    "Sam, it's not worth it, come on."

-    "Yeah, listen to your boyfriend. Heda's guard should know a Skaikru like you is no match for Azgeda."

Sam seemed to relax her posture slightly as he spoke; any other time I'm sure she'd have sprinted towards him and gotten hurt, but not today.

-    "Chomouda dula op yu fir in ai?" [Why do you fear me?]

Sam spoke with a slight mocking undertone that I hoped the Azgeda warrior wouldn't catch.

-    "Ai laik nou." [I'm not] –he stepped forward- "Der laik nou gonakru raun Skaikru." [There are no warriors in Skaikru.]

-    "Taim yu laik krei kiln..." –Sam stepped forward too- "Gonplei ai." [If you're so sure... fight me.]

By now, a crowd had formed around us; it was going to be the show of the day.

-    "Sam, you're a good fight but..."

-    "I know what I'm doing Sheda." –she pushed me back.

-    "I'll prepare the bandages." –I rolled my eyes at her, a habit I had noticed I had picked up from her.

-    "Yes, please." –she flashed me a smile- "He'll need them."

The guy was at least a head taller than Sam and, considering he was from Azgeda, I knew he was well trained but maybe Sam needed a wakeup call; not that I'd let him hurt her but maybe a little scare would keep her on her toes. He approached her ready to hit her, but she was faster and easily dodged the first strike but the second one got to her stomach and she tumbled back.

-    "I thought for this much talking, you'd put up a fight."

-    "Whatever the hell you want."

They kept moving in circles, he trying to get to her and her avoiding him; I knew what she was doing: measuring his movements, memorizing his way of fighting and his foot placement.  _Maybe she does have a chance; after all, I'm the one who's trained her. What am I thinking? Of course, she has a chance!_  As the guy tried to get to her again, Sam lowered down and kicked his shin; he lost his balance and had to take a couple steps backward, time that Sam didn't waste, throwing two punches at him: one at his ribs and one at his jaw. He grunted in pain but managed to hit Sam in the jaw too. She took a step back and spat some blood, but she wasn't finished and neither was him. He moved up to her, hitting her on the ribs once more, almost making Sam fall back from the force. She placed her hands on her knees and for a moment I thought she might have had enough, but I saw her eyeing the guy through the corner of her eye and, once he got ready to throw her to the ground, she quickly moved to the side; the guy didn't have time to stop and slammed against another guy on the crowd who pushed him back into the circle but he didn't even have time to turn around; Sam's foot impacted with his hips, throwing him completely out of balance. She was ready to throw herself over him but I decided that was enough.

-    "Alright, Sam. You've shown him."

-    "You're lucky my friend over here appreciates life more than I do." –Sam looked at the guy on the floor- "If I ever hear you disrespect anyone else like that, you won't be so lucky."

The people around us moved forming a little passage for us to leave that way, but not before the stand's woman came to thank Sam.

-    "Mochof, mochof." [Gracias, gracias]

-    "Ai laik hir gon sis yu au." [I'm here to help]

Sam took the woman's hands in hers and squeezed them lightly.

**_**END OF FLASHBACK**_ **

-    "I took her home to check her wounds and after that, well, let's just say people in Polis know who Sam is now."

-    "That does sound a lot like Sam, yeah." –I smiled as he ended his story- "Is that why they... why you call her Jusheda?"

-    "Well, I'm sure Lexa heard of that fight and it probably added to it but, for what Sam told me, it wasn't Lexa the one who named her that; it was Titus."

-    "Who?"

-    "The Flamekeeper. He was always by Lexa's side but his ideas and his ways are much less diplomatic, a little like Sam I'd say. He heard of that fight and he already knew what she had been doing up until she came to Polis with me... Later, I've learned that he tested Sam, wanting to know where she stood exactly."

-    "What did he do? Or made her do?"

-    "I'm not sure but he was pleased when she showed her intention of getting rid of anyone that threatened her people or tried to; he named her Commander of Blood after that... I guess he sees an ally on Sam. An ally he desperately needed since Lexa was much more of a pacifist than any of the previous Commanders." –Sheda quickly explained- "Lexa went with it; she liked Sam so she named her Trikru too once the blockade was established, to protect her because she knew Sam couldn't go back to Arkadia."

-    "I didn't know that..."

-    "I know you didn't like Lexa because we left you at the Mountain, but she was only trying to protect her people, just like Sam and you do."

-    "I know."

-    "But just because Sam's Jusheda doesn't mean she has to become a heartless assassin or that she has to leave Skaikru; she's as much Trikru as she's Skaikru. I know she wants to leave everything behind and move on but she's who she is because of what happened to her and the way she chose to live after everything."

-    "You know why she got locked up?"

I questioned surprised.  _Maybe they are closer than I thought. Sam wouldn't let anyone into that part of her life if she didn't consider them family._  As far as I knew, only Octavia and I knew about it.

-    "She never told me and I don't need to know. I'm just glad she survived it all to meet her." –he turned to face me as I felt slightly more at ease- "She's so strong... soon enough I won't have anything else to teach her." –he chuckled.

-    "What happens then? When we finish this and each of us go back to their..." –I didn't know how to end that sentence; I didn't want to say home because Arkadia wasn't home for me, it was just where we lived.

-    "I don't know but, whatever it is, I know she'll be alright. Em ste kika."

 _Kika._  The nickname hammered through my ears until it got to my brain almost giving me a headache but instead feeling a sharp pain in the chest.  _That's what he had called her at the blockade line._

-    "It means she's a survivor." –he explained before pausing for a second- "What you heard her call me... 'amin' it means master, teacher... it's a term we use to refer to our instructors. There's no underlying tone or hidden meanings there, Bellamy, let your mind rest. Sam doesn't feel about me the way she feels about you."

It surprised me how easy he had read me. Maybe that's why he managed to get so close to Sam so soon. However, Octavia had read me too so maybe I was just doing a poor job at hiding how infuriating it was knowing I was losing Sam; but that had been my fault, Sheda had nothing to do with it. I couldn't blame him for having feelings towards Sam, even if he hadn't confirmed them to me, I knew.

-    "I'm glad she has you." –I finally spoke.

-    "And I hope you'll fix your issues."

-    "Me too."

**\--------------**

**SAM'S POV**

I could see the top of the wall that surrounded Arkadia now. Finally. I was the first to get there because the rest had gone to the cave to pick up Miller, Bryan, and Harper. I chose to keep going towards Arkadia, full intention of getting there and looking for Lincoln's body before Octavia got here. However, before I could even approach the main gate, which was open, Sheda's voice stopped me.

-    "Sam, wait!" –I turned to face them and I saw him making very stressed hand movements for me to stop from the open hatch of the Rover- "Get back, I'll take Selene now."

-    "What? Why?" –I approached them as they got out of the Rover.

-    "Harper and the guys didn't answer." –Bellamy looked up at me- "We don't know what's in there, it could be dangerous."

-    "Have you met me?"

-    "Come on, Sam, I don't wanna fight." –he offered me a rifle- "Please."

I sighed as I got down from Selene and took Bellamy's rifle.

-    "You remember how to use those?" –Sheda asked me unsure, slightly entertained I dare say.

-    "I was very well trained, how dare you doubt me."

I mocked him and turned around to walk the last meters to Arkadia.

-    "Everyone, stay sharp." –Bellamy was quick to command- "Two at each side of the Rover, the rest inside. Sheda, stay back with Selene."

I moved to the left side of the Rover with Octavia while Bellamy and Clarke remained on the right one. Monty was now driving slowly as Jasper got up on the hatch with another rifle.

-    "We left two days ago, why haven't they fixed the gate?" –I heard Clarke speak from the other side.

-    "Maybe because there's no one here to fix it." –Jasper was quick to answer and I had to hold back a laugh.

-    "It's like a ghost town." –Octavia spoke beside me.

-    "Well, Kane will be happy I didn't kill anyone else." –I shrugged my shoulders- "Every cloud has a silver lining."

-    "Miller, where the hell are you?" –Bellamy spoke, I assumed, on his walkie- "I don't like this."

-    "Maybe they got chipped." –Jasper commented.

-    "If they got chipped..." –Bellamy argued- "...they'd have been waiting for us at the cave."

-    "This makes no sense." –I spoke- "If they weren't chipped and the grounders didn't take them... who the fuck's left that wants us dead?"

-    "Maybe they saw the open gate..." –Jasper tried again- "...and they went in for Lincoln's book."

-    "Maybe you should stop saying maybe." –Octavia answered him.

-    "J, I love your optimism but if that's true... why aren't they answering?"

-    "It doesn't matter." –Clarke spoke- "If they are chipped, A.L.I.E. already knows we're coming."

We kept moving inside until Monty stopped the Rover just outside the inside doors. Octavia stopped dead on her tracks next to me and I had to follow her gaze to check what had stunned her that much. A pool of blood.  _Fuck, fuck, fuck, this is what we were trying to avoid, Sam! Great fucking job._ Before I could say anything out loud, she spoke.

-    "Let's just get his book and get the hell outta here."

I simply squeezed her upper arm and she nodded as everyone else got down from the Rover and Sheda joined us.

-    "Where's everyone?" –Sheda soon came next to us.

-    "There are not many places A.L.I.E. would want to go, right?" –I turned to face him- "Wait..." –an idea came to mind- "Clarke, hear me out for a second and let me know if I sound insane."

-    "Alright." –she didn't look too convinced.

-    "They're gone and by now we can assume everyone in here was chipped, right?"

-    "Probably... why?"

-    "If you had basically an army and wanted everyone to join your cult... wouldn't it make sense to go to the nearest city now?"

-    "You think she's gone to Polis." –Bellamy stepped beside me.

-    "Well, it makes sense, doesn't it?" –I glanced at him before facing Clarke again- "You were there, who's the new Heda?"

-    "Ontari."

-    "Who's that?" –Sheda questioned- "I knew all the kids and we were all sure Aiden would win."

-    "The Ice Queen had a Nightblood with her: Ontari. She killed all the kids while they slept, but she can't rise as Commander because I took the flame."

-    "So, she's weak now." –I elaborated- "She'd do anything to keep everyone under her command..."

-    "If Jaha gets there and convinces her..." –Clarke knew where I was going as I nodded.

-    "He'll lie to her to get her to take the chip like he did with Raven." –Bellamy ended.

-    "That's what I'd do." –I shrugged my shoulders.

-    "If you're right, we need to get to Luna fast."

Clarke ended and turned around as Monty started the Rover to get inside the ship to start looking for everything we needed.

**\-------------------**

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

Sam stayed behind with Sheda as Bellamy eyed them from a distance, so I decided to wait for Sam, just in case.

-    "Can I borrow Helios?" –Sam asked me.

-    "Yeah, Selene needs a break." –I agreed, nodding.

-    "I need you to go to Polis." –Sam turned to Sheda- "Take Helios."

-    "I'm Trikru and she's Azgeda..." –Sheda spoke knowing what Sam meant- "I don't think that'll work."

-    "You're a General, she'll listen to you. You know I'm right, we have to save our people."

-    "You're Jusheda, she ought to listen to you."

-    "Have you forgotten I'm at war with Azgeda right now? 'Yu jos stot wor au' rings any bells?" [You just started a war]

-    "I remember the burns in your body, yes." –Sheda sighed as we all reminisced that day and my heart clenched in my chest- "What are you going to do then?"

-    "Try to think of something, as per usual."

-    "Come with me."

Sheda approached Sam, leaving little space between them and taking her hands in his; Sam flinched slightly, not enough for Sheda to realize, but I did, and that was enough.

-    "I'll meet you there, I promise."

Sam probably squeezed Sheda's hands as he looked down at them before nodding, even if he didn't look completely sold on the idea of leaving her.

-    "Whatever you do, don't take that chip."

-    "I won't. I promise."

Sam nodded and let go of Sheda's hands, pulling him into a hug. I saw Sheda smiling contempt, resting his head over Sam's shoulder. As she pulled back, he moved closer to her and made her raise her head to look at him.  _Oh, no._  I saw through the corner of my eye Bellamy clenching his jaw and I got ready to step in between them.

-    "I can't..."

Sam's voice was apologetic but she didn't try to move away from him; she sounded sad too. Sheda simply nodded, a small smile on his lips as he moved his hand to the side of her face, looking at Bellamy for a second before focusing his attention back on Sam.

-    "Bellamy?"

-    "I know, I know...."

-    "I understand..." –he caressed her check- "...he's been your first."

-    "He's been all my firsts and I wanted... I hoped he'd be all the ones after that."

-    "I'll see you in Polis." –Sheda spoke after nodding at my sister's words- "Stay alive, Sam."

-    "You too, Sheda." –he smiled, letting go of her but she was quick to grab his arm back- "I'm serious, I can't... I'm not losing you too. I've already lost enough."

-    "Ai hod you in, kika" [I love you, survivor.]

Sam chuckled softly before pulling Sheda down and kissing his cheek; he looked slightly taken aback by her actions but didn't complain, smile still on his face.

-    "Go." –Sam smiled- "Before I think any better of it."

-    "May we meet again, Sam."

-    "Don't you fucking dare saying that." –she pulled him back- "That is exactly what I say when I plan on doing something stupid that could potentially get me killed." –Sam took his chin on her hand- "Promise me."

-    "I promise you, I won't die without seeing you again."

Sheda kissed Sam's forehead before moving towards where Helios was, leaving Selene there; he looked at Sam one last time before looking at me and waving goodbye and I returned the gesture as he left. Sam turned around with a rather sad smile on her face that dropped completely as soon as she saw us; most probably as she realized Bellamy had been there the whole time... listening, watching.

-    "What? It's not like I've just said anything you didn't know by now."

Sam walked past us; I was about to follow her when Bellamy stopped me.

-    "What did he say?" –he asked concerned and I understood what he meant.

-    "He's told her that he loves her." –I answered dryly and the last remains of Bellamy's confident façade dropped, letting me see how broken and almost desperate he was; he could now see I hadn't been lying that time at Mount Weather when I told him not to let Sam go or else she might never come back to him- "And yet, after everything that's happened, after everything you've done and put her through... you still have her heart." –I shook my head- "I can't comprehend why."

I ended and I followed Sam as Jasper joined me.  _Of course, I understand how Sam's feeling, but he doesn't need to know that._ Bellamy was to Sam what Lincoln had been to me and I don't think I could ever let go of that.  _But maybe what Sam needs now is to move on as I will when I finally bury Lincoln and leave this place. Maybe she's right and we both need to leave this place._


	22. I never learn.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They only went back to Arkadia for Lincoln’s book but when have things ever run smoothly for our delinquents?

**BELLAMY'S POV**

I watched Sheda leave Arkadia as Octavia followed Sam towards where the others had previously moved. I was going over my conversation with him on the Rover and his with Sam just now; I had noticed Octavia eyeing them both carefully as well as keeping an eye on me, as if she were getting ready to stop a fight between us but, what she didn't know was that I had understood Sheda's undertone throughout his whole conversation with Sam: he had made sure I could hear them so that, as he had said himself, I could let my mind rest knowing Sam still had feelings for me, which I already knew for Sam had said that herself when she told me she'd rather break her heart than me. If I had taken anything from that conversation was that Sheda was most likely in love with Sam, that Sam still loved me but that she also loved Sheda, just not in the way he hoped and I dreaded because I knew that, if Sam and I hadn't gotten together, she would surely have fallen for Sheda; she still could if she chose to move on from me. I took a deep breath and followed the girls inside the hangar.

-    "... so no, there's no one here." –Jasper was speaking with Sam and O as I made it inside.

-    "Close the door and turn the Rover around." –I looked at Monty- "We may need to get out of here quickly."

Monty nodded and got again on the Rover as the rest of us carefully inspected the inside of the hangar.

-    "It's like they just got up and walked away." –Clarke pointed out as we walked past a table with food still on it.

-    "Well, considering that you don't need any of this mundane stuff in the City of Light, I am not surprised." –Sam quickly added- "I wouldn't even be surprised if they forgot to eat and drink and their bodies simply died." –she scoffed.

-    "Unlikely..." –Sinclair argued- "But still a possibility."

-    "Alright, we're in and out." –I regained everyone's attention- "Pack as much gear as you can into the Rover."

-    "I'll get the map." –Octavia quickly spoke, moving away.

-    "I'll go with her." –Jasper moved after her.

-    "I'll go with you and then I'll go find all the weapons Pike took from me and a couple from the armory..." –she paused for a second- "And there's something else I need to find..."

-    "No one should be alone." –Jasper turned to face her, and he was right.

-    "You don't wanna load gear, huh?"

-    "Not even a little."

-    "Let him be, Sinclair." –Sam smiled pushing Jasper to move in front of her- "You're more packing gear than us looking around."

-    "Jasper's right, you shouldn't go alone." –Raven looked at Sam- "What if..."

-    "Raven, there's no one else here; everyone was chipped and left." –Sam squeezed her arm- "And I can defend myself, that's the only thing I'm good at these days."

And with that, she turned around to leave after Octavia and Jasper.

-    "Is this because of what I said as A.L.I.E.?" –Raven looked at me.

-    "No, it's about me." –I shook my head- "But we can do that later, now we need to find that map, gear up and get the hell out of here."

-    "What's the rush? They aren't coming back."

-    "How do you know?" –Clarke asked her.

-    "Well, I thought we already established they are moving to Polis since A.L.I.E.'s mission is to chip everyone; it wouldn't make sense to return to a place she already took."

-    "It might make sense if there was someone in that place, i.e. you, who could tell us stuff that could end her."

-    "Good point." –Raven agreed and then looked at us- "Let's load gear."

**\--------------**

**SAM'S POV**

I followed Jasper and Octavia around the ship; I wish I could say I had forgotten everything that had happened in this place, but I couldn't. I was worried about O; we were going to the room she had been sharing with Lincoln and it was going to be a reminder of everything they lived and what they had been robbed. As we got there, she opened the door, standing before it for a moment as she let her eyes drink everything in front of her. Jasper turned to look at me; I knew he was worried too and he knew what O was going through, so I was glad he chose to come with us. Octavia finally walked inside the room, her feet carrying her directly towards Lincoln's jacket; she took it and moved it up to her nose, his smell triggering all the emotions I knew she had been trying to avoid feeling. She smashed the jacket on the floor and threw everything that had been on a table to the ground, breaking almost everything she could find.

-    "Hey." –Jasper spoke beside me.

-    "What!" –Octavia's voice was full of rage but both Jasper and I knew it was not meant for us.

-    "Remember when you told me it gets better?"

-    "This is not the same thing, Jasper."

-    "It's okay to fall apart a little, Octavia. You loved him."

-    "A warrior doesn't mourn the dead until the war is over."

And there she was, avoiding feeling again as she started to look around and pull things from an old trunk. I patted Jasper in the back, recognizing his effort.

-    "Can you stay with her? I need to look for something before we leave and I don't want to keep her in here for too long."

-    "Okay." –Jasper nodded- "Be careful."

-    "I will."

I squeezed his shoulder after glancing at O one last time. I knew she'd need time to get through this but that didn't mean we had to stay in this shithole longer than necessary. I started walking around the ship, knowing all too well where I was going. I went first to the Chancellor's office where I was sure Pike had put away a couple of the blades I didn't get back when we escaped the last time, finding them easily for there was nothing locked.  _Weird, but I'll take it._ Then, the hardest part. I moved back to the room areas soon finding the one that I had shared with Bellamy; I felt a quick but sharp pain in the chest as I stood in front of it.  _I don't have time for feelings right now. Sam, focus._  I took a deep breath as I opened the door focusing on just looking for what I had come to find. I moved to the small cabinet in front of me and opened one of the drawers. A bittersweet feeling soon took over my body as I took out the weapon: Lincoln's bow. I let my head fall forward as I felt the tears burning my eyes.

-    "No. Octavia's right." –I quickly composed myself- "A warrior doesn't mourn their dead until the war is over, and I'm not even fucking close to done."

I nodded in agreement to my own words, putting an arm through my bow and picking up the quiver with arrows that Sheda had gifted me.  _I hope he's okay._  I got out of the room, not allowing myself to look around, and making my way back to where I had left Octavia and Jasper.

-    "I'm back, guys."

I announced myself as I was turning over the last corner but receiving no answer.  _Well, maybe they left back to the hangar._  However, something told me to check the room and I didn't like what I saw; there were signs of struggle and a piece of cloth that seemed to have been ripped from someone during it.  _A Grounder? Here? But why?_  There was also some blood in the ground but I couldn't allow myself to panic just yet.  _There's not a lot of blood, so that means they didn't bleed out; there are also no bodies which must mean either the intruder took them somewhere or they managed to escape. Jasper and Octavia better be okay or someone is going to regret the day they were born._  I got out of there, pulling out a blade just in case; I was walking the corridors back towards the hangar when I heard something like a rustle; like something was being dragged around. I put by bow and quiver down next to a wall so that they wouldn't disturb me if I had to kill someone nor if I had to hide quickly. I walked up the end of the corridor, seeing remains of red gas. Probably, something to knock us out.  _Damn, this no Grounder._ As I turned the corner, I saw him; Monty lying unconscious on the floor and I threw all my precautions out of the window.

-    "Monty!" –I ran up to him, kneeling beside him- "What the fuck happened here."

Two hands were suddenly pulling me back, trying to choke me as I struggled against them. As they pulled me up from the floor, I managed to kick them and they let go of me grunting in pain.

-    "You!" –the man looked at me.

-    "Emerson?" –I was startled, to say the least, to see him here- "What the fuck are you doing here."

-    "Oh, you know what I'm here for."

He approached me with a blade in hand and I stumbled back, almost stepping on Monty; a second Emerson took to his advantage managing to cut my side as I turned around to go around Monty.

-    "Give up, Samantha." –he smiled as he saw me pressuring my side, knowing he had gotten to me.

-    "You don't know me very well."

I was ready to run up to him again when he put on a mask and threw a container in front of me.  _Oh, no. I'm not going down that easily._  Emerson probably thought I was going to drop on the ground but instead, I started running back the way I had come from. I expected him to come after me, but he never did.  _The asshole really thinks people die from a superficial wound, doesn't he? Well, he's in for a fucking surprise once I get my hands on him._  I took my bow and quiver on the run, stumbling into a room where I looked for some bandages, finding none.  _Fine. I'll take care of this when I kill that idiot._   _By now I can only assume he has everyone with him and is probably still looking for Clarke since she stood back with Bellamy. Bellamy! Fuck. Alright, calm down. If we were Emerson, where would we take our hostages? He doesn't know this ship that well so he wouldn't risk just using some random room... when we held him prisoner here he only saw the main door, which we can discard; the infirmary, which has two doors and would be hard to defend; and the airlock. That's it! One room with one door at the end of a hallway, you can't be ambushed because you control the place._  At least, it seemed like a good shot and I had nothing to lose.  _I need to be as quiet as possible and I need a gun._ Luckily, the armory wasn't close to the airlock so I wouldn't risk being caught.

**\-------------------**

**CLARKE'S POV**

I had managed to escape from Emerson and made it outside the ship looking for Bellamy who was keeping guard at the front of the camp.

-    "Bellamy!"

-    "Clarke?" –he caught me as I was about to fall to the ground- "What is it? What's going on?"

-    "Emerson." –I managed to say as I caught up my breath- "We have to warn the rest."

Bellamy nodded and we both walked back to the ship, this time, both of us armed.

-    "Where's Monty?" –Bellamy asked me as we got to the corridor in which Emerson Sam ambushed us.

-    "Emerson took him." –I looked at him- "But I don't know why."

-    "Octavia..." –Bellamy took out his walkie- "Can you hear me? Come in."

-    "Jasper and Sam were with her." –I reminded him.

-    "Sam? Jasper?" –he waited but there was no answer- "Guys, say something." –still, no answer- "Sam, come on."

-    "Miller, Harper, Bryan..." –I realized it had been Emerson all this time, not A.L.I.E- "This is all my fault... I let Emerson live..."

-    "What are you talking about?" -Bellamy turned to face me, lowering his walkie with furrowed eyebrows.

-    "In Polis. Roan sent him as a present for me and Sam... I had the chance to kill him but I let him go."

-    "Sam let him go?"

-    "The choice was mine to make; she tried to kill him but Titus stopped her. She was right."

-    "Bellamy?" –Raven's voice came through the radio- "What's wrong?"

-    "Raven, are you okay? Where are you?"

-    "Still in engineering, we're fine."

-    "Raven..." –I took the walkie so that Bellamy could take his rifle again- "Listen to me. Emerson is here. Are the others with you?"

-    "Negative, just Sinclair." –I heard Bellamy sigh in desperation beside me- "Mount Weather Emerson?"

-    "Yes. Okay, lock down the hangar bay, don't let anyone in but us."

Bellamy and I started running towards the hangar to meet them and think of something between the four of us. Once we got there, the door was almost closed but there was still space to get inside. Bellamy went in first calling for them but what we found was not what we wanted: Raven was nowhere to be found and Sinclair was lying on the ground; I kneeled to check his pulse.

-    "We're too late." –Bellamy spoke as I closed Sinclair's eyes.

-    "No, we're not." –I rose from the ground- "If the rest were dead, we'd have found their bodies. He's taken them somewhere, but where?"

-    "They could be anywhere. How does he even know his way around?"

-    "He was here." –he looked at me confused- "When you were in Mount Weather." –and then, it hit me- "The airlock." –I took the walkie from him- "Emerson, I know you're listening; we need to talk."

-    "I don't need to do anything." –Emerson's voice came clear and strong through the walkie- "You should have killed me when you had the chance. Your friend Samantha knew better but why would she go against you, right?"

-    "And now you're here to kill me, is that it?"

-    "Something like that."

-    "Then let my friends go. Do that and you can have me."

-    "You're brave, Clarke, I'll give you that. They are lucky to have a friend like you." –his tone was almost mocking- "Come to the airlock. No weapons." –Emerson ended- "Right now."

-    "Here." –I turned around, handing Bellamy the walkie.

-    "What the hell are you doing?"

-    "Saving them."

-    "He's going to kill you."

-    "Look..." –I took the AI from my pocket- "When it's over, take this to Luna. Raven will know what to do with it. Promise me."

I knew promises were Sam's way of making sure Bellamy would stick to the plan, or at least to make sure he wouldn't do something too stupid; so, I used her words hoping to appeal to his feelings for Sam so that he'd agree to let me save her.

-    "No." –Bellamy shook his head in denial.

-    "Bellamy, Emerson has our friends, all of them including Sam and Octavia."

-    "Don't you think I don't know that?" –he raised his voice and took a deep breath to calm down- "But what makes you think he's just going to let them go like that?"

-    "I don't need you thinking like Sam right now, Bellamy. I need you to take this chip and take it to Luna."

-    "If you're going to take anything from Sam, let it not be that. I'm not getting anyone else killed."

-    "This is my fault and I have to fix it. I'm not letting anyone else die for my mistake, okay?"

-    "Are you through? I don't know what happened between you, Emerson and Sam in Polis but I do know that letting him kill you here today is a stupid plan. And I should know about stupid plans."

-    "You know that's exactly what Sam would do, right?"

-    "Then I'd handcuff her to the Rover."

-    "So what, you have a better plan?"

-    "How about none of us dies today?"

-    "How?"

-    "You distract him and I shoot him, easy."

-    "Fine." –I sighed putting the AI back in my pocket- "But we only have one chance before he kills us all."

-    "I won't miss."

I nodded, hoping this would work or else we were all dead. I made my way to the airlock following Emerson's instructions but closely followed by an armed Bellamy.

-    "I held up my part of the deal." –I spoke as I walked the last couple steps to get to the middle of the airlock's corridor- "Your turn. Let my friends go."

As I stood there, I looked around the airlock; Octavia and Miller were each handcuffed to the opposite walls forced to stand; Monty, Bryan, and Harper were sat next to Miller, also handcuffed; and Raven and Monty were in the same position next to Octavia. All of them were gagged.

-    "Tell Bellamy to show himself first."

-    "I don't know what you're talking abo..."

I couldn't finish my statement; Emerson moved next to Octavia and punched her in the ribs, making her grunt in pain.

**\---------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

-    "No!"

I heard Octavia grunting in pain and I had to come out; I couldn't risk her life like that. As he saw me, Emerson put a knife to Octavia's throat, clearly pleased with himself.

-    "Good. Now take out the chip and throw it down the hall, put the gun on the ground and get inside."

-    "Where's Sam?" –I was quick to ask as I looked around the airlock not seeing her and fearing the worst too.

-    "Do as I say or I slit your sister's throat."

-    "Please..." –Clarke tried to reason with him- "You wanted me; I'll get inside once you let them go."

-    "I was talking to Bellamy." –Emerson smiled and moved the knife, cutting Octavia's upper chest instead.

-    "Okay, okay!" –I pleaded- "Just stop."

-    "Bellamy, don't." –Clarke turned around to look at me.

-    "He'll kill her if I don't." –I shook my head- "I'm sorry, Clarke, I can't."

I followed Emerson's previous orders, leaving my rifle on the floor and getting rid of all my weapons before entering the airlock. Once I was inside, Emerson pointed at a couple handcuffs in between Jasper and Raven.

-    "Those are yours."

I looked at him, at O and then at the pair of handcuffs, realized there was another par on Raven's other side.

-    "Were those for Sam?" –I asked, approaching them.

Emerson limited himself to moving the knife up O's neck and I got the message; so I handcuffed myself to the wall and then, he let go of O, very aggressively.

-    "She put up a fight." –he spoke to me- "I wasn't expecting anything else."

-    "What did you do to her!" –I was quick to scream, I could feel the rage on my face as I struggled with the handcuffs, trying to get rid of them- "Where is she?!"

-    "I guess she got scared and ran away." –Emerson smiled slightly- "Or maybe I actually got her this time. Either way, I'll find her after this and, if she's still alive, I'll kill her."

-    "I'll kill you!"

-    "None of you in in a position to threaten me." –he put a gag on my mouth and then turned to Clarke- "Get on your knees, Clarke." –I turned to look at her as she did as he asked- "Put your hand behind your head."

Emerson moved out of the airlock, closing the door behind him. We're fucked. We're all dead and I don't even know where Sam is.  _I hope she's okay._

**\----------**

**3rd POV**

Emerson has everyone but Clarke now inside the airlock; he closes it behind him as he steps out of it while Clarke watches helplessly at her friends from outside. Emerson walks up to her, grabs her by her hair, pulling her up and making her walk up to the airlock's now closed door as she pleads for the life of her friends.

-    "You murdered 381 people. You took the lives of my children, my brother, my friends..." –he moves back slightly to handcuff Clarke to a vertical pipe next to the airlock's panel- "Did you really think that I would be happy with just one life in return?"

-    "Allow me then to ease your pain."

Samantha is standing at the entrance of the corridor with a gun on her hands. Emerson is quick to turn around, startled by the sudden noise behind him and, as he sees Samantha, he is quick to move Clarke in front of him to avoid getting shot.

-    "I thought I..." –Emerson struggles for a moment to find the words- "I thought you left."

-    "I don't leave my family behind. Now, let Clarke go and open the airlock."

-    "You are in disadvantage here." –he moves a blade to Clarke's neck.

-    "I should have killed you instead of letting Clarke let you go." –Sam scoffed, rolling her eyes- "I never learn, do I?"

-    "Which is why you're going to let that gun down and enter the airlock once I open it again."

-    "What makes you think I'm going to basically commit suicide?"

-    "You won't let me kill Clarke."

-    "You're messing with the wrong girl, Emerson."

-    "A kid, you mean, following her directions all the time..." –he pulls Clarke harder by her hair and she yelps in pain.

-    "I wasn't following Clarke's 'directions' when I followed you inside the Mountain." –Samantha smiles slightly- "Things do work better when I do as I please."

-    "Too bad you're just learning that now." –Emerson tightens his grip on Clarke as he moves his hand towards the airlock panel- "You're going to see your friends die and then I'll kill you and Clarke."

-    "Wouldn't you like that, huh?" -Samantha lowers her gun slightly- "You should have killed me when you had the chance."

She shoots at Emerson's foot who loses balance and falls to the floor pulling Clarke with him, but not before he presses the button that takes the air away from the airlock room. As Emerson raises from the floor, Clarke quickly pushes the button back and the air circulation is reestablished in the room behind them.

-    "I'm going to kill you."

-    "Let's even this out, then." –Samantha throws the gun behind her- "Your move."

As everyone inside the airlock recovers their breathing, they look out to see Emerson moving towards Samantha, who looks almost entertained.

-    "I'm sure I got you." –Emerson yells furiously.

-    "Pain is kind of my default state."

Emerson throws a punch at Samantha's stomach, who easily avoids it as she hits him in the jaw, making him bleed.

-    "That's for touching my sister."

Emerson spits some blood, but he's trained in combat, he won't go down easily.

-    "Throwing that gun away was a stupid move."

-    "A stupid move was not making sure I was dead."

-    "Touché." –Emerson suddenly moves back, hitting Clarke's head against the pipe and pushing the button again- "You don't have much time until they all die."

-    "If you wanted to play serious, you could have just asked."

Emerson can tell he's pushed a trigger but not sure to which extent. Samantha practically runs up to him, slamming his head against the doors. Everyone inside turns to face them as they start to lose consciousness one by one. As Samantha pushes Emerson to the floor, she turns around for a second and makes eye contact with Bellamy as he completely loses consciousness. Emerson has moved to the other side of the corridor, looking for Samantha's gun as she completely forgets about him and moves to the airlocks panel to restore the oxygen; as she's about to press the button, Clarke nudges her in the leg.

-    "Sam, careful!"

Samantha turns around; Emerson is pointing the gun at her but she simply shakes her head and smiles.

-    "You don't think I'd let a perfectly functioning gun for you to use, right?" -she pushes the button, restoring the oxygen in the airlock- "You don't think this kid right here is that stupid, do you?"

As the oxygen is restored, Samantha turns around to a very startled and confused Emerson who pulls the trigger. Clarke yells out of instinct but nothing happens.

-    "I told you not to mess with me."

Samantha takes out a blade and approaches Emerson as he lets go of the gun, trying to find his own knife, realizing all too late it's at Clarke's feet. He tries to move away through the corridors but Samantha quickly grabs him, stabbing him on the back, making him fall forward.

-    "That's for hurting my family."

She pushes him around to make him lay on his back as he tries to fight back, but it's too late: he's hurt and Samantha's enraged; she kneels over him and stabs his leg.

-    "That's for Mount Weather."

She raises from the ground and grabs Emerson by his vest as he grunts in pain, ineffectively trying to stop the bleeding from his leg. She makes him turn around before she presses the button to open the airlock, forcing him to watch everyone inside coming back to their senses as the oxygen hits their organs. She forces him to kneel, pulling his head back by his hair.

-    "Save me a chair in hell." –Samantha places the blade on his neck- "Tell Cage and Queen Nia I say hi."

Emerson tries to speak, but his words get stuck as the blade slashes his neck from side to side and Samantha lets go of him, watching him bleed out on the floor.

-    "Jus drein, jus daun."

She then puts her blade away and moves up to Clarke.

-    "You okay?" –she asks as she checks the small wound on her head that has bleed slightly- "You're gonna need to stop getting hit in the head, princess."

-    "Yeah." –Clarke smiles- "He has the key on his vest." –she points out with her head at the dead body next to her.

Samantha nods and quickly looks for the key, finding two sets and trying them both on Clarke's handcuffs, being the second one the one that works; she hands the other one to Clarke and they both get inside the airlock, checking which key opens whose handcuffs. Samantha moves directly towards Octavia, seeing her bleeding and taking out her gag, trying the keys on her cuffs, which luckily work; Octavia basically gives in at the lack of support and Samantha is quick to hold her still.

-    "O, O, it's me!" –Samantha speaks soothingly- "I got you, it's okay. You know I'd never leave you."

-    "I knew you'd come back."

Octavia smiles lightly, resting her weight on her sister's side as this last one places her arm around her waist to hold her still. Samantha smiles too and moves slightly to the side to find Bellamy's eyes on her; he's still gagged but he doesn't need to speak, his eyes say it all.

-    "Can you sit for a second?"

-    "That'd be a solid yes, please."

Octavia nods as she sits on the ground, gaining her strength back while Samantha moves back to Bellamy and takes the gag out of his mouth, caressing his face as she does, unable to stop herself.

-    "You okay?" –she asks softly as she moves to unlock his handcuffs.

-    "I thought I lost you again." –is everything Bellamy can say.

-    "I'm not made of glass, remember?" –she looks at him, repeating her own words from what seems like years ago now with a smile that drops as she realizes her key doesn't work- "Of course, fine. I get it." –she scoffs annoyed- "Clarke, Bellamy's yours."

-    "Mine's don't work on Harper either."

-    "Here." –Samantha hands her the keys and turns to pick up Octavia- "You finish this."

Bellamy tries to say something to stop her from leaving but is quickly interrupted by Clarke asking him if he's okay and why he gave up so easily. Samantha's now by Octavia's side again, helping her up and moving out of the airlock; as they do so, Bellamy is freed from the cuffs that fall to the floor, the noise immediately calling Samantha's attention; her eyes landing on Bellamy's. They don't say anything, they don't have to. Bellamy feels like he can breathe again knowing that his girls are both alive; he wishes they were on a better place to walk up to them and help them out of that hideous place, but he knows they still have things to work out. He looks at Samantha, his mind is crowded with images of him kissing her and holding her close as he runs his hands through her hair; exactly what he craves to do now as he tells her how much he loves her and how much he wishes he had gone with her to the armory. Samantha's heart skips a beat as she reads Bellamy's eyes like an open book: so much love, fear and yearn are mixed in his dark-brown eyes; she too wishes things were okay between them so that she could hide her face in his chest while she tells him how scared she was when she saw him running out of air. She may be trying to push him away, but that doesn't mean she isn't still head over heels in love with him, just like he is for her. They both have all this bottled up feelings that they won't speak out loud for they know this is not just about them anymore; Octavia plays an important role in both their lives and she needs to heal. Samantha has chosen the younger Blake and both former lovers are okay with that: Octavia needs her more than Bellamy does now. All these things are felt in the second they cross glances and just before Samantha quickly moves her face to look forward, trying to clear her mind, wishing she couldn't read him so easily. She kisses Octavia's forehead as they walk out of there, slowly.

-    "Let's get out of here before I have to kill someone else, alright?"


	23. We honor our dead.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the airlock scare, everyone gets back to work: Sam goes back to her room to pick up a couple things and Bellamy decides he has to confront her before Lincoln’s burial.

**BELLAMY'S POV**

Sam took O out of the airlock and the rest of us followed; as everyone recovered from the shook and got back to what they were doing, Sam took O to medical to check her wound and left her there with Clarke and Jasper while she went back to O's room to look for some clothes. I followed her.

-       "You okay?"

-       "I don't need a babysitter, Bellamy. I'm fine on my own, seriously."

-       "Emerson said he got you."

-       "Yeah, Emerson did a lot of talking and little fighting; that's why he's dead."

-       "I should have gone with you, wherever you were going after leaving O and Jasper in her room. He was right, we should have stayed in groups; maybe I could have been more helpful and..."

-       "Why don't you see it this way..." –she eyed me- "...I killed Emerson and dealt with my rage, we are all alive... well... not all of us." –she clenched her fists at her sides and took a deep breath- "At least I got rid of a bit of the adrenaline I had accumulated over the past weeks, but don't tell that to Sheda, he'll give me another lecture about emotions, breathing techniques and how to learn patience." -she ended moving her hands in the air as if she were brushing the topic away.

-       "Sam..."

-       "Alright." –she stopped in the middle of the corridor- "You want me to talk about what just happened? Fine." –she crossed her arms over her chest- "Yes, I'm glad I killed Emerson, it's not like he did any good to the world anyway. No, I don't regret it. Yes, I'm okay with killing people if they hurt or try hurting us; I'm Jusheda after all."

-       "That's not what I meant."

-       "Enlighten me, but keep moving." –she turned around and started walking again.

-       "I don't think you're okay." –I sighed moving after her.

-       "You're right, I'm not. Haven't been for a while and don't expect to be any time soon but I don't care; there are other things we have to worry about like destroying A.L.I.E. before we all become robots."

 _So stubborn._ We made it to Lincoln and O's old room and Sam moved straight towards the wardrobe not looking around. I stood in the entrance checking the condition of the room: broken things all over the place, Lincoln's clothes had been unfolded and were scattered all around, and there were some tiny spots of blood in the floor. I was going to squat to inspect them when Sam's voice called my attention.

-       "It's Jasper's."

-       "How...?"

-       "There were only two people in this room when I left. O's only bleeding from her chest and when I left she was wearing a jacket. Why would she had taken it off to fight Emerson? She wouldn't, and the only way to get a cut like that is if your enemy is behind you; I know O's way of fighting so that's not even close to a possibility. Jasper, however, has a decent cut on his head. When I left, he was standing on the door; I assume Emerson knocked him out first and then went for O and she fought him hence this mess." –she shook her head- "Maybe if I had stayed a couple more minutes..."

-       "Hey..." –I approached her as she looked at the ground- "... they are both okay. You found us and you got rid of Emerson. We owe you."

-       "You don't owe me anything. This is what family does." –she walked past me, handing me O's clothes- "I'm going to find another t-shirt for me and pick something up. Take this to O."

-       "I'm not leaving you alone."

-       "Bellamy, Emerson is dead. There's legit no one else who'd want us dead now."

-       "I don't care."

-       "You're so annoying." –she rolled her eyes- "Don't slow me down."

I smiled to myself as I walked after her for I didn't know where we were going, although it didn't take me long to realize: our room. The door was open, I assumed she had been there before.  _Maybe this is where she came before_... Sam started opening a couple drawers shattering the peace in the room until she found what she was looking for: alcohol, a lighter, a needle and thread.

-       "What are you doing?" –I walked up to her, leaving the clothes on the table.

-       "Well, Emerson did get me so I need to disinfect the wound and close it." –she looked at me for a second- "I can't go to war with an infected wound."

-       "Why don't you let Clarke do that?"

-       "Because she has to stitch up O and Jasper and I don't intend on staying here any longer than necessary so you can either go back to medical and keep an eye on them or you can stop asking questions."

I knew fairly well what Sam was doing, this wasn't the first time she had stitched herself up in our room; sometimes, when she stayed out with Ion and Sheda training and got back late, she would refuse to wake Abbie up, so I had taken notes on how to do it so that I could help her when she couldn't do it herself.

-       "Lay down, I'll do it." –she raised a doubtful eyebrow at me- "Come on, Sam, let me help you."

-       "Thank you."

She took off her jacket and t-shirt, revealing her upper body and the wound on her side; it wasn't anything major and, considering all the wounds Sam had, this was like a paper cut for her but that didn't stop me from worrying. She did as I asked and lied down on the bed, resting her head on her hands as I kneeled beside her.

-       "If I hurt you, tell me."

-       "You've done this a couple times before, why would it hurt now?"

She chuckled looking at me and I felt the warmth spreading through my chest.

-       "Fine." –I smiled- "Just don't move..." –and seeing the opportunity, I took it- "And don't talk, alright?"

-       "Deal."

I started cleaning her wound, checking Sam's face every once in a while to make sure she was alright for she had lied her face over the pillow and closed her eyes.

-       "I know you don't want to talk about it..." –I started as I began suturing the cut- "...but you can't push me away."

-       "Bellamy, you're like a broken record and..." –she opened her eyes and moved her face to look at me.

-       "We have a deal. I take care of you and you stay quiet." –I spoke with a smile on my face and she scoffed, but moving back to her previous position nonetheless- "Sam, I know you think you're doing what's best for me and that you've made up your mind about it but I just can't... My actions are on me, you had nothing to do with all I messed up. Your demons are not hunting me and I wish I could help you tame them so that they wouldn't haunt you either." –I sighed running my thumb over her skin, the feeling was so familiar yet so foreign- "I need you to know that I know you need time and space both to think and heal and I'll give it all to you; I'll give you everything you want, but that's not going to stop me from feeling this way about you. And I know being apart from you feels wrong and I know... well, I hope that deep down you feel this is wrong too." –I stood silent for a moment finishing the procedure- "Don't give up on yourself... on us, because I never will." –I put a bandage over her now closed wound- "You're good."

I rose from beside her and moved to the cabinet to leave everything back on its place out of habit. I heard Sam raising from the bed and moving to the bathroom, opening the water and splashing it over her face, probably. Then I heard the water closing but nothing else after a couple seconds so I moved to the bathroom's door to check on her: she was resting both her hands at each side of the sink with a towel hanging from one of them, her knuckles almost white from holding too strongly onto it, her head slumping forward and her hair covering her face. I moved beside her, taking the towel and placing my hand over one of hers, trying to ease the tension.

-       "I know you and I had an extremely strong bond but I feel it broke at some point, at least a little and I can't help but feel it was my fault." –she spoke softly before raising her head slightly to look me in the eyes- "I don't want to be away from you but there's so much going on and we both need to heal on our own to be strong for ourselves and then, maybe, we could go back to being a team... back to being stronger together. We aren't good at dealing with emotions and we both need to work on that or else I'm afraid we'll destroy each other."

She moved both her hands from the sink, standing in front of me; her hair was messy and, even if she still looked strong, her eyes were sad and tired, those eyes that were now traveling around my face, as if searching for something that I was hoping she'd find. Before I could react, she moved her hand to my face, caressing my cheek before I felt her lips against my other one; it was just a second, but the burning sensation on my skin was meant to last much longer.

-        "And I need to tame my demons before I lose you again; before I lose myself too this time."

She walked back inside the room, dressing up as I stood there, processing everything that had just happened and the meaning behind all her words; she used to tell me I was much better at words than her, but that was so not true.

-       "We should go back before they think someone else kidnapped us." –she faced me as I blinked a couple times, coming back to reality- "Do you know where Lincoln's body is? We have to burn our dead."

-       "I'll look for him. Go back with O."

Sam nodded, taking the clothes for O as well as something I had failed to notice until now and what she had come to find in the first place: Lincoln's bow. I knew what Lincoln meant to Sam, not only had he seen her as an equally capable warrior but he had loved her like a brother; he had been around her almost since we met him and I knew what that stability meant for Sam and now, he was gone. I knew she was feeling what I'd feel if I lost Octavia and I couldn't even begin to process how my sister was feeling; I had lost Sam, or thought I had lost her, more times than I cared to admit but she had always found her way back.  _I don't know how Octavia is keeping it all together, last time I thought Sam was gone I had spiraled until I found her back but O knows Lincoln isn't coming back for good... she needs closure._  Sam had left now. I left the towel I was still holding on its place before looking around one last time.  _So many memories..._ I left the room, closing the door behind me and walking through the ship's corridors making my way outside to find Lincoln.

**\---------------**

**SAM'S POV**

_Bellamy is right, and he knows I know he is which makes everything worse, or at least harder. Pushing him away is clearly not working, or at least I'm not doing a good job about it but I should be; if my decisions are taking such a toll on him I can't... I just can't do it. I can't destroy the person I love most because I can't control myself. Ugh. This should have been easy: do I love him? Yes. Does he love me? Yes. Then why is everything so fucking hard? Can I forgive and forget? But there's nothing to forgive, at least not on my part; there's a lot to forget but that can't be forgotten: I can't forget how my instinct is always right, I can't forget how my friend bleed out on my arms and I definitively cannot and will not forget how I lost my brother to a fearful dictator. I can't forgive and I can't forget; so what do we do now? I knew I had refused to feel anything for a reason but I didn't this fucked up of a reminder; a simple 'hey, don't fall for your best friend's brother' would have been more than enough. But no, when do I ever listen? I want Bellamy but..._

-       "Sam!" –Clarke quickly approached me as I entered medical without even realizing- "Let me see that wound, I just finished with Jasper and Octavia's cut is also done."

-       "I'm good, it's disinfected and sutured. We can move on."

-       "What?"

I raised my t-shirt for her to check Bellamy's work.

-       "How did you do that on yourself?"

-       "I didn't." –I moved to Octavia, handing her her clothes and she started changing- "Bellamy did, he insisted on escorting me and doing it himself."

-       "He's done a good job."

-       "Just like all the other times." –I smiled at her and she nodded.

-       "We should finish what we were doing and leave."

-       "Couldn't agree more." –I turned to Octavia- "You good?"

-       "It's not as bad as it looks."

-       "It doesn't look that bad, so I'm glad."

We moved outside medical and outside to take care of a couple things before we went back to the hangar to get into the Rover.

\- "What happened with Bellamy?"

\- "He cornered me." -I smiled- "He had a couple things to say."

\- "And?"

\- "He's right. I can't keep pushing him away. I wish I could but it's just..."

\- "Magnetic."

\- "That's a way to put it, sure. But you're my priority right now."

\- "I don't want to be in the middle of you two. I can't stand being around him."

\- "I chose you and that's what we're doing now."

-       "Is that...?" –she asked me ending the topic and moving on from Bellamy.

-       "Yeah." –I knew what she meant- "I'll teach you how to be the best shooter if you want."

-       "Thanks."

She barely mumbled before her gaze went to the ground. I've never wished I could do something as much as I did then.  _She didn't deserve this. Lincoln didn't deserve this._  We got out of the ship and found the rest working already on getting weapons from the outside armory inside as well as checking them for ammunition. Bellamy was nowhere to be found so I assumed he had actually gone to find Lincoln and I was starting to feel uneasy already. I didn't know how O would react. I didn't know how I would react.  _And I don't like not knowing how things are going to go in scenarios like this one._  As I moved back to take a couple rifles I distinguished Bellamy's figure walking back inside the camp and a chill run down my spine. I walked back to stand beside O, squeezing her shoulder; she rose her head to look at me and I pointed to Bellamy with my head.

**\------------**

**3rd POV**

Bellamy walks up to the sisters, slowly, carrying Lincoln's body covered on a white sheet. As he gets to them and everyone surrounds them, he leaves the body on the ground. Octavia immediately drops to her knees while Samantha stays still next to her. Octavia takes a deep breath and discovers her lover's face, bursting instantly into tears as Samantha looks away, clenching her jaw. This time it's different: Octavia completely breaks down as everything finally hits her, she sobs and screams and the pain in her lungs comes out of her mouth hitting everyone on their chests; Samantha, however, stays her ground, impassive but not less hurt than her sister. It's now her time to remain calm for she knows Octavia is going to need her to be strong since she won't be able to. Bellamy looks at them both, he's standing directly next to Samantha as his sister's cries freeze his blood. Octavia looks at Samantha for a second and she doesn't need anything else, dropping instantly to her knees, being imprisoned in a tight hug.

-       "Hey, hey." –Samantha hugs her back- "I got you, I'm here."

-       "I... he..."

-       "I know, O." –she rocks them back and forth as Octavia cries, hiding her face on her chest and hanging onto Samantha's jacket as if her life depended on it- "Let it all out."

They stay like that for a couple minutes, everyone around them feeling their pain. Samantha runs her hand through her sister's hair as she starts to calm down and moves away from her to face her.

-       "You can't leave me." –Octavia's voice is low but carries so much emotion- "Promise me."

-       "I wouldn't dare."

-       "You can't make stupid choices and risk your life. I can't lose you too."

-       "As far as I'm concerned, the only thing I'm fighting for now is you."

-       "No more stupid plans."

-       "No more stupid plans." -Samantha repeats, trying to reassure her sister.

-       "Promise me."

-       "Only stupid plans to save you." –Samantha runs her hand down her sister's cheek- "Ai sistris, ai dula." [My sister, my responsibility.]

-       "Ge smak daun, gyon op nodotaim." [Get knocked down, get back up.]

-       "Exactly." –Samantha raises from the ground, offering her hand to Octavia- "Our fight isn't over but once we're done, we'll leave and we'll heal."

Octavia looks at Lincoln one last time, kissing his forehead before taking her sister's hand and raising from the ground.

-       "We have to burn his body."

-       "Stay with him, I'll get it ready."

Octavia nods and kneels once more next to Lincoln, still processing everything but her heart a little more at peace knowing that, even though she's lost her lover and his brother to the same disease, her sister will stay with her. Samantha moves away, followed by Jasper while the rest go back to work, leaving Octavia a moment alone with Lincoln.

-       "You okay?" –Jasper asks catching up with her.

-       "I haven't lost as much as O has, you should worry more about her."

-       "I worry about both of you."

-       "We'll survive." –Samantha looks at Octavia over her shoulder- "I'll make sure she does."

-       "You just promised her not to do anything stupid."

-       "But I didn't say anything about doing anything reckless, did I?"

-       "You lied to her?"

-       "There's a difference between being reckless and stupid."

-       "Which is..?"

-       "Being reckless means putting myself in danger without thinking of the consequences; being stupid means doing unintelligent stuff."

-       "An example of you being those things?"

-       "Me being reckless was getting outside the dropship when we fought the Grounders not thinking of the possible outcomes like burning to death. Me being stupid was not killing Pike the moment I saw him."

-       "Makes sense to me." –Jasper shrugged his shoulders.

-       "Octavia can't lose you too." –Bellamy catches up with them.

-       "She won't, I promised." –Samantha looks at him for a second- "I'm not dying any time soon."

**\---------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

After we built the structure and placed Lincoln and Sinclair's body on it we stood still, surrounding it as Raven said her goodbyes to Sinclair before moving back. Octavia the moved towards the structure with a stick on fire while Sam placed an arrow in flames on her bow as she spoke.

-       "We honor our dead."

-       "And we'll make this right." –O threw the stick to the bottom of the structure so that it'd start burning- "Yu gonplei ste odon." –she whispered before nodding at Sam.

-       "Mebi oso na hit choda op nodotaim, biga bro." [May we meet again, big brother]

Sam let go of the arrow, hitting the top of the structure just between the two bodies and the fire immediately started burning them as moved back to stand in between Octavia and Raven. She took both her hands and squeezed them as I stared to the flames. I felt eyes on me so I raised my head, finding O's impenetrable gaze on me. I knew she blamed me for this; I did too.

-       "It's time to go." –she quickly spoke, letting go of Sam who moved her face from the fire to look at her- "I'll get the map."

And with that, she started moving back inside the ship, Sam's eyes followed her but she didn't make any move intending to follow her; instead, she turned to Raven and hugged her. I turned around to watch Octavia leave as it started to rain. The rest of us stood there for a couple more minutes until Raven made her move and started walking away with Sam; the rest of us followed inside the hangar. We started to load the Rover when I noticed Raven and Monty slowly walking towards us.

-       "Hey." –I walked up to them- "We're leaving, why aren't you ready?"

-       "We're not going with you." –Raven answered me- "I can barely walk and my shoulder is killing me... but my brain is all kinds of awesome."

-       "She remembers that A.L.I.E. downloaded herself into the Ark mainframe." –Monty explained- "If the code's still there, we might be able to find a back door."

-       "I'm guessing once you connect A.L.I.E. 2 to Luna, we'll need to access A.L.I.E. 1 to take her down." –I nodded in agreement.

-       "Miller."

-       "We'll keep them safe." –he quickly answered.

-       "And I'll keep them safe." –Harper spoke from beside Miller and Bryan as Sma laughed next to Octavia.

-       "How about you?" –I faced Jasper- "It's gonna be dangerous."

-       "You know me well, I'm in."

-       "Okay, let's get moving then."

I turned around to put one final bag inside the Rover as everyone said their goodbyes.

-       "So..." –Jasper started as I turned around, she was talking to Sam- "I assume you'll be joining us."

-       "Me? Joining a dangerous mission?" –Sam smiled at Jasper- "Have you met me?"

-       "It was a rhetorical question."

-       "I know." –she hit him lightly on the upper-arm- "I'm just messing with you, J."

Jasper smiled and got inside the Rover with Octavia as Sam said goodbye to our friends and tossed another bag inside the Rover before moving back slightly.

-       "It'll be better if..." –I started, thinking she'd choose to take Selene.

-       "I know." –she cut me off- "I'll go in the Rover this time, you don't have to tell me twice, boss."

-       "Thank you." –she raised a questioning eyebrow- "For not fighting me back."

-       "I know you don't like losing." –she gave me a soft smile before turning to Harper- "So, since you're in charge now..."

-       "Hey! Who said Harper's in charge?" –Raven scoffed, but not mad as she looked at Sam.

-       "I did." –Sam smiled at her- "But if you want to make sure my horse is safe and healthy, then please do that too while you use that magnificent brain of yours to shut the bitch down." –Raven chuckled at Sam's comment.

-       "We'll take care of her, don't worry."

-       "Thanks, Miller." –Sam patted his back- "At least someone around here knows what's up."

-       "Bye, Sam! Be careful, I want you back in one piece." –Raven laughed hugging her- "I mean it."

-       "What could be out there worse than what we've already gone through."

-       "Don't sell the skin before you've caught the bear."

-       "I wouldn't sell the skin, I'd bring it back for my bedroom."

-       "You always have an answer for everything."

-       "Someone has to."

And with that, Octavia, Jasper and, Sam got inside the back of the Rover leaving me and Clarke on the front for what was going to be a tough mission.

 


	24. We'll be okay.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some trouble awaits our AI team on their journey to find Luna. Murphy meets someone he never thought, nor wished, he’d see again.

**BELLAMY'S POV**

We had been in the Rover for hours now, following the map on Lincoln's journal but without knowing how long it'd take us.

-       "It's been an hour since we passed the airplane wreckage and seeing as we're using a map without any distances, it could be days before we reach Luna's village."

-       "At least we know we're going in the right direction." –I answered Jasper.

-       "Yeah, have a little faith."

-       "We're running out of daylight." –he looked at Sam- "We should stop in the sun and recharge the battery."

-       "What sun?" –Clarke answered and Sam laughed.

-       "It's pouring rain, who knows when we'll see the sun again, J."

-       "We keep going until the battery dies."

-       "We keep going until we get to Luna." –Octavia corrected Clarke.

-       "That's the spirit." –Sam agreed with O- "Now, since we seem to have a lot of time to kill... Clarke, how'd you escape from Polis after Ontari won the conclave? We'll need a way in that's not the main entrance."

-       "Roan showed us a way out but..."

-       "Wait, wait. Roan? As in the King of Azgeda?" –Clarke nodded at her- "Are we allies with them now, what did I miss?"

-       "No. He helped me because Lexa speared his life when they fought; next time he sees a Skaikru, he'll probably kill us."

-       "Note to self: approach Roan from the back." –Sam scoffed.

-       "Sam, Roan is dangerous." –Clarke tried to reason with her- "If he sees you, he'll kill you."

-       "He spared my life once and I have to know why; you best believe I'll get my answer."

-       "We said no stupid plans." –Octavia cut her off.

-       "It's not a stupid plan, it's not even a plan." –I watched Sam turn her face to look at O who was sat in front of her- "I just have a goal so, technically, I'm not doing anything I said I wouldn't do." –Octavia shook her head and went back to looking at Lincoln's map with Jasper- "Now..." –Sam addressed Clarke again- "...you said 'us' and 'but'. What's do you mean with those?"

-       "I went back for the flame and Titus helped me escape through another passage when Ontari went to see him to ascend."

-       "So there's more than one way in? Awesome. And 'us'?"

-       "Murphy was there..."

-       "Murphy is alive!" –Sam yelled, a mix of rage and surprise in her voice- "I thought... I mean, Murphy's alive!" –Sam's voice sounded relieved for a moment- "Wait, and you left him alone in Polis with Azgeda in charge?!"

-       "Titus said he'd take care of him."

-       "Titus better keep him alive or he'll regret the day he named me Commander of Blood." –Sam mumbled threateningly- "If anything happens to Murphy, I'll spill his blood all over Polis."

-       "Ontari won't hurt Murphy."

-       "You've said yourself she didn't have any issues cutting kid's heads off, why would she not kill a Skaikru? Queen Nia had no issues doing it and Roan has threatened to do the same."

-       "He's like her servant or something."

-       "I don't know what's worse." –Sam gulped- "But I wouldn't mind bathing in Nightblood too."

-       "Don't let Luna hear you saying that." –Jasper advised next to her before he addressed all of us- "What makes you think she's going to agree to put an AI in her head?"

-       "Well, I'd personally drown us."

-       "Lincoln said she helps those that are in trouble; she'll help us too."

-       "Yeah, cause if she doesn't we are going to have a problem..."

Sam was talking when I had to step hard on the brake in order not to crush into a fallen tree.

-       "Bellamy!" –Sam scoffed behind me- "You do realize there are no safety belts back here, right?"

-       "There's a fallen tree on the way."

-       "I'm not liking where this is going."

-       "It hasn't been cut this time." –I looked at her through the rearview mirror, knowing what she meant as the rest looked confused at us - "We have to turn around and find another way where..."

I couldn't finish my sentence as I heard the back door of the Rover open and Octavia getting out.

-       "I guess we're going on foot." –Clarke sighed opening her door and getting outside.

-       "Did no one hear me say it could be days?" –Jasper yelled getting out of the Rover.

-       "You know how we could have gone through here without trouble?" –Sam was the only one still inside with me.

-       "Don't say it."

-       "Selene." –she chuckled and got out too.

I shook my head not even bothering to fight the smile finding its way onto my lips as I got down from the Rover too, catching up with her when Octavia suddenly stopped walking.

-       "Stop!" –she commanded- "You hear that?"

-       "Water!" –Clarke answered and they both started running.

-       "Eyes sharp, they could be hostile!" –I yelled at them.

-       "They're not hostile!" –Octavia turned to look at me- "Put the guns down."

-       "If there's another river, don't even think of getting in it!" –Sam yelled at Octavia- "Cause that'd be a really stupid plan!"

Octavia smiled at Sam before turning around and running up the slope in front of us followed by Clarke and Jasper as I looked at the smile on Sam's face.  _Things had been tough back then, but so much easier._

-       "Don't look at me, that's your blood there." –Sam chuckled before running after them.

-       "She's your sister too!" –I yelled at her and she stopped mid-way to look at me and I realized the implications behind what I had just said- "I didn't mean it like that..."

-       "She is my sister." –she smirked at me emphasizing the second word- "Now move before we lose her."

**\-----------------**

**SAM'S POV**

It didn't take Bellamy and I long to catch up with the rest as we run along a river; I would be lying if I said I wasn't slightly concerned there could be something in the water but I was more concerned with finding Luna's village for the sake of our mission and Octavia's mental stability: I knew she was counting on these to keep her mind occupied and I was afraid if something went wrong, she'd collapse. Luckily, it didn't take us long to find the ocean as we all stood there, where the river ended and met with the sea for a couple seconds, drinking in the view.

-       "Where's Luna's village?" –Jasper broke the calm.

-       "You can't take a small win?" –I looked at him as I saw the smile on O's face drop as she took the journal again- "Enjoy the view for a second."

-       "I know you always wanted to go to the ocean but we can't swim."

-       "Then we'll have to learn." –I mocked him.

-       "No..." –Octavia sighed regaining my attention as she closed the journal abruptly and started running- "It can't be..."

-       "O! Wait!"

I started running after her and so did the rest until we got to a small terrain with a couple rock structures built in circle.

-       "This isn't a village, it's just a bunch of rocks."

-       "Jasper, zip it." –I commanded him and he shrugged his shoulders.

-       "She's gone."

-       "Clarke, you aren't helping either."

-       "What do we do now?" –Jasper asked looking around.

-       "We don't give up. If the map brought us here it's because of something, we..."

Octavia screaming caught me mid-sentence as I turned around to see her kneeled on a rock over the water. It broke my heart.

**\----------------------**

**MURPHY'S POV**

I had been imprisoned with a bunch of Grounders that had refused to take the key. The cell's door suddenly opened and the guards took someone screaming inside; I couldn't believe it when I saw him.

-       "What are the odds?" –I almost laughed as the guard left and I turned to look at him.

-       "John Murphy?"

-       "Told you I'd survive."

-       "I didn't believe Samantha when she told me..."

-       "You've seen Sam?" –I faced him as much as I could- "Where is she? Is she okay?"

-       "Not thanks to him." –one of the Grounders spoke before Pike could answer me.

-       "What's that supposed to mean?"

-       "You should have killed me in that battlefield; I won't make the same mistake. –she addressed Pike before looking at me- "He killed 300 of my warriors and tried to execute Samantha..."

-       "What!" –my blood ran cold.

-       "Twice."

-       "You did what?"

I tried to get to him but my chains were too short.  _Twice! Twice! What is that supposed to mean! How can you even execute someone twice! Well, we're talking about Sam here._  I was so focused on trying to get rid of my chains while thinking what could have gone wrong while I was away that I almost missed the woman walking past me; she had managed to break the nail that was keeping her attached to the wall and was moving threateningly with it towards Pike.

-       "You'll take 300 cuts for the 300 warriors you massacred."

-       "Save one for me." –I asked her and she looked at me- "Sam is my friend, she's like family; if he tried to kill her, nothing will make me happier than watching him die."

She nodded and started cutting Pike's body, slowly but surely.  _Why would Pike want to kill Sam?_  I had thought of her on the daily once I left with Jaha, hoping she'd understand but knowing she'd be worried that I had gone without saying goodbye. She had been my only friend for a long time and I wanted her to be okay; I even had told Emori about her and I knew they'd be good friends if they ever got to meet but, considering how well things were going, I was not sure.  _I have to get out of here._

**\-----------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

We were building a fire in the middle of the structures to keep us warm. Octavia was starting the flames by twirling a small branch against another one while Jasper observed her every move. Clarke was standing next to the main structure we built and Sam was sat on a rock, looking at the ocean.

-       "It'll be dark soon..." –Clarke started- "We need to talk about what we're gonna do."

-       "We wait until first light and then we split up and search the shore in both directions."

She finally got the flames to grow and placed the tinder notch with them into the wooded structure with the branches.

-       "Now that's what I call a useful skill." –Sam made her way back- "Now we just need dinner." –Octavia looked up at her and nodded.

-       "Earth skills was helpful after all." –Jasper looked at Sam.

-       "Well, had I been in more than a couple lessons, I'd be able to judge that for myself but, considering I missed all of it and I survived, I'll say it wasn't vital."

-       "Touché."

-       "I agree with Octavia." –I kept the conversation from before going- "Lincoln wouldn't put this spot on the map unless it was important." –I lowered to pick Lincoln's journal.

-       "Don't touch that!"

Octavia slapped my hand away, taking the journal herself. I rose, sighing, my eyes landing on Sam's; she took a deep breath as she looked at Octavia before shaking her head.

-       "Come on, O." –I squatted next to her- "How long."

-       "I don't know. I can't even look at you because every time I do, I see Pike putting that gun to Lincoln's head. I hear the gunshot. I see him fall."

-       "I didn't kill Lincoln."

-       "No." –Octavia rose from the ground- "But he's dead because of you." –she spat, her voice hard and broken, meant to hurt me.

-       "I came to you." –I rose next to her, ready to put the cards on the table- "You didn't take my help; if you had just trusted me, I..."

Octavia shook her head unamused at me and resumed what she was doing, ignoring me. I realized there was nothing I could do and I felt stupid for even trying, so I moved away to walk down the shore.  _I know she's hurting but she doesn't have to push me away like this. I don't deserve it. It's not my fault she didn't trust me enough to help her. Maybe Lincoln..._

-       "Hey." –I heard Clarke's voice behind me- "You..."

-       "Let me guess." –I turned to face her- "Wanheda, the peacemaker, is here to fix things."

-       "Bellamy, I..."

-       "There's nothing you can do, Clarke. This is between us."

-       "I came to see if you're okay."

-       "I don't need your help."

-       "Sam was right." –she let out an almost entertained sigh.

-       "Leave Sam out of this."

-       "She said you wouldn't listen, that you needed to calm down." –I didn't answer- "I just wanted to let you know we've found something that may help us contact Luna, it's a type of leaf that turns the fire green when you throw it in."

-       "Good."

Seeing I had no intentions of saying anything else, she left and I started walking down the shore again to calm my thoughts; I did so until it was dark and the only thing you could see was the fire the rest were surrounding and the moon. I faced the ocean and crossed my arms, waiting, but not sure for what.

-       "Talking really hasn't been your strongest suit lately, has it?"

I heard Sam's voice before I even realized she was there.

-       "Did Clarke send you?"

-       "Oh, yeah, definitively." –she scoffed, sarcasm dripping from her lips- "How'd you know?"

Sam chuckled standing next to me and turning to look towards the water. We remained like that, in silence, for a couple minutes; I knew she wouldn't force me to talk same way I knew she wasn't going to leave me alone. Her presence was comforting, even if she wasn't doing anything special; that was the effect she had on me.

-       "Sam..." –I finally sighed looking at where Octavia was- "I've lost her."

-       "No, you haven't."

-       "But..." –I looked at her.

-       "She needs time." –she turned to face me as she cut me off- "You didn't kill Lincoln and she knows that. Sure, you have blood on your hands but so do all of us."

-       "Some of that blood is Lincoln's, I put Pike in charge and..."

-       "Don't do that to yourself. You made a mistake, sure, but you didn't want anyone to die. It's not your fault Pike is scared of everyone that stands up to him. Wanna blame someone? Blame him."

-       "I should have listened to you."

-       "Then listen to me now, alright? O will come around but she's probably going to need some time away from Arkadia, there're too many memories there. I'm sure you understand" -I nodded- "She'll forgive you and she'll forgive me too." –she laughed.

-       "For what?"

-       "Oh, you don't think I came over here with her blessing, right?"

-       "I don't want to come in between you two, Sam, if..."

-       "You can't. No one can and that's a fact." –she smiled- "I'm not worried about O breaking my nose for coming to check on you, I'm more worried about you and whether you'll be able to forgive yourself."

-       "Forgiveness is hard." –a tear fell down my face.

-        "I know..." –she moved her hand to my face, wiping the tear away but she left her hand there, stroking my cheek- "I told you we have to work on dealing with emotions, and forgiveness and guilt are the ones you need to work on the most."

-       "I don't deserve you."

\- "Remember the night you came back from your day-trip with Clarke and you opened up to me?"

-       "I do." –I smiled a bit- "I'm so glad I did."

-       "Then we both know what will make you feel better." –she rose her arms to my neck, pulling me down and hugging me.

-       "Sam..."

-       "Stop complaining and wrap your stupid arms around me. I know you miss this as much as I do, so do us both a favor before I think any better of it."

She didn't have to tell me twice; I held her as tightly as I could to my chest, burying my face on her neck as she did the same. It felt good... so good, so familiar; her body fitted with mine like two pieces of a puzzle. I didn't want to let go of her, I didn't want to let her go.

-       "I love you." –I whispered, it had been too long since I had said it out loud- "And I'm sorry for everything I've put you through and I know you've said you don't have to forgive me for anything but I hope you can forgive me for thinking I could push you away to keep you safe."

-       "If you're trying to destroy my amazing argument about why I'm pushing you away, it's not going to work." –she moved back to look at me- "I already know it's stupid. I've been going through everything you've told me lately and I've realized you're right or whatever..." –her voice had gone quieter until it became a whisper as she finally admitted what I already knew.

-       "I just don't want to lose you."

-       "You're not losing me, I just don't want us to end up like my parents." –she sighed- "My mother was so worried about my father, she forgot to take care of herself and look how they ended; I don't want you losing yourself again because I lack respect for death."

-       "It would do me some good if you weren't so impulsive but I love that about you too. I don't want you to change just because I'm not strong enough for you."

-       "Bellamy." –her head immediately shot up- "What A.L.I.E. said was not true; you're so fucking strong both physically and mentally, I know it because I've seen it. You just need to remember not to bottle up your feelings so that you won't explode."

-       "I'll work on that while you're away." –I pulled her back to me and she rested her head under my chin.

-       "I know you don't want me to leave but I need to be away from everything, I need to mourn and I'm not sure I can do that back in Arkadia. I've lost enough to last me a decade and seeing everyone going back to their lives as if nothing had happened? I can't." –she moved her hands inside my jacket, hugging my torso- "And, what's more important, if O leaves, I have to go with her; I can't leave her alone now."

-       "I wouldn't trust anyone else to take care of our sister." –I kissed her head.

-       "I love her so much, I know she'll get through this. She has to." –she let go of me- "I know I told you a long time ago you were my first choice but O needs me more than you do now. I'm sorry I'm breaking my promise..." –she stared at her feet.

-       "Hey, Sam. It's okay." –I took her chin on my hand- "I have an idea of what she's going through and I know she's going to need someone to be there for her; I know that's not going to be me but knowing it's you makes me feel better."

-       "We'll come back." –she smiled.

-       "And I'll be waiting for you both." –I pulled her against me again- "But all this reminds me..."

-       "Don't say it."

-        "Clarke."

-       "I so don't want to talk about that now." –she sighed as she rested her forehead on my chest- "I had completely forgotten about it."

-       "We both know that's not true; if it were, you wouldn't have reacted the way you did when you realized your keys couldn't open my cuffs back in the airlock. You can't keep pushing this conversation."

-       "Have you met me?" –she scoffed- "I know why I'm avoiding it."

-       "We have to deal with this, Sam."

-       "Don't ruin this, alright?" –she moved her face to the side, resting now her cheek on my chest so that she could look towards the ocean- "But I just wanna say that if, while I'm gone, you find yourself moving on, don't feel bad about it, please. Don't wait for me. Move on. Your happiness is..."

-       "Sam, you aren't just a stop in my life that I can move on from." –I made her face me- "You're, and always have been, my final destination; you're the one for me." –a tear fell now down her face and I took it with my thumb- "I love you."

-       "Stop, I don't want to cry." –she moved her hands from my body and rubbed her eyes- "You're ruining my façade; the Commander of Blood doesn't cry."

-       "You don't have to pretend around me, love. I know you better than I know myself; Jusheda is not all you are."

-       "I'm not letting you end your sweet speech with a kiss."

-       "I can wait another 18 years to feel your lips against mine."

-       "Ugh, don't get all cheesy with me now." –she rolled her eyes at me making me laugh.

-       "Why? You can't resist it?"

-       "There are a lot of things about you that are tempting..." –she rose an eyebrow looking me up and down and it all felt so familiar- "...but your corny, lame flirting like the one you've just showcased isn't one of them."

-       "You don't like my flirting?"

-       "I'm just saying it was better when you didn't know I was in love with you."

-       "Was?" –I furrowed my eyebrows.

-       "Oh, excuse me for using proper grammar. The present tense didn't quite fit there."

-       "So, does that mean...?" –I smirked and she shook her head with a smile.

-       "God, Blake, you were so much better at this before."

-       "I don't need you to say it out loud, I just need some reassurance."

Instead of answering me, she pulled me closer by my jacket and hugged me, tightly wrapping her arms around my middle as I sighed contempt and closed my eyes, enjoying having moments like this back with the person I loved most. I knew we both had a lot to work on but I was sure we'd get through it because it was clear that we belonged together; fighting it was stupid as we had both come to realize but I had to learn that Sam was always going to be reckless and impulsive and that her choices were hers and that I couldn't stop her; I also had to learn to allow myself to feel in order to forgive myself and move on. Sam knew she had to learn to control her impulses and measure the consequences as well as to appreciate her own life a little more and put herself first sometimes. However long it took, I knew we'd find our way back to each other just like all the other times.

-       "I love you."

Sam kissed my neck as her words hit my ears. It had been so long since she had said it out loud that, even if I knew she still felt that way, hearing it was a relief. I tightened my grip around her and was about to pick her up from the floor when someone pulled us down. I opened my eyes, trying to roll over to protect Sam from whatever was happening, but failing as someone pushed us to our sides to break us apart; Sam fought back kicking the intruders and so did I, but they were at least 6 and we were on the ground, completely taken by surprise with arrows pointing at us. We couldn't scream for the others to run as we both got our mouths covered. I could only see Sam from the corner of my eye as they gaged us and tied our hands.

**\---------------**

**SAM'S POV**

_See? This is what happens when I let my guard down. They could have killed Bellamy because I gave in!_ They pushed us towards where the others were now surrounded by their people. I could only assume they were part of Luna's clan but they were not how I expected them to be.  _This is not what I expect when someone tells me they are not hostile._ Once we got there and they pushed us on our knees, Octavia looked at me with a worried face, very different than the one she had given me when I chose to go after Bellamy; I knew she was mad at him but he deserved to feel safe too.

-       "Chon yu bilaik? Hakom yu don flag raun?" [Who are you? Why did you signal?]

-       "Ai laik Oktavia kom Skaikru en ai gaf gouthru klir." [I'm Octavia of Skaikru and I seek safe passage.]

-       "Skaikru, bringers of death..." –the man spoke looking at his companions and I couldn't stop myself from rolling my eyes- "Why should we give you safe passage?"

-       "Lincoln." –Octavia was clear and, as she dropped his name, the Grounders looked at each other, recognizing the name and probably now more willing to listen- "He sent us."

-       " _Ban emo gaga we, en lus 'mo meika au." [Remove their gags and free their hands.]_

Two of them moved to Bellamy and me, setting us free; my first instinct was checking on him and he nodded, letting me know he was okay as he placed his hands on my face, making sure I was okay too.

-       "What's going on?" –he asked Octavia.

-       "I don't know."

The leader looked at us before moving towards Octavia, handing her a small vial with a green liquid in it.

-       "What's that?" –Clarke was quick to ask.

-       "Safe passage." –the Grounder answered her as he moved around, handing each of us a little bottle.

-       "What does it do?" –Jasper asked with a funny concerned voice.

The Grounder didn't answer him as he handed him the last vial. I looked at Octavia who had that look on her face and I knew what she was going to do but I wasn't going to risk it. I shook my head at her slightly and she raised an eyebrow at me; I opened my bottle and drank the liquid.  _Of course, I was going to be the first to test it._

-       "Sam, no." –Bellamy tried to stop me but I pushed him away.

-       "Better me first than O."

-       "I trust Lincoln." –Octavia looked at me and drank it too.

-       "Wait, no!" –Clarke tried to stop her now, failing too.

-       "If only they drink, only they come." –the leader looked at the rest as I walked up to Octavia.

-       "See you on the other side." –Jasper rose his tiny bottle and drank it too.

-       "Wuo..." –I felt my head going dizzy.

-       "Sam...?"

I held onto Octavia but my knees gave in and I fell to the floor, Octavia trying to hold me still as I felt the darkness devouring me.


	25. Luna.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Murphy is in the cell with Pike, Sam tries to figure Luna out.

**MURPHY'S POV**

Being in that cell had given me a lot of time to think.  _They key to survival is to keep fighting; the moment you give up, you're dead._  Pike's words from the first day of Earth skills resonated in my mind as well as the first time I saw Sam. I laughed.  _I still remember the look on Pike's face when he was beating me up and Sam stood up against him, smashing that chair on his back: priceless._ She didn't remember me when she saw me on the ground so I had acted as if nothing had happened.  _To be fair she only came to class like three times and it was clear she wasn't there to make friends._ There was something dark about her that the adults decided to keep from the rest of us after she spoke back to Pike and everything made sense when they tried to hang me: she was a murderer. But she wasn't the only one, there was another guy down with us that was a murderer too.  _It also probably had to do with the fact that she had nothing to lose..._   _I'll die trying._ That's what she had answered Pike when he told her she wasn't strong enough to fight him on her own.  _We had to fight back together, we have to do that now._  I hated to admit it, but we needed Pike to get out of there. We could get rid of him later.

\- "Hey!" –I turned to face the woman who had kept on cutting Pike's body.

\- "What!"

\- "Listen, I know you're mad and you want to kill him, I do too, but we need him to get out of here. He's strong." –she cut him again- "Hey, listen to me! Our real enemy right now is out there. Jaha has an army of chipped soldiers who don't feel any pain, which means they're not gonna stop until all of us either join them or die."

\- "Don't waste your breath, kid." –Pike breathed out.

\- "Yu gonplei ste udon."

The woman moved the weapon to cut Pike's neck but another Grounder shouting made her stop; I didn't know what she was saying but she stopped.

\- "Ask yourself this, do you want your revenge or do you want your people to live?"

\- "Both." –she turned to face me- "I'll get my revenge." –she moved away from Pike- "Just not today."

She moved back to her place as the rest of the Grounders looked at her. I turned around to sit back on my place realizing Pike was looking at me with a self-satisfied smile on his face.

\- "Go float yourself. Everything I've learned, I learned on the Ground."

**\---------------------**

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

I woke up not really knowing what had happened after I passed out next to Sam on the beach.

\- "Everyone okay?" –Sam's voice filled my ears as I slowly opened my eyes.

\- "Where are we?" –I heard Clarke's voice behind Sam.

\- "My guns are gone." –Bellamy spoke and I immediately reached for my sword, not finding it.

\- "They took all our weapons." –Jasper spoke as he rose from the floor.

\- "If I don't get my bow back, someone is going to regret the day they..."

Sam was speaking when a door opened on the other side of the cage we were in; we all looked at each other, immediately raising from the ground as someone walked inside. It was difficult to see anything because there was a lot of light coming from the outside but the person finally reached us.

\- "Luna." –I breathed out as I saw her.

\- "Where's Lincoln?" –she asked looking around and not finding him with us.

\- "Lincoln's dead." –I answered as calmly as I could as Sam squeezed my shoulder.

Luna closed her eyes for a moment, digesting the hard statement before Clarke spoke.

\- "Lincoln said you'd help us."

\- "Did he?" –Luna looked unimpressed, almost stoic.

\- "Luna, you are the last of your kind: the last Nightblood."

\- "So Lexa's dead as well."

\- "Her spirit has chosen you to become the next Commander. Titus entrusted me with the Flame to give it to you."

\- "Then he should have told you that I left my conclave swearing to never kill again."

\- "You don't have to kill." –Clarke argued quickly as Sam sifted her weight on her feet- "To lead is your birthright, how to lead is your choice." –she approached Luna, taking the AI out of its box- "Here."

\- "I recognize the sacred symbol..." –Luna looked at it- "But what is that?"

\- "This is the Flame. It holds the spirits of the Commanders, of Lexa. Will you take it and become the next Commander?"

\- "No."

Luna closed Clarke's hand with the Flame on it and turned around, leaving us there. We looked at each other.

**\---------------**

**SAM'S POV**

\- "Oh, now, this is so incredibly helpful." - I spoke as I watched Luna move away.

I completely understood why she wouldn't want to become Commander.  _I mean, leading all those people just because her blood happens to be black, it's quite stupid if you asked me. Besides, having to deal with the 12 clans? That seems like a job I wouldn't take, honestly, who'd want such responsibility?_ But this was now more than just becoming Heda, it was about shutting down A.L.I.E. and, as far as I was concerned, Luna could help us with the crazy AI and then go back to this life and forget all about being Heda. I followed her with the full intention of telling her that.

\- "Luna, wait, we need your..." –as I stepped foot outside the cage I realized we were not on land anymore- "Well, I didn't realize Floukru lived literally on the middle of the ocean, now that has to be some poetic, ironic shit right there."

**\---------------------**

**MURPHY'S POV**

The Grounders had been talking among themselves for a couple minutes, not that I cared not knowing what they were saying but, when their leader decided to use English again, I was happy to interfere.

\- "Running is not a plan."

\- "It's not running, it's surviving." –I clarified for her.

\- "For how long?" –her voice was hard as she kept trying to free one of the other Grounders- "This threat will find us all eventually."

\- "The boy is right." –Pike decided to pitch in- "We regroup and come back stronger, it's a legitimate battle strategy."

\- "I have a better one: kill their leader, Jaha." –she argued.

\- "Now, that's a strategy I could support." –I made myself comfortable on the ground- "Unfortunately, he's not their leader, though. He's being controlled just like everyone else..."

_Just like Emori, but why would she have taken the chip... what could have pushed her to do such a thing? I should have warned her, I could have..._

\- "What?" –Pike was quick to ask as soon as I stopped talking.

\- "Nothing." –I looked at him- "Never mind, just forget it."

\- "John, this isn't a time for..."

The sound of someone coming down the stairs towards the cells made him go quiet just as the Grounder's leader went back to her place on the wall, placing the nail in its hole just in time as two chipped Grounders opened the cell's door and walked inside.

\- "Who's ready to take the key?"

Everyone inside remained silent, keeping their heads down and waiting for them to leave, just like all the times before.

\- "None of us is ever gonna take a key."

Pike spoke, gaining the attention of both men; one of them approached him and eyed him upside down before turning to his side as if someone were there talking to him: A.L.I.E. Soon enough, the man that stood on the door put up his rifle and started looking around, pointing it at us while the other started checking everyone's chains.  _They figured it out and they're going to find her._  I tried not to look suspicious as I eyed the guy moving towards her after checking the people beside her, but she was ready; as soon as he got close to her, she turned around and stabbed him in the head with the nail, taking the knife he was carrying on his belt and throwing it to the other man's chest, killing them both.  _Nice._

\- "Come on." –I was quick to raise from the floor- "Grab the keys. She's gonna send for reinforcements."

\- "You said Jaha was controlled." –she walked up to me, grabbing me by my shirt instead of doing as I asked- "Tell me what you know."

\- "The smart play here is going for the tunnels while we still can and before we're overrun by A.L.I.E.'s groupies." –I urged her, wanting to get out of there as soon as possible.

\- "If you have information that can help us..." –Pike spoke as one of the Grounders set me free and moved to free him too.

\- "We don't have time for this." –the leader cut him off- "Talk!" –she moved the nail to my neck.

\- "Jaha's backpack."

\- "What about it?" –Pike asked as he checked the dead men for weapons.

\- "All right, it runs the AI." –I explained, giving up- "If we can destroy it, I'm pretty sure we can destroy her."

\- "I know where it is." –the woman put the nail down- "I saw them move it into the temple before I was captured."

\- "They'll expect us to run." –Pike pointed out- "We can use that. The AI will follow those who do while we go for the pack."

\- "We?"

\- "I can't do this alone." –Pike argued- "Do you wanna save your people or not?"

She was quick to give orders to the rest of the Grounders who started moving out of the cell.

\- "What are you waiting for?" –Pike asked me.

\- "The bad guys are following them, right? I may as well take my chances with you two."

\- "Your father would be proud."

\- "So how do we do it?" –the woman asked as I digested Pike's words.

\- "Carefully."

**\---------------**

**SAM'S POV**

We had been moved inside lead by Luna's people as she disappeared somewhere. Clarke thought she might have gone to her quarters to think things through, but I wasn't so sure. I was starting to get frustrated listening to someone rambling about who knows what when Luna came back.  _Finally._

\- "She's here." –Bellamy was the first to raise- "Maybe she's changed her mind."

\- "The boats return at nightfall." – _well, she clearly didn't_ \- "Then you leave forever."

\- "Luna, let us explain."

\- "I said no."

\- "No, you need to hear this." –Bellamy tried to get to her but a guard stopped him, pushing him away from Luna but she turned to face him, allowing him to continue- "There's something out there that's going to destroy us all."

\- "Whatever it is, it can't reach us here." –she ended and started walking away from us followed by her guard, but I wasn't done.

\- "What makes you think they can't?" –I followed her and the guard pushed me away but that wasn't going to stop me- "You all got here somehow. We got here. For all we know, she could be here already and..."

\- "Sam..."

\- "No, Clarke. Luna..." –I looked at Luna again but she spoke first.

\- "You only know death. This is a place for those who're done fighting, you don't belong here."

\- "I know survival." –I corrected her- "Of course I don't belong here, I don't walk away from trouble, I run straight into it."

\- "Then you'll die."

\- "Then I'll go down fighting."

She nodded and kept walking; I watched her go and sit down with Octavia, handing her Lincoln's diary.  _Maybe she'll listen to her._

\- "That is not going to help us." –Clarke whispered beside me.

\- "What isn't?" – I turned around to face her completely.

\- "Your discourse."

\- "You haven't heard me giving a discourse, princess." –I moved back to look at Luna, crossing my arms over my chest- "I had to know where she stood exactly."

\- "What do you mean?"

\- "She's not going to help us, just watch her: they live in the middle of the ocean, with no weapons and wary of everyone that try to reach them, they are done fighting." –I sighed- "Which, I have to say, is stupid knowing Jaha and adding that he has A.L.I.E... I just hope they really won't reach them here because it's going to be a massacre."

The person talking had just finished and everyone around us started applauding her. I looked around to check where Jasper had left, finding him talking with one of the girls on the other side of the room. I smiled to myself.  _Maybe he does belong here, he deserves a break from the outside world._  As Luna left Octavia alone and the guards followed her, the three of us sat back down next to her.

\- "Jasper's actually smiling." –Bellamy pointed out as Clarke and Octavia turned around to see what I already knew, slightly surprised.

\- "He deserves to be happy, though I'd miss him if he chose to stay."

\- "You could visit." –Octavia looked at me.

\- "You can't honestly think Luna is going to let me step foot in here again. Any of us really; once we leave, we're done with these people for good."

\- "But we can't just leave." –Clarke argued.

\- "It's not like we have much of a choice."

\- "Maybe we do."

\- "What are you talking about?" –Bellamy asked for all of us.

\- "I'm talking about putting the AI into her head without asking."

\- "No way, Clarke." –Octavia quickly whispered beside me.

\- "I like this situation as much as you do but that is wrong." –I agreed with O- "Even for us."

\- "You think I don't know that?"

\- "Clarke..." –Bellamy tried to reason with her- "...we don't have to do this, we can fight; we go back to Arkadia and we arm up."

\- "Fight who? It's an army of our own people. I don't like this plan any more than you do but if Raven's right, then the code on this thing could stop A.L.I.E."

\- "There has to be another way." –I mumbled, trying to think of something before Clarke did something that got us all into more trouble.

\- "Give me a better idea."

\- "We'll stay here." –Bellamy spoke seeing no one else would, finally agreeing with her- "It's the only way they'll leave you alone with her."

\- "Oh, no, I'm not." –I rose from beside them- "I won't be part of this shit."

\- "Sam..."

\- "No. We can't just force someone into doing what we want, it's not like 'hey, take a bite of this, you'll love it'. No, we are forcing her into a life she doesn't want. I can't do that." –I maintained- "I won't do it."

\- "She's right, even A.L.I.E. gives people a choice." –Octavia backed me up.

\- "We gave Luna a choice." –Bellamy looked at us.

\- "And she said no." –I eyed him before looking at Clarke- "Are you entirely sure we can't take it?"

\- "If you aren't a Nightblood, it kills you." –Clarke rose in front of me- "I have to do it."

\- "Do whatever you have to do but don't ask for my help once she manages to avoid your plan which, by the way, is stupid and puts us all in danger."

\- "How would she know?"

\- "You know very well how Nightbloods are trained, not just to kill but to defend themselves. You can't seriously think Luna won't able to do that or get rid of you." –I scoffed turning around- "Just be careful, we have no weapons and I don't want to see any of you dead. I don't want to kill any of these people either."

\- "Where are you going?"

\- "Wherever they let me but here."

**\-----------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

They were both right, we needed Luna but this was not the best way to get her on our side. I hated being in the middle of this, of them, especially having stood by Clarke's side now and not having cleared this with Sam yet. I stayed there with Octavia as Clarke was escorted to talk to Luna and Sam made her way around the place until a guard stopped her.

\- "They are not going to let her out of their sight."

\- "What makes you think she cares?"

Octavia noted as the guard started walking out of there with Sam; I attempted to rise from my place to follow them but Octavia stopped me. I looked at her confused.

\- "She'll be fine, but we have to talk." –she spoke not looking at me so I sat back down next to her- "I still can't look at you, I meant everything I said at the beach but I don't want to stand in between you and Sam; it's not fair for her."

\- "You aren't. I know if she has to choose between us, she's going to pick you and I get why and I'm okay with that. I always have."

\- "She thinks I need protection, doesn't she?" –she scoffed, almost annoyed- "I'm not a kid anymore, I can take care of myself just like she can."

\- "No, O. She knows you need her as a sister, as someone to be there for you."

\- "She's always putting us before herself." –I could see a small smile on my sister's face- "I hope she'll learn to put her feelings first at some point."

\- "She'll start working on that once this is done."

\- "What do you mean?" –she glanced at me for a second before moving her eyes back to her hands.

\- "When she came to check on me at the beach, we both agreed on working on ourselves while she... while you both are gone."

\- "I'm not forcing her to come with me."

\- "I doubt anyone can force Sam into doing anything, O." –I smiled- "I know we'll find our way back to each other, I know being together feels right. I love her."

\- "You're lucky she still feels that way after everything..."

\- "I know, O. I know."


	26. May we not meet again.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Clarke tries to put the Flame on Luna without her knowledge, Sam learns a bit more about Floukru moments before death finds them there too.

**SAM'S POV**

As expected, one of Luna's guards came up to me as he saw me moving away from the crowd.

-       "Where are you going?"

-       "I need air."

-       "You aren't allowed outside alone."

-       "I'm unarmed, what do you think I'm going to do? Break someone's neck with my own hands?" –I scoffed- "I just want to get out."

-       "I'll escort you."

-       "You mean you're keeping an eye on me in case I try anything."

-       "Luna doesn't trust your people."

-       "For what's worth, I don't trust them either. The ones that aren't here I mean, which is why we came looking for your leader's help."

We walked around the place as I managed to convince him to show me around since I wasn't ever coming back.

-       "What would it take for you to welcome someone here?"

-       "You wouldn't fit in here."

-       "I didn't mean me."

-       "We take people from different paths of life: orphans, people fleeing from wars and those who are simply tired of the fight and the kill."

-       "Like Luna."

-       "Yes."

-       "Do you have any contact with the exterior? Apart from your ambassador in Polis?"

-       "No."

-       "So, if someone moved in here with you, that'd mean I wouldn't be able to visit, correct?"

-       "Correct."

I nodded and resumed walking by his side. I was obviously thinking of Jasper.  _From what I've seen, maybe this place is what he needs; there's always something going on in Arkadia and definitively at Polis; I can't ask him to move there with me. We're surrounded by warriors there, Azgeda and it'll probably remind him of Maya every time someone mentions Lexa. Maybe this is his place: somewhere to just live, not fight for survival._

-       "The boat will be here in an hour."

-       "I know. Just make sure I get my bow back, Lincoln made it for me and I can assure you if anything happens to it..."

-       "You knew Lincoln?"

-       "We all did. He taught me all the basis of fighting: to defend myself, to use the bow, swords, tracking..." –I sighed as we got outside- "He was the brother I never had."

-       "He was Luna's friend too."

-       "I know, he told Octavia about her, which is how and why we ended up here."

-       "If you ever get tired of surviving, you know where we are."

-       "I'll probably die before that happens, but thank you."

Another guard came out of the building, towards the platform over the sea where we were, making a sign for the guard with me to join him.

-       "Should I trust you won't try anything while I'm gone?"

-       "I'm locked outside, what am I going to do? Jump into the water? I can't swim."

I knew he found my comment funny but he refused to laugh, simply nodding and leaving back with the other man. I sat down, looking outside the platform and to the horizon.  _I can't lie, the views are better than anything else I've ever seen._

-       "Jusheda."

My head has never shot faster towards a noise in my life.  _No one was supposed to know about that in here._

-       "Luna?" –I looked up at her- "How...?"

-       "One of the latest people to join us recognized you."

-       "Don't worry, I'm leaving with the boat." –I turned my body again to face the water- "I won't bother you any longer."

-       "I don't agree with your ways, but she told me you defended her against Azgeda." –she stood next to me.

-       "Wait, what?"

-       "Clare is here."

-       "Huh." –I smiled to myself, thinking of the lady that had been so nice to me during my days at Polis- "I'm glad she's here, she'll be safe with you. What's out there won't be solved with just with my recklessness."

-       "Ascending..."

-       "Contrary to what seems to be the popular belief around me, I don't force people into doing things. You don't want that shit on your neck? And who would, honestly? It's not just about the flame, you'd have to leave this place and your people to rule over everyone else. That seems like a job I don't want."

-       "Clarke says it's the only way." –Luna's voice was calm, not asking but just reminding me of what had been said earlier.

-       "We all have to die at some point, Luna. Maybe it'll be because of old age, because of a wound, drowning seems like a possibility out here too, or maybe because a psycho robot managed to chip everyone." –I stood up next to her- "I don't blame you. No one should have to be forced into anything, not even for the greater good. You're destined to great things, but not because your blood is black but because you're good; you chose to stop fighting and now you have a community here where you take in those who need you the most. If only this place is meant to survive what's out there, I'll gladly die defending it, not because most people in here can't fight but because that's the right thing to do."

Luna had a serene and peaceful aura around her, it was relaxing and inspiring at the same time. She was a Nightblood, she knew had to fight and defend herself yet she chose not to but, if the occasion arised, I knew she'd be able to fight back; I just hoped she didn't have to.

-       "I'm sorry I couldn't save Lincoln." –I found myself saying.

-       "Did he die well?"

-       "I'm sure you'll agree no death is good; I just wish I could put my blade through his murderer's chest. I know you don't approve violence, but that'd made me feel so much better."

-       " _Kom woda 'so gyon op, gon woda 'so kom daun." [From water we are born, to water we return.]_

-       "That's beautiful, it's more peaceful than what Trikru says."

-       "That's because Trikru's philosophy is not peaceful."

-       "I think you're the only clan out there that would choose peace over war."

We stood there, in silence, until the sun disappeared in the horizon and it was almost time for us to leave.

-       "I'm going to look for your people."

-       "Is Jasper staying?"

-       "He hasn't made his choice known."

-       "I'll miss him if he stays, but I know you'll take care of him for me."

-       "Go look for him while I bring the rest to the container."

-       "My bow?"

-       "On the boat."

-       "Thank you, Luna. I hope we'll never see each other again." –she gave me a questioning look- "Because that'd most probably mean you've been forced to fight and that is not fair."

She nodded and left as I stood out there for a little longer, not that it could be a long time for I needed to look for Jasper if I wanted to have time to say goodbye if he chose to stay.  _This place is better than death, Sam. You could always try to convince someone to let you in to see him._ I talked myself some encouraging words as I made my way inside the building, knowing from when I had been walking around with the guard where Jasper had been with the girl he was talking with.  _If Mount weather was like a labyrinth this place is worse in that sense, if I didn't know any better, I'll probably just get lost in here. It's not like I had been allowed everywhere, which makes it somewhat easier to move around here._  I finally recognized a corridor.  _Maybe it wouldn't have taken me 11 years to get here if anyone was out here, where did everyone go all of a sudden?_  I walked down the hallway and then I saw something I didn't want to see in here: a body with an arrow on the back.  _This is just very bad news._ I run up to them, kneeling beside them as I realized it was the girl Jasper had been with.

-       "Hey." –I took her in my lap- "You're okay, I got you."

-       "They got him."

-       "Jasper?" –she nodded- "Who? Where?"

-       "P level."

-       "That's where they were going?" –she nodded- "And the rest of my..."

-       "In the cage..." –she pointed towards another hallway.

-       "Alright, alright." –I inspected her wound as she closed her eyes- "Stay with me. Stay with me..."

Her head fell to the side slightly and, as I checked her neck, I realized she was no longer with me.

-       " _Kom woda 'so gyon op, gon woda 'so kom daun."_

 _And now what? No weapons and very little directions._ I looked around me.  _I'm sorry._  I took the arrow from the girl's body and stood up.  _I mean, this is better than nothing._   _Let's think for a second. What happened here? They killed on of their own and took Jasper... A.L.I.E. Sometimes I hate being right._ I took a deep breathe before I started running through the hallway the girl had pointed me towards.  _They all better still be alive._

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

Bellamy, Clarke and I had been taken back to the cage that the boat transported and pushed inside while Clarke spoke to Luna.

-       "The flame?"

-       "Remember, Clarke, a path of violence is a choice."

-       "When the choice is fight or die, there's no choice."

-       "Jusheda wouldn't agree with that."

-       "Where is she?"

Bellamy was quick to ask but he got no answer as Clarke was pushed inside the cage by one of the guards as the other attacked Luna and we were locked inside.

-       "They took the flame!" –Clarke screamed.

-       "They're locking us in!" –I informed them both as I tried to get out.

-       "What is this?"

-       "Luna's people are attacking her." –Bellamy reflected- "A.L.I.E. is here."

-       "Sam!" –I yelled, hoping she'd her me- "Sam!"

-       "There was no one else out there, she's not here." –Clarke was quick to pull me back.

-       "Do you know Sam? If she finds out A.L.I.E. is here what do you think she's going to do?"

-       "Hopefully, nothing stupid."

-       "We have to get out of here."

The three of us started to look around, trying to find a broken panel or something that would let us out. I found a flashlight and started inspecting the whole cage while Bellamy tried his best to push the door open by throwing all his bodyweight against it, failing miserably.

-       "How did A.L.I.E. even find this place?"

-       "There was a drone at Niylah's." –Bellamy looked at me and then at Clarke who was sat in front of us- "She must have followed us, looking for the Flame and now she has it."

-       "Great." –I mumbled under my breath- "We are trapped in here and who knows where Jasper and Sam are, what they are doing or what they are doing to them." –I slipped down the cage's wall until I landed on the floor.

-       "Thinking like that is going to get you nowhere."

-       "Excuse me for being worried about our people while you both either sat there staring at nothing or fail to be of any help." –I looked up- "I'm sorry Luna.

I don't know for how long we stood there, sat in that cage unable to do anything for the people out there.

-       "This place was safe until we got here..."

I was playing the flashlight when a clanking noise came from the cage's door and we all immediately rose.

-       "Everything is safer when we're not here, O." –Sam opened the door- "I'm sorry to break it to you."

-       "Sam?" -I ran up to her and hugged her.

-       "Everyone okay?" –she asked as she hugged me back.

-       "Yeah." –I heard Bellamy speak behind me as Sam pulled back.

-       "You're bleeding!" –I yelled as I moved away from her and saw her carrying an arrow and covered in blood- "What did you do?"

-       "It's not mine, O. I was going to look for Jasper when I found the girl he was with, with this..." –she held up the arrow- "...sticking from her back. They have Jasper so we need to move. Now."

-       "You know where they are?" –Clarke asked moving in front of us.

-       "Level P."

And with that Clarke started running and I followed, leaving Sam and Bellamy behind.

**BELLAMY'S POV**

-       "You okay?"

-       "I'm fine, I..." –I didn't let her finish, I hugged her- "...promise." –she chuckled for a moment hugging me back- "Now move. These people need help."

I nodded and followed her after Octavia and Clarke. Sam was quick to move in front of them for she knew where she was going and we all followed her as quietly as possible until we got to the correct level. We soon were able to hear screams and Luna's voice in the distance and Octavia shot running as Sam tried to catch her.

-       "O! Be careful!"

I yelled as she approached the final door and opened with a couple kicks; the door opened, revealing a tied-up girl next to Jasper hanging from his wrists and Luna with a blade on her hand and her guard dying on her arms.

-       "Fuck." –Sam mumbled under her breath looking at Luna- "We're late. I'm late. I should have come here first. I could have..."

-       "Sam..." –I tried to reach her but she moved away.

-       "No. Help the girl." –she spoke as she moved to help Octavia with Jasper.

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

I moved to help Jasper out of the ropes tying him up by the wrists.

-       "I'm fine. They couldn't break me."

Sam walked next to me and helped me with Jasper's other wrist as we managed to set him free.

-       "Shay?" –Jasper asked us, I assumed she was the girl with whose blood Sam was covered.

-       "I tried to help her... I'm sorry, J."

-       "It's what we do."

-       "You got him?" –Sam was quick to ask me as I squeezed Jasper's hand.

-       "Yeah, why?"

-       "I'm going to take Shay. The ritual will begin once Luna..."

She couldn't finish that sentence. Luna was screaming in pain with the man death on her arms, she had to kill him; she, that had avoided the path of war and killing, had to kill on her own because we brought the A.L.I.E. here. Sam fisted her hands and quickly walked out of there, Bellamy tried to follow her but I stopped him.

-       "Not the time."

I knew Sam, I knew she was blaming herself for this, thinking if she had been faster or maybe if she had come here instead of looking for us... Once we finally got out of there, we moved to the main room where we had previously been for the passing ritual. Sam was there, accompanied by the guard that had escorted her once she left for a walk earlier; he had probably seen her wondering alone and he had gone with her for Shay's body since Sam knew where it was. While Luna proceeded with the ritual, Sam walked up next to us, I took her hand and squeezed it and she nodded at me.

-       "Any one of them could be chipped and we'd never know."

-       "If they are, they'll make their move before we put the Flame in Luna."

-       "You wouldn't dare." –Sam fumed beside me- "You tried once and failed..."

-       "This is not the time for moral debates, Sam."

-       "This is precisely the time, Blake."

-       "Quiet, both of you."

Clarke ended Bellamy and Sam's discussion as Luna approached us followed by a woman who offered us some cups with liquid in them, I assumed, for the ceremony.

-       "The ceremony is about to begin."

-       "Luna, wait." –Clarke started- "I'm so sorry, but now you can see what we're facing: an enemy that will do anything to win. She won't stop until she has everyone."

Luna's face was impassible as she listened to Clarke.

-       "People I love died today." –Luna rose her hand with the flame on it and Sam shifted uncomfortably on her place next to me as soon as she saw it- "Needlessly, at my hand; I can't let that happen again."

Luna looked at us for a second, her gaze remaining of Sam a second longer than in the rest of us and I knew Sam was now doubting herself.  _Was Luna going to ascend?_  Luna turned around and made a sign for everyone to raise.

-       "As we prepare to give our brothers and sister to the sea, we honor their lives." –she rose her cup and said something in Trig I didn't quite get.

-       " _Kom woda 'so gyon op, gon woda 'so kom daun." –Sam repeated with everyone else in the room as I looked at her- "It's their version of Yu gonplei ste odon." –she whispered to me before drinking her cup as Luna turned around to face us._

-       "If we're gonna do this, we have to hurry; A.L.I.E. will send reinforcements and we have to find someplace private to perform the ascension."

-       "You believe that to defeat an enemy who will stop at nothing, you must stop at nothing." –Luna sentenced- "How's that different than 'Jus drein, jus daun'?"

-       "It isn't, but that's what we do..." –Sam's cup fell to the floor as she spoke- "...not you. That's what I do."

And with that, Sam fell to the floor just like she had at the beach and I realized all too late what was happening as I too, fell to the ground.

**\----------------------------------------**

I woke up with the smell of the sand on my nose, looking around me finding Bellamy already on his feet with his rifle on hand; Jasper was sat next to me and Clarke was waking up too; Sam was squatted in front of me, picking up her weapons. As Clarke rose, she moved back towards the beach and so did the rest of us.

-       "Now what?" –Bellamy asked.

-       "I don't know." –Clarke looked at him before something else caught her attention- "Sam, where are you going?"

-       "To do what I do best." –Sam looked at us for a second before she started to walk back to where we had come from- "Spill the blood of my enemies."

-       "Sam..." –I ran after her.

-       "Jusheda." –she corrected me- "Sam needs a break."

I stood back as the rest caught up with me and we watched Sam go.

-       "That can't be good." –Jasper pointed out.

-       "It isn't."


	27. No place for feelings in war.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the unsuccessful trip to Luna’s rig, our team encounters an old acquaintance that may just be able to help.

**SAM'S POV**

_If A.L.I.E. only understands violence, that's what she's going to get. I need to get to Polis, check if Sheda and Lila are okay and then it's show time. I don't care who I have to kill, I'm getting rid of this bitch myself._ I got to where the Rover was. _Fuck, I should have brought Selene, now I have to wait for the rest and go wherever they want. I hate depending on someone else._

\- "What's the plan?" –Jasper walked next to me.

\- "Get rid of whoever stands in my way, that bitch is going down."

\- "We need a plan." –Clarke spoke walking next to us followed by the siblings.

\- "We should go back to Arkadia and regroup."

\- "I'm not risking any more lives for..." –I started but then an idea came to mind- "One a second thought, yeah, let's go back."

I walked to the back of the Rover, opening the door and getting inside closely followed by Octavia.

\- "Sam, what are you planning?"

\- "Sam is not planning anything because she is on vacation." –she gave me a questioning look- "What? I just happen to agree with your brother on this one."

\- "That doesn't happen often."

\- "That's a lie, it used to happen a lot."

\- "Used to." –she emphasized- "No stupid plans."

\- "'Stupid plans' is not how I do things."

\- "Don't start now." –she sat next to me- "Shada hasn't been training you for that."

\- "Sheda is not a fan of Jusheda, so he's not going to like anything from now on."

I crossed my arms over my chest, ending the conversation as I closed my eyes and extended my legs to the other side of the Rover, ready to do whatever it took to end this.

**\----------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

_Jusheda... Maybe it's not that bad, Clarke being Wanheda hasn't changed her that much._ I sighed.  _Yeah, Bellamy, but Sam's not Clarke and you should know that by now. But she's agreed to go back to Arkadia without putting up a fight which is so much easier for everyone on the one hand but concerning on the other. I know Sam, I know she's already planning something but she won't even tell Octavia, why would she tell me now?_ We all got in the Rover and I drove for as far as it allowed us to, having to stop once to recharge the battery in the sun. Octavia was sharpening her sword, Jasper was sat on the car's bonnet, Clarke was pacing around and Sam had simply lied down on the grass.

\- "Rover's about ¾'s charged." –I informed them after checking it once again- "We need to pack up, we'll be home soon."

\- "Then what? Run away?"

\- "We're not running away, Clarke; we need to regroup with the others and find another way to defeat..."

\- "There's no other way!" –she raised her voice- "We need to find a Nightblood. We need to unlock the flame, it's the only way to stop A.L.I.E."

\- "What do you expect us to do, Clarke?" –Jasper asked her, his voice slightly mocking- "Walk into random villages asking for their Nightbloods?"

\- "If that's what it takes."

\- "No, Clarke." –Octavia was quick to disagree- "If A.L.I.E. can find us on Luna's rig, then she can find us anywhere. I won't help you destroy another innocent Grounder village."

\- "If we don't find a Nightblood, there won't be any Grounder villages left..."

\- "Do you honestly think anyone is going to hand Skaikru their Nightbloods, let alone to the Commander of Death." –Sam scoffed walking up next to us- "Your name doesn't inspire confidence Clarke, people avoid you for it."

\- "And yours does?" –Clarke almost laughed at her, clearly irritated by Sam's point- "Commander of Blood, what a joke!"

\- "That's not the point of this whole conversation but if you want to go there, I'll do you a favor and get this over with." –Sam stepped closer to Clarke, she didn't have any weapons on her but she was still intimidating- "If I'm a joke, Clarke, then so is the person that named me this."

\- "Titus." –Clarke simply whispered.

\- "Sure, but Lexa did make that title official, didn't see? You were there, so correct me if I'm wrong, Wanheda." –Sam smiled slightly- "The only difference between us is that you pulled a lever to get that name, I trained and bathed in blood for it and I'll kill anyone that stands in my way. Anyone." –Sam moved back, towards the Rover.

\- "Even Octavia?" –Clarke spoke but as soon as the words left her mouth she realized she shouldn't have as Sam stopped dead on her tracks.

\- "Jomp em op en yu jomp ai op." – [Attack her and you attack me] Sam looked at Clarke over her shoulder- "Try anything against her, you won't survive." –she turned again- "I don't hate you, Clarke, but you're making it very hard for me to like you right now. I don't know if you have a problem with me all of a sudden or if it's just the stress about this whole thing; whatever it is, fix it before anyone gets hurt."

Clarke looked at Sam move towards the Rover's back door and then glanced at us before walking away towards the forest as the three of us watched her go.

\- "She'll be fine." –Jasper said as he watched her go- "Just let her cool off and figure out what her issue with Sam is."

\- "Her issue really is that she's run out of ideas." –Sam jumped on the roof of the Rover out of nowhere- "I know it's nothing personal but someone had to call her out and, considering none of you ever really does, it may as well be me."

\- "So... Jusheda." –Jasper turned around to look at Sam- "Tell me about that."

Sam smiled, shaking her head but making herself comfortable, getting down next to Jasper and starting to tell him about how she got the name.

\--------------------------------------

After another 10 minutes, I checked the Rover's battery again.  _Almost full, finally._

\- "We should go after her." –Sam got down from the Rover before I could say anything about the battery.

\- "Clarke can take care of herself, Sam."

\- "No offense to her but if she encounters a couple of Grounders her gun will do nothing for her and you all know it." –Sam started walking on the direction Clarke had left, this time carrying her bow and a blade- "Trust me."

\- "I'm going with you." –I run up to her with my gun.

\- "The more, the merrier I suppose."

We followed Clarke's footsteps through the forest. Sam was quiet, tracking Clarke and being highly aware of her surroundings; I could see the difference since the last time we had done this together.  _Clearly, the time she spent with Sheda was an improvement in her skills._  I was concerned about this Jusheda thing, still.

\- "Sam..."

\- "I think I've made myself clear the first 30 times. Sam's not available." –she looked at me- "Jasper is the only one calling me that because I have a soft spot for him and we all know it."

\- "I know but Jusheda is not all you are."

\- "It is who I need to be now and you need to put on your leader façade for a solid second."

\- "I'm worried about you."

\- "Don't be, I can handle myself." –she took out her blade- "Worry about Clarke." –she pointed in front of me- "She's got company."

 _Roan._ She made me a sign to go towards my right as she went on the other direction and left before I could say anything.  _Good God, Sam... I thought we agreed no stupid ideas._ I took out my gun and approached them, coming out from behind a tree just as Roan turned around in my direction.

\- "You were saying?" –I asked, pointing the gun at him, Clarke standing on his right– "Hands where I can see them."

\- "Well, well, well..." –Sam chuckled coming up from behind Roan and placing her blade on his neck, clearly taking him by surprise- "If it isn't my favorite King of the Grounders."

\- "Jusheda." –Roan smiled as he put his arms up, not intimidated or threatened by Sam at all.

\- "To what do I owe the pleasure this time, huh?"

\- "I've been tracking you."

\- "Really?" –Sam kicked him on the knees, making him fall on them, her blade still on his neck- "Have you taken the chip?"

\- "If he had, he wouldn't have saved me." –Clarke pointed at a dead body a couple meters away from us with an arrow sticking from its back- "He is not chipped."

\- "I'm not risking it." –Sam spoke moving the blade, slightly cutting Roan's neck, nothing major but he still grunted, probably more annoyed than in pain- "You haven't? Good, I wouldn't enjoy killing you for that." –she let go of him and he moved his hand to his neck- "That's for what happened in the cave." –she moved next to him.

\- "I didn't kill you then."

\- "And I'm not killing you now." –Sam put her blade away- "Why didn't you?"

\- "We don't have time for this." –I moved next to them and knocked Roan out as he was distracted with Sam- "Let's go."

\- "And I'm the one prone to violence, huh?" –Sam scoffed squatting next to Roan, taking his bow and quiver as she patted him for blades.

\- "He's coming with us." –Clarke spoke to me.

\- "Like hell he is."

\- "We are kidnapping Azgeda's king?" –Sam looked at Clarke- "Hell, yeah, that sounds like fun." -she did look entertained.

\- "Are you both out of your minds?" –I looked at them putting my gun away- "Why would we do that?"

\- "Because I need answers."

\- "Because we want the same thing."

\- "Which is?"

\- "To put the flame in Ontari."

\- "If you think Ontari is going to help us, you really are out of ideas Clarke."

\- "Roan will help us." –Clarke maintained.

\- "Whatever you say, princess." –she walked past us, looking at me- "You knock him out, you carry him."

**\--------------------**

**CLARKE'S POV**

\- "You okay?" –Bellamy asked me as I watched Sam leave.

\- "Yeah."

\- "You sure?"

\- "This is our only option."

Bellamy tied Roan while he was still out and right before he came back to his senses, which was fortunate since now he could walk back to the Rover where everyone was already ready to leave.

\- "You gagged him?" –Sam shook her head, entertained- "I was planning on having a conversation."

\- "Can I talk with you?" –I moved next to her as she nodded while everyone else got inside the Rover- "I'm sorry."

\- "Don't apologize Clarke." –she smiled- "I know it wasn't personal, you're just under a lot of pressure, I get it. Feel free to call me out whenever you need to let out some stamina."

\- "Thank you." –I spoke as she hugged me- "Really."

\- "I got your back, princess."

\- "Lexa saw something in you."

\- "Just like she did with you. Not so personal though." -she squeezed my shoulders- "I'm sorry about..."

\- "She was..." -I cut her off but I trailed off instantly- "She is still here."

\- "The Flame, I know." -she looked at me- "Just because she's gone from this plain of existence doesn't mean you have to forget her, Clarke. You love her and she'll always be part of you... I think that's beautiful. Tragic yet beautiful in a way."

She let go off me and got in the Rover and so did I. After a couple hours, we finally got to Arkadia; they were waiting for us with the doors open as Bellamy had called to let them know we were coming back. We drove back as fast as we could, quickly getting out of the Rover as we arrived.

\- "Glad you made it back." –Monty was the first to greet us.

\- "Yeah." –Raven agreed- "We were getting worried." –she looked at all of us, her face showing now confusion instead of relief- "Where's Luna?"

\- "Luna said no." –Octavia informed them as Bellamy pushed Roan in front of him.

\- "Who the hell is this?"

\- "He's Ice Nation." –Bryan pointed out as Harper looked at us, unconvinced.

\- "He's the King of Ice Nation." –Sam spoke walking past us- "An old friend of ours, ain't that right, Roan?"

\- "He's also our way into Polis."

\- "This way, your highness." –Bellamy started moving again with Roan- "You two..." –he looked at Bryan and Miller- "...come with me, I'll take him to lockup."

\- "Not many good memories there." –Sam mumbled beside me, gaining a disapproving and concerned look from most people there- "What?" –she argued back- "It's not like you all aren't thinking the same."

Bellamy left followed by the guys as everyone digested Sam's words.

\- "So..." –Raven looked at me- "You wanna use him to get to Ontari?"

\- "Yes."

\- "What happened to his neck." –Harper questioned.

\- "That was me." –Sam raised her hand, pleased smile on her face.

\- "Good luck getting him to cooperate."

\- "Hey, I had to even it out. Besides, Clarke can be very convincing if she outs herself to it." –Sam patted me on the back and I nodded.

**\----------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

After Clarke and I spoke with Roan, convincing him that there was only one side he could be in, we moved back to the hangar to prepare to leave for Polis.

\- "Knockout gas." –Miller informed me as he placed a bag in the Rover- "Mount Weather's finest; as soon as they bring Ontari out, we put them to sleep."

\- "Nice."

\- "Because she's chipped, you have to EMP her like you did me before you give her the Flame."

\- "I thought Jaha destroyed all the wristbands." –Jasper pointed out.

\- "So did he." –Raven faced him- "Then I came home." –she then addressed Clarke- "There's only enough usable parts to rebuild one, so use it wisely. Made a few improvements too."

\- "None of which is gonna work if you can't get us access to A.L.I.E.'s code."

\- "You worry about the Nightblood, I'll worry about A.L.I.E."

\- "How can you access a code that doesn't exist here anymore?" –Jasper moved up to them.

\- "We've got a plan."

\- "What are we waiting for?" –Octavia asked, coming into the hangar followed by Roan and Sam.

\- "Let's move out." –I commanded as Roan and Octavia got in the Rover.

\- "Be safe." –Clarke hugged Jasper.

\- "Until we meet again." –I said goodbye to Harper.

\- "Relax, people." –Sam rested against the Rover- "We're only going on a suicide mission, what could go wrong?"

\- "A bunch of things, actually." –Raven turned to answer her with a smile on her face.

\- "Then it's a good thing I have experience on those, isn't it?" –Sam walked up to her and hugged her tightly- "You got this, Raven."

\- "Don't do anything stupid."

\- "Ugh, you all need to stop with the 'stupid' narrative, it's getting old." –Sam walked up to Jasper- "Don't get in trouble while I'm gone, alright?"

\- "Stay alive."

\- "I'll try my best, J."

And with that, and after saying goodbye to all our friends, Clarke, Sam, Miller, and Bryan got on the Rover as I started it, leaving Arkadia once again. We had a plan, simple but effective. We just needed Ontari. It was already well into the night when we got to the point where we had to leave the Rover.

\- "We stop here."

We all got out of the Rover. The air was cold but the night was clear.

\- "All right, this is where we split up." –Roan spoke first- "The entrance to the tunnel is right over there..."

\- "Yeah." -I cut him off- "We know where it is."

\- "I'm gonna need the Flame." –he looked at Clarke, who eyed him hesitantly- "Look, this only works if they send Ontari out to get it; if they don't see it, they won't do that. Not much of a trap without the bait."

\- "He's right." –Sam moved next to Roan- "I'll keep an eye on the Flame for you, Clarke."

\- "What?" –I was quick to intercede- "That's not the plan."

\- "Why?" –Clarke asked her, much calmer than I was.

\- "I mean, he can't just get in there without an actual excuse as to why he wasn't there in the first place, right?" –she eyed me as she answered Clarke- "I am the excuse."

\- "That is the definition of a stupid plan."

\- "No, it's the definition of a brilliant plan. I'm not as valuable as you all are, especially Clarke, she can activate the Flame or whatever. You have to protect her." -she turned to Clarke- "If they get you, we're doomed." –she turned to Roan- "Back me up a little, will you?"

\- "Jusheda's right. She declared war on Azgeda, she's perfect bait."

\- "I don't care." –I fisted my hands- "I don't trust you."

\- "It's not about trust anymore, Blake, this is about survival. Do your part, we'll do ours." –she looked at Clarke- "You know this is what has to be done."

\- "Fine."

Clarke handed the Flame to Roan as the frustration grew inside me.

\- "Ste kiken, sistris." [Stay alive, sister] –Octavia hugged Sam, agreeing too on the plan.

\- "Yu seintaim. Ai na ai yu op pas osir win disha wor au." [You too. I'll see you once we win this war.]

\- "Let's go."

\- "Right behind you, Sir King."

Roan started walking as Sam waved goodbye at us but I caught her arm as she turned around to stop her.

\- "Sam..." –she rose an eyebrow at me- "Fine, Jusheda. Don't do anything more stupid than you already are, alright?"

\- "Jusheda doesn't do stupid."

\- "But Sam does, and I don't care how convinced you are you can separate them both, you can't."

\- "We're at war, Bellamy. Feelings have no place here."

\- "You can't just turn them off."

\- "Watch me." –she took a step back- "The reason we're in this mess on the first place is feelings. I don't need them."

\- "What do you mean?"

\- "People started taking the chip because they were afraid of looking for an escape."

\- "And you wouldn't have taken it had you been on their place?"

\- "Fuck no. I've only been truly afraid once and I don't plan on that happening ever again because you're going to be safe, alright!" –she rose her voice as I understood the implication behind her words, an implication her face showed she didn't want to admit- "Take this." –she was quick to speak again, handing me her bow and quiver- "I don't intend on letting Roan touch it... so keep it safe."

\- "Stay alive alright?" –I took a step towards her; she may not have wanted to show feelings but I knew her all too well- "I love you." –I caressed her cheek and her eyes softened for a moment.

\- "I really should have knocked you down and tied you back in Arkadia."

She gave me a soft smile before taking my hand in hers and squeezing it for a second; then, she turned around to go after Roan. I shookmy head, aware of the stupid smile plastered on my face.  _I'm so in love, it's ridiculous._ I moved back to the Rover, intending to put Sam's bow in a safe place for her.

\- "Is that...?" –Miller started looking at Sam's bow on my hands and I nodded- "This is getting serious."

**\---------------**

**SAM'S POV**

I followed Roan through the forest. It was quiet and peaceful.  _Kinda missed this feeling._  The light appeared on the horizon as we reached the outskirts of Polis.

\- "Alright, so..." –I started- "Why didn't you kill me?"

\- "You can't stay quiet for long, can you?"

\- "I want answers."

\- "You turn weak around him."

\- "Your point?"

\- "The only thing that makes you weak is your feelings for the boy. And your sister."

\- "I'm not in need of a therapy session, Roan. Answer me."

\- "The Ambassador spoke to me about you."

\- "You people really enjoy gossip." –I smiled to myself- "But your Ambassador only saw me after you spared my life so this has nothing to do with it."

\- "Just because he didn't see you until then doesn't mean he didn't know about you."

\- "Continue."

\- "Rumors spread fast, Jusheda. Yours got to Azgeda just like Wanheda's did."

\- "But I'm not worthy of being killed for my power, understood."

\- "If the Queen had captured you, she'd have killed you."

\- "Not very reassuring."

\- "You have an attitude problem."

\- "Stop analyzing me and give me a straight answer."

\- "No time, we are here." –he stopped and turned to face me- "You need to look like a prisoner."

\- "You're not getting rid of me that easily."

\- "Hand me your weapons."

I rolled my eyes but taking all my weapons out of their hidden places and handing them to him, knowing this is what I had agreed on. He wasn't quite content for he chose to search me after everything; then, he tied my hands on the front and gagged me.

\- "In case anything goes wrong." –he placed a small blade up my sleeve- "You never know." –I nodded, thankful- "Ready?" –another nod- "Let's go."

I didn't quite understand why Roan would even care for my safety at all, after all, I had declared war on Azgeda single-handedly after the explosion, but he didn't seem to care.  _Until we get to Ontari, probably._  As we got to Polis, I realized everything was awfully quiet and I didn't like it one bit.  _I know they are chipped, but can't they like, do stuff?_

\- "When this is over..." –Roan spoke without looking at me as we walked through the streets- "...Ontari will know you helped her. We won't hurt you, you have my word." –I rose an unimpressed eyebrow at him- "Your people will be safe too."

I nodded this time as he looked at me.  _Let's get this shit over with then._  As we got to the tower's entrance, we still hadn't seen much people, only the ones kneeled at that plaza, who had their eyes closed.  _This is not normal._

\- "So much for the thousands of people."

_Agreed._

\- "Here we go." –Roan spoke as he saw Bellamy's signal, letting us know they were ready- "I'm Roan, King of Azgeda." –he spoke up as he took out the Flame to showcase it, turning around so everyone could see it.  _That'd be useful if they had their eyes open_ \- "And I have what the Commander seeks alongside a gift." –he looked at me.

 _Great, now I'm also an accessory. Unexpected._  Suddenly, everyone in the plaza opened their eyes and rose, looking at us, most of them armed.  _What's going on?_  One of them approached us.

\- "I don't like what I'm sensing." –Roan spoke for both of us- "So, if she wants it, she can come to me."

Out of the tower Jaha came followed by two Grounders.  _Something's wrong._

\- "Hello, Samantha." –he looked at me as I tried very hard not to lose control- "Sheda will be pleased to see you."

And that was it. I tried to get rid of Roan by pulling as hard as I could on the rope to get to Jaha, but Roan pulled me back. I tried to scream at Jaha but the gag in my mouth prevented me from doing so.

\- "Who are you?" –Roan asked- "Where's Ontari?"

\- "Not coming out." –Jaha answered turning to look at him- "But you can give the Flame to me, I'll make sure she gets it." –Roan must have done something for Jaha smiled to himself- "Your friends in the tunnel can't help you."

 _They know. Fuck._ I turned my face to look at where Octavia was supposed to be, wishing the gag wasn't on my mouth. I tried to mouth something.

\- "Now, give me the Flame."

Jaha insisted as the people got closer to Roan and me, forming a circle we couldn't get out from. Suddenly, Roan pulled me back, placing one of my blades to my neck.  _Poetic irony._

\- "Back up or she dies."

\- "Save the theatrics, we know you're together." –Jaha informed us- "We know everything."

I zoned out for a second.  _Then that means one of us is chipped; it's not Octavia, Clarke or Bellamy; we got Raven's chip out; Miller, Bryan, Monty, Harper or Jasper..._ Roan tightened his grip on my neck, making me focus once more on the present; I felt his other hand lower to my hands, loosening the knot slightly, enough so that I could use the blade.

\- "Run." –he pushed me back after cutting my gag with the blade he had on my neck.

I took my own small blade out and started moving back after him; he stopped dead on his tracks and I almost bumped into him, avoiding his body just in time to stand next to him to see Kane pointing a gun at him.

\- "We don't need you."

\- "Roan!"

I yelled as I watched him fall after the shot; I tried to get to him, being stopped by a couple Grounders; I knew they were being controlled but I had to do something: I cut one on the leg and pushed back the other one, trying to get to Roan.

\- "Stop fighting, Samantha." –Jaha's voice sounded behind me as two grounders took Roan away- "It's over."

\- "Where is Sheda!" –I yelled turning back to look at him.

\- "He's safe."

\- "No one's safe here."

\- "Sam..."

 _No, no, no, no._ I looked to my left and my heart dropped to the floor.  _No. Not you._ I felt my strength leave my body as I slowly turned to face him completely, forgetting about everything else going on and the threat ahead of us.

\- "Sheda..." -I breathed out.

\- "Don't fight Sam, it's okay." –he approached me, unarmed and with a smile on his lips- "You're going to be okay."

\- "Sheda, please..." –I felt the tears in my eyes, taking one step back- "Don't make me hurt you."

\- "You don't have to hurt me. I'm your friend, I love you. You love me."

\- "Why...?"

\- "Give me the blade."

He stood directly in front of me; I could see him clear as I could see the sky but he wasn't there, that wasn't him. Sheda knew I wouldn't hurt him and so did I; I hated myself, he was there because I asked him too. This was my fault. I had to fix this.

\- "What did they do to you?" –I touched his face, I couldn't stop myself- "Why did you take the chip?" –his skin felt warm, his stubble beard scratching the tips of my fingers and I couldn't help but smile at the feeling.

\- "Take it and you'll know why." –he caressed my cheek, his hand moving down my neck to rest on my shoulder, he was so close I could feel his rhythmic breath on my face.

\- "I can't do that." –I moved my hands back to the side of my body, refusing to lose eye contact with him.

\- "I can't let you go."

He was quick to knock me down, easier and faster than usual for I didn't fight him back. I couldn't. I gave up, dropping my blade and allowing him to carry me inside the Tower in his arms without opposing any resistance.

\- "I'm so sorry, Sheda."


	28. Save him.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam is taken to the throne room moments before the only person that shouldn’t be there, gets there.

**BELLAMY'S POV**

Once we were in position, I made Roan a signal as we saw him coming into the plaza with a gagged and tied up Sam, which I wasn't keen at all on.

\- "She's going to be okay."

Clarke whispered next to me as we all got in place.  _Let's hope we all get out of this one._  Roan announced himself, showing the Flame around and asking for Ontari to come down to get it, just as we had planned; soon enough, everyone around them rose and Roan asked again to see Ontari, more so demanded. Noise came from the Tower's entrance, but it wasn't Ontari, it was Jaha.

\- "What the hell is he doing here?" –Octavia was quick to speak as soon as we saw him.

\- "You see Ontari?" –Miller asked.

\- "No." –I was quick to answer without moving my eyes from Roan, Sam, and Jaha- "Hold."

Jaha stood in front of Sam and after no more than 5 seconds, Sam immediately tried to throw herself onto him, trying to get him but being quickly pulled back by Roan.

\- "Something's wrong." –Octavia murmured, her eyebrows slightly furrowed.

\- "Why are you saying that?" –Bryan asked her.

\- "You've seen Sam trying to kill Jaha just now."

\- "It's Sam..."

\- "She wouldn't risk the whole plan if Jaha hadn't pressed an unlucky button."

As Octavia spoke, Sam turned to look in our direction; her eyes said it all: something really was wrong. a second later, Roan pulled her back to him, a blade to her neck as the chipped people started to surround them.

\- "Do it!" –I yelled at Bryan and Miller, concern spilling with my words as I saw the blade to Sam's neck.  _This is not happening again_ \- "Now!"

\- "On your knees!" –a couple Grounders came from behind us, efficiently startling us and frustrating our plan- "Drop your weapons!"

We tried to fight them back but they had taken us all by surprise, taking our weapons and making us face the wall to see what was coming next. Roan pulled Sam with him and they started to run away but Kane came out of nowhere, shooting Roan.  _He's chipped too._  Sam fought back, not killing anyone but hard enough to get rid of them, trying to get to Roan but failing as two other Grounders took him away. I couldn't tear my eyes away from her; she was alone in the middle of everything and I couldn't help her. Jaha must have shouted something at her as she turned around and then, she froze.

\- "Is that...?

Octavia asked as we were being tied up, her voice was nothing more than a whisper, but she was worried and she didn't even bother trying to hide it; I squeezed my eyes, looking everywhere around Sam to understand what Octavia meant and, as she moved slightly to one side, I saw him.

\- "Sheda." –I breathed out.

Sam's body language was completely out of place: surrounded by potential threats she was merely standing in front of him, her shoulders dropped making her look small and fragile in the middle of the crowd. She slowly raised her hand to Sheda's face as if to make sure he was real; he rested his hand on her shoulder as he spoke but I couldn't hear them. Jaha moved back inside, knowing he had won as we all witnessed Sam's usual façade falling to pieces; she moved her arm back to her side, Sheda quickly knocking her down as I screamed for her but she refused to do anything against him; her hand opened, letting go of her blade, of her only weapon; she couldn't fight him, O knew it, I knew it and so did A.L.I.E. which is why Sheda was probably there on the first place. Sam stood there, she gave up; for the first time since I met her, she surrendered herself and allowed Sheda to take her inside the Tower.  _Sam..._  I looked impotent at the scene in front of me, until Sam was no longer there, then being taken back by the Grounders that had captured us.  _There has to be something we... I have to do something._  As we were taken through the tunnels, they took Clarke away from the group; we tried to fight them but we were outnumbered and prisoners.

\- "Don't hurt them!" –Clarke pleaded as each of us was punched for fighting back- "I'll go, I'll go."

And with that, Clarke was gone too.

**\----------------**

**SAM'S POV**

_This is my fault, this is my fault._  Sheda was taking me to the throne room; he didn't need to tell me, I knew this tower like the back of my hand by now.  _Why would he have taken the chip after everything he knows it does?_ And then...

\- "Where's Lila?"

I looked up at Sheda and he turned his face to look at me with a smile. The whole situation looked to me like a big joke. He put me on the floor of the elevator and I quickly turned around to face him.

\- "Where's Lila, A.L.I.E?"

\- "She's in the City of Light, she's okay, she's safe."

It was like a kick on my stomach. I felt sick.

\- "She's just a kid!"

\- "She's safe."

\- "Can't you say anything else besides that!" –I yelled, losing my temper- "I am fucking tired of hearing the same thing over and over and over again!"

\- "You will soon understand."

The elevator's door opened and Sheda pushed me outside as we walked towards the room.  _There's not much security here, interesting. Well, I'm not about to make this easy._  I entered the room to be met with Jaha and Abbie.  _This just gets worse by the second._

\- "Samantha, thank you for joining us." –Jaha greeted me walking in front of me.

\- "Well, you didn't give me much of a choice, did you?"

\- "Ah, Sheda, yes." –a pleased smile on his face making my stomach turn- "It was quite fortunate that he was here to join us when he did, you did well sending him here, Samantha." -he faced Sheda as I felt the immeasurable need to break his face- "You may go."

\- "No!" –I turned around grabbing Sheda's arm, forgetting all about Jaha's words- "Don't go. I'd rather have you around so that I know what you're doing. Well, what your body is doing at least."

\- "As you wish."

Jaha spoke, I turned just in time to see the smile on his face and I knew saying that had been a mistake.  _First rule of war: no emotions. Have we not learned from our mistakes? Clearly not._ Everyone looked like they were having a conversation but, of course, I wasn't part of it, I couldn't see the bitch; I was just moved to a chair and tied up by Sheda who didn't say anything else.

\- "I'm not taking that chip."

\- "Time."

Abbie's single word unsettled me more than anything else had so far as they moved on again to this half-sided conversation that I was getting really tired of, but I knew the only way to get the whole picture was taking the chip and that was not going to happen; I knew what A.L.I.E. did with people's memories: she erased them and used all the information to push the remaining un-chipped to the edge, just like she had done at Niylah's house with Raven. I couldn't give her access to my brain, I knew she'd use it to get to my friends, my family... although Bellamy worried me more than O, for I knew he still wasn't in the best place mentally. The doors of the room opened again, revealing an agitated Clarke being pushed inside by another Grounder.  _This is so not good._  Before Clarke could say anything, Abbie wrapped her arms around her.

\- "I've missed you."

\- "I won't take the chip." –Clarke pulled away from her mom- "Ever."

\- "Right now, we just need your help with the Flame." –Abbie explained sweetly- "What's the passphrase, Clarke?"

\- "Fuck off, A.L.I.E." –I couldn't help myself- "That's the password. You're welcome."

\- "You okay?" –Clarke asked as she landed eyes on me.

\- "Been better."

Sheda and another Grounder quickly took Clarke as she tried to fight back and pushed her over next to the throne and into what I'd have called a rather peculiar torturing device, tying her hands behind her back as she was still standing against a post and wrapping a collar around her neck to prevent her from moving.  _Well, at least I'm sat._

\- "Please, mom..." –she begged- "Don't let them do this."

\- "I'm not letting them do this. I'm doing it."

My eyes almost popped from my skull as I saw the psycho smile on Abbie's face and the look of pure horror on Clarke's as her mom moved to her medical bag, taking out a scalpel and moving in front of her.

\- "Hey!" –I yelled- "Leave Clarke alone, you psycho bitch! Pick on someone your own species!"

An arm wrapped around my neck and a hand covered my mouth from behind me preventing me from moving and forcing me to watch as Abbie cut Clarke just under her collarbones; she let out a couple screams of pain but stood her ground regarding giving them the passphrase. I was so proud of her strength.  _Now, this is the kind of royalty I can stand beside._

\- "This can stop Clarke." –Jaha crossed his arms over his chest as Abbie placed a cotton pad over Clarke's new wound- "Just tell us what we need to know."

\- "I told you this wouldn't work." –Abbie looked behind her to talk with nobody as Clarke kept silent- "She's not going to tell us, she'll die before that."

\- "But will she let someone else die?" –Jaha turned to look at me and the pressure around my mouth loosened.

\- "Listen, you have the wrong person if you think she's going to speak for my life." –I laughed- "You're really out of track here."

\- "Bring Bellamy Blake."

Hearing Abbie say his name infuriated me more than anything ever had; firstly, because I loved that idiot and I wasn't about to watch him bleed and secondly, because that meant Abbie thought Bellamy was special to Clarke. And I was going to have none of that.  _You want Jusheda? Fine._  Since the person behind me had let go of me, I moved on the chair with enough force to drop backward, freeing my legs as I moved the rope tying them up past its legs just in time to kick the Grounder that was coming after me on the ankle, making him fall next to me and hitting him with my head on his, which is always a bad idea, but desperate times require desperate measures. I rose quickly trying to get rid of the knots that still tied my hands to the chair as Ontari moved after me; I wasn't sure if she wanted to kill me, but I wasn't just going to stay to see what happened; I ran back towards a column, smashing the chair against it easily breaking it into pieces but not in time to fight Ontari back as she kicked me on the stomach making me fall back on my ass. Hands now free too.

\- "Now, we're equal."

I smiled as I rose from the floor, hands up, ready to strike but instead of fighting me, she moved away.  _Well, that can't be good._  Instead, Sheda walked up to me.

\- "Don't fight it, Sam, you can't win." -his stance was threatening but I wasn't scared for my life, rather for his own safety.

\- "Stay back, Sheda."

\- "Nou gonplei, kika." [Don't fight, survivor]

I knew the nickname was supposed to ease me but it did the exact opposite.

\- "Yu laik nou Sheda." [You aren't Sheda] –I moved up to him as he took a couple steps back, now we both standing in the middle of the room- "Ai na en ai na win yu au, A.L.I.E." [I can and I will win you, A.L.I.E.]

I fought Sheda this time, I just wanted to hurt him enough so that he'd have to stop fighting. I didn't want to kill him. However, he had trained me, he knew my moves and he had the advantage of being connected to every mind out there that had ever seen me fight; most of them, anyway. I couldn't win unless I did kill him.

\- "I'm not going to stop fighting." –I yelled as I took a couple steps back from Sheda, I was already bleeding from my mouth and the pain was starting to get slightly concerning as I had forgotten he couldn't feel anything but I still could- "And I won't kill my friend."

\- "I know."

Out of nowhere, Ontari appeared behind Sheda; he dropped to his knees, raising his head slightly.  _No._ She took a blade and placed it to his neck.

\- "Sheda, fight back!"

\- "Take the chip, Sam." -his voice was patronizing.

\- "I can't." –I cried out as Ontari started to move the blade- "Stop, stop!"

\- "Next will be Bellamy."

 _I need time. We need time._ I let my head fall forward, feeling my breath quickening as the panic settled on my chest.  _I can't let them kill Sheda._  I felt tears in my eyes.  _And I sure as hell won't let them touch Bellamy._  I rose my head.  _I'm sure they'll come up with something; I trust he will._ I looked at Jaha.  _I'll give you as much time as I can, love. I have faith in you. Forgive me for doing this._

\- "I'll take it."

\- "Sam, no!" –Clarke yelled at me.

\- "I'm not making it out of this one, Clarke." –I smiled at her- "I have to ask you to save them all again."

\- "Sam, I..."

\- "Enough talking." –Jaha rose his hand.

\- "But first I want something in exchange." –Jaha moved his hand, prompting me to continue- "Let Sheda leave the Tower and go with Lila. Leave them out of this."

Jaha looked at me, entertained by my unusual request. He then looked to his side, to look at A.L.I.E. I supposed. Sheda suddenly rose from his knees and walked past me, leaving the Throne room without saying anything, let alone sparing me a glance.

\- "Now..."

\- "And..." –I interrupted him.

\- "We don't have time for this." –Abbie spoke to Jaha but he seemed to have all the time in the world.

\- "We won't hurt the Blake siblings..." –I nodded, not even impressed they knew what I wanted- "Now, the chip, Samantha."

I moved my hand to the pocket over my chest, taking out the chip he had handed me when I had been incarcerated by Pike in Arkadia.  _Huh, I wonder what happened to that asshole._

\- "Where did you get that?" –Clarke was quick to ask- "You were intending on taking it?!"

\- "Jaha gave it to me when Pike sentenced me to death." –I spoke, glad Clarke was helping me win time even if she didn't know it- "He said it'd take the pain away but I refused to take it for I was going to die anyway."

Jaha approached me, taking the chip from my hand and inspecting it for a second before putting his hand on my chin.

\- "Time's up, Samantha." –he moved his hand up with the chip- "Join us."

\- "Save him." –I looked at Clarke one final time right before Jaha placed the chip on my tongue.

\- "We won't hurt them if they cooperate."

Jaha whispered just in time for me to fully process the information and feel the rage burning my face as my eyes closed, clenching my fists, before I forgot...

\- "Welcome to the City of Light, Samantha."

**\-----------**

**3rd POV**

Clarke screams for Samantha to stop but it's useless, it's too late as Jaha places the chip over Samantha's tongue and she swallows it: her friend isn't there anymore.  _"Save him."_  The words echo in Clarke's brain until she realizes what Samantha was really doing: gaining time to save everyone but, most importantly, to save the life of the one she would never sacrifice: Bellamy Blake.

\- "Now that Samantha has joined us, it will be much easier to get everyone else to take the key." –Jaha speaks, pleased with himself- "So much pain..." –he lets go of Samantha's face as she remains still with her eyes closed- "Her willpower is monumental, with this much pain others wouldn't have doubted taking the key much sooner."

\- "Samantha has always been particularly stubborn." –Abbie speaks and looks at Clarke- "The Grounders crowned you Commander of Death because of how many lives you've ended..."

\- "But Samantha has been surrounded by death since our days back in the Ark..." –Jaha continued Abbie's statement- "Everyone she cared about died... or will be dead soon."

\- "Clarke, baby, take it." –Abbie approaches her with another chip- "Join us. Join your friend."

\- "No."

\- "With all these new data..." –Jaha speaks- "...it won't be hard to make everyone else join us. Samantha's memories are the key to everything, we should have known."

\- "Bring Bellamy Blake." –Abbie turns to the two guards at the door who leave the room promptly.

\- "No, no!" –Clarke struggles against her ropes.

\- "From my own memories, I would have never thought Samantha was capable of that love." –Jaha speaks ignoring Clarke and facing Samantha who opens her eyes as he addresses her- "Once he comes in, you'll be the one to torture him until Clarke agrees to take the chip and so does he."

\- "What makes you think torturing Bellamy will make me take the chip?" –Clarke questions trying to look as calm as possible.

\- "He told Monty he didn't want to choose between us." –Samantha approaches her, almost robotic- "That can only mean he feels some type of way about you." –she smiles- "And now that you know that, I know you won't let him die... I know you won't let me kill him."

Clarke gulps as she realizes her friend is really gone, just like Raven had and her mom was now too. She knows she has to find a way; Samantha had been right, she couldn't let her kill him; if Samantha ever came back to her senses, that'd destroy her, and Clarke herself couldn't even think of losing them both. She had to do something. But what?


	29. Boundaries.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The person Bellamy would have least expected saves the day as A.L.I.E. does the impossible to recruit everyone.

**BELLAMY'S POV**

The rest of us were being taken through the tunnels to be incarcerated until we agreed to take the chip but no before they beat us; they started with Miller, who fell to the floor after a particularly hard hit on the jaw. The chipped that was hitting him suddenly stopped and looked into the void for a second, before turning to his partners.

\- "Let's go. She wants Bellamy."

I wasn't exactly surprised to hear my name but still, resisted to being pulled away from my people as two Grounders forced me up from the floor.

\- "Where are you taking him?"

Octavia rose from the floor too, her voiced scared and anxious for me felt foreign after all the resentment she had been throwing at me. As she did, one of the remaining chipped hit her on the stomach to make her both fall and shut up.

\- "O!" –I tried to gain her attention- "It's okay, O."

The two Grounders started carrying me away from her.  _She wants me. A.L.I.E. wants me. Sam..._

\- "If I were you, I'd hit the deck."

\- "Murphy?"

I questioned recognizing his voice but not fully comprehending why he was or how he got here. One of the men carrying me, took out a flashlight, pointing it in front of us and revealing Murphy.

\- "Everyone hit the ground!"

I yelled as soon as I saw him, getting rid of the two men just in time to hear the shots from in front of me, witnessing the chipped men fall dead to my sides.

\- "Fancy meeting you here." –Murphy walked up to me after the shots were fired.

* * *

 

\- "More will come." –Indra was with him- "We have to hurry."

\- "You okay?" –Pike asked me as he freed my hands while Murphy and Indra moved towards the rest of my group.

\- "Thank you." –I nodded at him, not quite knowing how to feel about this meeting. I turned around to talk with Murphy- "What are you doing here?"

\- "You're welcome."

Murphy gave me a side smile before moving back to greet the rest while Indra helped Octavia.

\- "You're with Pike?" –Octavia incredulously asked Indra.

\- "The only way to get out of here is together."

\- "He killed Lincoln." –Octavia informed her for she didn't know about this yet- "Put him on his knees, shot him in the head."

\- "O..." –I tried to intercede before they started a fight- "Indra's right, we need every fighter we can get."

\- "Did you guys miss the part where it's time to go?" –Murphy asked, already ready to leave.

\- "We're not living."

\- "We just saved your lives." –he answered me with a funny look- "Why do I think I'm gonna regret that?"

\- "Clarke's in trouble."

\- "Clarke's always in trouble."

\- "They took her and the Flame to the tower. It's a safe bet Ontari's there too. Everything we need to stop A.L.I.E. is in the same place."

\- "If we go up that tower we won't be able to fight our way out again." –Indra was quick to counterpart me.

\- "My sister is up there." –Octavia looked at Indra- "I'm not leaving without her."

\- "Sam?" –Murphy asked, concern washing over his face- "Why didn't you start with that, huh?" –he looked at me before turning to Pike- "Well, looks like you're going to have a very interesting reunion."

\- "And after we save your friend how do you suggest we'll get out of here?" –Pike switched his stance as Murphy mentioned Sam before asking me.

\- "We won't need to if we stop A.L.I.E." –I answered and he sighed before handing me a gun.

\- "Up the tower we go then." –Murphy scoffed with a smile on his face- "Sam's gonna owe me big time."

\- "Right... if she doesn't kill you for leaving." –I smiled- "I know you care about her."

\- "After this, doing the right thing can kiss my ass."

_Hold on, Sam, we're coming._

**\---------------------**

**MURPHY'S POV**

I obviously couldn't leave knowing my friend was with the crazy robot. We didn't have much time for explanations as we all made it towards where the elevator was. Pike immediately killing the two guards monitoring it.  _I can see why no one likes this guy, yes._

\- "Hey!" –Bellamy yelled at him- "I told you that is not how we're doing this!"

\- "They were in our way."

\- "These people are not our enemy, they're being controlled by A.L.I.E. and we can save them."

\- "There' gonna be a lot more of these people if we don't move." –Miller quickly rushed us- "Come on."

\- "I'll bring it down." –the woman Grounder, whose name I finally learned was Indra, said as she approached the lever to bring the elevator down.

\- "once we're up, you blow the elevator and then climb." –Bellamy ordered.

\- "Destroy the ladder behind us." –Bryan nodded- "On it."

\- "You do realize we don't have a way down, right?"

\- "A problem for another day." –Indra quickly answered me.

\- "Let's go, our ride's here."

Bellamy instructed me, so I simply nodded and opened the elevator's doors, getting inside, followed by him.

\- "O..." –he looked at his sister- "You coming?"

\- "If anything goes wrong down here, they'll need my help." –she quickly answered- "Go save my sister."

She didn't give time for Bellamy to answer as she closed the doors right after finishing. The elevator started moving soon after.

\- "So... when did you both finally get together?"

\- "What?"

\- "Bellamy, please, we're past this. Sam and you."

\- "Things are... complicated right now."

\- "You fucked up, didn't you?"

\- "It's a long story."

\- "Your face is still the same so it can't have been that bad." –he looked at me, an eyebrow raised as if he suddenly couldn't understand me- "I'm sure Sam would get in a physical fight with you if you fucked up big time, things can't be going that bad if you're still coming to save her and breathing perfectly through your nose."

\- "She broke up with me."

\- "Huh."

 _So they got together but then, puff... Interesting. Sam's a very impulsive person but I'm sure she wouldn't just break up with him without a substantial reason. Oh._  I eyed him up and down for a second.  _If he cheated, I will hang him completely this time I'm sure Emori would help me._

\- "You probably deserved it." –I chose my words carefully.

\- "I'm trying to make things right."

The elevator abruptly stopped when we were still not at the top, the doors being forced open from outside; A.L.I.E. knew we were coming and she was trying to stop us.

\- "Maybe you should start with staying alive." –I pointed with my head at the door.

**\-------------------**

**CLARKE'S POV**

After Sam took the chip, everything seemed to stop.  _I can't let Sam kill Bellamy. Why didn't you share your plans with me, Sam? I can't read minds!_  My mom, who was by my side, looked at Sam who had moved towards the pillars that got to the second floor of the room and climbed up.

\- "What are you doing?"

I yelled but received no answer. As Sam got to the border, facing us, Jaha threw a rope towards her that she moved back to pass through something up there I couldn't see while my mother moved a barrel under the ledge.  _They're gonna hang him._

\- "Don't be afraid." –my mom came back next to me, caressing my cheek as Sam got down- "It's not for you." –she then moved back towards the barrel.

\- "Mom!" –I yelled as I realized she was going to hand herself- "Mom! Stop! Listen to me. I know you can hear me. Just stop!"

\- "You know how to stop this."

\- "Wai! A.L.I.E., if you kill her, you'll never get what you want."

\- "A.L.I.E.'s not killing me, Clarke, you are."

\- "Mom, don't do this, please." –she simply smiled at me- "I'm begging you, don't do it."

\- "What's the passphrase, Clarke?" –Sam moved in front of me.

\- "Sam, I need you to fight back. I need you." –she moved back- "Bellamy needs you!"

\- "Wrong answer."

Sam kicked the barrel under my mom's feet, hanging her as I yelled for them to stop, tears falling down my face.

\- "I'm so sorry." – _I couldn't break_ \- "I can't..."

I watched my mom gasp for air, but not really putting any effort to break the rope around her neck.  _I'm so sorry, mom, I'm so sorry._

\- "I understand." –Ontari spoke, moving back and picking up a crowbar and moving to the front of the room.

\- "What are you doing?" –I asked as I watched her kneel down and offer the crowbar to Jaha- "Wait, stop!"

 _They're going to kill her._ Jaha looked at Sam.

\- "Jusheda, please." –he motioned with his hand for Sam to take his place.

\- "Sam!" –I yelled as she took the bar- "Don't do this! She's our only hope, Sam!"

The sound of the breaking bones as the metal hit Ontari's skull was enough to turn my stomach upside down. Jaha and Sam both turned to face the same place in the room, probably where A.L.I.E. was standing; Jaha immediately took the bar from Sam, who moved back, away from my view. Suddenly, the doors opened, revealing Bellamy and Murphy, armed.

\- "Stop him!"

I yelled looking at Jaha, who received a shot just before he could hit Ontari again. Murphy moved to cut my mom's ties as Bellamy knocked Jaha out before cutting my ties.

\- "You okay?" –he asked me, but I was too focused on my mom to even process his words.

\- "Is she alive?" –I asked Murphy who was checking my mom's pulse- "Is she breathing?"

\- "It's okay, she's breathing."

As soon as I got the ok from Murphy, I moved to check on Ontari, asking Bellamy to take the Flame from Jaha.

\- "Don't bother." –Sam came out of the shadows with two knives on her hands- "She's brain dead."

\- "Sam, you're okay..." –I heard the relief in Bellamy's voice as he rose to move towards her.

\- "She's taken the chip." –I warned him and he stopped dead in his tracks.

\- "What?!"

\- "You lose." –she faced Bellamy- "I'm going to need the Flame now, love."

Bellamy moved back slowly, his movements were not how he usually moved: they were doubtful, almost messy, as if he wanted to move away from her but at the same time run towards her.

\- "We need to restrain her." –I whispered at Murphy- "She'll kill us all if she can."

Murphy nodded at me, raising too from the floor.

\- "Look who decided to show up." –Sam stopped moving to face him- "Wait... there's a girl..."

Sam couldn't finish her sentence as Murphy threw herself at her with full force, almost taking her by surprise.

\- "A little help!"

Murphy yelled and Bellamy was quick to move after them to help Murphy; they struggle for a couple minutes before I heard a shot, making me almost jump from my place both surprised and scared.

\- "You shot me."

I heard Sam whisper. Bellamy had managed to restrain her hands but we all knew that wouldn't stop her, which was why the shot happened.

\- "Yeah, sorry about that." –a thud followed Murphy's voice- "She'll thank me for these later."

\- "You shot her!" –Bellamy yelled as he placed an unconscious Sam on the floor as he sat down with her.

\- "On the side of her leg!" –Murphy yelled- "That won't kill her. I also knocked her out since you can't seem to find your fighting's skills, you're welcome."

\- "It had to be done, Bellamy, that’s not her." –I moved next to them to check Sam's wounds- "She's been much, much worse. We have to tie her up before she wakes up, same with Jaha. We have to secure the floor."

Bellamy and Murphy nodded, each of them tying up Jaha and Sam while I moved back to my mom.  _I have to bring her back._ I glanced at Bellamy, who was kneeled on the floor after tying up Sam, caressing her cheeks as a solitary tear fell down his cheek and onto her face.  _I'm sorry._

\- "Take them somewhere else." –I commanded- "If they wake up, they'll tell everyone what we discuss here."

I didn't want to break Bellamy and Sam apart but I needed my mom back. Luckily, Bellamy was too engrossed in his own thoughts to even remember about the EMT we had.

\- "What about your mom?" –Murphy asked as he moved to take Jaha's feet while Bellamy grabbed him by the arms.

\- "I'll check her wounds first." –I lied.

They both seemed to buy it as they moved away with Jaha. I quickly moved to the bag Bellamy had been carrying this whole time that was now next to Ontari and took out the EMT, finishing building it as Raven instructed and doing just as we did with her back at Niylah's house.

\- "Come back to me, mom."

I whispered as I combed her hair away from her face.

\- "I had to..." –I whispered to myself before tearing my eyes away from Sam and looking down at my mom again- "Come on mom." –I closed my eyes, trying hard not to cry.

\- "Clarke?" –my mom's voice was nothing more than a whisper, making me immediately open my eyes and take a relieved breath of air.

\- "Hi." –I smiled, caressing her face.

\- "Clarke." –she repeated.

\- "Yeah." –I couldn't help but chuckle- "You're ok, you're ok." –I helped her sit up- "Here."

The tears started running down my face, happy tears this time as I got my mom back. She blinked a couple times, looking around the room before turning to face me, the realization in her eyes before she broke into sobs too.

\- "I'm sorry."

\- "No, no." –I tried to calm her down- "It's okay, mom."

She covered her face with both her hands as her sobs became louder, I tried to put my hand in her face but she moved back slightly whispering 'sorry' again and again.

\- "I'm so sorry." –she finally looked up at me.

\- "That wasn't you."

\- "I'm..."

\- "It wasn't you, mom. It's okay." –I took her hands in mine- "I need your help now."

I heard heavy footsteps coming back from the hallway and soon enough, Bellamy came inside, pointing his rifle at my mom.

\- "Hey, no!" –I covered her- "It's okay."

\- "What you mean she's okay?" –Murphy questioned- "She's chipped, now A.L.I.E...

\- "The EMP..." –Bellamy trailed off, putting down his rifle.

\- "Care to explain?"

\- "Raven built it so we could take A.L.I.E. out of Ontari's mind before shutting her down but..." –I looked at Ontari.

\- "She's used it on her mom, instead." –I saw the rage in Bellamy's eyes as he clenched his fists, realizing what this meant.

\- "Awesome!" –Murphy smiled moving to where Sam was- "Then let's bring Sam back now!"

\- "It's one use only." –Bellamy broke the news to Murphy- "That was the last one."

\- "Bellamy, I..."

\- "Save it."

He moved towards Sam, picking her up carefully on his arms as if he feared she'd break or disintegrate if he wasn't diligent enough. Murphy stood back, watching Bellamy take Sam away from the room, his eyes lingering on the door for a moment after they disappeared through the hall.

\- "Is the floor secure?"

\- "For now." –Pike who was now on our side too answered me- "Jaha and the guards are tied up in a bedroom. We also took out the elevator and the ladder as we climbed; the stairs are collapsed, no one's following us."

\- "Good, then we have time."

\- "What we don't have is a way down."

\- "Time for what?" –Pike asked me, ignoring Murphy.

\- "An ascension ceremony."

\- "Ascension? You just said Ontari wasn't an option." –Murphy glanced at her- "Besides, she's chipped and we don't have another whatever you called that thing..."

\- "We're not putting the Flame in Ontari's head. We're putting it in mine."

\- "That thing will kill you." –Bellamy entered the room again, alone.

\- "Not if I'm connected to a Nightblood."

\- "Transfusion?" –Pike asked me, confused.

\- "Not exactly."

\- "Connected like Mount Weather." –my mom explained for me as she understood what I was trying to do.

\- "Yes, everything we need is in your med kit."

\- "No, it's too dangerous." –she quickly rose from the ground- "There are too many variables."

\- "But no options." –I ended for her.

\- "Whatever you're doing, you better do it fast." –Octavia rushed into the room followed by an injured Bryan and Miller.

\- "What?" –Bellamy was quick to move beside her- "What happened?"

\- "They're climbing."

As the words hit out ears, we all run outside to look down.  _This is insane._  I turned to look at my mom.

\- "I have to do this."

\- "Ok, I'll help you."

We got back inside, my mom and I quickly starting with the process as the rest came back inside.

\- "Wait a second." –Octavia looked around the room before looking at Bellamy- "Where's Sam?"

Bellamy looked down, unable to confront his sister.

\- "Where's Sam, Clarke?"

\- "She's in the other room." –Pike answered for us- "Tied up so that she won't hurt herself."

\- "What?"

\- "She took the chip."

\- "What!" –the rage in Octavia's voice made me fear she'd do something insane- "What happened?" –she looked at me- "What did A.L.I.E. do."

\- "We were running out of time... They knew I wouldn't give the passphrase for anything..."

\- "A.L.I.E knows what you both mean to Samantha..." –my mom glanced at the siblings before focusing on Bellamy- "So she threatened to torture you next until they both took the chip or Clarke gave up the passphrase." –my mom explained, knowing everything A.L.I.E. knew- "That was it, she broke free..." –she looked at the broken chair next to the wall- "And fought back."

\- "She fought Sheda back." –I clarified for him, Bellamy's head shooting up immediately- "But that wasn't going anywhere... next thing we know, Sheda's on his knees about to get his neck cut open by Ontari and the promise of cutting your head off too after that."

\- "She made it look like she was taking a second to breathe but, in reality, she was thinking of a way to end this."

\- "And the best idea was taking the chip?" –Bellamy wasn't mad, his voice was almost robotic in a way, emotionless- "After all she knows?"

\- "No, she tried to gain time by talking; A.L.I.E. didn't seem to care until she realized you escaped from the guards. Samantha took the chip on two conditions: Sheda leaving the tower and you and your sister not being hurt."

\- "And she agreed..."

\- "She did." –I looked at him- "But..."

\- "But what!"

\- "Before she entered the City of Light, Jaha told her they wouldn't hurt you both if you cooperated..." –she explained as I witnessed Bellamy's fists clenching- "I've never felt such rage..."

\- "If we've all learned something since setting foot down here is you don't play Sam." –Murphy rose from where he stood- "We have to help her."

\- "We will." –Bellamy looked at me- "What do you need us to do?"

\- "Keep me alive."

**\--------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

After Clarke ascended and took the chip, we could only wait and hope she'd find whatever she was looking for fast. We greased the balcony of the throne room, to ensure no one climbed that way, having to secure the other main room on the floor. Murphy and Abbie were in charge of Clarke while the rest of us secured them. Bryan, Miller, Octavia, and Pike were securing the other Balcony and, after a couple minutes, I decided to go check on them, using the walk there to clear my mind.  _Stupid, reckless, selfless Sam, what am I going to do with you? She took the chip for me, she willingly gave herself up, her mind, to save me... me? That have done nothing to deserve redemption... _I don’t deserve her, I truly don’t._  _I sighed. _We need to have a serious discussion of boundaries regarding her safety once this ends._ I had left her tied up in a different room from the rest, in case A.L.I.E. got any more stupid ideas like what she made Abbie do.  _If she's alone in a room, it'll take her longer to work a way out than if they are a collective mind. She'll be safer._ As I made my last turn, I encountered Bryan and Miller coming my way.  _Oh, shit._

\- "You left her alone with Pike?"

Miller simply nodded. I knew he despised Pike almost as much as O and Sam did, but willingly leaving O alone with him was a terrible decision when we were getting ready for war.  _Fuck._  I started running towards the room, making it in time to see Pike on the floor being beaten up by a couple of chipped that had entered through the balcony as Octavia watched from the side.

\- "O!" –I yelled, gaining her attention- "What are you doing?" –I took out my gun.

\- "Bellamy, no!"

She tried to pull me back but I got rid of her, killing two of the men as Pike broke the third one's neck; he was grunting in pain as I got to him and helped him up.

\- "She cut me!"

I looked back at O but her eyes quickly moved behind me. More people were climbing up.

\- "Come on, we have to move!" –I commanded them as I pulled Pike with me.

\- "We can't give up the room!"

\- "We already have."

We got out of there fast, closing the doors behind us and starting to build a contention wall with everything we could find.

\- "I told you, you need to get yourself under control if we're gonna survive this."

Pike spoke to O but I knew all too well she wasn't going to listen to him. As we got the last piece of furniture up, she reclined against it, hitting her head hard on it.

\- "O?" –I looked at her- "O, listen to me. I know how you feel, I let my need for revenge put me on the wrong side. I don't want that for you."

I couldn't say anything else as the people on the other side started to push against the doors, trying to get them to open.

\- "You keep it close." –O looked at me- "I'll get more for the barricade."

I nodded and she quickly left through the hall to take whatever she could find.

\- "It wasn't the wrong side." –Pike spoke to me as he made a tourniquet to his leg- "If the Grounder army was still there when Lexa died, they would have attacked and you know it."

\- "I wanted to see things like you." –I confessed- "I needed that, to believe that they were bad and we were good. I don't know what to believe anymore... I just know I have to live with what I've done. I can’t fix what I did, but I can try to be better."


	30. Survival is our specialty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The time has come, take her down. We love reunions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> S3 finale is here!

**OCTAVIA'S POV**

Bellamy sounded sincere, but that wasn't going to bring Lincoln back.  _But he's right, I can't let my hunger for revenge get in the way, especially not now that Sam's life's on the line._  Not yet. As I was grabbing more furniture to bring back on one of my trips, Bryan and Miller joined me and, eventually, we did run out of things to throw into the barricade.

-       "This isn't gonna hold for long!" –Bryan slightly panicked.

-       "How the hell did they even get in here?" –Miller yelled over the noise.

-       "Doesn't matter." –Bellamy glanced at me- "This is where we make our stand."

-       "Sounds like there's a lot of them." –Miller sighed- "May be time to go to guns."

-       "We got something better than guns..." –Pike spoke from behind us, for he was the only one not pushing the barricade against the door- "...surprise."

As he quickly explained his idea, we all got away from the barricade and towards one of the hallways. They all hid as I stood in the middle of it with my hands up.  _This better work._

-       "Wait, Kane!" –I spoke as soon as he turned the corner- "Wait." –I repeated as they started coming through the small passage, walking through the water that flooded it- "I give up. I'll take the chip. I want to see my sister again." –I sold the lie.

-       "Good, no one else has to die. Ever." –he smiled at me- "Then you can tell us where everyone else is and, maybe, you can even convince your mentor of joining us too."

-       "Indra's alive?"

After she threw herself at Kane before the explosion down the corridors to save him, I thought she might have died, or that Kane had killed her.

-       "Yes... on the cross, suffering needlessly."

-       "Now!"

I yelled, cutting Kane enough, having had enough of the tumultuous description, and quickly jumped over a box to get away from the water as Bellamy and Miller threw a couple batons on the water, electrocuting everyone there and knocking them out.

-       "Hurry up!" –Pike commanded- "Let's get their weapons."

And that's what we did, making sure none of them had anything to fight us with; then, we entrenched ourselves inside the throne room: Abbie was standing next to Clarke, keeping track of her state while Murphy pumped Ontari's heart that had stopped somewhere around the lane; Pike, Miller, Bryan, Bellamy and I stood in front of the main door, ready to fight back. The chipped were already on the other side, trying to bring down the barrier we had built inside the room; it would take them time, but they would succeed with time and patience.

-       "Alright, everybody, this is it." –Bellamy spoke as the furniture started to come down- "They are unarmed but they won't feel any pain and they won't stop until they're out cold."

-       "Copy that." –Miller was quick to speak beside me- "Go for the knockout."

The sound of a gun clicking behind us made us all turn around, seeing Abbie loading it as she stood in front of Clarke protectively.

-       "Only if they get past you."

 _We are going to need more than a mere gun to survive this. Luck is what we need, some faith like Sam would say._ I smiled to myself before realizing something.  _Kane wanted to know where the rest were, they are going to liberate them, they are going to free Sam and she's going to come here..._  I glanced at Bellamy.  _A.L.I.E. knows he won't be able to kill her. We're screwed. What if I can't help him and she manages to kill him right before Clarke takes A.L.I.E. down... I don't like the answer to that outcome..._ I looked at Clarke.  _Come on Clarke._

-       "If they got Sam, she's probably going to go straight to you." –I spoke moving next to Bellamy- "Are you sure you will be able to handle that?"

-       "I'm not killing Sam." –he stated, conviction fueling his words as he confirmed my suspicions- "I'm getting her back, one way or another."

-       "She's not going to hold back, son."

-       "Then let's hope Clarke makes her part." –Bellamy answered, glancing back at Murphy who nodded in agreement- "Soon."

\- "You don't have to kill her, just fight her back. You know Sam can take a lot physically and she won't blame you once she wakes up."

He sighed beside me, knowing I was right. I was ready to fight, glancing at the door that would burst open any second now.  _Here goes nothing._ After a couple more seconds, the door's behind our safety wall opened and the first Grounders started to come inside, jumping over the barricade.

-       "Here we go!"

Bellamy yelled, being the first one to fight for he was the closest to the entrance. I wanted to keep an eye out for Sam but as more people came in I almost lost sight of everyone around me. I got rid of a couple chipped, turning towards the door for the next one when I saw her, my sister, almost unrecognizable. She looked at the people around her before focusing her eyes on Bellamy, like she couldn't even see me; I was right. I tried to get to his side but a couple more chipped got in my way, as I heard her.

-       "He's mine."

**\----------------------**

**BELLAMY'S POV**

I had seen her before but that didn't make it any easier; if I hadn't known Sam, I'd have assumed this way of behaving, of moving, the calculation in her eyes... I'd have assumed all that was how she really was but I knew better and the difference became crystal clear as she stood in front of me: her eyes were empty and that both scared and frightened me. I knew those eyes, I had learned to live through them and to read Sam's feelings in them, I had felt safe under her gaze and felt the heat on my face as they every so often for a couple months showed me nothing but love... These eyes? I didn't know them, they lacked depth and emotion, they looked like a machine and I hated it. I was also aware of Sam's ability to put up an emotionless façade just like me but this... this was different, she looked robotic, stoic. I didn't have much more time to study her features for she was quick to move after me, her intentions clear: killing me. I knew I had to fight her, but I didn't want to hurt her, so I avoided her blows as best as I could but it didn't take long for her to hit me hard, very hard; with all her training and the fact that she couldn't get tired while A.L.I.E. was in her head, there was no way I could win Sam in a fight. I wasn't sure I wanted to either.  _Either we both survive this, or none of us does._

-       "Come on, Bell." –she suddenly spoke but I couldn't recognize her voice- "Oppose some resistance, this is way too easy, I know you're better than this. This is almost offensive."

Her fist struck right into my jaw but this time I managed to punch her back on the abdomen, making her take a step back.

\- "Now this is what I'm talking about." -she looked at me with a creepy smile on her face- "That's good, let out some stamina while you can, put your rage to use. Lincoln didn't train with you for you to be fucking ridiculous. He'd be so disappointed if you hadn't killed him."

I knew that wasn't Sam, she had never blamed me for it. I knew it but, still, hearing those words coming out of her mouth hurt, which I knew was the whole point.

\- "Hey, focus back on me." -her voice brought me back from my mind- "Don't go fantasizing about your queen now. She'll be dead soon."

\- "A.L.I.E., drop it."

\- "Sensible topic, huh?" -she struck back, her fist hitting my chest, making me gasp for air- "Fight me."

-       "I won't harm Sam, A.L.I.E."

As I finished, her foot hit me so hard on my outer knee that it made me land on the floor; Sam moved after me, quickly straddling my hips, pinning me down before I could raise back up, so I gave up. No one else bothered come fighting me. A.L.I.E. knew Sam was my weakness just like she had exploited me as hers.

-       "Oh, but that's funny." –Sam's spoke tilting her head slightly- "You already have: you broke my heart."

My eyes widened. I knew A.L.I.E. was trying to get to me and she was doing a good job, which I should have seen coming since she had Sam now and she knew me better than I knew myself right now.

-       "Yeah... Sam's memories are crowded with pain and death... she should be glad she can't remember anything..." -she reached down my belt, taking out the only blade I was carrying- "...but the one that stands out the most is when she realized loving you was destroying you." –she trapped one of my arms with her leg, making sure I couldn't fight back- "You broke her heart by not being strong enough for her. Although realizing she's not your only one is right up there..." –her head shook for a second and, if I had blinked I'd have missed it- "She's fighting back..." –she whispered- "...that won't happen again. She's ours."

-       "I'm sorry Sam; if you're still there and you can hear me..." –I placed my free hand on her thigh and started to draw circles over the fabric of her pants- "I never meant to break your heart, I would rather have broken mine..."

-       "Oh, but that can be easily fixed." –Sam chuckled placing the knife that had been on my neck over my heart- "She said once that if you hurt her, she'd kill you, and that's what she should have done the first time." –she pressed the tip against my t-shirt- "You should have taken the key when you had the chance, you could have lived with me in The City of Light... forever."

-       "I love you, Sam, I have since I met you and I always will."

I never stopped looking at her; even if Sam wasn't there anymore, her face was the last thing I wanted to see before I died. I felt the knife start to pierce through my skin but, suddenly, the pressure disappeared completely; Sam fell to the side, letting go of the knife and moving her hands to her head as she started screaming.

-       "Sam!" –I was quick to rise and move after her- "Sam, what's happening?"

A second later, everyone around us stopped fighting and those who had been chipped fell to the ground; I glanced confused around me, seeing Clarke opening her eyes and realizing A.L.I.E. was finally gone.

-       "Sam, Sam!" –I held her up to my chest- "You're back, love, I got you."

-       "So much pain..." –she cried out- "Make it stop!"

She pushed me away and moved back towards the wall, resting her back against it and pulling her knees to her chest, hugging herself; she looked so scared and in pain... I remembered something Raven had mentioned about getting rid of A.L.I.E.: your memories come back all at once, so Sam was now feeling all the pain she had gone through in one sitting and I couldn't help her, my blood running cold as she screamed in agony.

-       "Sam, listen to me, listen to my voice." –I approached her slowly trying to soothe her- "I need you to take deep breaths and try to relax your body. Focus on me."

-       "I...can't... please, end this..." –she looked up at me- "Kill me."

The tears were pouring down her face now and I couldn't stand seeing her like that, I had seen Sam in pain way too many times, but this? This was something else; my eyes filling with tears of rage at my own inability to help her.

-       "I am so sorry, my love." –I finally got to her and barely placed my hands over her knees, knowing physical contact was the last thing she needed right now- "I'm sorry I can't do anything to numb your pain."

I just hoped this would end soon and Sam could recover and move on. After what seemed like hours, her breath started to even and there were no more tears in her face as she looked up at me.

-       "Why didn't you fight me back?" –she looked so small, so tired, her voice breaking- "Bellamy, I almost killed you!" –she spoke in between breaths- "Why didn't you fight me back, why didn't you kill me!?"

-       "I couldn't hurt you." –I moved closer to her.

-       "A couple more seconds and I would have killed you!"

-       "That wasn't you, Sam." –I dared to move my hand to her face, but she flinched away- "You haven't hurt me."

I took her hands in mine; she tried to fight me, but this time I pulled her to sit on my lap and wrapped my arms around her so that she couldn't get away from me.

-       "I got you, love." –I stroke her hair- "You're safe now."

-       "I'm sorry." –she whispered as she gave in and I felt all her weight against me- "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean anything I said as A.L.I.E." –she started crying again, wrapping her arms around my torso and hiding her face on my chest- "I love you, I could never hurt you, I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to fight her back."

-       "Sam, you're so strong." –I kissed her head- "You did nothing wrong."

Her sobs grew quieter, her body started to calm down and the spasms died out; she eventually pulled back slowly to look into my eyes.

-       "I'm so glad you're safe..." -a small smile appeared on her lips- "She wanted to kill you... I couldn't.... I'm sorry."

She hid her face again as she started to sob again against my chest and I couldn't help but tear up a bit too. We stood like that for a moment, her grip around me was tight as if she feared I'd disappear so I softly whispered sweet nothings into her ear; she apologized a thousand times as much as I tried to make her stop.

\- "Sam, you don't have to apologize for anything." -I kissed her forehead as she moved back- "I know how A.L.I.E. got you to take the chip... you gave yourself up for me... I don't deserve you."

\- "And I'd do it again. The mere thought of you getting hurt haunts me and I..."

-       "Samantha Besnik Blake!" –Octavia came next to us, dropping to her knees, cutting Sam off- "You stupid sister and your stupid little plans! What the hell were you thinking?"

-       "I'm sorry..." –she looked at O as she wiped the tears away from her face- "For what's worth, I'm in a lot of mental pain right now."

-       "Come here."

Octavia opened her arms and Sam quickly moved next to her as I looked at them, happiness overflowing my system.  _She is a Blake after all. Not because of me or what we were, but on her own merits... she is Octavia's sister._  The moment, however, vanished quickly as someone else cleared their throat behind us, making me turn around to see who it was as they broke apart.

-       "You."

Sam was the first to speak, her voice a threat as she rose menacingly. Whatever pain she had been feeling, she pushed it away; it amazed me to see how her body language changed completely as soon as she landed eyes on Pike, it was almost hard to believe just seconds ago she was wrapping onto my shirt as if her life depended on it, crying her eyes out.

-       "Glad you survived."

I rose from the floor as Octavia did the same, the grip on her blade getting tighter.

-       "I can't say I feel the same way. I was hoping you'd have been executed by now." –Sam whispered and glanced at Octavia before a smile made its way to her lips, not a good smile- "But, in the spirit of Jusheda, I know that can be easily fixed."

Before I could react, Octavia rose her sword and put it through Pike's chest; he grunted as he looked at them not expecting at all this end; unable to say anything, he fell to the floor as Octavia ripped her sword from his body.

-       "Jus drein, jus daun."

Sam recited as they both looked down at Pike as he took his last breath; then, Sam looked at O and hugged her, her gaze softening only for her.  _Jusheda._  I'd be lying if I said this new side of them didn't concern me.

-       "That should give you some type of closure, O."

-       "I'm so glad to have you back, Sam."

-       "I'm glad to be by your side again, sistris."

Octavia didn't even look at me before she left the room. Sam turned around, looking behind me and I turned around too, only to see Clarke raising from the throne as they interchanged a knowing look.

**\----------------------**

**MURPHY'S POV**

Definitively, pumping Ontari's heart had to be up there at the very top of the most disgusting things I had ever had to do to survive but, once Clarke finally opened her eyes and every single chipped person fell to the floor in various degrees of pain, I breathed relieved. However, there was a particular scream that made me wish I couldn't hear for a second; it was Sam. I wasn't sure what exactly had happened, but she seemed to have been fighting Bellamy and, for the looks of it, she had been about to kill him. She seemed to be in a lot of pain and I failed to comprehend why, I thought there was no pain in the City of Light.

\- "She's getting all her memories back." -Clarke spoke to me, probably understanding my concern- "We saw this with Raven, A.L.I.E. used her pain against her and I think she was trying to do the same with Sam before I disconnected her."

I had never seen Sam like that, although that could have been because I had left for months but, for the look of concern on Bellamy's face, I understood this wasn't the rule.  _Sam, Sam, Sam, I'm going to have to teach you to stop putting everyone else before yourself, that is something I sure can help you with; I'm the cockroach for a reason._ I was cleaning my hands on my pants when I recognized another voice.

\- "John?" -Emori's voice cracked as I turned to look at her- "I'm sorry..."

\- "Hey." -I ran up to her, embracing her in my arms as tight as I could- "It's ok, it's ok."

\- "I didn't mean to..."

\- "Emori, hey, it's ok." -I looked into her eyes- "She's gone. We survived."

A small smile appeared on her lips as her sobs died out.

\- "I thought I'd never see you again."

\- "I'm a cockroach, survival is my specialty."

A loud thud made us both turn around, seeing Pike bleeding from his chest on the floor as Sam and Octavia watched him die.  _It was an interesting reunion indeed._

\- "Your friends are ok?"

\- "I know you want to know who Sam is exactly." -I smiled at her, knowing Emori liked my stories about Sam- "Let me introduce you."

I let go of Emori for a second as she wiped the tears away from her face while I cleared my throat, making Sam turn around.

-       "So... I say next time just leave these idiots deal with it, Sam." -I moved closer to her- "It's been working just fine for me."

-       "You fucking asshole!" –she chuckled running up to me as her face lit up,  _maybe she missed me too_ \- "I so wanna kill you right now for leaving me without saying shit!"

-       "It's nice seeing you too, Sam."

-       "I know we don't do this much but..." –she didn't finish her thought but I knew where she was going as she wrapped her arms around me- "I've missed you."

-       "I've missed having friends, yes."

-       "You're an ass." –she moved back after I squeezed her in my arms, hitting me on the chest.

-       "I've missed you in particular." –I smiled- "A lot."

-       "You have to tell me where the fuck you were and how you managed to survive, I want all the details."

-       "I'll tell you everything if you do too."

-       "You got it." –she smiled.

\- "I'm sorry about, you know..."

\- "You did what you had to do, I owe you." -she caressed the back of her head, where I had hit her before- "So, what are you doing here? Like, how did you end up up here?"

-       "You don't think Bellamy came all the way up here alone to save you, right?" –I scoffed as Sam rose an eyebrow at me, before turning to look at Bellamy who was standing close enough to hear our conversation.

\- "It's true." -Bellamy nodded- "He came through."

-       "So, you're telling me that instead of saving your life, like it's your nature, you came all the way up here because I was in trouble?" –I nodded, absolutely pleased with myself- "I knew you liked me." -she spoke with a grin on her face that muted into a soft chuckle as she finished.

-       "Well, I couldn't just abandon the only person down here that likes me."

-       "Well, I'm sure now everyone likes you a bit more, you helped save the day, M! If you stick around longer this time, I may have to start considering you family too, you know? It's been a long way since Earth Skills."

-       "Earth Skills?"

-       "Let's just say seeing Pike brought back some memories..." –Sam chuckled and I did too.

-       "I know he tried to execute you a couple of times, so I'm glad he's finally dead."

-       "Me too." –Sam glanced at Pike's body for a second- "He took too much from us."

-       "So..." –I quickly changed the subject seeing whatever Pike had done, had not only fucked up Octavia, but also Sam- "I want you to meet someone."

\- "You made new friends? Without me?" -she placed her hand over her heart, mocking tone as she faked being hurt- "Wao, rude."

\- "Sam..." -I took Emori's hand on mine, making her walk up to Sam- "This is Emori."

Sam looked at Emori, her eyes quickly traveling to my hand in hers and a small smiled appeared on her lips. I knew if anyone would accept Emori, that was Sam, but I was still nervous about this.

\- "Now, now..." -Sam walked up to Emori- "Are you okay with physical contact?" -Emori looked at me, confused.

\- "Sam...?"

\- "Oh, sorry, that came out so wrong." -she chuckled slightly- "I meant, can I hug you or should we shake hands? Whatever you're comfortable with."

Emori let go of my hand and soon they were hugging, which made me joyful on the inside, not that I'd ever show it.

\- "It's so very nice to meet you." -Sam smiled happily as they let go- "I knew this idiot over here had to have some's help to still be alive."

\- "Ouch."

\- "I'm joking, M." -she turned to Emori- "Contrary to what you just saw..." -she looked over her shoulder at Pike's dead body- "I'm not always spilling blood... I can be nice too."

\- "So, you're Jusheda."

\- "You know about that?"

\- "I've heard things."

\- "Well, I haven't." -I placed one of my hands over each of their shoulders- "Was busy staying alive... Care to explain?"

\- "It's a long story..."

\- "We have nothing but time."

\- "Murphy has told me about you, we can skip through all that until I found him."

\- "So you did tell her about me, huh?" -Sam rose an eyebrow at me- "All good things, I hope."

\- "Mostly, yeah." -Emori laughed.

\- "Welcome to the family then, Emori. Any "friend" of Murphy is my friend." -Sam looked at me with a smirk on her face, completely reading us before turning to Emori again- "I'm glad Murphy has someone there for him."

\- "Alright, enough of this." -I cut them before they started talking about me- "What's Jusheda and who's this Sheda everyone keeps..."

-       "Fuck!" –Sam's face dropped- "I have to find him, he's probably going to be so confused! I'll fill you in once I find him!"

She stormed out of the room, leaving me extremely confused myself.

\- "Did I say something wrong?" -I asked as Bellamy moved after her.

\- "Let's go." -Bellamy looked at me- "Once we find him, she'll tell you about him."

\- "Is this the guy she left you for?"

\- "I thought she might, but no."

We were both moving after Sam when Clarke called for Bellamy.

-       "We have to talk."

-       "We'll go with her." –I offered, seeing the clash of wants in Bellamy's posture.

Emori and I started moving after Sam, down to the ground.

\- "So, Sam... and that was Bellamy, right?"

\- "Yeah."

\- "Not what I expected." -I gave her a questioning look- "You'd think he'd run after her instead of doing whatever he's doing back there with the other girl."

\- "Clarke and Bellamy are co-leaders, it's always been like this..."

We continued in silence as I went over what Emori had just said.  _He wouldn't dare. Right?_

\- "You really don't know what Jusheda means, do you?"

\- "No."

\- "Sam's the Commander of Blood."

\- "Can't say it doesn't suit her. You should have seen her back in Arkadia, I thought she'd die fighting that man."

\- "I liked all you've told me about Sam, but I like her better in person. She looks strong and trustworthy."

\- "She is."

_It's good to be back. For now at least._

 


End file.
